Richard Castle (RCPOV)
When Kate broke down on my arms on Thursday I wasn't sure of what to do of it; she was a woman always extremely independent and self-sufficient, the kind which you never imagined would ever be less than perfect in every minute of their life. Seeing her on one of her lowest point of her adulthood, as she told me the next day; was at the same time heart breaking and breathe taking. Heart breaking because it is never good to see somebody so strong, appear so broken and also because it makes you think about the scars that the person carries and never tell somebody. Breath taking because it made me remember that indeed Kate was human and she, just like anyone of us, also needed help to fight her demons from the past and maybe I could be that person, that would be there for her no matter what.
When she said she didn't want to make another word for her father, I felt that she was indeed trying to change, trying to break old patterns so she could open her heart for me, she chose to tell me about of what she was feeling instead of just doing it.
Being a writer, I am always looking for the story behind the actions; I firmly believe that in one way or another, everything has a story behind. We are made of pieces of story that when stitched together makes us who we are. So, I used the opportunity to make Kate open herself up for me, if she could do it, it was one step on the right direction, to discover what is the story behind the woman.
When we woke up the next day, I was sad to discover that she had to work, but I was glad that she wasn't trying to run. I was sure that Kate was going to try to find a reason, any reason; it didn't even have to make sense, so she wouldn't have to talk about what happened the night before, so I was glad that I was wrong. The time didn't pass while I waited for her to arrive home from work; I tried everything to help the time pass, until I decided that I should work on my book that I was writing based on Kate, then I remembered that I haven't told Kate about it yet; another conversation point which we needed to talk about later that day.
When I started writing I had so many plots idea bubbling on my mind that I missed when Kate came home, finding her a couple hours after she arrived. I found her on my dinner table with a bunch paper around her, a red glasses almost falling from her nose and her biting her lower lips in a way that should be forbidden because it was too damn sexy! When she saw me she already stopped the stuff she was working on and took my hand so we could talk. I loved that she was showing action, trying to work things out so she could trust me and we could have a bigger chance to stay together.
After our conversation Kate asked for a glass of water so I went to pick one for her and for me too since I needed it; my mouth was dry after hearing Kate's story. When I arrived at the room with Kate's water she was already sleep. She looked so beautiful sleeping, so peaceful, something rare since when she was awake her eyes would appear to be having a war inside them; but sleeping, it was like the world had never touched her, until you saw her words then you would see that indeed the world had touched her life and sadly, it have broken her a little bit each time they met. It's the false illusion that sometimes the sleep brings, that the world can't touch us when our eyes are closed.
It was something that I noticed on Kate's eyes after getting to know her a little bit. Her eyes always looked like they were in a battle, agitated. I am sure that you have heard that the eyes are the mirror of our souls; I never truly believed it until I met Kate; when you meet her you just think that her eyes have something that for some reason, unknown for the viewers, that pulls you towards it; but after getting to know her I discovered that her eyes showed the battle she had every day with her demons so she could stay alive. It was that battle who pulled you towards it, since we all feel attracted to tragedy.
I confess that the first time I met Kate on that coffee shop near her office; I thought her eyes were empty, thinking that the life was so hard on her that they had lost their happiness; now I see that I couldn't be more wrong. It's funny how the first impression is the one that stays although it usually isn't the correct one. The first one is full with preconception that during all our life we made for people basing our opinion on what society say or one experience we had with a person that dress in some way, and then, all the people we meet in our life that dresses like that one person you met a few years ago, will behave like her too.
Since Kate wasn't going to drink her water I left it on the bedside and went to the kitchen make something for Alexis and I eat. Not sure of what to do for us, I went to Alexis' room and found her staring at her wall, looking at it as her life depended on it.
"Hey Pumpkin, are you alright?" I said when I opened the door so I wouldn't scare her when I got closer to her.
"Hey dad" She said snapping out of the trance she found herself and turning her chair so she could look at me. "I am fine, and you?"
"I am good, what were you just thinking now? You appeared to be almost burning your brain."
"You know… just thinking about stuff; nothing too serious." She said smiling.
"Well… okay then, if you are sure it's nothing. I was thinking of making something for us to eat, what do you want?"
"I am not sure; anything you want to make for me it's good."
"I don't have any idea of what to make; probably I will do just pasta, everybody likes pasta, right?"
"Right dad, can I help you?"
"Sure, come on!"
We went downstairs and started doing our dinner; we cooked for a few minutes in silence, neither of us wanting to break the peace; until Alexis spoke out.
"Dad, do you love Kate?"
"Of course I do, why?"
"I don't know, I was just thinking about the subject. I really like Kate." She said smiling at me shyly.
"I am glad that you like her, because I intend to make her presence permanent in our life."
"Can't wait for Mom to hear about it, she will go crazy!"
"Ugh, please don't even mention her, she can hear it and appear here." I said making a disgusted face.
"Well, my birthday is near so she can make an appearance, I hope you will warn Kate about it."
"Pumpkin, I hope you are not waiting her, if she doesn't appear you will be sad. You know how she is; she appears when she think is useful for her."
"I am not waiting her, but she could come. I am just saying, she could, I know that there is a big chance she won't come."
"If she is coming or not, I don't care. I love you very much and you are going to have the best birthday ever!" I said hugging Alexis.
"You always say that!" She said laughing.
"I am the father, I know everything!"
"Yes, I am sure dad that you know everything!" She said with a sarcastic voice.
"Alexis, now talking serious, please don't build hope that your mother will appear, I don't want you to be sad on your birthday and this year, you have Kate to do lady stuff with you."
"Dad, I am not sure if Kate will want to do lady stuff with me. I am not her kid." She said with a sad smile.
"You are not her kid but you are her friend, I am sure you two can plan something to do on your birthday day, just ask her." I said hugging her tighter.
"Okay, I will ask." She said giving me a shy smile so I was sure that she really was going to ask Kate. I just hoped that Kate wouldn't mind.
I am not sure if I happy with this chapter, but here it is :) I am thinking of writing a chapter with Meredith visit, tell me what you think about it.
I forgot to comment last chapter, but DID YOU GUYS SAW LAST EPISODE OF SCANDAL? OH, JESUS CHRIST, MY HEART DIDN'T HANDLE IT WELL! AND CASTLE'S LAST EPISODE? THAT MUSIC! I AM SURE THERE IS A MEANING BEHIND IT, KATE WAS WAY TO EMOTIONAL WITH IT! ALTHOUGH I THOUGH IT WAS EXTREMELY FUNNY, I AM SURE IT WASN'T THE IDEA.
personal opinion: I am getting tired of 3XK ( i am not if this is his name, it always confuses me), I hope they catch him soon. Or will be like Bones and the Pelant guy, another one that I am already tired of. Anyway, see you guys this weekend!
If you can, please don't forget to review!
ps: I just have 3 days of classes and more 9 tests and then... VACATION TIME! YEY!