Chapter 35: Things change 5 Titans sat around their table, silently eating their first breakfast together in a long time. Nobody said a word, since the events of yesterday…or the days before still burned fresh in their minds as images of a masked villain managed to slip in between them inside one certain titan's head.
And images of the destroyed, burning Theme park followed.
Did Slade…really die?
Robin almost wanted to believe it but he willed his thoughts away and took another bite off his bacon.
It was exactly noon and some of their wounds still hurt but their hunger prevailed in the battle and each of them had literally dragged their body towards the kitchen.
None of them could believe what happened these last few days…and even less that it was finally over – even if it came with a lot of emotional pain. They still had to digest what happened just a few hours ago and they all agreed that the best way to handle the pressure…was to stay silent.
Robin shifted uncomfortably in his seat, still trying to get accustomed to his old attire. His suit looked…unfamiliar with all those bright colors and it felt clingy to his skin with the cape hanging down his shoulders…almost as if it was dragging him down. It made him…almost miss his other suit.
Robin frowned – Slade almost managed to turn him over to his side using his devotion as a hero. The ex-leader managed a small smile – but it was his friends that pulled him out of Slade's grasp…again.
He reached for the eggs when his hand stopped in mid-air.
4 faces looked at him in confusion…when they mirrored his smile.
"What? Do I have something on my face?" the leader asked confused.
"It's good to have you back," Cyborg smiled.
The ex-apprentice felt warmth cruising through his body at hearing those words.
"And to see you smile – it makes us happy…after everything that has happened," Starfire added, causing Robin's confusion to vanish.
And he was glad that they were happy!
His eyes lowered to his still outstretched hand before it turned to a fist. "I'm…sorry!"
The 4 smiles vanished.
"I'm sorry for all I've put you through," he murmured, his eyes not daring to look at his team.
A short silence.
"We all made mistakes. And I guess I should be sorry as well," Raven said this time.
"You were the one that tried to talk sense into me when I wasn't listening – more or less unwillingly," Robin said, referring to their conversation while having their breakfast after Slade used him to deactivate the Tower's security.
"Maybe none of this would have happened…if I told you sooner about the vision I saw. It was about Slade trying to bring me to him…after Terra and you had already become his apprentices. And Cyborg was the first one to know about this – only after you had already become his apprentice."
"The past…doesn't matter. We only focus on the future. And whatever waits for us there…we will walk towards the future together."
Robin's words were spoken not from the mouth of a young boy, but of a grown leader.
"Really…all of us together?"
They turned to the voice and saw Beast Boy facing his leader with a serious expression.
Images of Terra flashed through their minds as she shone golden beneath their crumbling city before their eyes were blinded with the sunrise and they fell into their own pain.
And for one moment, Beast Boy had thought that she was an angel, fading into the sunlight like she had never even existed.
Robin's frown returned along with the dropping glances of the rest of his friends.
After what happened to the rock user…nobody was really happy that their city was saved and they had managed to remove the explosives from her body – a body that wouldn't move anymore.
They had placed her in Beast Boy's room after they regained consciousness and arrived back home.
But her stiff body told them that they couldn't do any more for her.
"We…will try to bring her back! We'll keep trying until she will walk beside us – until she will be part of our family again," Robin said determinedly, lifting his friends' spirit – if only a little.
They resumed their eating…before they heard footsteps approaching.
5 heads turned in that direction and they saw…a blonde-haired girl stealing a glance at them. They gaped at the girl before she continued to walk through the hallway.
The 5 teens by the table looked at each other in shock before they ignored their hunger and dashed after the girl.
The girl stopped in front of the large entrance of the tower, hearing footsteps approaching her quickly. She turned around and the 5 heroes stopped.
There was a long silence as the girl's eyes went from one face to the next.
Their faces were filled with confusion, happiness and fear.
Terra stood before them in her school uniform…and they realized that she had reached a decision!
A decision they didn't know they would like.
"So I'll guess you'll skip breakfast?" Raven muttered, not wanting to make her question more specific.
"What can I say? I'm…an early bird I guess," she replied but what used to be an energetic and witty reply was now just a bland and cheerless statement. "But I have made a delicious Tamaranian dish for the occasion of the saving of our beloved city," Starfire replied, her eyes staring expectantly back at the rock user.
She gave a weak smile. "It's not the breakfast, Starfire."
"I am aware of that but you are the only one…that gives my…dish any respect – aside from Robin I believe."
"But you still have room for some steak for dinner, right?" Cyborg asked but the girl just shook her head.
3 pairs of eyes lowered in sadness, realizing that she didn't intend to return any time soon.
