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The flight home was absolutely horrendous. Even sitting between Jasper & Carlisle, I could not calm down. As the plane taxied down the runway it seemed as though time had almost completely stopped. From the moment I found the folder in the storage locker my life screeched to almost a total halt. Every thought that raced through my mind was of Bella and our beautiful daughter. I tried to calm myself by taking long slow deep breaths. I closed my eyes and they were there. As I looked around the plane, it seemed to be at least there was an unusual number for little girls with their moms aboard tonight. Every where I looked there was a constant reminder of what I stand to lose if I am too late. Had this happened ten years ago we would have been on board a concord flight and been half way home by now.
"Son, I know this is easier said than done but you have to relax. We will be there before you know it and everything will be fine." Carlisle laid his hand on my arm as I looked down to see it; I saw how tightly my hand was clamped on the arm rest. "You have to calm down, this will end very badly if you or Jasper lose it. Not only will we be outed; all these poor people will die and you will quite probably lose Bella and Renesmee too." I knew he was right. Jasper was on edge I could see it in his eyes. I popped my iPod headphones in and closed my eyes. I focused on the music as much as I could. Carlisle squeezed my arm as a show of support. I had to do this.
Maybe the iPod wasn't the best idea. Every song that played reminded me of them and how much my life, for what it was worth, has changed for the better. I was starting to get frustrated. I sat with my eyes shut and tried to count backwards in twos from one million just to keep myself preoccupied. A variation of a trick I learned from Alice. I wasn't two minutes into it and couldn't stand it anymore. As soon as the seatbelt light went off I jumped up and made my way to the restroom. I closed the door behind me and locked it. I knew Carlisle was really starting to worry and between the two of us I was afraid all that negative energy would push Jasper over the edge. I stood in front of the small mirror above the sink I could see the monster behind my eyes pushing the blackness into my eyes. The sight was horrifying. I had to control it. I turned on the cold water and splashed it on my face; it actually felt warm against my skin.
I could tell Carlisle was getting nervous. I pulled myself together and found my way back to my seat. I felt the nervous stare of my father and brother following me, all the way from the restroom to the seat. As I sat down I felt a small wave of calmness wash over me. I must really be high strung.
"How are you holding up?" the look of concern in Carlisle's face was proof that he too could see the monster behind my eyes.
"I will make it off this plane; I just hope I don't lose it when we are on the ground." I tried to offer reassurance to Carlisle, he didn't buy it. I kept shifting in my seat, I couldn't get comfortable. I needed to hear Bella's voice; to be sure she was alright. I leaned forward and picked up the air-phone, I swiped the card and dialed. The phone crackled and then I heard it ring, "please Bella pick-up," I mumbled to myself. After the 4th ring I heard a soft, sweet voice on the other end, "Hi Daddy! Are you almost home?"
"Almost, I can't wait to see you. I miss you." I felt the monster finally start to retreat. "What is Momma doing?"
"She is standing here telling me to hurry up with her hand out, uh oh, bye Daddy I love you." I chuckled. "Edward, where are you?" Bella sounded upset. Not having any experience around children what so ever, I have quickly learned that they are completely honest; some times too honest.
"In the air still, I had to hear your voice. Is everything alright?" I tried to remain calm as I waited for her answer. I had already imagined ten different scenarios in my mind.
"Edward everything is fine, Emmett, Alice, Esme and Rose are here with us as well as Jacob." I honestly knew everything would be ok, but still there is always that little bit of doubt that rings out. Besides I think Alice would see if anything bad were to happen to Bella or Nessie. "You don't know how relieved I am to hear everything is quiet there." I closed my eyes took a deep breath and exhaled.
Bella laughed delicately, "I wouldn't really say things are quiet, Jake and Rose have been trading insults for the last hour. Emmett is just aggravating them and making it worse."
"Oh, I am so sorry to hear that." It amazed me completely how much our lives have changes with the addition of Bella, Nessie and Jacob. When we are all together it seemed like our home was surrounded with a controlled chaos. Looking back our lives before Bella were so mundane. "How has school been this week?"
"Boring, I did get an email from Codi, you know the girl who tripped at school…"
"Oh, the twin of your mortal self?" it still made all of us laugh how Bella found someone who is exactly like she was, only not in constant danger like she seemed to be.
"Funny, mortal twin – she had to withdraw for the semester and she will be back for the next one. She is worried she will lose her scholarship money." I had a good idea where she was going with this and I thought it is a wonderful idea.
"If she does, we can help her out Bella. I bet there is a scholarship fund that will assist her, I have a connection at the Pacific Northwest Trust." I had wondered if she would remember the name.
"Really? They offered me a scholarship once. I turned it down. It seemed shady; I thought Charlie was laundering mob money at first."
I couldn't hold back, I bust out laughing. I think it caught Carlisle and Jasper off guard and freaked them out. "Bella, you are something else."
"I can't wait until you're home. I miss you." I heard the sadness in her voice.
"I'll be home soon. I love you." The anxiety of her safety was replaced by a longing for her.
"I love you too." I pressed the end button and hung up the phone. Without saying a word I sat back, turned on my iPod and closed my eyes. It was somewhat easier to get lost in the music. The short remainder of my flight home went by quickly. Before I knew it the plane shook and I felt the shutter when the wheels hit the runway. I let out a sigh of relief, almost there.