Okay - MATURE content in this chapter. Not just a little; it is explicit, so if that is upsetting to you, please do not read this one. Instead, you are welcome to send me a note and I will edit it and send you a different copy. That way you can maintain the storyline, just without some of the really graphic details.

Chapter 34 – Will It Hurt?

All three vampires held stock still, staring at me. I found their expressions funny. Rarely had I shocked three vampires – especially these three – into abject silence. I waited, figuring at least one of them would come to their senses soon.

Finally, Myrnin managed – with some difficulty – fighting against what he desperately wanted, versus what he thought the right thing for me was, "You know I am willing...when you are ready. But I don't want you to make this decision because you feel threatened."

I almost rolled my eyes again. "How many times have I been threatened since arriving in Morganville?" I asked him, knowing the answer had to be in double if not triple digits, and continued without waiting for a response, "—and out of all of those times, I never once wanted this." I looked into Myrnin's love filled eyes, my heart glowing when he looked at me like that and whispered, "I'm...ready."

"Cariad..." he whispered, his eyes wide.

I smiled. At least he was back to using my term of endearment properly. This would definitely qualify as an intimate moment of love.

Myrnin looked at Amelie.

"I will help if you need it," she murmured.

"Hold on," Oliver interjected, "While I think it is about time she came to this decision, will the timing make it impossible? Is she going to be able to turn and then submit so completely and soon to him, enough to do this transfer? New vampires can be less than predictable in their behavior."

"I can get her there," Myrnin replied, completely focused, and then smiled slightly, "as long as you don't care too much about our damaging any of your furnishings."

I blushed crimson.

Oliver sat back in his chair and smirked expectantly, "This should be interesting."

Myrnin's intensity was a little breathtaking. "We'll need two, no...get four pints of blood, just in case." Oliver nodded and reached back for a phone on the desk behind them.

"Could we do this...privately?" I blushed, thinking about having an audience.

Amelie nodded and replied, "There is a spare room at the end of the hall on the left that you can use. I will have the blood brought to you."

Myrnin took my hand and led me down the hall. My heart was beating out of control, an almost solid thrum. We entered the room and he closed the door quietly behind us, without turning on the light. The moonlight shone through the sheer curtains. My eyes adjusted to the dimness enough to be able to look around. The room was quite luxurious. It had a large intricately carved bed that took up most of one corner, with fine linens in cool blue tones. There was a sitting area across the room with a desk, couch and two comfortable looking upholstered armchairs. A beautiful chandelier hung elegantly from the ceiling.

There was a brisk rapt on the door, making me jump. "Shh...it's okay, love. It's just the blood." Myrnin went to the door, accepted the packages and set the blood on the nightstand. I wrinkled my nose, not particularly excited about that part of the process. Myrnin noticed my reaction and smiled softly, "By the time you have to, you will want to."

Suddenly, I was scared and looked at Myrnin with wide eyes. "Will it hurt?" I whispered.

"Cariad, I will do it as quickly as possible. It isn't pleasant, but it won't last long," he spoke firmly, but I could sense the anxiety behind his words. "Come," he climbed on the bed and sat, resting against the headboard. I followed him. He turned me, so that I was sitting between his legs, my back against the solid wall of his chest. I looked over my shoulder up at him, and searched his eyes as I whispered, "Will you be able to stop?"

His tone was fierce as he replied, "Cariad, you are everything to me now. I would sooner die than hurt you. I can do this," he spoke with such certainty. I relaxed in his arms. He gently slid the hair off of my neck and before I realized it, slid his fangs deep into my neck. I cried out and struggled, shocked at the pain of the bite. His steel arms kept me locked in place. Quicker than expected, the initial shock and pain in my neck began to fade, and my brain started to feel fuzzy. I stopped struggling in his arms. I felt so incredibly tired and idly thought in the back of my mind, my utter exhaustion meant I was dying. But, I knew that would happen. I was well aware of how a vampire was created. First, I needed to be drained to the edge of death, and then Myrnin would use his blood to bring me back. I smiled a lazy smile, thinking that it would be his blood that would change me, running through my veins. My vision was dark. My thoughts slowed down and finally stopped all together.

