Chapter 36: Forgive

Remus approached her quietly. For the first time, he was uncertain how to talk to her. How he should comfort her; if she would flinch away from his touch, scarred by all the torture she has been through. Even after Sirius' assurance that she was all mellowed out and responsive, Remus was still worried. She was resting on her back, her eyes closed. Sirius had evidently removed the mud and blood from her skin. Remus could spend forever tracing the worried lines from the frown she had on her face with his eyes.

He still remembers, vividly, the last time he was actually physically close to her. It was such a long time ago but when he close his eyes, he could still see her slight smile just before she pressed the side of her face to his chest. That night, his heartbeat had lulled her to sleep. He was still puzzled though he didn't voice it, knowing she would be annoyed at him. How could a monster's heart calm her to sleep?

Nymphadora truly is an intriguing woman but she is also someone whom Remus loved very much and would love to spend the rest of his life figuring out.

He knelt by her bedside, watching her from a closer proximity and he felt a smile on his lips. She was sleeping peacefully. Struggling with the choices whether to let her sleep or to wake her for he couldn't wait to see her beautiful eyes; Remus instead leant forward quietly.

He pressed his lips to her cheek gently and found himself unable to pull away. She smelled lovely, like vanilla and like home. Remus smiled to himself, pecking her on her cheek again and again.

It took him a moment to realise she was awake. Only when he kissed her nose instead of her cheek, did he realise that she was now wide awake and looking at him. When his lips touched her nose, she froze as did Remus.

He looked into her bright grey eyes, afraid he had frightened her but she laughed. It wasn't the loud and voracious laugh he normally smiled to hear; but rather, the soft cheery laugh. He found himself chuckling in relief as he pressed his forehead to hers. He kissed her again on her closed eyelid and smiled, exhilarated as she hummed.

"I-" They both started and paused as they heard the other.

"You first," Remus whispered with a smile.

"Remus," She began and Remus felt his breath hitch in his throat; for the last time he heard her say his name, she was dead and nothing more than a spirit. Tonks didn't seem to notice as she continued, chewing on her lip, seemingly nervous, "I'm…sorry for worrying you. And before you deny, I know you've been worrying. You are Remus Lupin and you worry." She rambled; a sure sign of her uncertainty.

Remus gently brushed aside stray strands of black hair from her cheek, quieting her anxiety, "Dora, I won't deny it. Although, the last few weeks have been…insanely worrying," She chuckled before her amusement quelled when Remus merely smiled, "I'm not letting you out of my sight again, you realise that, right?"

She smiled, placing a hand on the back of his neck, pulling him down to her, "I wouldn't have it any other way," Remus opened his mouth to speak but Tonks sealed his lips with hers.

There was no way Remus can describe it. The feeling of absolute certainty and relief that the person you care about most and love most in this world is finally safe, with you. After weeks of torment, not just due to separation but also the worry about her life, Remus just felt an odd but overwhelming sense of relief. The weight on his chest lifted and the throbbing headache he has been having seemed to have magically left him.

He missed everything about this extraordinary woman; her firm but yet gentle grasp she had on his hair as they kissed, her intoxicating scent, her warmth, the way her tongue flicked along his lower lip…

Remus felt his eyes roll to the back of his head as he dwelled deeper in the kiss.

"Oh Merlin! Gods!" Sirius' loud cry startled them both. Remus jerked up to realise he was now directly above her on the bed. One of his legs was between hers and both his elbows were on both sides of her, propping him up. Remus strained to look up as Tonks continually pulled him back down, burying her face into his neck.

Sirius had one hand on the doorknob and the other covering his eyes. Remus watched, blushing, as Sirius removed his hand cautiously only to yelp again at what he saw and turn away.

"Good god! Put your clothes back on!" Sirius raved.

Remus frowned, puzzled before he looked and realized Tonks' robe and his cardigan was strewn across the floor and the top few buttons of her shirt was unbuttoned. Remus felt his blood rush at the sight. He instantly brought up the sheets to cover her before sitting up himself.

"Moony, mate! Can I not leave you in a room alone with my baby cousin for a little more than 10 minutes without you two trying to pop out a little cousin for me?" Sirius buried his face in his palms, mumbling, "Andy would kill me,"

Remus blushed while Tonks brought the sheets up higher and giggled. "Sirius," Remus growled, "just…get out…" he gestured towards the door and Sirius stared at Remus with a warning look in his eyes before sighing.

"Don't get frisky, you two…" Sirius raised a brow suggestively.

"You're not my mum, Sirius!" Tonks snapped playfully.

Sirius grinned, "Oh you're right Nymphie. I'm not Andy. If I were, Remus would be missing a few very precious and manly body parts,"

Tonks giggled loudly and Remus shot Sirius a reproachful look, in slight horror just before Sirius retreated out of the room; shooting them a wink.

