33

Ok guys- this is kinda important. These are the LAST official chapter(s) of 9 Months. I know- I wasn't planning it this way, but I figured I've been so slack in updates I won't let you guys down again by having another massive cliffy- and believe me it's big. This is NOT saying 9 Months has ended- it will just be followed with a sequel ;) And I really, really REALLY hope you guys like it- this was the direction it was going to go, so I hope you're all not too disappointed...

So look out for my new story- the sequel- coming soon- and the prologue for it will officially be the epilogue for this story- so look out for the next chapter- which will be here within a few short days, promise x.

Enjoy, my beautiful readers! I can't tell how wonderful you all are- it truly makes my day when I look back and see all the support you've given me, even when I've taken FOREVER you still stuck by me- you're all gorgeous- I love you all! :''') THANK YOU! (Aaannnd...I was anxious and nervous, so I was in a rush- so forgive any mistakes :])

Carrion

In a moment I'm lost

Dying from the inside

Her eyes take me away

Tear me apart from the inside out

Buttercup~

When Cass pulled up in front of that familiar building- I truly felt sick to my stomach. So many memories seemed to flood back, and I immediately doubted myself at making such a stupid mistake at coming back here. Butch WILL find me again- and going back to my old place just to get some stuff is probably the most stupid idea in the world.

I sighed, shifting a now sleeping Blayze in my arms. The moonlight, coupled with the steady swaying of the car, was perfect conditions for him to nod off- and I was thankful. I'd rather my baby not see me at my worst- and sitting outside my old apartment building, with my demonic lover on my tail, I felt like a nervous wreck.

"Buttercup..." Cass murmured softly beside me, switching off the ignition. She turned to me- those knowing eyes wide. "Do you want me to go in for you?"

I shook my head grimly as I held Blayze closer, while gently prying his iron grip fist off of my shirt. He is so touchy-feely when he sleeps...just like Butch. He never wanted to let go, and it took a minimal touch to unlatch every finger from the cotton. He frowned in his sleep, his baby lips whimpering and growling softly as I slowly passed him over to Cass in the driver's seat. We already discussed on the way here that if anything happens- if Butch shows up, if any of the ruffs or enemies appear- Cass would floor it, and take Blayze somewhere safe. After much arguing she finally agreed, though resentfully.

"I'll be right back." I whispered to her, flashing her a brave smile I didn't entirely believe in. Cass gave me a worried look, and I turned back to give a quick glance to Blayze- cuddled up in her lap and sleeping innocently.

"Promise?" Cass prodded, her eyes wide. I nodded, my throat tightening.

"Yeah."

With that I stepped onto the sidewalk, jogging into my old apartment building without a second glance. I'm pushing my luck, I couldn't help but think to myself. I know that. The first place Butch will look will be here.

I took the stairs up to my old floor, my ears ringing at the eerie silence that surrounded me. The stairs didn't even squeak. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I made my way into the hallway- constantly looking over my shoulder as I went. It didn't feel right- like I wasn't meant to be here. I arrived at my old door and had to sigh- there was police tape covering it. At least nobody else has moved in... I thought randomly, pushing on the door. As soon as I was within my first home away from home- I was engulfed in the memories. Nothing had changed- everything was where I'd left it. My old fridge, the stuff I'd bought for Blayze (that was probably too small for him now) my old furniture and tiny TV- the home I'd set up in the hopes I'd finally escaped Butch.

I shook my head, almost expecting my old, young, pregnant self to waltz out of the bathroom. It was like an outer body experience- a completely different world I was no longer a part in. I shook myself out of my daze and set to work- shoving everything that was remotely useful or valuable into a bag. A few clothes, some crap for Blayze, any food or money (scoff) lying around... All of it I could carry in one garbage bag- hardly worth the trip but better than nothing. I closed the door behind me and was about to head back down to the car- when something caught my eye.

It was the door at the end of the hallway- with no number. The number had fallen off a long time ago, yet I still knew who the door belonged to. It was Bane's- and I could remember when I used to see him leaning against it every morning- just watching me. I could remember smirking at him, thinking of him just like a good friend, almost like a father.

I guess that's over...now he's gone and...Demonic and everything.

My curiosity overwhelmed me, and my frown was deep as I made my way towards the door, gripping my bag tightly. I pushed against the wood, and when that didn't budge I rattled the doorknob. Locked. I groaned, throwing myself against it with my shoulder. To my alarm the door flew open, and I tumbled inside.

Butch~

Matching wide eyes blinked up at me- one a faded, pale pink and the other pair a teary baby blue. Both made me want to gag. Both of those innocent gazes made my stomach churn with anger, my skin burn with hatred and I could feel myself beginning to twitch. It was like a drug effect- it had felt like forever since I held my son and seen my girl- they were mine and I had to get them back.

I fucking needed them.

"I won't ask you again." I snarled at them in warning, hoping my warning growl would get through their thick skulls. I'd dragged them in here in the hopes of an interrogation- and now my own brothers were glaring at me like hawks. "Where did she go?"

"We don't know!" Blossom snapped at me, her eyes narrowing. Her hair was touselled, and her cheeks a bright red. She still looked dazed and somewhat mystified- so I knew Brick had done something to her. That thought alone pissed me off- half of my family is missing and he gets his kicks in screwing around with her- it was rubbing salt into my already agonising wound. "I-I don't know where she'd go! Far away, if she's got Blayze!"

"SHE'S GOT BLAYZE!" I hollered, loud. My fingernails cut into my palms and I could feel my breath come in heavy pants- my heart pounding. My head was beginning to ache, and I knew my blood was beginning to boil over. "I KNOW THAT FOR A FUCKING FACT, BITCH!"