Suddenly, my peace and calm were shattered by a searing liquid being forced down my throat. I thrashed, trying to make sense of what was happening to me. How did I get here?! Who was holding me down?! My panicked thoughts were abruptly silenced as a new sensation filled me. I was burning. From the inside out. I tried to scream, but something was clamped over my mouth. I gagged and sputtered as the liquid burned a trail down my throat, making it impossible to catch my breath. The fire consumed me. Shock and pain were all that I knew. Time seemed to stand still while I groaned in agony, still unable to scream around whatever was gagging my mouth. Tears streamed down my face. I wished I had died now. A moment ago, there was blissful quiet and peace. Now, all I could feel was torment, writhing hopelessly against the immovable force surrounding my body.

As abruptly as my suffering began, I started to sense a gradual decrease. Ever so slowly, the pain seemed to recede. I started to think rational thoughts again. With a jolt, I remembered why I was here and what I was doing! The burn was slowly receding and I felt an unnatural strength building in my muscles, coiling through my body. I stopped fighting against the gag on my mouth. Instead, my hands clamped around the arm held to my lips and sucked greedily. Too quickly, the delicious liquid was pulled away from me and I fought to keep it; my fangs tearing through lush skin as it was forced away. I heard someone hiss behind me, and every nerve ending in my body responded to him. I knew that voice. Myrnin! I tried to turn, but the incredible burn in my throat began. This time it wasn't burning me painfully. This time, I realized, I was thirsty! I pushed against the restraints holding me, intent on finding something to quench this new hunger inside of me.

His voice hit me firmly, "Cariad, no!" I froze, knowing I could trust his voice. In the next instant, a bottle was forced to my lips. It wasn't nearly as good as before, but I craved it. I gripped it tightly, draining it within seconds and whimpered for more. Immediately another bottle was against my lips and I responded just as eagerly, but began to slow down, as I started to feel satisfied. After finishing the third bottle, I finally rejected the fourth and slumped back peacefully against his chest. I was completely aware now. Myrnin was stroking my hair and whispering an almost non-stop stream of syllables of love and encouragement.

Myrnin gently pulled my head to the side, inspecting the newly healed bite. He leaned down and ran his tongue along the veins in my neck. Immediately, lust-filled adrenaline shot through my system, searing hot and strong. The strength of it took my breath away. I panted to regain control. He smiled against my neck and murmured silkily, "I thought you might respond like that."

"Like what?" I whispered a bit hoarsely, trying to keep the tingling between my legs from making me lose my mind. I squirmed.

He chuckled and ran his hand around my belly and down until he found the heat in the apex between my thighs. "Like that," he growled low, his own desire rising to the surface.

I pictured myself straddling him, and was shocked when my body immediately flipped around effortlessly, and I landed, sitting astride him. I inhaled sharply, distracted by my own foreign reactions, my eyes wide with anxiety as I stared down at my body.

Myrnin brought both hands up to cup my face. I couldn't look at him yet and closed my eyes, just feeling his touch. His hands felt so soft against my skin, I nudged my cheek against his fingers, letting the warmth and comfort of his touch fill me. It was then that I dared to look into his eyes. I thought I was prepared for the emotions I would feel when I looked at him for the first time with my new eyes. But I am not sure if anything could have truly prepared me for this.

His dark liquid gaze burned into mine, silently me promising me every part of him. He was shockingly beautiful, now that I could see him in crystal clear clarity. I was stunned and speechless. "Cariad," his words caressed me, making every nerve in my body sing. I thought I loved him before. But now...now...the overwhelming force of my emotions choked me, making it impossible to speak around the lump in my throat.

"I know," he murmured, as if reading my mind. His eyes were fierce with love and joy. He leaned into me and ghosted his lips over mine, just a whisper of a touch. But enough to release another searing hot wave of desire through my body. Without thinking, I attacked his mouth with bruising force, tasting his lips and demanding entrance with my tongue. His response was immediate and equally aggressive, moving against my mouth with exquisite force. Too soon, he withdrew his lips from mine and nuzzled into my neck. I whined in the back of my throat. "Take your clothes off," he murmured, moving his lips smoothly across my skin.

