Two words: I'm sorry. Okay, please enjoy!
Stiles pushed back the plate in front of him. "Cheesy eggs" proved to definitely NOT a good idea, nor was it any better than the eggs he had forced down yesterday. Stiles took a swig of black coffee, hoping the awful bitter taste of the coffee would distract him from the thing sliding down his throat.
Tonya looked across the table at him, trying to stifle a laugh, but failing to do so.
"Shut up…" Stiles choked out.
"You're never going to get used to it. No matter how hard you try…" She giggled. "Just accept it."
"Just accept it…" Stiles mocked her with an impish tone. He folded his arms across his chest, sending Tonya into an even bigger fit of laughter.
"Come on pouty-pants, let's just get ready for morning check-in."
Stiles grunted, but got up from the table and carried his plate to the breakfast cart with Tonya. They both took an order form for the next day and filled it out.
Pancakes…? Stiles crossed his fingers and slipped his order form into the plastic box. "Let's do this." And they made their ways over to the couch to prepare for group.
The group came and passed much like it had yesterday, and before he knew it, Stiles was sitting alone on the couch, deciding whether or not he wanted to take a shower.
The phone on the wall gave a shrill ring, and Tom, the man in the brown hat, stood to answer it. "Stiles," He called. "Phone's for you."
Huh…Dad already called for the morning. "Hello?" He took the receiver from Tom with a nod.
"Are you alright?" Derek's gruff voice came through the receiver, tense and anxious. "Tell me you're still okay…"
"Derek? Yeah… Well, I mean…I'm here. But I'm here." Stiles sighed.
"Stop joking." Derek growled. "You swear nothing's wrong…?"
"I promise…what's wrong with you?" Stiles leaned against the wall.
Derek only sighed.
"Derek…What's wrong." Stiles whispered, not really asking.
"Nothing…" He replied after a moment. "I just wanted to make sure you're alright. That's all."
"Okay…well I suppose I'm not exactly a hundred percent, but we don't need to go into details." Stiles murmured. "I'm here. I'm safe." He repeated.
"Good." Derek replied. "That's good." He sounded a bit less stressed.
"Good." Stiles smiled to himself. "Did you dream about me?"
There was another pause. "You could say that."
"What about me?"
"Just…you." Derek sighed again. "I miss you."
Stiles found himself a bit disoriented by the sudden subject-change, but went with it. "I miss you too. You're still coming tonight right?"
"As if I'd miss it…" Derek said. "I've already let you out of my sight once and look where that got you."
"Jeez, I end up in the hospital one time and the guy already has me on a chain…" Stiles jabbed.
"I think we both know that it was a little more than a simple trip to the ER, Stiles…" Derek growled.
"Can we not?" Stiles sighed. "Can we just not talk about this? I'm fine." He emphasized the last word.
"Alright…I'm sorry." Derek resigned. "I'm just…worried. That's all."
"I know…" Stiles was sorry. He knew that things hadn't been a joy ride for anyone, and it was mainly his own fault. "I'm sorry."
"I love you." Derek replied, not looking for any mere apology, because none needed to be given.
"I love you too sourwolf." Stiles chuckled and felt his shoulders relax.
"I'll see you tonight, okay?"
"Can't wait." Stiles replied, wishing the time had already come.
The two had bid their goodbyes, and the call ended. Stiles placed the receiver back on its holster and stepped away from the little nook on the wall.
"Everything okay?" Tonya came up beside him.
"I think so," His shoulders shrugged. "Derek's just being a bit weird."
"Well I don't blame him." Tonya said pointedly. "But only because we aren't really the most stable human beings at the present moment." She defended. "He's worried about you. I could tell from just one look at his face that it's not just you or the world anymore. You're his world."
"That's really cheesy." Stiles snickered. "OW!"
"And given the circumstances, I'd say that he's terrified of losing you again." She retracted her hand from smacking him upside the head.
Stiles took a moment to mull over Tonya's words. I suppose she's right. "You know, you're pretty good at this talking thing…"
Tonya raised her eyebrow at him.
"And by that I mean that you're good at talking and actually getting something said."
She snorted. "Well you'd think that after all the times I've been in a place like this that I'd be able to sort things out for myself. But unfortunately, it's easier to give advice than it is to follow it."
"Ain't that the truth?" Stiles sighed.
"You'll get there, angel." She touched his arm.
"What's with the divine references?"
"I'm just telling you what I see." Tonya stepped away with a small smile, and then turned on her heel. "I'm off to shower. I suggest you do the same if Derek is coming tonight."