"Butch!" Boomer growled at me. I turned, and he took a hesitant step back. "Look- you gotta think calm...you can't be going all de-"

"FUCK OFF!" I screamed at him, my lungs aching for release. I was losing it- it had been a few hours now and already I was off the deep end. My heart ached and I could feel my body twitching with desire. Fuck. She's like a drug. I could feel my skin was growing numb, like it was on fire- and my body was starting to swell. I didn't care that I was changing- all I wanted was someone, anyone, to help me find her. There was a big wide world, and she could run in any directions- and I can't. Fucking. Concentrate...

"There's no point interrogating these useless puffs." Brick drawled knowingly behind me- his voice drilling into me like a jackhammer. "They don't know where she's gone- I bet she did jump, man...but I bet she fell- she's too weak."

"So what the FUCK does that mean!" I turned to him now- my face twitching uncontrollably. "My fucking girl's DEAD?"

My heart seemed to freeze up at the thought- her pale body, soft skin, just crumpled and bleeding on the ground somewhere. Her eyes- usually so bright and defiant with that bright apple green- faded to a lifeless hue. But when I looked she wasn't there- there was no body. That can't be it. Not her. Not my fighter.

"No!" Brick grumbled at me, looking impatient. "Blayze has gone too- he might have sensed she was in distress and his immediate reaction was to rescue her- and transport her somewhere without danger. It's what he does. It must be that neutral nature of his..."

"Well she's alive." I snarled at him, leering closer. "BUT NOT FOR LONG!"

"BUTCH!"

I whirled around- my eyes narrowing. The blonde had risen- and a fresh look of intensity was alighting those baby blue eyes of hers. She seemed to glare at me with no fear...somethign I immediately loathed. I glared back at her, challenging. Annoying she didn't back down. Stubborn cow.

"I KNOW you care about her!" She screeched at me, her dainty finger pointing accusingly at my heaving form. I towered over her- my face daring her to continue, but she kept shrieking in that horrible high pitched whine. "I KNOW you do! Y-You can't deny that Butch! I've seen the way you look at her, and despite how twisted you are- I know you know it too! You care about my sister! I-" Her eyes widened, and her hands became fists as she stared me in the eye- determined and strong. "I might even dare to say you love her!"

I gritted my teeth at her- my face working furiously to process those shrill cries. She still stared back at me, not letting up. I wanted to tear into her- rip her face clear in half for saying that crap- but I couldn't. No matter how much I willed my body to- my fingers twitched back in hesitation.

Cause it's true.

"FUCK!" I finally exploded, throwing myself full force into the stone wall beside me. I flew through ad emerged in the next room- completely unscathed. I didn't even feel it- my skin wasn't bruised or cut. I just stood there- hovering a few inches from the ground- trembling with complete fury. My fingers even cracked as I flexed out my fist in preparation for the next hit. I threw myself sideways- out of the building and into the fresh air. I could feel my eyes flash, and I had a sole desire flow through me like poison, strengthening my anger and fuelling my senses. I wanted one thing and one thing only.

To hunt.

Buttercup~

I looked around in slight amazement as I felt my blood run cold. I felt bad, as though Bane was sitll living here and I came in uninvited. I stared around at the nothingness that surrounded me. Nothing- just a plain room with white walls and grey carpet. Not a single bit of furniture- except the huge stereo in the corner, and the wall lined in empty spirit bottles that sat up neatly on the floor. I guess that's all Bane was ever good at- drinking and blasting music at obscene volumes. I stared around at the blank atmosphere. It still smelled of Bane- he had that unique scent nobody else could replicate. I trod lightly on the carpet, as if afraid to disturb anything. It was surreal- how quiet it was without him...

And all thanks to the professor.

Ignoring that shiver of guilt that travelled up my spine, I pushed against his bedroom door instead and stepped inside.

Immediately, I stumbled back and clawed to close it back over- shoving a fist in my mouth to stifle a scream.

The room was filled with corpses- dead, lifeless beings all over the ground. My eyes were immediately scarred with images of rotting skin, heavy, still bodies and blood- red, offensive splashes of the stuff- the very life essence- pooling everywhere, drying on the walls, staining the carpets, and sticking to bodies like glue. I wanted to gag on the image- nevertheless the smell.

My knees were weak and I stumbled to the small kitchen that stood off in the corner- separated by an archway. Once again it was bare, but my trembling arms gripped the sink anyway- my body fighting to stay upright. That thought- that probably more than ten dead, rotting corpses were separated from me by a room- sent me feeling faint, and I was trying as hard as I could to rid myself of any of those images before they literally made me vomit.

Tears stung at my eyes. I somehow then felt an overhwleming sense of betrayal. Maybe I refused to believe it until then- that Bane really was who he said he was. I could never see him as that- evil and inhuman. I guess now that the evidence was staring me in the face, I couldn't deny it now.

And that's just what Butch is. That's who he claims Blayze is.

I shook my head at my taunting thoughts, running water over my face. Get a grip Buttercup...I told myself firmly. You gotta stay strong. For Blayze. I swallowed, and as I turned my eyes fell on a pile of books on the counter. I frowned, running my finger along the hardcover. There was a symbol on the front I couldn't recognise- like a faded star. The book looked old, with yellowing pages and a wilted cover- but I still opened it, and my lips fell agape at the words I saw.

"Demonology?" I read out loud, frowning as I picked it up. "There's...a way to fight these guys?"

I heard a noise in the hallway and my heart leapt into my throat, almost dropping the book in the process. Without a second thought I shoved the book into my bag, and in one movement I'd slipped the rest of them in there too. I threw it over my shoulder and ran out- staring straight ahead.