Oh! I remembered now. Clāmāre. My nerves set in. I wasn't sure if I could go through with it, knowing Amelie and Oliver were within listening distance. As if hearing my thoughts, Myrnin's pressure against my neck increased, his tongue darting out to taste my skin. His hands slid up to my hips, and pushed me down hard against his erection. The force of his movement stunned me. He wasn't holding back now that I was considerably more durable in my new body. A gasp escaped my lips. I knew what pleasures he could give me when he was trying to be careful. I had no idea what to expect when he was free to take me without any reservation – but I knew I had to have it.

He murmured again, his voice hypnotic and demanding, "Take off your clothes."

His words and tone made the muscles in my pelvis contract tightly. Oh! I was distracted for a moment, by how good it felt to use just a tiny bit of the unbridled power and strength that flowed through me. I noticed that my muscles ached for relief, to be flexed and stressed to their fullest extent, so that I could release the incredible tension that flowed unchecked through my body. My lips curled into a small smile. He wanted me to take off my clothes. I could do that, I thought mischievously – just maybe not the way he expected. He clearly felt like he could handle me. I was eager to find out if he was right.

My fingers tightened against the hem of my shirt. I centered my concentration on my stomach muscles, contracting them tightly as I peeled the top off, while rolling my upper body and hips, grinding against him. A small moan escaped my lips at the sweet release of using a tiny bit of my power and the feeling of him hard between my thighs.

Myrnin's eyes flashed wildly. He immediately grasped my sides and brought his lips down to devour the flesh along my collar bone and shoulders. I let my head fall back. With an easy twist of my fingers, I released my bra and let it fall away. Myrnin's hands slid down under my bottom, so he could lift my body and capture my breasts in his mouth, licking and nipping with his teeth. I gasped loudly and arched my back into him.

"Take off the rest," he growled low.

The smile returned to my lips. I whispered, "In a minute," making him wait, while I reached for his shirt. My plan had been to undo the buttons, until I remembered it was completely unnecessary, and just tore it from his chest with one easy swipe. He growled and tightened his hold on me.

I purred, "You are going to have to let me go, if you want me to take anything else off." Reluctantly, he released me. I slid off of his lap, onto the floor. Keeping my back to him, I walked to the window and undid my jeans slowly, before bending over at the waist, and wiggling to ease them down my legs.

Myrnin hissed behind me. I stifled a giggle at my blatant sexual display. Okay, I had his attention. I kept my back to him and repeated the process slowly with my panties.

Instantly, he was behind me, and I was facing the wall as if I were being frisked. I took quick inventory and found that one of his hands gripped both of mine tightly over my head, against the wall. His other hand was traveling dangerously up and down my body. "Don't move," he commanded.

The power begging to be released in my body, combined with my rather rebellious stubborn streak, made his instructions impossible. Abruptly, I pulled my hands free and flipped in his arms to face him, almost laughing at the fantastic release I felt in my muscles and the shock that I had enough strength to do so. With the full force of his body, he slammed me back, pinning me to the wall. The impact was fierce. The large hanging picture, next to us, fell to the floor; the glass shattering on impact. I giggled. If I had been human, that little maneuver likely would have broken a bone or two. But I wasn't human. And his aggressiveness was making me even hotter.

He relaxed his hold slightly, leaning back. His eyes flickered to the sheer curtains hanging next to us. What was up with him and curtains? My eyes flashed. I leaned to his ear and whispered, "It isn't going to be that easy."

His lips turned up in a wicked grin. My breath caught, knowing what happened the last time I challenged him. "I'm ready when you are," he purred, waiting patiently for me to make my next move.

I held his gaze, but examined the room with my peripheral vision, trying not to give away my intentions. He had me tightly caged in, with both hands against the wall on either side of me, making a move to the side almost impossible. Without warning, his right hand dropped away from the wall and was suddenly between my legs, gripping my inner thigh. I jumped at the surprising touch. "Don't hesitate for too long, love, or you will be that easy," he taunted me seductively.

I didn't hesitate. Instantly, I spun my body to the side through the opening he left when he moved his hand away from the wall. Shockingly, I made it past him – just not quite two steps after that, before his muscular arms caught me around my waist. Flipping me around to face him, he picked me up and wrapped my legs around his body. My gasping squeal was cut-off when he aggressively took my lips for his own, one hand tangled in my hair at the back of my head to keep me in place. His lips demanded my response, as he carried me to a large mahogany desk. He swept the surface of the desk clean with one hand, sending office supplies flying everywhere, before climbing on the top with me under him.

