Supplemental: Archival Records
Marker: Personal Correspondance From Dr. Rory Williams and Mrs. Amelia Pond-Williams to Melody Williams/Prof. River Song
Frequency: Intermittent
Provided courtesy of Mr. Anthony Brian Williams

13th of December 1943

OK. Demons Run. Why do I get all the hard questions?

I have these flashbacks sometimes. Even your father doesn't know this. I never told the Doctor either so it's the first time any of you are finding out. Mostly it's just feelings, a sensation of being trapped, my arms pinned, my legs bound. A voice, saccharine, mocking in its false encouragement. Mostly it's just flashbacks but sometimes it's full fledged memories.

Do you remember how I told you, as the Flesh, I'd see a panel open up and Madame Kovarian was just staring at me? Witnessing it as Flesh only lasted a moment. But in real time...it was hours. It was the horrible signal that they were coming for me again. I'd be slid out from that encapsulation and they all be surrounding me in this white, white room. There were Sients, Kovarian, and soldiers with their weapons aimed at me.

The first time it happened Kovarian told them,

If she moves, shoot her. We just need the child. A vegetable will work just as well as an incubator.

They did...horrible things. I spent a good deal of time with my legs in stirrups, helpless and exposed. Mostly I just remember the pain. But it's not all the time, the memories are scattered, fragmented, just as likely to come back to me as I sip some tea as they are in the middle of the night when Rory's working a late shift. Yes, sometimes I get scared but ultimately it doesn't matter, because I'm here with Rory and I'm safe and you're safe and well with the Doctor. We soldier on, like Ponds, like Williamses, like worthy companions of the Doctor.

Now, listen to me, all three of you, because Doctor, I'm assuming you're reading this too. This is none of your faults. Not a one of you could have done anything to prevent this. Doctor you couldn't have figured it out sooner. Rory you couldn't have come faster. Melody, as a fetus you were the most powerless of all. I won't have you blaming yourselves. Any of you.

Back to the question at hand and the answer to what did they do to me is, I don't really know.

When Rory and I went to the fertility clinic the ultrasound revealed "serious and deep layered scarring of the uterine wall." That's what the physician told us as we waited in that room to have our future read to us as blithely as football scores. I was sitting on the table, butcher paper crinkling beneath me, legs dangling. Rory was at my side, tiglty gripping my hand in his.

It looks to be the result of a D&C...or rather multiple D&C's. But now you want children is that correct, Mrs. Williams?

He tsked before adding, ...chickens coming home to roost...

He muttered the last sentence under his breath. I was too shell shocked to speak but I was aware when I felt your Dad's hand slip from mine.

The next thing I knew he had that physician pinned to the wall, his forearm pressing heavily on the other man's windpipe.

What was that you said to my wife? A snide comment about chickens coming home to roost, was it? You think she earned this? You think any woman could possibly earn this?

Mr. Williams...

He was trying to choke out something, an apology maybe, but Rory wouldn't allow him to take in that much air.

On most occasions, your Dad, Melody, is the sweetest, kindest person I have ever known. He is gentle personified. But ever so rarely, even now, I get flashes of the Lone Centurion. Every so often I realize the strength and power and rage and love it would take for an auton without the ability to heal or repair himself to pass 2000 years undamaged.

And at that moment he was furious. He pressed his face close to the other mans and I only just made out what he hissed

Did you know that the Visigoths and the Franks used to scalp their victims? Of course all it took to be one of their victims was to have the poor judgement to disrespect them or their family. They would slice into the persons skull while they were dying, but still very much alive, and peel the skin back like the rind of an orange. Can you imagine the sound, the screaming, the ripping, the blood? I don't have to imagine. I remember.

The physician whimpered and I recall weakly choking out your father's name.

I should take your head and mount it on my wall, but I think I'd rather have your medical license instead.

He released the other man who fell to the floor coughing and sputtering.

Rory walked over to where I sat and helped me to my feet putting a strong arm around me.

Let's go home.

You'll be brought up on charges for assault! The man wheezed.

Not a mark on you, mate. I'd like to see you try, though. Still room on my wall.

Your Dad escorted me out of the room and out of the building. And all at once he was back to the loving husband I knew.

We'll go somewhere else, Amy. He whispered to me. We'll get answers.

We went to multiple places with little results. They wanted reasons and answers for all the scarring, all that horrible, horrible damage and I had none to give. Eventually they diagnosed me with Asherman's Syndrome and assumed I'd had a botched abortion sometime in the past. The syndrome combined with the awful scarring did make one thing clear, I'd never be able to give Rory children. And that just about killed me.

I'm not telling you this to disturb you, Melody. I'm telling you because I need you to know there was one person and one person only responsible for what happened to me. Kovarian. Not you, never you. So please don't feel guilty.

Yes, your Dad and I did split up for awhile. He was so sweet about everything, so kind. We'll adopt, Amy, he said. But I just knew I'd failed him. Yet again. Amy Pond had let Rory Williams down, because that's what Amy does, that's all she ever does.

So, I started thinking about how much I was holding him back. How he was great, so wonderfully, impossibly great and he was going to be stuck in London with me, trying to make me happy until the day he died. I loved him for it. I loved every minute I'd ever spent with my Rory and that was why I thought the best thing to do is give him up. A life with me would only make him miserable. So I started planning by degrees to drive him out of my life. I was so mean, so cold to him and one day after months and months I just asked for a divorce and he was so fed up he agreed. I wanted to curl up and die. When he showed up at work to get me to sign the final papers I wanted to wrap my arms around him and take it all back. Tell him I was willing to work on us again. Try harder, be better. But I let him slip away.

Without your father, Melody, I am woefully incomplete.

Honestly, were it not for us getting kidnapped by the Daleks I don't know where we'd be. I was so glad to be back with your dad, I was so happy and I vowed I would never, ever let him go again. That's why I let the Angel touch me because I'll never leave Rory again.

That's the story of Demons Run, and I hope, dear Melody, now that you know the truth you can let all of that guilt go.

Ok, back to Dad...and then we'll try to answer the question about the Doctor together. As best we can.