For all I knew- if I looked behind me there could be a pair of very familiar emerald eyes.

Butch~

The heel of my palms dug into my closed eyes, rubbing helplessly at my throbbing skull. It was hopeless- all of it. Even the alarming chill of the evening breeze couldn't calm me down. I had to get a hold of myself- it was too human of me to let my emotions ruin my instincts. I sat upon the roof of the tallest skyscraper in Townsville- bringing up memories of when we first met Bane. It was painful, but I had to get out of that house- it still had her scent, her things...

I have to get her back.

I willed myself to try, my eyes squeezed shut and I hoped, thought, breathed in the very thought of her- and seeing her. But every time I did I just got that horrified look of hers- or those angry eyes- or that image of her walking away when I opened my heart out to her- when I offered her something I never thought I would offer anyone.

"Will you marry me?"

I bit my lip so hard I felt the sharp taste of blood fill my mouth. It was out of control- this wild rollercoaster of emotion I found myself on. Sure, it was a girl- but it was so much more than that. She had so many labels- my enemy, my counterpart, my partner, the mother of my child. We had so much, why was she so eager to stick to the bad labels when we could be so much more? Why? Why was I suddenly the one to beg? I don't beg. I don't hope. I get. I'm a villain, no- I'm now more than a villain- I'm a demon. We not only take, but we destroy.

A tear rolled down my cheek, and it stung my skin like acid. This was pathetic. And it wasn't getting me anywhere.

I can want the bitch all I want. My brain told me scathingly. It won't change anything. What we can change is where she is- and make sure she can never leave.

I considered it- truly this time. Usually it seemed an empty threat, to lock the green puff up I wanted so much so she'd just be for me, she'd have no choice in who she talks to- her voice would only be for my ears (and Blayze's). We'd be our own little family. Sure, she'll be sad and yeah, I guess it's against her will and she'll be a prisoner...but it's the only way my heart can beat easy- knowing she's there like a true partner would be...I'd trust her to know she'd be there...always...

I sighed wistfully, my head making up some fuzzy scene where I'd come home every day to see her there- catching a glimpse of that rare smile or rare moments when her eyes flash with emotion- happy or even passionate times that seemed rare with us. But they stuck with me for some stupid reason, just like old memories with my mum did...

I wiped at my now wet face, which stung against the night air. It had grown darker as I'd sat on that ledge, and now the stars were twinkling at me knowingly. I shook my head again- maybe rattling around for any logical thought that was still there. I was a mess, and I knew it. The only thing that would fix it would be gazing into those apple green eyes again, and holding my baby in my arms. It wasn't much, it probably wasn't even right- but I guess that's my own ideal of heaven...

And even a Demon needs some paradise every now and then.

Buttercup~

I could see the immediate relief in Cass' face when I plonked down on the passenger seat- but maybe it was because Blayze had woken up and was bawling, his nose running all over her shoulder and his hard grip clutching her arm.

"Thank God you're okay." She breathed, Blayze kicking her in the process of zooming over to me. He jolted into my chest- his movements in flying still shaky but nevertheless it showed his strength. He climbed onto me and latched onto my neck, his pudgy lips mumbling his own language. "I was about to go in after you!"

"Mmm...Ma...Eh-" Blayze whimpered at me, his cheek pressing into mine as he dribbled onto my neck. I held him close, getting him into his regular spot in my arms. Yep. Clingy like his Daddy...

"I'm fine." I muttered, shaking myself alert. Those bodies in Bane's apartment had shocked me into another reality, but I was trying hard to stay real and think logically- like Blossom for once. Who knows? Maybe thinking like a logical leader and using your brain- not your gut- might get you out of this one... My brain seemed to sigh at me hopefully, and I turned to my driver, giving her a reassuring smile as I gathered up the cash I found out of my pocket.

"I'll get a hotel for tonight." I mumbled to her. "We'll be okay."

"But Butch might find you!" She whimpered, her eyes widening. "He's done it before-"

"If Butch finds me, he finds me- there's no way to stop it whether you're there or not. And frankly, I'd rather you not be there-"

"Then WHY are you running, BC!" Cass actually snapped at me, slamming her hands on the steering wheel. I jumped in alarm- my eyes actually widening. Cass never snapped at me- but here she was, actually snarling and glaring at me, her eyes fierce. "You KNOW how much I worry about you! Why are you doing this? I know he's your enemy but jeeze! You have a kid together! If he wanted to kill you he would have! Heck- we thought there was zero chance you'd be alive after seeing him! Now he just chases you down and drags you back- do you ever think that maybe if you stopped running you could sort it out? Maybe come to an agreement? Compromise? I mean- we're not exactly kids anymore, BC. We're not defiant teenagers anymore. We're adults- compromising and reasoning is what we just do."

I stared at her, unsure of what to say. I felt a cold sense of betrayal hit me- as though she'd thrown a bucket of cold water on me rather than a monologue. But another sense tapped into me- maybe guilt, the fact that maybe in some stupid, screwed up way she was right. We weren't six anymore. We couldn't use 'good vs bad' as an excuse anymore. It was more than that... maybe it was more than it ever seemed to be...

"I'm sorry..." Cass whispered to me, her form slumping in her seat. "I mean...he raped you...I know I have no right to say that..."

"No, Cass..." I sighed, my hand going to her arm. "You tell it like it is- we both do. It's why we get on so well-"

"No..." Cass squeezed her eyes closed. "I know they're evil, BC, and I-I can't possibly know what position you're in...or how you're feeling. It's selfish of me to judge, I mean-"

"Cass." I snarled. "For once- maybe you've got something on me."

She turned, her eyes wide. "Buttercup..."