"We're so happy…you're back."
Terra looked towards the voice and was faced with a smiling Beast Boy.
And suddenly she just wanted to turn and run.
But before she could make any movement she saw that the shape-shifter approached her.
She watched as he stopped in front of her and pulled something out of his pocket. Her eyes increased to twice the size when he revealed her butterfly hairclip in his palm. "I guess you…were missing this, weren't you?" he asked in a low voice before he broke out in a grin.
Her hand wanted to reach out for it…but that would mean…that she might be forever reminded of the things she did while wearing that ornament.
Her hands remained at her sides, her eyes moving further downwards until they stopped on her shoes. She couldn't even look at it without remembering her wrong-doings.
Why did she have to remember?
A strand of her hair was placed behind her ear before she looked up to see the changeling placing the silver ornament carefully inside her hair.
She didn't fear it anymore…but she felt a pang of pain when she saw how the shape-shifter looked at her with such joy…and hope.
And the others in the background mirrored his expression after seeing that she didn't flinch from the silver object.
She looked back up to tell them of her final decision when she saw the face of Beast Boy leaning towards her. And it took only a moment for their lips to meet. Terra looked in shock at what had just happened…but remembered the reason why she was here in the first place. She closed her eyes, enjoying the moment before she gently pushed him away.
He gave her a confused look. "What? Don't tell me I have bad breath?"
She smiled involuntarily…but her eyes dropped downwards.
"Welcome back, Terra!" she heard Robin say…before a communicator was held out to her.
She looked at the device before she shook her head. "No!"
5 faces fell in disappointment.
"I don't belong to your team."
"But Terra-" Starfire began before Beast Boy beat her to it.
"But you…saved us all…and didn't turn to stone this time. And Slade is gone for good. Why do you keep running?"
Her eyes met his, remembering the inscription that was in the cave after she was brought back to life.
Terra – a Teen Titan. A true friend.
"I'm not running!"
"Then what is it? If it's because of your powers…then let me tell you that we want you back…even with your powers – even if you can't control them completely!"
"It's not because of my powers…but because of trust," she murmured. "But we trust you, Terra – all of us," Raven said this time and Terra looked in surprise at hearing those words from her mouth. "And friends trust each other…under any circumstances."
Terra felt strange warmth flow through her at the mention that Raven called her 'friend' – that they all wanted to be friends with her.
But she shut her eyes. "We might be friends…but I'm not a Teen Titan!"
"If you're our friend…then why can't you come back to our team? We trust you…and I'm sure that you trust us…so why can't you be a Titan anymore?" Beast Boy cried.
Her eyes opened and Terra smiled sadly at her former teammates. "It's because…I can't trust myself!"
Eyes opened wide as her words echoed through the Tower.
"No matter how much I try to deny it…I can't escape from the things I've put you guys through."
"You paid for them, Terra – for all of them!" the shape-shifter shouted almost angrily at her.
"Did I pay for the things I did to myself?"
He looked at her in confusion.
"You might have forgiven me…but I still can't forgive myself. I can't forgive myself for hurting you," she murmured sadly.
"And what if I tell you that you deciding to forget again…hurts more than anything you have done to us?"
"Why do you think so?"
"Because I know that it hurts you at least just as much as us."
Terra's eyes opened wide at his words but smiled. "And from hurt…heroes are born."
"Terra…"
Beast Boy fought back the tears as his hands clenched to fists, realizing that there was not much he could do to change her mind.
And seeing him struggle caused Terra to take his hands and he looked in confusion at the tearful girl in front of him.
"Things change, Beast Boy!"
But why did they?
"I'm not the girl you once knew."
The others dropped their heads in sadness.
"I might be your friend…but I'm not a Teen Titan. The girl you want me to be is just a memory."
"A memory I will turn to reality!" he declared, causing his friends to look up at him.
"When you gave me the communicator you said to use it whenever I needed you. But I don't need you - none of you!"
Terra stared determinedly back at the young heroes before one by one they turned away, realizing that they couldn't change her mind.
Beast Boy refused to give up on her, still staring back at her.
"I'm no longer afraid of my powers. I don't run from myself anymore. I'm not the same girl you met the first time." She smiled while a small blush sneaked onto her cheeks. "And it's because you believed in me…even after I betrayed you. You believed that I could change…and the girl you see in front of you now…is the result of that change."
He gaped at her, not knowing what to say before his eyes lowered. "So you…are sure that you don't want to come back?" His voice was small. "I can't…" she replied and turned away before a tear spilled.
