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Part 3: Chapter 8: Forever Girl

DPOV

I drove around aimlessly, trying to find anything to take my mind off of my current depression. However, everywhere I went, I was reminded of My Roza. The park, where I watched her play with the kids during Christmas break. Thinking of how wonderful it will be when it was our own children she was playing with. The diner, we go there after every home game and get chocolate milkshakes. She always drinks half of mine after finishing hers. I gripe at her every time, but now I would give anything to be sitting there with her now. The campus, where we walk between classes together, either holding hands or my arm draped over her shoulder, hers around my waist, recreating our highschool days. The cafe, where I would watch her in her element, enjoying being free and happy.

Everywhere.

Part of me felt like I would never see her again, that I should prepare myself for the inevitable. Then the other part, I wanted to knock down every door from her to kingdom come to find her. I would never give up on looking for her, I would fight till my last breath.

I was back on the interstate, headed in the same direction her phone had shown her going. No destination in mind, I just drove. The bluetooth in my truck went off, MOB BOSS, flashed on the dash.

"What, Abe?" I didn't want to talk to anyone, he knew that.

"You need to get home, NOW!" he yelled.

"What's going on?" I was starting to freak out.

"Just come home now, I will tell you when you get here."

"I'll be there in ten." I hung up the phone, hit the first exit I could and hauled ass back to the house.

My mind running the whole time, did they find her? Was she okay? I pulled into the drive, tires coming to a screeching halt as I got to the garage.

Abe and Pavel were loading the Suburban with all types of stuff. Guns, knives, some rope and a huge plastic sheet, what the fuck are they doing?

"What the hell is going on? Did you find her?"

"One of my contacts called, they saw him in a small town about two hours away, he was buying food. They are following him and will update us when they see where he goes to."

"Was she with him?"

"No, he was alone, but they said he was buying quite a bit, stocking up I would assume. If we hurry up, we should be able to get there shortly after he gets back to where ever she is."

Without another word, we loaded into the Suburban and headed back north. When we reached the point that we lost her GPS, Abe took an exit about three miles ahead. He had gotten off the interstate right after we lost the signal, what is the chance of that?

We drove for an hour, I was trembling with anxiety, I was going to get my Roza and bring her home. My heart was racing faster as Abe's phone began ringing.

"Hello…. Are you sure..." he rambled an address to Pavel, who put it in the GPS, "Okay, we are only thirty minutes from there… If you see her, you go in and get her, I don't care what you have to do… Well, try to leave him alive until I get there… Thank you, call me if anything changes." he hung up.

"They are in a cabin off Green River in Kentucky. They are staged outside now and won't move in unless they see her."

"Kentucky? What the hell is there?"

"Apparently, nothing, which for him was perfect."

"She has been two hours away this whole time?"

"It would appear so, Son." he looked at me in the rear view, "We couldn't have known, don't do that to yourself."

He could see the pain in my eyes, she is so close, how could I not have found her? Yeah, he left the state, but still two hours away and I had no idea.

"Dimitri, I know you are anxious to get her back, we all are, but you have to be prepared for what we might find." Pavel said.

"I know." I rasped out, the thought of finding Rose, broken, hurt or worse, I couldn't breath. She will be okay, she is okay. I repeated the mantra in my head, over and over again. She has to be okay.

We turned off onto a dirt road, I was looking around, there was nothing out here. We were at least twenty minutes from the closest town. My heart was beating out of my chest as we pulled up next to the truck Abe's contact sat in. We were parked about fifty yards from the cabin.

"Anything?" Abe asked the man.

"No Sir, he went in with the groceries, we saw a few lights turn on, but the windows are too dirty to see in."

"Are you.." I didn't hear the rest of his question. I took off in a dead sprint for the door.

I could hear Abe trying to call me, but he didn't want to yell and alert Ben that we were here. I was not five feet from the door when I heard a gunshot go off.

"NOOOO!" I yelled as I kicked in the door.

The sight before me took my already ragged breath away. Roza lay on the floor, Ben on top of her, neither of them moving. Roza's eyes were locked right to mine, slowly they started to close.

"ROZA!" I ran to her, grabbing Ben's shirt and throwing him into the wall. I felt like superman, the strength I held right now was unbelievable.

"Roza, baby, open your eyes, please love, look at me." I pleaded with her. Looking over her body I didn't see any sign of harm, the gun was firmly in her hand. I pried it away from her fingers and heard Abe enter the house.

Taking in the sight of his daughter, he was broken, but looking over to the man responsible, he was murderous. Before he could move though, I was already in his face.