"Just drop me off at a hotel." I sighed in defeat, staring out of the window instead into her knowing face. "I...have a lot to think about...okay?"

There was a heavy silence between us, and then I heard her car start up. She headed down the road towards a downtown motel we both knew- the red neon signs shone a bright, unnatural red glow over the car as she parked, helping me with my few things as she followed me into the lobby. The hotel was nothing special, but it was all I needed for one night. I could tell my best friend wasn't happy- in fact the look she had in her face said she was nothing short of terrified and gloomy. It was as though she was watching my funeral, or something. Blayze kept clutching to me, calming down now I was there, but growing fussy. I guess he was fed up with being surrounded by unfamiliar places too. We headed up the stairs and to my room- where there was a simple double bed with a fierce, sharp metal frame. Cass immediately started grumbling about how she'll order a crib for me and I sat on the bed with Blayze, changing him. It was tense between us- I could tell my best friend was frustrated. Being out of the loop for so long and trying so hard to help, I couldn't blame her.

And I can't hold it in.

"Cass." I finally sighed, doing up the last button on a kicking Blayze's jumpsuit. He was fussing badly now, probably frustrated he wasn't the centre of attention. I held him close, rubbing his back as I forced myself to look into my best friend's eyes. "There's more to this than you think..."

Cass frowned. She looked dark, hidden in the shadows of the cheap motel room. It wasn't much- the walls were decorated with cheap, 70's style wallpaper and the carpet was a horrible brown- matching the colour of the TV set. She sat down next to me on the flowered bedspead- her eyes open and her face neutral.

"I'm listening..."

I sighed. Deep this time.

"I'm pregnant...again."

Cass' eyes widened, but before she could do any more than gape I already bulldozed over her shock, pouring my heart and soul to the girl before me.

"I slept with Butch." I said, and even when it came out of my mouth I couldn't believe it. My eyes felt with tears, and I felt like a true weakling- but I kept going. "And I got pregnant again. How pathetic is that? I slept with a guy I supposedly hate- we're enemies- and it's like we're planning a family together! I had to leave, Cass. He was a demon! An-and no! I don't mean evil- I mean a real demon! He lives off blood and violence, he turns into some fucking h-hell creature! He wants Blayze to be evil- he told me that himself. And any other children we have. I c-couldn't let it happen to my baby...babies..." I mumbled thickly, sniffling some of the tears back. It was too late, some had already dripped off my nose, and Blayze looked up at me worriedly from my lap. I hugged him tighter. "I have to try, Cass...if I don't- what kind of mother am I?"

"Buttercup..." I heard her coo to me, but it was lost in a sea of sobs, and I had broken just like I knew I would. My shoulders started shaking as I began to cry- hard and loud- I don't know how long I kept it in but it kept coming, the tears that had been held in for so long. Cass wrapped her arms around me and Blayze seemed to tighten his grip, burying his face into my shirt as I kept sobbing. All the while she rubbed my back and hugged me tighter while I sobbed my heart out about everything- all the while not making a difference, but everything seemed to grow brighter. Just that little bit more hopeful. "It's okay...you'll be okay..."

Butch~

It had begun to rain- and usually when the harsh splashes of rain patter against my window it's like the sweetest lullaby, but instead I lay awake- just splayed out in my large bed, against my cold sheets, feeling around aimlessly for where she should have been.

I wanted to cry again, but I knew that was pointless. I felt cold and alone, and there was no way to stop that except have her body pressed against mine- in my bed where she belongs. Lightning flashed across the dark room and illuminated my lonely form- my hand fisting at the empty side of the bed.

I'm not going to sleep tonight.

I sat up, my hands cradling my head. I missed her so much- and it wasn't right. How could you hate someone, and love someone so much? She gave me everything then took it away- with minimal effort. It was like she tossed me around like a ragdoll, even though I tried so hard to be the puppet master.

I kicked off the sheets, stalking off towards where Blayze's crib was. I stared into it's empty contents- wishing, wanting that they both just came back. I never wanted so much in my life. Stupid and pathetic, it was something I was lost without. My fucking family. My little baby, my stubborn girl- they were a part of me I couldn't replace, and it touched yet angered me at the same time. So...so much.

I stomped back into my room, and immediately my foot crushed against something solid- if it had been any normal person they'd probably stubbed their toe- but instead I just snarled in annoyance, and stared at the tiny obstacle on my bedroom floor with hate. I froze.

The amulet.

I reached down and picked it up, my eyes wide. I must have shoved it aside in anger when I found out where she must have been- thrown it on the floor without another thought. But this came from Bane- my Dad. To my own baby- my own son.

I fingered the cool, sleek stone in my hands, hoping and praying that maybe- just maybe- this might be the key to getting a connection back- back to my baby Blayze...to where she would be right beside him.

I sat back on the bed and pushed it against my forehead, trying as hard as I could to tap into those lost thoughts.

Buttercup~

I sat in the itchy sheets, the heavy book open in my lap and the annoying light above me flickering as I attempted to read. It was thundering outside, and every now and then lightning would flash across the sky, causing the lights to flicker. Cass had left an hour ago- I pretty much pushed her out of the door. She had her own life and her own worrying family, and the last thing I wanted was to put her in danger. I had to hand it to her though, she fights just like me. She was there, she patted my back and smiled and told me everything will be okay- and I know she meant it. She didn't care I was pregnant, didn't care what I said or did- she was my best friend, no matter what. But it was sad to see her go- like the last pillar I could lean on. Just me and Blayze now... In a lonely hotel room surrounded by a thunderstorm.