And as Beast Boy heard the fading footsteps of the rock user he thought he heard a whisper carried by the incoming wind that entered through the opened door. "…for now…"
And images of the destroyed, burning Theme park followed.
Did Slade…really die?
Robin almost wanted to believe it but he willed his thoughts away and took another bite off his bacon.
It was exactly noon and some of their wounds still hurt but their hunger prevailed in the battle and each of them had literally dragged their body towards the kitchen.
None of them could believe what happened these last few days…and even less that it was finally over – even if it came with a lot of emotional pain. They still had to digest what happened just a few hours ago and they all agreed that the best way to handle the pressure…was to stay silent.
Robin shifted uncomfortably in his seat, still trying to get accustomed to his old attire. His suit looked…unfamiliar with all those bright colors and it felt clingy to his skin with the cape hanging down his shoulders…almost as if it was dragging him down. It made him…almost miss his other suit.
Robin frowned – Slade almost managed to turn him over to his side using his devotion as a hero. The ex-leader managed a small smile – but it was his friends that pulled him out of Slade's grasp…again.
He reached for the eggs when his hand stopped in mid-air.
4 faces looked at him in confusion…when they mirrored his smile.
"What? Do I have something on my face?" the leader asked confused.
"It's good to have you back," Cyborg smiled.
The ex-apprentice felt warmth cruising through his body at hearing those words.
"And to see you smile – it makes us happy…after everything that has happened," Starfire added, causing Robin's confusion to vanish.
And he was glad that they were happy!
His eyes lowered to his still outstretched hand before it turned to a fist. "I'm…sorry!"
The 4 smiles vanished.
"I'm sorry for all I've put you through," he murmured, his eyes not daring to look at his team.
A short silence.
"We all made mistakes. And I guess I should be sorry as well," Raven said this time.
"You were the one that tried to talk sense into me when I wasn't listening – more or less unwillingly," Robin said, referring to their conversation while having their breakfast after Slade used him to deactivate the Tower's security.
"Maybe none of this would have happened…if I told you sooner about the vision I saw. It was about Slade trying to bring me to him…after Terra and you had already become his apprentices. And Cyborg was the first one to know about this – only after you had already become his apprentice."
"The past…doesn't matter. We only focus on the future. And whatever waits for us there…we will walk towards the future together."
Robin's words were spoken not from the mouth of a young boy, but of a grown leader.
"Really…all of us together?"
They turned to the voice and saw Beast Boy facing his leader with a serious expression.
Images of Terra flashed through their minds as she shone golden beneath their crumbling city before their eyes were blinded with the sunrise and they fell into their own pain.
And for one moment, Beast Boy had thought that she was an angel, fading into the sunlight like she had never even existed.
Robin's frown returned along with the dropping glances of the rest of his friends.
After what happened to the rock user…nobody was really happy that their city was saved and they had managed to remove the explosives from her body – a body that wouldn't move anymore.
They had placed her in Beast Boy's room after they regained consciousness and arrived back home.
But her stiff body told them that they couldn't do any more for her.
"We…will try to bring her back! We'll keep trying until she will walk beside us – until she will be part of our family again," Robin said determinedly, lifting his friends' spirit – if only a little.
They resumed their eating…before they heard footsteps approaching.
5 heads turned in that direction and they saw…a blonde-haired girl stealing a glance at them. They gaped at the girl before she continued to walk through the hallway.
The 5 teens by the table looked at each other in shock before they ignored their hunger and dashed after the girl.
The girl stopped in front of the large entrance of the tower, hearing footsteps approaching her quickly. She turned around and the 5 heroes stopped.
There was a long silence as the girl's eyes went from one face to the next.
Their faces were filled with confusion, happiness and fear.
Terra stood before them in her school uniform…and they realized that she had reached a decision!
A decision they didn't know they would like.
"So I'll guess you'll skip breakfast?" Raven muttered, not wanting to make her question more specific.
"What can I say? I'm…an early bird I guess," she replied but what used to be an energetic and witty reply was now just a bland and cheerless statement. "But I have made a delicious Tamaranian dish for the occasion of the saving of our beloved city," Starfire replied, her eyes staring expectantly back at the rock user.
She gave a weak smile. "It's not the breakfast, Starfire."
"I am aware of that but you are the only one…that gives my…dish any respect – aside from Robin I believe."
"But you still have room for some steak for dinner, right?" Cyborg asked but the girl just shook her head.
3 pairs of eyes lowered in sadness, realizing that she didn't intend to return any time soon.
"We're so happy…you're back."
Terra looked towards the voice and was faced with a smiling Beast Boy.