"What the fuck did you do to her?" I yelled as loud as I could, I began repeatedly punching him in the face.

"I...I didn't…" he tried to sputter out, his mouth dripping with his own blood.

"YOU..FUCKING...BASTARD.." I enunciated every word with a punch to his stomach.

"He will be lucky if he is still breathing by the time I am done." Abe muttered, "Dimitri, get my daughter out of here, take the truck. I will handle him, she needs help."

I could hardly hear him, rage thundered in my ears, red hazed my vision. I continued to pumble him, every hit I landed, visions flashed in my head. Him taking her, him touching her, hurting her, I wanted him to pay, I wanted him to feel physically what I have been feeling emotionally for weeks. I wanted him dead.

"Dimitri, Son, stop." Abe put a hand on my shoulder. "Go to her, let me handle this."

I looked over to Rose, her eyes were still closed, breathing seemed even, that was a good sign. I breathed deeply and crawled across the floor.

"Роза, моя Роза, пожалуйста, детка, не оставляй меня, пожалуйста, проснись" (Roza, My Roza, please baby, don't leave me, Please wake up)

I cradled her in my arms, she felt lighter, more delicate. I was careful not to jolt her around and walked toward the door. Pavel was walking in with the supplies they had packed into the SUV. I heard Abe say, "Now, how about we have a talk about what you did to my daughter?" before the door closed and I walked away.

I laid Roza down in the passenger seat, checking her over more thoroughly to see the extent of her injuries. Her head was bleeding, wrist were raw and bruised, but I didn't see a bullet hole. That was my main concern. I googled the closest hospital, setting the navigation, I headed off. Pleading with Roza the whole way, in both languages. I needed her to be okay, I needed her to wake up, I just needed her.

As I drove, I continued to look over at Rose. She wasn't moving at all, but her breathing remained steady. I can't lose her now, I just found her. Again the mantra coursed through my head, she will be okay, she will be okay.

Pulling up to the front of the hospital, I raced inside and grabbed the first nurse I saw.

"Please help me, my wife is unconscious and her head is bleeding badly." I rushed out in a single breath.

A team of people ran out to the truck, two others followed with a stretcher. I watched them carefully load Roza onto the bed and roll her away. I wanted to follow, but one nurses stopped me.

"They have to take her for scanning. She is in good hands now, come with me and we can get started on her paperwork."

I followed her to the desk, she handed me a stack of papers, I stared at it for a moment. There were a thousand questions on here. I don't even know if I know the answers to all of them, but I had nothing else to do. I took a seat in the waiting room, texted Abe and begin to fill in the blanks.

Name, Date of Birth, Sex, Age, all the basics, I got that. Then family history and personal history, well I know almost all of that. I doubt there is much she ever kept from me. Next, Medications. Her birth control.

As that realization hit me, I wanted to go back to that cabin and castrate him. I swear if he got her pregnant I would...well, I really don't know what I would do. The thought of raising his child killed me, then again would she want to?

I assumed he raped her, but I wasn't sure, I didn't stop beating him long enough to find out. I know Abe would though. Cross that bridge if it comes, don't think about it until you know more. I continued to fill in the answers.

Abe arrived fifteen minutes.

"Done already?" I tried to joke, but it sounded more astonished, I figured he would drag out the torture.

"You didn't leave me with much to do, beside, the gunshot wound was draining him. I called in the police so they could handle that."

"So she did shoot him. I didn't see anything on her, but I wasn't sure that it had hit him. Is he going to make it?"

"I don't know, we didn't help the blood loss. The shot landed in his abdomen, so there is a chance, but right now, well, it doesn't look good."

"Let's not tell her about that."

"Agreed. So, did you get that all filled out?" he looked at the stack of papers I still held.

"Most of it, one thing is worrying me though." I showed him her medication list. His eyes darkened. "Did he say if.." I couldn't finish, I had thought it, but saying it was another matter.

"No. He said he kept her locked in the back room and withheld everything from her. He wanted to beat her down, so she would become reliant on him."

I felt he was lying, the way his eyes darkened at the same realization I held, he was defiantly hiding something. I nodded and moved back over to the waiting room chair. With Abe's help we finished her paperwork and turned it in, now we wait.

RPOV

Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep

What the hell is that?

Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep

"Dimka, you should go back to the hotel and sleep." Olena said, I would know her voice anywhere.

"I can't, Mama, I have to be here when she wakes up." I heard the silky smooth Russian accent of my husband, reply.

"We have no idea how long it will be, the doctors said she is stable and you need sleep."

Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep

Heart rate monitor. I wasn't in the cabin anymore, I don't think I have ever been grateful to hear that annoying ass beeping.

"I will be fine, I am not leaving her, that's final."

I felt his warm hand close around mine, sending fire through my body at the loving contact, such a contrast to what I have felt for the past two weeks. I felt like I was in a limbo, between awake and asleep. The comfort of him in the dark was more than welcome. I wanted to open my eyes, I wanted to move, but I couldn't. My brain and body were not communicating, I could hear everything, even feel, but I couldn't respond.

Soft lips pressed to my forehead, "Wake up soon, Roza, Dimka is going crazy. I love you, docha'."

I am trying, I just can't. I heard a door slide open, then close, silence filled the air. Come on stupid hand, move! I wanted to let Dimitri know I could hear him, that I was here and I love him, even if he won't love me after I tell him everything. The door opened again.

"Olena told me you don't want to leave, but you need to get some sleep, Dimitri. I will stay with her, go get some food and rest."

Baba.

"Neither of you are going to make me leave, why can't you just accept that and leave us be?"

"Because we care, nothing is going to change in the next few hours, doc said that the swelling was going down, but it would be a while before she wakes up. Go get a shower, grab some lunch and take a nap at the hotel."

"I don't want her to wake up and not be here, she needs me." his voice was thick with emotion.

He was right, I did need him, but I needed him to take care of himself too, if only I could freaking wake up now so he would go get some sleep. Again, I tried to move, open my eyes, something.

"What happened to him?" Dimitri asked.

"He didn't make it." Baba replied.

My heart constricted in my chest, hammering rapidly, the monitor beeping increased. I didn't want to think about him, but my mind wouldn't stop, his hands, his face, recounting every moment. Wait, did he say he didn't make it? He's dead?

"What's happening, why is her heart rate going crazy?"

I heard shuffling, Dimitri was calling out for me, and several other voices were joining in with his.

"Sir, please step outside for a moment, let us figure out what's going on."

"Come on, Dimitri, now." Baba ordered.

The voices began to fade, I felt tired, really tired. I gave in, if my body wouldn't do what I wanted it to, I would shut my mind off with it.

She's dancing in a field

A flower in her hair
Sitting on my tailgate

I can't help but stare
Summer sun a shining
On her tan skin
I can feel her love
Blowing like the wind

Was I in heaven, I swear I could hear angels singing.

Yes I can
We head out to the lake
Feet hanging off the dock
And talking everything
Sharing every little thought

Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep

Nope, not heaven, the monitor is still beeping, well I guess that's a good thing.

I could start to make out the words, it was my favorite song, Dimitri always sang it to me whenever it came on the radio.

We take a dip in the water
As the sun set on down
Ain't nothing like her wet hair
And the crickets sound
It's a glass of wine to keep her sane
And I love the sound of her full name
Natural southern beauty
Can't explain what it does to me

She's everything in my whole world
That's my forever girl

I squeezed his hand and he stopped, "Roza?", if I could see his face right now, I'm sure he would look like a child on christmas, his voice held such hope in just one word.

"Keep…" I tried to talk, but it hurt, my throat was so dry.

We ride around in my truck
Singing our songs
She's looking so damn good
WIth that sundress on

He let go of my hand, a second later I felt something touch my lips, "Drink, Roza.", he continued to sing.

She slides on over
I hold her tight
And I say darling
Thank god that you're mine
It's a glass of wine to keep her sane
And I love the sound of her full name
Natural southern beauty
Can't explain what it does to me
She's everything in my whole world
That's my forever girl

It's a glass of wine to keep her sane
And I love the sound of her full name
Natural southern beauty
Can't explain what it does to me
She's everything in my whole world
That's my forever girl
That's my forever girl
That's my forever girl

The sultry sound of his voice wrapped around me, I felt like I was home. I didn't realize how just the sound of his voice can bring peace to me. He always had a knack for calming me with only a touch, but it's him, all of him, he brings peace to my world. With my eyes closed, I could imagine we were anywhere I wanted to be, on the beach in Grand Cayman again, or on the ship, consummating our love for the first time. I wasn't scared, I wasn't hurt, I was happy. Here in my own little bubble away from the torment of reality. But I wanted to see him, I wanted to drink in every last bit of him that I could.

I tried to open my eyes, the lights were so bright though, "Can you turn the lights off?", my voice sounded forgin to me, raspy and low, but at least I could speak. I heard him move away again.

"There off, Roza."

I tried again, blinking several times.