He pulled back to look at me, his expression smug. My chest heaved as I struggled to regulate my breathing. When I could stop panting enough not to be embarrassing, I raised an eyebrow and asked, "You're feeling quite satisfied with yourself, aren't you?" I waited for his answer, my attention subtly darting behind him to evaluate our positioning, determining my best advantage.

His grin widened as he took in my expression and said, "You have far too many tells, love. What are you planning now?" I looked back at him with feigned shocked innocence. "Uh huh," he murmured, "I can see I am going to need to keep your thoughts in order too."

I sucked in a sharp breath, all too aware of what he could do to my thoughts. Without hesitation, he pushed images into my mind, delicious memories of him going down on me. Damn him; I couldn't stop myself from moaning a needy whimper. "Sit still and I'll replace it with the real thing," he promised, his voice husky.

"How can you be sure I'll listen?" I challenged him breathlessly. My entire body trembled with anticipation.

Of course, he saw through my pretense immediately and chuckled knowingly, "—because you want it too much." Then he licked his lips, causing a low growl to release from my throat. For a second I was stunned to hear myself growl. Myrnin nodded with a smirk at my response. Then he slid down me without stopping. Keeping one hand firmly against my stomach to keep me in place, he used his other to spread my legs wider. He teasingly traced the lines of my body with his fingertips, barely touching my skin. I was coiled so tightly in fierce tension, I thought I might levitate from the desk, if he weren't holding me down.

When he finally captured me in his mouth and began to move his tongue, flickering and darting along my sensitive skin, my back arched and my hands clenched down on the sides of the desk. Forgetting my new strength, I realized too late that I had broken off pieces of the desk, in the exact shape of my fingers. I cried out in pleasure. His name and I'm certain, comments about the talents of his tongue, rolled off of my lips. In some tiny little spot in the back of my mind, I really hoped Oliver wasn't listening too carefully or I would never hear the end of it. Of course, with Myrnin's tongue intimately exploring me, the much larger part of my brain simply couldn't shut up about it, and so my blissful babbling continued.

As I crept toward that edge that I desperately wanted to leap off of, Myrnin slowed down, and murmured seductively, "Are you ready to submit to me now?"

I whined in frustration.

Suddenly, he slid my body to the edge of the desk and thrust himself into me. I was so shocked, my entire upper body lifted from the desk, and I wrapped my legs and arms around him tightly. When in the hell had he even taken off his pants? I wondered. Even though the answer was obvious. I just wasn't paying a bit of attention to what he was doing with his pants while his tongue had been whispering against my skin.

He carried my back to the window. Using the wall as opposing force, he held my body in place, and gathered my arms over my head. A second later, my hands were tied together. I looked up. Yep, he really did have a thing for curtains. At least the sheer fabric was soft, but he had tied it much tighter this time. I gently tugged on it, testing its strength.

As if reading my mind, Myrnin threatened with a devious smile, "If you get out, I will do it again – in any way that I have to." My breath caught in my throat. He clearly wasn't holding back now that I was not breakable. I had no doubt he meant what he said.

His hands slid down my sides, making me shiver, before they gripped my hips tightly and he began to move inside of me. The force of his movement was stunning and shocking and devastatingly pleasurable. I couldn't believe how much of himself he had held back before. I growled aggressively, bucking my hips against him. His mouth came down to play with the curves along my chest.

He kept bringing me close, but then would slow down again. My growling increased, becoming high-pitched whimpers of need. "Myrnin...please..."

Releasing me from my connection with the curtain rod, but leaving my hands tied tightly, he carried me to the bed and climbed onto it easily with me under him. "Submit to me," he commanded roughly.

I shook my head and fought him for control.

I didn't think it was possible, but he thrust into me harder. My eyes rolled back slightly in my head. He suddenly slowed his momentum. I writhed against him, my need painful and moaned in a breathy voice, "Don't stop! Please... don't stop."

"I'm not going to give you release until you submit to me," he spoke harshly.

I whimpered, "Please...I need..."

He rolled our bodies and sat up, so that I was straddling him. Eagerly, I began to use my legs to create more friction, but his hands clamped down on my thighs, not letting me move. "Give in to me," he demanded again. "Do it now!"