When the room door shut, Remus growled in frustration, burying his face into her hair as she laughed.

"I'm coming with you," Remus stated firmly, squeezing her hand. They watched as the phoenix shaped patronus vanished into thin air before making eye contact. He could see a flash of fear in her grey-black eyes as she nodded.

Sirius stood, "I-"

"Stay here," Remus cut him off, deadpanned before they both left.

Keeping their heads low, Remus guided her to the alley for apparition. As he drew his wand, Tonks twisted out of his hold, grasping the front of his shirt in both fists.

"Remus," He looked into her eyes and saw the fear, growing, "I don't talk about it," Her voice was barely above a whisper.

"He can't force you to. I won't let him," Remus leaned in and kissed her forehead before flourishing his wand and apparating them both wordlessly.

Tonks wringed her fingers, ruthlessly as they waited for the gargoyle to bring them up to the Headmaster's office. Glancing at her, worried again, Remus covered her fingers with his hand.

"Dora, look at me," she did, "Don't be afraid, I'm here," Swallowing, she nodded, grasping his hand firmly.

Dumbledore looked older. How that was even possible; Remus didn't know but he did look more haggard than the last time Remus saw him. He was hunched in his chair, looking down at the table where his blackened hand was until they entered the room.

"Nymphadora, how have you been?" Dumbledore started and Remus winced. How do you expect her to be after putting her through such monstrous experience?

"I'm well," she replied thickly, her hand tightening her hold on his hand as they took a seat once offered.

They locked eyes and Remus silently watched.

"I know you don't want to talk about such a painful experience but death is nothing to be afraid of," Dumbledore spoke after a long while. Legilimency. Remus had no doubt the headmaster would not invade her mind like that and could only conclude that Tonks had allowed the invasion.

"No, I'm not afraid of death, as long as I'm one it has had," Tonks replied.

"Alastor's death is a tragedy for all of us," Dumbledore began and Remus could've sworn he heard regret and pain in the calm voice of the headmaster, "To me, he is an old dear friend and to you, he is no less. He is your mentor, one you have come to love as dear as a father and I understand. I know Alastor wouldn't look at you any less than his own daughter."

Tonks tensed and Remus wanted to speak up for Dumbledore to stop but Remus didn't. He felt Tonks needed this moment so instead he asked her, "Dora, do you want me to leave?" He leaned in, searching her eyes for his true reply and he saw it. Yes, please, but stay close to me.

He did as she bid but not before he kissed her on her cheek, "I love you," he murmured. Remus nodded at the headmaster before leaving the room; standing just outside the door, out of earshot of their conversation. He loved her but Remus understood that there are some things Tonks could prefer and have to face alone.

"During your captivity, Sirius went to Alastor's house; without anyone's notice of course, and found what he left for you. By accident but nonetheless, he bought it back to Grimmauld Place."

Tonks frowned, puzzled about what her mentor could have possibly left for her. Money? Knowledge in the form of books? His diary?

Dumbledore chuckled, "better and closer to his heart than any of those," He paused, looking at her over his half-moon spectacles, "He left you his past. Come," the headmaster stood gingerly and walked towards his pensieve, "I went to Grimmauld Place to retrieve them from Sirius just earlier today and he allowed me to have the honour of showing you, giving them to you."

"He left me his memories, didn't he?" Tonks muttered, "He knew he wasn't going to live…"

"Oh Alastor hoped he would but from his experiences, he knew there was little chance he could save you himself without giving away his own life. So he left you this," Dumbledore gestured to the many vials on the rack, "He went through a great headache to think about how he was going to guard them and how you were going to get them without his guidance. He went through the pains of using blood as a passcode and coincidentally, Sirius, who shared your blood, stumbled upon the passcode.

"Alastor has always been a hardhearted man but he is still human. He loved you, very much and this will tell you why." Dumbledore smiled as he took a vial off the rack delicately and release its contents into the pensieve. Glancing at Dumbledore's smiling visage, Tonks plunged her face into the bowl.

"Professor," Tonks began hesitantly, "did you know?" Her voice was quivering.

"Oh yes Nymphadora. I was there for Alastor but he didn't want any help or comfort. He wanted the impossible," Dumbledore replied as they sat back down into their respective seats, "Can you guess what the only thing Alastor ever wanted was?

Tonks pondered it for a moment, "he wanted his daughter back,"

Dumbledore nodded with a sad smile, "yes, mainly. He also wanted his family back, including Bellatrix…"

"but it wasn't going to happen," Tonks snorted, "she was gone forever and he still loved her? After everything she put him through,"

"You don't stop loving just because, Nymphadora. I thought you knew that," Dumbledore smiled, bemused, "Lyra's death wasn't the final draw that broke the man.

"Bellatrix," Tonks muttered.