"There's those beautiful eyes I have missed so much." he leaned forward to kiss my head, I flinched back. "Sorry, I didn't think.."

I didn't mean to flinch at his loving gesture, but as I opened my eyes and took in my surrounding, reality did indeed set in. I was scared in general, being awake was so different than being asleep. Asleep, or half conscious I should say, I lavished in the feeling of his skin touching mine, his honey like voice caressing my ears. Awake however, looking into Dimitri's soft brown eyes, they turned blue, I couldn't see past my fear to my loving husband.

"It's okay, I missed you, too. How long have I been out?" I tried to roll over it, I didn't want him to think I was afraid of him.

"A few days, you cracked your head pretty good." sitting back in the chair, he looked down, "I was so scared, Rose, I thought I would never see you again."

"Hey, look at me," he slowly lifted his head, I could see the tears ready to fall, "I am okay, well, I will be. I am here, you can't get rid of me that easy, Comrade." I joked, trying to conceal the fear I was still holding. It would take a long while to get over this, would he stay?

"I never want to lose you, to think I had," he paused, his voice full of anguish. "I am so sorry, Roza. This is my fault, I should have never let this happen."

You say that now, just wait, I thought, you don't know what happened, or does he? I will find out later, right now I need him to stop punishing himself.

"Don't blame yourself, you didn't do this, he did. You found me, that's what matters."

"He shouldn't have been able to get to you, I should have been a man and stepped up and talked to you instead of pushing you away. If I had, this would have never happened. I am sorry, so sorry."

"Stop, Dimitri. Stop blaming yourself, stop apologizing, just stop, please. It's over, we will move on in time and get on with our lives. So, please, I need you to be here for me, not blame yourself for something that was out of your control."

"When did you become the level headed one?"

"When I married the master of Zen Life Lessons." I laughed.

"I'm going to get the Doctor to check on you. I will be right back."

A few minutes later, a pretty young Doctor walked in, Dimitri right behind her.

"Hello, Rose, it's good to see you awake, I am Doctor Ivashkov and before you ask, yes I am related to Adrian."

"Wow, what are the chances of that?" I laughed, "So, how bad is it?"

"Dimitri said the same thing," she laughed, "Well, you did quite the number on your head, small skull fracture with some swelling. We were able to get that under control pretty quickly. You may still have some headaches and dizziness, but overall your scans and vitals show to be fine."

"So when can I go home?"

"We want to keep an eye on you one more day, as long as we don't have any trouble in the next twenty four hours, you can leave then."

I nodded, "Where are we anyways?"

"Kentucky, two hours from home." Dimitri answered.

Really, I have been so close to home this whole time? It felt like we were driving for a lot longer than that.

Dimitri caught my look, "Yeah, I thought the same thing."

"Try to rest, Rose, myself or the nurse will check on you every few hours, so sleep while you can. If you need anything, don't hesitate to call us."

The Doctor left and Dimitri came to sit back by the bed. I took a moment to finally get a good look at him, he looked like he had aged ten years in the last two weeks. His hair was dull, the underneath of his eyes were dark and hollow, his skin pale and he seemed thinner, like he hasn't eaten in a while.

"When was the last time you slept or ate a decent meal?" I asked, giving him my don't try and lie face.

"The night before you left."

"Comrade!" I knew he would have had a hard time, but he needed to take care of himself, too.

"What? You wanted me to answer honestly, didn't you?" he raised his brow.

"Yes." I grunted, "Look, you have seen me awake, I am breathing and well on my way to recovery. Will you please go to the hotel, shower and eat something, then get some sleep."

"I am fine.." I attempted to raise a brow at him, he laughed, "Fine, but I will send Abe or Mama over to sit with you. No arguments."

"Fine, sleep well, Comrade."

'You too, Roza, I love you."

"I love you, too."

As the door closed behind him, I let go of the pain I was harnessing. I tried to sound brave, like it didn't bother me, honestly, I think he bought it. Probably only because he is wrapped up in his own self guilt. I wanted so badly to be wrapped in his arms, him hold me and tell me everything will be alright. To smell his aftershave and own personal scent, draw it in like a drug and never let go. To enjoy him while I can, he surely isn't going to want me after he finds out what happened.

I fell asleep about ten minutes after Dimitri left, but it didn't stay that way. Nightmares plagued my dreams, images from the cabin, the events of that room, fighting for my life. I felt trapped, trapped in the house, trapped in my own mind. I needed out, now, but I couldn't.