Stiles watched her go. Angel, huh? Right. He entertained the thought for a brief spell, and then let it fade. I really should shower, though.
He turned to head down the hall. Once in his room, he made his way to the bathroom where he again caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. His eyes trailed down his bandaged arms, and his hands did the same as he searched for a way to undo the bandages. After a brief pause, he left the bathroom and returned to the common room.
Andrea was sitting behind the front desk, so Stiles made his way over to her.
"Hi honey, you doin' alright?" She smiled, looking at him from the computer screen.
"Um…. Yeah. Listen, I was wondering if I could take a shower….and….if you wouldn't mind helping me undo these?" Stiles gestured bashfully to his arms and torso.
"Absolutely, pumpkin." She nodded. "Let me just log off here…there we go…alright." She stood and came from behind the desk. "Let's get you some fresh scrubs while we're here." Andrea paused and opened a closet right before the hallway. She pulled out a large white towel and some scrubs.
"Thanks." Stiles smiled as they entered his room, and then his bathroom.
"Alrighty, shirt off please." Andrea told him.
Though the bandages made it rather difficult to stretch above his head, Stiles eventually removed the garment so all that remained were his scrub pants and bandages. Andrea moved to stand behind him; Stiles could feel her fingertips run along the seams of the wrapping, searching for the start of the bandage.
"Ah, here we go". She found her mark, and gave it a gentle tug. "This might feel a bit strange. I've been told they had to stitch some of your wounds…so they might be a bit snagged." Her voice sounded in slight apology.
Stiles watched in the mirror as Andrea's hands expertly moved around his torso, shoulders, and arms, effectively carrying the bandages with them. As the layer encasing his skin grew thin, Stiles felt sharp little tugs that made him wince, all of which he assumed were the stitches.
"Sorry, love." Andrea murmured each time he winced. "There. All done." She announced after a few more minutes of unraveling. "Will you be needing any help washing?"
"No…I think I'll be okay." Stiles didn't take his eyes off of his reflection. He noticed Andrea didn't take her eyes off his skin either. There was a faint solemnity to her gaze.
"Alright then. When you shower, make sure you don't rub your stitches. Just use soap to lightly pat your body, okay? It might sting a little also." She smiled softly, though it didn't reach her eyes. "I'll be going now. Use the call button on the wall if you need anything." She gestured to the red button by the shower curtain.
"Thank you." Stiles said as she left, taking the bandages with her.
When she was gone, Stiles brushed his fingertips of his damaged skin. His body was covered in scabby sutures; the flesh around them was slightly inflamed and puckered. Stiles tried to think back to the moment he began marking himself in such ways, but he couldn't recall anything but a blur of incoherent thoughts and images. There was a slight chill, a lot of pain, darkness…but that was it.
Stiles sighed and reached into the shower stall. Locating the faucet he turned on the shower, and held his hand under the running water. After a few adjustments the water was suitable to his liking, and he withdrew his hand. Sliding his thumbs into the elastic waistband of the scrub pants, he gently let those drop to the floor before stepping beneath the spray.
The instant the hot water touched his back, Stiles jolted forward with a hiss as pain seared its way across his skin—most notably around his injuries.
"Fuck…"he whispered, panting.
It took quite some time, as Stiles inched his way back under the spray and adjusting his throbbing wounds to the feel of the water.
"She was not kidding…" he growled.
Taking heed of the pain, he followed Andrea's instructions and very gently patted some of the soap from the dispenser on the wall, hissing every now and then as it evoked quite a few large fits of irritation.
A few more moments in the shower was all he could stand. Stiles reached behind him and forcefully turned the faucet to the off position, and he stood in the steamy stall panting for a brief moment.
Reaching out of the shower, he pulled the towel in and again began to gently pat himself dry, grimacing as he did so.
Dammit, Stiles, He cursed himself. This is all your fault. Stiles hung his head. I know.
After another dull sigh, he reached for the spare pair of scrub pants, and slipped those on. Stiles looked at the mirror, which was now shrouded in condensation. Using his hand, he roughly wiped away a good portion of the mirror so that he could look at himself again. His skin seemed even more irritated and inflamed this time. Derek can't see me like this…not like this. He then pressed the call button on the wall by the shower.
"Nurses' station." Andrea's voice sounded. "Are you alright, Stiles?"
"I'm fine." He grimaced. "Do you think you could help me put a new layer of bandages on?"
"Of course. I'll be right there." She affirmed, and there was a beep, then silence.
Stiles turned back to the mirror. Not like this… Then he turned away, waiting for Andrea to help him cover up.