"Yes, I tried to convince Alastor that staying at that house wasn't safe anymore but he refused to leave. And yes, Bellatrix came back for her daughter. She blamed Alastor for Lyra's death. Alastor was barely in the state to fight, after losing his eye and his daughter. That day, Alastor loss his leg to the only woman he had ever and will ever love." Dumbledore sighed, turning his blackened hand over.

"He's a good man. And Bellatrix played him," Tonks said through gritted teeth.

"Love is a curious thing. It can save us all but it can also destroy us. I have no doubt, Alastor's refusal to join her and his departure broke Bellatrix."

Tonks snorted, unbelieving that her deranged aunt could actually feel love and reciprocate it. In Tonks' mind, Bellatrix was just another criminal that her Auror instincts pushed her to apprehend; a cruel and heartless death eater. But Tonks had seen Mad-Eye's memory and the common look they shared was undeniable.

"Lyra's death was...it changed Alastor a great deal. He had never stopped blaming himself for it; how careless he was with her. And then he found you. I imagined; it must've been like seeing his daughter, grown up into a fine young woman, alive again. You gave him the release to finally forgive himself all these years; you gave Alastor his life back again and I can assure you, he will feel no regrets, sacrificing everything he had in that moment for you." Dumbledore smiled.

Tonks averted his eyes, feeling the tears sting her eye, "what about what I want? I didn't want him to leave me,"

"Alastor would have to leave you eventually. He'd rather it be so that he saved your life. I would imagine, Alastor couldn't be happier, with Lyra at his side again. In his time with you, Alastor has given you everything he had and whatever he knew he taught it to you. We all know it will be time soon to leave it to the younger generation. It's your turn now," Dumbledore patted her hand which was curled into a fist on the table.

"I miss him, even his nagging," Tonks chuckled bitterly as a tear rolled down her cheek, "I guess I just have so much I want to tell him,"

Dumbledore chuckled and he leaned back, pulling open his drawer. From within, he retrieved a small stone like object and placed it on the table.

"So tell him," Dumbledore made to leave.

"What-"

But the door was already closed and Dumbledore was gone. Tonks huffed in frustration but when she turned around, Mad-Eye Moody now stood in the middle of the office. He didn't have his walking stick but still had his wooden leg and magical eye on him. There wasn't even a trace of blood left on him and he was now looking at her with a fond smile.

"You're not-" Tonks almost laughed as she stood clumsily to walk around the chair, "I can't believe it. Is this even real… how?"

"I never left you and I'm always watching. How could I leave you in that place alone huh? And you," He took two steady steps to her, despite the absence of his walking stick, "you silly girl, you were never far from me, just lying there all day."

Tonks laughed bitterly, "I didn't know where else to go…"

"I would say get the hell out," He snapped gruffly and Tonks chuckled, "but you couldn't hear me, can you?"

"I can hear you now," Tonks bit her lips against the tears, "how did Dumbledore-"

Mad-Eye snorted, "Albus that old fool. He went in search of the resurrection stone I suppose. And he found it…But I suppose it is tempting to get an object that allows you to speak to your dead loved ones."

"You have no idea-" Tonks stopped herself a moment too late. He did know what it's like.

"Death is a real bastard isn't it?" Moody grumbled, "A real rift that separates people,"

Tonks smiled, "even in death, you're surly and grumpy." Moody snorted in mild acknowledgement, "did you see Lyra?"

Instantly, Tonks could see and sense the change in atmosphere just from the looks on Mad-Eye's face, a smile made the wrinkles fade, "She…reminds me of you,"

"I thought it's the other way around," Tonks smirked.

"I thought so too," Mad-Eye mumbled, staring at Tonks fixatedly with both eyes.

"Great, so now you can't use the phrase 'driving you to an early grave'," Tonks made an eerily similar imitation of Mad-Eye.

"Cheek," Mad-Eye growled. It didn't take Tonks long to run out of things to say, the silence was just so comforting, especially now that she know her mentor was here with her, "I saw how you were with Lupin,"

Tonks blushed instantly, "Mad-Eye…that's creepily disturbing." She snapped.

"Nothing I haven't seen and your mentor knows when to leave you two to it y'know!" He growled, offended. Tonks couldn't help but giggle at the thought of Mad-Eye acting like Sirius, "Lupin is a good lad, Nymphadora,"

"I know," She replied, averting his eyes shyly. This felt acutely like talking to her father about her boyfriend.

"If he ask you, don't say no. That is a man you can spend your life with and even I can be rest assured you will alright."

Tonks shifted uncomfortably as Mad-Eye gave her relationship advice, "what happened to constant vigilance?" She teased and Mad-Eye sent her a warningly stare, "alright alright! Don't stare at me like that. I would if he asked," she grumbled.

"He will. It is what every man wants and you are too good a chance for Remus to miss out on," Mad-Eye smirked.