The rain didn't help matters, and as soon as I put Blayze down in the rickety old crib they sent up he was wide awake- pining and whining for cuddles. So he was in my lap too, and I absentmindedly was stroking his soft hair as he drifted off in my arms again.

I looked down at him as I felt his steady breaths against me. He still looked so innocent, even though he was getting so big. It didn't hurt so much that he looked so much like Butch- especially when he was asleep and I couldn't see those familiar apple green eyes. In fact, it was something I'd grown to love about him...and I wasn't sure how to take it. The fact he reminded me of Butch- the way Butch smiled, smirked, even the way he twitched when he was annoyed...they were all traits that once made me ill now gave me a warm, homely feeling.

Maybe it's because we share a bond nobody else has ever given me- the fact we share a beautiful baby...he's given me that. And we've grown together, been through it like nobody else has... I can't fucking believe it...

I tried my best to get back into the book in my lap. It was fascinating- already I wasn't sure what to believe. Already the book transcribed how exactly to kill demons, where they go when they 'die' and the different levels. It was pretty cool- but again a whole new world. And I was more content with stroking Blayze. I sighed, keeping those lone facts in mind when I snapped the book shut, cradling Blayze in my lap. The thought wouldn't go away. Not so much that I loved Butch...but...

I miss him.

I missed my kidnapper- the guy who raped me, who made my life hell! Who was Hell-bent on making my baby evil! I missed him!

I snuggled my face into Blayze's. I couldn't hide it, I couldn't deny it. I was stupid, crazy, and just plain fucked up...

I love him.

"Oh, my."

I jumped, my heart leaping into my throat and then falling, sinking into the churning depths of my stomach as my eyes leapt towards the sudden noise- and Butch stood at the other end of the room, the long chain of the amulet dangling from his hand.

His eyes flashed to a horrible, sickly black- and his lips curled into a quick sneer as he glared at me.

"Ain't this fucking precious?"

It felt as though the amulet had overcome my senses, if anything. It still had the scent of Blayze on it- and Buttercup had been the last to touch it. Even that, it had some power- even I could tell just by the way it heated up in my hand. I found my familiar senses returning, and the boost of power was just enough to send me soaring into finding her trail- tracking her down. And then there I was- standing in the middle of a dirty hotel room and seeing my girl cuddling my baby- the two looking incredibly fucking cosy without me.

"Ain't this fucking precious?" I hissed at her, my teeth now gritted and my fists tightening. I couldn't help it- and when those doleful apple green eyes gazed up at me innocently, looking so tired and helpless, that only made me angrier. I stomped over to her- leering over her with what I hoped was a demanding expression. "I hope you have a fucking good reason for leaving me, Buttercup." I snarled, my voice now raspy and forbidding. She stared back, those eyes blinking slowly.

"Butch..." She mumbled softly, and I had to hold back from sinking into it. Just hearing it again, that soft coo, gave me such a comfort- and it made me feel slightly sick to know that I was addicted to this bitch. I shook my head and bared my teeth at her. Thankfully, she closed her mouth and just looked fearful- cuddling my sleeping baby closer to her chest. Those lips seemed to tremble with worry, and I shoved back the urge to kiss her. It took me fucking forever to find this little runaway bitch- and now I've got her I can't let her escape again. I just can't.

She'll destroy me.

I knew he was there- I could recognise his voice anywhere. And even when his voice alone sent frightened chills all over my body, his very presence made my stomach droop and my throat tighten with the mere memory of the terror he could inflict- I just sat there, calm and serene...as if I was expecting him.

I guess I am.

I cradled Blayze close- my calm exterior reflecting nothing on the raging panic that soared within me. My heart raced in my chest and I was positive it was beating so hard Blayze could feel it. The lights were flickering, but I felt strangely heavy with dread and somehow...guilt...when I heard him stomp over- and I knew if I tore my gaze away and looked towards him, he would be livid.

Fear was thick within me, and I knew in my heart when Butch was angry he lashed out before thinking- and the trait was only worsened with his new demonic side. It seemed that whenever those eyes darkened, it was an ominous sign that a whole new Butch would come out to play- and it was never going to be fun to be on the receiving end of that.

I could hear his steady, rough pants- and I knew he was holding back on his anger for now. Cass' words rang through my head mockingly, and my stomach churned with dread.

"WHY are you running, BC!"

I hung my head. It was stupid to run. It was stupid to think I could have my life, my baby, all to myself. Maybe I was just ignorant and selfish. What was I thinking? I left my sisters behind to live my life. The life I was trying to escape I just put on them. Despite everything I should make it work- at least I had them. At least I had my baby...my babies. A slight nudge within my lower stomach reminded me of that fact. I had more to protect than myself, and running away won't ensure any more protection than staying away will...especially when he finds me no matter what.

Maybe I should just accept that maybe my childhood enemy has backed me into a corner I can't get out of this time...

"You..." Butch's voice reached my ears- his growl low and rough against my ear. He was leaning close- I could feel his breath frosting my cheek. "I warned you. I told you. If you leave me again, Buttercup-"

"I know..." I had to sigh, finally defeated. I looked up at him, and my lips tightened as I saw him leering over me- looking just as furious as he did when he woke up, when a couple of hours ago he'd actually asked me to marry him. "I know Butch. Look...you found me again, okay?" I slid my legs out from under the heavy, scratchy sheets and bundled Blayze up with me. He didn't move as I stepped out of bed and brushed passed him, Blayze now wrapped in a blanket. I put him into the borrowed crib, and as I whirled around I saw the Ruff had followed me- using his slight height advantage to lean over me threateningly- pushing his face into mine with those narrowed eyes. I held strong, swallowing hard as I willed my heart to slow down. "I know...okay?"