I couldn't take it anymore. I cried out, "Yes! Yes! Yes!" I completely let go then, utterly surrendering my will to his. He could have whatever he wanted, do whatever he wanted to me.

He felt the shift in my emotions and murmured approvingly, "Good girl." With his hands against my hips, he slid me slowly up and down him. His momentum was steady and strong, but he held back from pushing me over the edge. I writhed against him. "You know what you need to do," he reminded me.

"Amelie?" I whispered and searched his eyes.

He nodded, "It's yours when you want it."

I knew what I wanted and didn't care if the entire world saw me riding Myrnin. I just needed release. "Amelie," I called her name softly.

Instantly, she was by my side. My muscles tightened violently around Myrnin as excitement for her bite rose up in me. Myrnin moaned almost inaudibly in response. I eagerly leaned my head back to give her better access, not caring that she would be able to see my exposed chest. I knew I would probably be embarrassed tomorrow, but right now, in this moment her eyes offered reassurances and I wanted her. One of her hands tangled in my hair holding my head up carefully. Her other hand gently slid down my arm. A small smile came to her lips. The last thing I saw before she bit me was her eyes glowing white, coming toward me intently. Then her fangs sunk into the flesh in my neck.

Instantly, I climaxed, writhing against their hold on me, screaming out in pleasure. Wave after wave rolled through my body, and then my entire system was rocked by the incredible power that Amelie infused into my body. My back arched, stunned by the devastating force of it. It seemed to last forever and I was afraid that at any minute, I would break from the onslaught. Finally, her fangs slid out of me, her eyes were blue now. She swayed weakly. I realized with a shock that she was going to collapse. Before I could even move, Oliver had gathered her in his arms, cradling her tiny body. Where the hell did he come from? I thought with a shock and then quickly refocused on Amelie. "Is she okay?" I whispered hoarsely.

He stroked her face gently, as she tucked her head against his chest, in exhaustion. Oliver looked up at me with the strangest expression. I had no idea what he was thinking. "She's weak," he answered, but I understood that meant she would be okay. Then his face shifted into his normal smirk, at the amusement of my current situation. Without another word, he carried Amelie out of the room, closing the door behind him. A wave of embarrassment ran through me and I tucked my body closer to Myrnin.

When we were alone again, Myrnin's head came down to whisper in my ear, "Are you okay, Cariad?" His voice was pained with worry and concern for me. I took inventory of my emotions and physical well-being. I felt...good. I smiled softly, a little shocked that we had accomplished it. He visibly relaxed at my response. "Give me your wrists," he murmured. I held my hands out to him, so he could slice through the binding with his fangs. I flexed my wrists carefully and then ran my hands into his hair.

"I can't believe we did it," I whispered.

"You did beautifully, Cariad," he nuzzled my neck.

It wasn't lost on me that he was still inside of me and rock hard. Ripples of desire flickered up and down my spine. I looked up and murmured seductively, "So...I don't have to submit anymore, right?"

He grinned widely. "Only if you want to," he purred. His pupils dilated completely as he began to move inside of me again. My body felt as though I were lit on fire, as we continued were we left off.

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Couple of things:

While I can't tempt you with another chapter right this second in return for 5 reviews, I will say that I will work on it faster if you guys are vocal. Getting your feedback really does motivate my own excitement for the story, which in turn, helps the creative process. And I am crazy appreciative for your feedback on the last two chapters!

Also, I know I am going to meet some resistance for Claire-becomes-a-vampire. I can sympathize with it, which is actually why I didn't change her in TSL. If you are curious to my thought process, I will share the 2 reasons I went this route here. If she was still human, then this chapter would basically be a 'repeat' of the Ties Bind chapter - we already know she can accomplish it, so not as much suspense. Also, I thought the realism would have been too unbelievable for her to absorb ALL of *Amelie's* power (along with Myrnin's) without having a much sturdier body. I tried to lead up to it earlier (I am Willing and another chapter, I forget which), so it wouldn't feel too 'sudden', but I never really know for sure how it 'reads' to others, because I have all of the background knowledge. Which is again, why I appreciate everyone's willingness to be open with me, even if it is something you don't like.

Much, much love!