"And if you're wrong about Remus being a goody-two shoes? If he hurt me?" Tonks teased but was taken aback when Mad-Eye seemed to have taken it seriously; his face turning dark.

"Then tell Lupin to watch his back," Mad-Eye snapped. Tonks smiled at the thought of Remus' expression if she did tell him. She sat down on the floor comfortably.

"Who did you meet?" Tonks asked.

"Hopefully you-know-who soon," Mad-Eye growled.

"He wouldn't go to heaven," Tonks rolled her eyes, "He already has a special place in hell. But really, anyone?"

"Emmeline forgives you,"

Tonks froze, her breath caught in her throat.

"Ruane forgives you,"

She felt her jaw muscles tightening.

"It's past time you forgave yourself,"

"I took their life," Tonks muttered, "Just like how I tore yours from you,"

"I had it coming, Nymphadora," Mad-Eye frowned, a sure sign of his disapproval, "

I gave my life for yours. And now I could only watch over you and, at this moment, advise you. Don't go down that road I did, it's hell. Find it in yourself to forgive yourself,"

"It's hard," she said in a small voice, suddenly feeling very young.

"I know," Mad-Eye walked up to her, reaching out an ethereal hand to touch her. She could see him patting her cheek twice, just like how he'd always do so to her in the past, but she couldn't feel the warmth. It felt like nothing but it meant everything to her. When he made to turn away, Tonks panicked. She reached out and grabbed his wrist before his hand could leave her face but she held nothing but air.

"Don't leave me," She cried, choking over her words.

"Never," Mad-Eye stated simply before he walked towards the stone on Dumbledore's desk. He reached out for it but then his hand stopped short and he turned to look at her again, "I resent Voldemort for what he did to Lyra but even in death, everyday in my dreams, I killed Greyback and Voldemort a thousand times over for what they did to you, my daughter,"

"I love you, Dad," She whispered through her tears as Mad-Eye touched the stone at his fingertips. He began vanishing, his body turning more and more transparent till Mad-Eye Moody was no more. Tonks watched, every moment of it.

Smiling through her tears, Tonks got up from the floor, wiping her tears on her palm before opening the door. Remus was standing there, his arms crossed across his chest. He was staring at the floor, his fingers tapping his arm impatiently. Remus looked up when the door open and he was instantly at her side, cupping her face in his hands, "Are you alright? I saw Albus leaving and-"

"I'm fine," She smiled as Remus frowned over the tear streaks on her face, "Let's get back before Sirius breaks out of there," She grinned and slipped her hand into his, dragging him to the gargoyle.

A few days later, a small funeral was held at Moody's house in memory of him. Many people, despite the danger, turned up and offered their condolences and pay their respects. A will was then sent by the ministry. It states that all his belongings, including his magical eye, his house and everything in it, were to go to Nymphadora Andromeda Tonks.

Remus showed Tonks the photo he had always kept and Tonks told him the story of Moody's past. They framed up that photo and placed it on the mantelpiece on top of the fireplace in Moody's, or rather Tonks' house.

"I miss him," Tonks sighed, placing her head on Remus' shoulder.

"We all do," Remus pecked the top of her head affectionately. They watched as Dumbledore apparated first to Grimmauld Place to attend the upcoming meeting. He had just helped Tonks reinforce the wards around the house.

"Remus," Tonks looked at him, "I want to stay here, when all this is over."

"I don't see why not. The place is well protected and it has lovely greenery in its surroundings," Remus smiled, "although, it is in serious need of a makeover…" His voice trailed off, uncertain if he had offended her but Tonks grinned.

"My thought's exactly, love,"

A/N: I'm fully aware that this took more than a month to write but I don't write every day so please bear with me! I truly apologise for the long wait! I just hope you guys are still stuck to this story and will till the end! Well, minor changes, I shall not add 'to be continued' this time! I have received some feedback about it and thought it would be alright to remove it. I started writing when I was young and it stayed since then so it could be a tinge cheesy :)

After finishing this chapter, I realise how much of a final chapter this sounds like but this is not the final chapter but a true closure for the mini Mad-Eye story I sort of brought you, my readers, through for quite a while. I hope you enjoyed it!

One last thing, I just read about the Image Manager thing that they had going and thought if any of you have any suggestions or wanna design a story cover for this story, feel free to do so and I just might take it up :) For a reward, maybe I'll send you the next chapter earlier than when I post it? ) sounds great doesn't it? Since the waits are so damn indecently long. Just PM me about it and I'll get back to you! :)

Once again, thank you to all my reviewers of last chapter, you guys make me smile like a loon! Thank you Tonks23, LoopyLuna13, paardenlaura, Furionknight, ajlover, Arya Lupin, Lupinesence, tt crews, QueenAnneMagic, Professor Pang, Sarah1996 and HammersNStrings. I love you all!