"No, you don't know." Butch sneered at me automatically, looking as though he was close to flying into a rage. I found myself wishing he wouldn't- and I put a hand on Blayze's crib behind me protectively. He gritted his teeth- looking ready to bite my head off. "You don't know fucking anything Buttercup! I'm fucking in charge here and it's fucking insulting that you keep backing out on me! All I ask for is one fucking thing and you can't do it!"

"Calm down..." I mumbled to him, casting a weary look over my shoulder at Blayze's innocent sleeping form. The last thing I wanted was Blayze fussing over his parents fighting. But as I turned back, a strong cold sinking feeling captivated me, and looking into Butch's twitching eyes I knew that was an impossible feat.

"Calm down?" He hissed to me, almost spitting in my face. I gripped the crib harder. "calm down? Calm down!" He leaned over me, grabbing at my shirt and pulling me so I was pressed against him, so he was snapping in my ear. "I ask the mother of my FUCKING child to marry me and be with me, I pour my FUCKING heart out to you and you run away from me and you expect me to calm DOWN?" His grip tightened, his teeth were bared- my heart began humming a million miles a second, and I began to shake in the iron grip. I felt truly helpless, like a bug ready to be squashed. I tried to push these feelings aside, knowing the sick feeling in my stomach wasn't just for me, it was worry for my baby too...both of them.

Butch doesn't know...

"Look- I didn't mean to run, okay?" I hissed at him, my voice now strangled by the fear suddenly welling inside me. I was no longer looking into deep emerald eyes, but those ominous, cold pits of black. I've never seen him this mad...this unpredictable. It really scared me, it struck a fear within me I'd never known before. Sure, I'd been fearful of Butch but never worried he'd actually kill me...or my child... The look in those eyes was foreign and dead- I couldn't see the emotion in Butch at all. He just glared down at me hatefully, looking furious and holding onto me tight. "Butch-"

"YOU took away MY baby, AGAIN!" He growled harshly into my face, his grip tightening on my shirt with every word. I could feel him trembling against me.

"I know I did!" I snapped back, my hand still gripping the crib behind me. I raised my hand, attempting to push him off me. "But I didn't mean to! I'm still angry-"

"You're angry?" He spat at me, constricting any attempts to escape.

"You killed my father, BUTCH!" I rasped back at him, finally pushing him off. He fell back in alarm, his eyes widening. A sudden burst of power shot through me, and I frowned as I tried to regain my own balance. Wherever that power came from...it wasn't mine. A small gasp escaped my lips as I thought of my child...and what Blayze did whenever anyone put me in danger or crossed me. He fought back for me... Butch's eyes narrowed and he charged forward, grabbing me and hurling me away from Blayze. I did my best to fight back- I didn't want him anywhere near Blayze in that monster stage of his. "Get the fuck away from him!" I snarled as I straightened, getting to my feet. I tightened my fists, ready to fight if I had to. "I mean it!"

Butch hissed at me, his teeth bared. Blayze rolled over in his sleep, frowning but his eyes remaining closed.

"You can't keep me away from him!" He growled darkly, already advancing on me. I tried not to feel too intimidated. "He's my kid, Buttercup! You're just his mother. You're supposed to be by my side! Not getting in the way!"

"That's exactly right!" I hissed back at him, wanting to yell, scream, shout- anything to hit him with. "I AM Blayze's mother- and I always will be! Nothing will stand in the way of that- I will protect my baby until my dying breath! NOTHING is going to stop me! Not my morals, not my sisters, not my friends, not even loving YOU will keep ME from protecting him!"

Thunder rumbled across the sky and lightning flashed around the room- illuminating the alarmed expression that had sunk into Butch's dark features- probably mirroring my own. I never meant to say that out loud- how could I? I can't love my enemy- the man I'm fighting with! How is that even possible?

"You...love me?" He whispered, his black eyes swirling slightly. His head tilted, his raven hair falling into his face. He swallowed as I looked to the floor, the silence thickening.

"I didn't mean to say that."

"So you don't?"

"I don't know!" I snarled, folding my arms in frustration. The entire scene was hurting my head, and I was tired of this tidal wave of emotion forever hitting me- anger, love, hate, fear, loss, betrayal, anxiety...it was all too much and I could feel myself slipping. That, and keeping a secret about this baby... it had the power to destroy me, and all I could think to do was fall onto the floor and cry. But I knew I couldn't. I had to fight. I had to make it better...not just for me but for the family that still existed around me.

"You do love me." I heard him say, and all of a sudden he was before me again, his hands grabbing at my shirt. I jolted closer, my face flicking up to meet those empty eyes. "Then why don't you marry me? Why can't we be a family, Buttercup? It's one thing I want and you won't give it to me. Even though you want it too."

"I...I can't do that." I mumbled. I still looked down, and my teeth sunk into my bottom lip as I saw his knuckles whiten around the fabric he grasped in his fist.

"Why?" He snarled. His rough voice was muffled, as though he was speaking through gritted teeth.

"Because you're evil." I muttered, and summoning up all I had I looked up into his twisted face- staring back up at him with a determined look that I knew too well. "I refuse to believe I'm in love with a demon. Demons can't feel love."

"I can." He told me forcefully- his glare drilling into me. "And you better admit it. I'm tired of thinking I'm in love with somebody who doesn't love me."

I shook my head, my eyes squeezing closed. "It can't be that way!" I hissed, more to myself than anything. "It can't be that easy. You're holding me against my will, you took away my freedom!" I opened my eyes, narrowing them immediately. "You think this will be happily ever after? Me bearing your demon spawn? You think I'll just blindly follow you?"