I could feel his hands on me, the cold metal of the handcuffs still hanging on my wrist. Those ocean blue eyes filled with such malice and possessiveness. The sound of his voice as he talked about "our future", the sounds he made during the night events, the words he would say. All of it, clear as day, on continuous replay.

"Rosemarie! Wake up!"

I bolted straight up in the hospital bed, gasping for air. I felt a hand touch my arm and jerked away, I didn't want anyone to touch me, who would want to?

"Rosemarie?"

I looked into the concerned eyes of my father, the same eyes I had.

"It's okay, Rose, it was just a dream, you are safe now." he said.

"It wasn't a dream though, it was real, every single part was real." The memories were still dancing around in my head, everytime I blinked his face would flash before my eyes.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I don't know how." I lowered my head, hoping he doesn't see the tears cascading down my cheeks.

"Anyway you want or can, Kiz. Whenever you are ready, we are all here for you."

I nodded, there was one question I had for him, I wasn't sure I wanted to know the answer, but I needed to.

"What did you do to him?" I looked into my father's eyes.

"I didn't kill him, if that is what you are wanting to know. I got the information I wanted and called the authorities to take care of him. I wanted to, I wanted him to pay, but I knew you wouldn't be happy if I did anything worse."

I remembered him saying Ben was dead, if he didn't kill him, what did.

"I heard you, you told Dimitri he didn't make it, if you didn't do it..."

"He lost a lot of blood, due to multiple things, he wasn't able to recover from it."

"You're lying. What happened?"

He let out a heavy sigh, mulling something over in his head, like he didn't know if he should tell me. I gave him a pointed look, finally he said, "The gun shot. It pierced his stomach and sliced through major organs, they weren't able to repair them."

"I killed him.", it wasn't a question, I knew that my hand took his life. I hated what he became, but I didn't want him to die, especially because of me.

Dad didn't say anything, what could he say? Not only to the fact that I killed someone, but knowing what happened before then. How much did Ben tell him before he died?

"How much...how much did he tell you?" my voice cracked, tears descending faster down my face. He reached forward, I flinched away.

"Everything." his tone just as broken as mine.

I let the sobs take over, my whole body convulsing. My father knew of everything he did to me, how can he even look at me. How can he be in the same room? I felt used and worthless at this moment, I have since the first time he did it. If Dad knows…

"Do..does Dimitri…" I couldn't get the words out.

"No. I didn't tell him, he asked but I only told him about you being locked in the room, not what happened in it."

"He's not going to want me after he finds out." burying my head in my hands, the fear I had of losing Dimitri was a hundred times worse than any fear I felt over the last two weeks.

"You don't have to tell him right away, take your time to process, you decide when you want to fill him in on the rest, if ever."

"I can't keep that from him, he deserves to know how disgusting I am."

"You are not, Rosemarie." He moved closer to the bed, "Look at me! Nothing that happened was your fault, therefore, it does not make you disgusting or worthless. It makes you strong, because you fought and you made it out. It makes you a survivor. Dimitri will understand, he loves you, he won't turn his back on you for anything. The only reason I say you do tell him, is simply because those events, they will bother you for some time. He needs to know, only to not do something to trigger those memories."

I understood his logic, but how am I supposed to tell my husband about another man defiling me. Would he ever kiss me again, knowing what passed my lips? I was grateful that he never went beyond that, being off my birth control and my cycle getting thrown out of whack is the only reason he didn't get further. If he had, I am sure Dimitri would never feel the same toward me. He is the only man I ever wanted to do anything with, now that has all changed, even if it wasn't by choice, it still happened. Will he be able to forgive that, look past it and still love me?

I nodded my head and laid back on the bed again. I wanted nothing more than to fall asleep and wake up to find this was all a dream, a nightmare. That wasn't going to happen though, it was all real, very real and I had to get through it.

I knew my father would never abandon me, there was no doubt in my mind about that. However, I worried that Dimitri would, I know, I know, I shouldn't, but I do. After Jesse, he was there, only, this time things are different. Jesse didn't get the chance to assault me, Ben did. Then add on the fact that I murdered him, even if it was a him or me situation. Would that matter to him? Would he see me differently after receiving the knowledge of what occurred in that cabin? I would never doubt that he would still love me, just that he wouldn't be able to look me the same way.

With that last fleeting thought, I drifted back into the dark abyss.

Authors Note:

Sorry it took an extra day to get this up, work has been crazy and I have had my two oldest nephews occupying my time at home. Thank you for all the new favorites and follows over the last few chapters. Also the reviews, we are almost at 150! Can we make it before the next chapter comes out?

Song used: Forever Girl by Jon Langston- I don't own that either