And suddenly she just wanted to turn and run.
But before she could make any movement she saw that the shape-shifter approached her.
She watched as he stopped in front of her and pulled something out of his pocket. Her eyes increased to twice the size when he revealed her butterfly hairclip in his palm. "I guess you…were missing this, weren't you?" he asked in a low voice before he broke out in a grin.
Her hand wanted to reach out for it…but that would mean…that she might be forever reminded of the things she did while wearing that ornament.
Her hands remained at her sides, her eyes moving further downwards until they stopped on her shoes. She couldn't even look at it without remembering her wrong-doings.
Why did she have to remember?
A strand of her hair was placed behind her ear before she looked up to see the changeling placing the silver ornament carefully inside her hair.
She didn't fear it anymore…but she felt a pang of pain when she saw how the shape-shifter looked at her with such joy…and hope.
And the others in the background mirrored his expression after seeing that she didn't flinch from the silver object.
She looked back up to tell them of her final decision when she saw the face of Beast Boy leaning towards her. And it took only a moment for their lips to meet. Terra looked in shock at what had just happened…but remembered the reason why she was here in the first place. She closed her eyes, enjoying the moment before she gently pushed him away.
He gave her a confused look. "What? Don't tell me I have bad breath?"
She smiled involuntarily…but her eyes dropped downwards.
"Welcome back, Terra!" she heard Robin say…before a communicator was held out to her.
She looked at the device before she shook her head. "No!"
5 faces fell in disappointment.
"I don't belong to your team."
"But Terra-" Starfire began before Beast Boy beat her to it.
"But you…saved us all…and didn't turn to stone this time. And Slade is gone for good. Why do you keep running?"
Her eyes met his, remembering the inscription that was in the cave after she was brought back to life.
Terra – a Teen Titan. A true friend.
"I'm not running!"
"Then what is it? If it's because of your powers…then let me tell you that we want you back…even with your powers – even if you can't control them completely!"
"It's not because of my powers…but because of trust," she murmured. "But we trust you, Terra – all of us," Raven said this time and Terra looked in surprise at hearing those words from her mouth. "And friends trust each other…under any circumstances."
Terra felt strange warmth flow through her at the mention that Raven called her 'friend' – that they all wanted to be friends with her.
But she shut her eyes. "We might be friends…but I'm not a Teen Titan!"
"If you're our friend…then why can't you come back to our team? We trust you…and I'm sure that you trust us…so why can't you be a Titan anymore?" Beast Boy cried.
Her eyes opened and Terra smiled sadly at her former teammates. "It's because…I can't trust myself!"
Eyes opened wide as her words echoed through the Tower.
"No matter how much I try to deny it…I can't escape from the things I've put you guys through."
"You paid for them, Terra – for all of them!" the shape-shifter shouted almost angrily at her.
"Did I pay for the things I did to myself?"
He looked at her in confusion.
"You might have forgiven me…but I still can't forgive myself. I can't forgive myself for hurting you," she murmured sadly.
"And what if I tell you that you deciding to forget again…hurts more than anything you have done to us?"
"Why do you think so?"
"Because I know that it hurts you at least just as much as us."
Terra's eyes opened wide at his words but smiled. "And from hurt…heroes are born."
"Terra…"
Beast Boy fought back the tears as his hands clenched to fists, realizing that there was not much he could do to change her mind.
And seeing him struggle caused Terra to take his hands and he looked in confusion at the tearful girl in front of him.
"Things change, Beast Boy!"
But why did they?
"I'm not the girl you once knew."
The others dropped their heads in sadness.
"I might be your friend…but I'm not a Teen Titan. The girl you want me to be is just a memory."
"A memory I will turn to reality!" he declared, causing his friends to look up at him.
"When you gave me the communicator you said to use it whenever I needed you. But I don't need you - none of you!"
Terra stared determinedly back at the young heroes before one by one they turned away, realizing that they couldn't change her mind.
Beast Boy refused to give up on her, still staring back at her.
"I'm no longer afraid of my powers. I don't run from myself anymore. I'm not the same girl you met the first time." She smiled while a small blush sneaked onto her cheeks. "And it's because you believed in me…even after I betrayed you. You believed that I could change…and the girl you see in front of you now…is the result of that change."
He gaped at her, not knowing what to say before his eyes lowered. "So you…are sure that you don't want to come back?" His voice was small. "I can't…" she replied and turned away before a tear spilled.
And as Beast Boy heard the fading footsteps of the rock user he thought he heard a whisper carried by the incoming wind that entered through the opened door. "…for now…"