"You will." He growled hatefully, that rough snarl returning as he grabbed my arms, holding me to him. "You have no choice. Stop denying yourself- you want it as well. Stop pushing me away because you think its right."

"I won't let my children grow up thinking that's right." I snarled at him. "I'll fight for what's right until the end."

"It's right to have their mother beside them! And beside me!" Butch shouted in my face. I heard a tiny whimper and knew Blayze was stirring. I made to turn away but he grabbed me back straight away, pulling me in again. "I won't let you cut me out. I want you to stand beside me when we rule this world."

"I won't let you take over this world." I growled, unable to hold back anymore. "I won't let our kids grow up thinking that's the right way to live."

"It'll be the ONLY way to live!" Butch shouted at me, now furious. "We'll take over and they'll be proud of their demonic roots!"

"You don't get it Butch!" I matched his volume, my anger heightening. "I won't let that happen!"

"You will." He hissed hatefully, and before I could jump away he grabbed my arm, squeezing painfully hard. "You won't leave again. That's a fucking promise."

"I will." I snarled back, my teeth firmly gritted. "I won't let any of my family be forced into evil. So what makes you think I will be?"

His grip was hard, and he was dragging me forward, but I held my ground. I knew my heart pounding painfully wasn't just from fear- it was true heartache too. Looking into those black eyes I found myself wishing back to when we were kids, when I looked into those playful emerald eyes and I could only see mischief, now all I saw was evil. This wasn't Butch, and whoever had overtaken him I wasn't about to fall for. I couldn't. Not again.

He looked back at me- those black eyes narrowing. I hadn't moved, and I wasn't about to.

"I'm not going anywhere." I told him. "I mean it."

He yanked on my arm, and I held back a painful yelp with difficulty. Agony shot up my arm into my shoulder, my muscles twisting and my bones almost snapping with the force. I bit down on my lip, my eyes now watering as I stared up at him in defiance. My bottom lip drooped as I spied Blayze over his shoulder. He was standing and his eyes peered over the bars of the crib. His light eyes were wide, and his mouth was open. My heart sank.

"Don't do this." I bit through the pain and snarled at him, my voice muffled through my pursed lips. "I don't want-"

"FUCK what you want!" Butch screamed at me, and instead of letting me go he merely twisted my arm again as if it was rubber, and he yanked on me hard and sent me flying halfway across the room. I slammed into the TV and my body crumbled with sudden hurt- my arm throbbing and my head throbbing. "YOU DON'T CALL THE SHOTS ANYMORE!"

Blayze's cries met my ears, and I blinked away the sting in my skull to look over at him. He was sobbing, and his hands reached out to me. I hate that- more than anything. Those desperate, wide eyes pleading and crying for me. I tried to stumble to my feet- and when I saw Butch making his way towards him, something in me snapped.

"Get the fuck away from him you fucking monster!" I hollered, using all of my energy to remain standing. I was aching- and a small thought entered my mind that I was probably concussed. I didn't care. I focused on my baby instead- and the killer before me was the one in my way. He stared back at me, his glare daring.

"He's my kid." He snapped. "And if you want him, I come with him. Without me he wouldn't even be here now would he?"

Blayze continued to sob behind him, looking horrified and pained. Tears streaked his face, and my heart pounded painfully as I took him in. He hated when his parents fought- even when he was a tiny baby...

"He's my baby. He's not your fucking minion, or your demon! He's MY child!" I shouted at him. "And he'll ALWAYS be mine!"

"YOU WILL ALWAYS BE MINE!" He screamed back, swelling with anger. He seemed to actually grow with size, and he towered over me with those demonic, pitch black eyes. "AND DON'T YOU FUCKING FORGET THAT!"

"Maaa!" Blayze's tiny baby voice joined in on the screams, and he jumped up- the air catching him as he hovered- diving for me. Butch twitched as he saw- out of the corner of his eye- and before I could blink he'd grabbed Blayze and thrown his tiny body back into the crib behind him- Blayze sprawled out in the mess of blankets like he was no more than a ragdoll. My baby's screams cut into me, and before I even knew what I was doing I'd thrown myself at Butch, clawing into him and attacking like I would anyone who hurts my baby.

"YOU DON'T EVER LAY A HAND ON HIM! EVER!" I screamed like a feral banshee, hacking into him before he had a chance to react. "YOU FUCKING HURT HIM! YOU HURT HIM!"

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME!" Butch's screams added to the mix, and as one final flash of lightning flickered around the pitch black hotel room, his hands found my body and he pushed me off- sending me flying.

A long, searing pain overcame me, and the light never came back. I slipped into nothingness, and everything went black.

It was like a horror movie, and all I could do was watch as the scene played out before me. My body was heated in familiar anger, and my blood was pumping faster and faster the more anger she caused me. Fear joined the mix- the threat that she'd leave, and take everything that mattered with her.

I can't let that happen.

I couldn't.

The anger was overwhelming, the hate and the desire for blood. I longed to take it out on anyone who crossed me- even though I knew love existed within me too. My control was slipping and I was trying so hard to hold on, but I knew the demonic side of me was growing stronger- there was more power there, and it was easier to hate and attack. But looking into that face was too much- even in my demon form I couldn't beat her. She wasn't going to do it anymore...and that cut into me more than ever. I couldn't let her go.

She was tearing into me- actually drawing blood. I was losing it. I couldn't believe what was happening, the control was slipping away and I had to make her see- once I got her home it was all going to be okay. Her and Blayze will come back. It'll be fine. It'll be okay.

The hurt was overwhelming, and all I could do was scream. She was screaming, Blayze was screaming, lightning and thunder rumbled around us and my world was slipping away. I had to grab it back- it was all I could do. I had to make her see.

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME!" I screamed at her. She was a blur of limbs, she was anxious to cause as much pain as possible and she was hurting me more than she could know...but I couldn't hold back the fury that welled within me, and before I could hold back I grabbed her and threw her as hard as I could into the bed- anxious to cause as much hurt as possible.

Lightning flashed across the room- and it truly illuminated the silent horror that I saw.

No...

It was as if it was in slow motion, and my heart slowly sank down into my stomach as the room grew cold...horribly cold. I blinked over and over, but the nightmare wouldn't go away. I wouldn't wake up. I walked over to where I threw her- my eyes widening. I could feel myself slipping away, the guards sinking and the emotion within me dying. The lights flickered on, and the girl I love stared back at me on the floor- those apple green eyes wide and still.

"B...Buttercup?" I asked, my voice a pathetic squeak in the large room.

Silence.

Blood began to pour nderneath her- staining that dark carpet. The lake of blood grew fast, pumping out harsher and harsher as she continued to stare at me- not in a glare or a frown but in a still picture of complete frozen perfection- her lips even slightly agape. A pool of red suddenly dripped from those pale lips, and began to drip down her neck.

No.

"Buttercup!" I screamed at her, hoping- praying- she'd hear.

My eyes travelled down her pale neck to her chest- where dark, ugly splatters of crimson had stained that dark green shirt of hers. And there- through her heart- something I couldn't tear myself from- a huge metal pole stuck out from under that shirt- the sharp metal post from the cheap metal bed. Blood pooled around it, ripped skin and broken bones and torn muscle were probably beneath it. My heart stopped, my blood ran cold, and even though I dropped to my knees and fully took in the sight before me- I knew not hers, but my heart, was truly ripping in half.

"BUTTERCUP!" I screamed to the world, not caring who heard. I grabbed her, yanking her close and pleading with her one last time. "PLEASE NO!" I shook her, my eyes wide. "I'M SORRY! I'M SO SORRY BABY! NO! YOU CAN'T DO THIS! YOU CAN'T!" I stared into that empty face- and she stared back at me- but she didn't reply. She didn't blink. She didn't wake up. A tear fell down her cheek, and I could feel my nose running- the pain in my chest only growing. I couldn't feel anything. Only numbness. The warmth flowing over me did nothing.

I held her face close, and she drooped within my grip. I pulled as hard as I could, and the frame fell from her, her body falling onto me.

"Please wake up, baby..." I begged her, my arms tightening around her. "Please. Buttercup, please. I didn't mean to..."

Silence. I sniffed, sobs wrestling to escape.

"I didn't mean to, baby!" I started sobbing hard- big baby sobs I couldn't contain. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Please get up. Please come back. I promise I'll do whatever it takes. I'm sorry, Buttercup...PLEASE! I'm so sorry..."

She was heavy, and she weighed against me as her body dripped with her life essence. There was no beating, no breathing, no pulse. The girl I fell in love with- the girl that took the hell I gave her- was no longer there. Hell had taken her. Just like her father. Just like my father. Just like my mother.

"Please..." I begged her one final time in that harsh whisper. I didn't want my mistake to be the end of her. I didn't want the demon within me to take her.

A whimper behind me jolted me back to the cold reality, and I turned my head to see my baby on the floor behind me, crawling towards me with those apple green eyes wide- as if she was staring at me. As if she knew what I did. He watched me fearfully- his own eyes welling with tears as he saw me.

"Mmm..." he mumbled to me, looking at the girl in my arms. "Maa..."

"Blayze..." I whispered hoarsely, and with difficulty I let her go, gently lowering her back to the floor. I grabbed him instead, pulling him into my arms and burying him in my chest. He cried against me, pushing me away. He was scared of me- just like she was. My heart thumped in agony and I bawled into him, holding him tight.

"I'm so sorry, baby..." I whimpered to him, choking up with tears. It felt so wrong. It wasn't how it was supposed to be. "Blayzer, I'm so sorry...I never meant to do it. I didn't mean to. You have to believe me..."

I held his head close. The last thing I wanted him to see was his mother. He stopped wrestling with me, and his face pressed against mine, his hands tightening on my shirt. Both of us were now slathered with blood, but we still held strong- he still held onto me. It was his little way of showing he forgives me. I held him tighter- that one sliver of sanity I had left in this world. One I wouldn't destroy.

"Butch?"

I looked up, jumping as I heard a voice. There was no hotel room before me- but I was back in my room, safe and sound, still holding a crying Blayze in my arms. Brick looked over at me in total shock- his eyes widening as he took in the tears and the blood. He ran over, his mouth falling open in total horror.

"What the fuck happened!" he demanded. I shook my head, my arms tightening around my baby as I squeezed my eyes closed. Never before have I felt so alone, so horrible and so, so guilty. The pain that sat within me throbbed harshly- stinging and biting at me. I could feel myself being eaten alive, and all that I could hold onto was my own life preserver- my own baby that clung onto me when nobody else did.

"B-Buttercup..." I rasped to him, unable to get out the words. "She's...she's..."

But he took it all in- my older brother, always the smart one- he eyed the blood, the tears, and he automatically knew. And all he did was shake his head, a grave, serious look on his face. He watched as he saw me crumble, gripping onto my baby hard and completely losing all control of everything around me.

"Butch..." he mumbled, wrapping his arms around me. "It'll be okay. It'll all be okay..."

But it wasn't okay...

Not by a long shot.

Well guys! Thank you so much for reading...I bet none of you were expecting an ending like th-

*Scoffs*

DID YOU THINK I WOULD HONESTLY LEAVE YOU HANGING LIKE THAT?

Keep reading! Xxx!