A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, alerts, and favorites!
Christmas week, New Years, family drama, and a bad cold. You get it lol. I am so sorry this is late!
A big thank you to DieZeitVergeht!
Enjoy...
Chapter 35: One Step forward, Two Steps back
Santana mischievously smiled into her pillow and readjusted herself in bed. It was pitch dark except for the orange glow emanating from the street light that stood just outside their brownstone. It illuminated the room just enough at night, and it oddly always added to the ambiance when things got steamy. And that's all that was on Santana's mind at the moment. She glanced at her nightstand clock; it was a little past eleven at night. Brittany had started the Swan Lake rehearsals with Eva in Downtown Brooklyn two weeks prior, and three days a week she would get home late.
Santana double checked the crafty placement of the sheet to make sure it was pooled around her hips so Brittany could see that she was sleeping topless, and only in her favorite panties. She was serving herself up, but at the same time wanted it to look natural as possible. Santana wasn't sure if it was the sudden power that came along with being Eva's second chair on a prestigious project, or the fact that dancing and choreographing classicly strict ballet numbers made Brittany want to let loose afterwards. But it seemed three days a week she was always coming home and ravishing Santana before taking a shower and passing out for the night. She grinned into her pillow as the sexy memories of the last two weeks flashed like a picture book in her mind. A second later, she had to contain a girly squeal as she heard the familiar sound of the front door closing, keys being tossed, and the trudging of Brittany up the stairs.
It was a matter of time, she thought. And she was already pooling in her panties at the anticipation. Like clockwork, she heard Brittany walk pass their room and into Gabriel's nursery to check on their sleeping angel. Santana stopped her erotic thoughts and sweetly smiled into her pillow as she listened to Brittany through the baby monitor. She whispered how much she missed him and told a slumbering Gabriel about making it up to him by taking him to see his favorite monkeys at the Bronx Zoo that weekend. Santana had to suppress an 'aww' while she pictured a tired Brittany leaning over the crib, caressing Gabriel's growing honey-brown patch of hair. She quickly gathered herself when hearing Brittany whisper goodnight coupled with a kiss, most likely to their son's forehead , and start to make her way back to towards their bedroom.
Santana casually and quickly slid the sheet down more before Brittany entered. She was going to have fun playing Sleepyhead; one of her and Brittany's favorite games. She again smiled into her pillow, hiding her face. She relished the cool, early spring air as it came in through their cracked window and hit her caramel skin, forcing a thin layer of goosebumps to rise. She squeezed her eyes shut and mentally screamed as she couldn't wait for her wife's hot breath on her skin to help warm her up.
She listened and caught the faint sigh that came from Brittany as she kicked off her shoes and started removing her clothes. A sigh that was half whimpering with arousal at the sight of her naked body, and half whiny that Santana seemed already too 'asleep' to play. And it took every ounce of Santana's willpower to stop playing possum, rush up to her, and pepper Brittany's face with welcome-home kisses. But a darker part - a more naughty part wanted to be hunted at the moment. Santana wanted to be stalked and pounced upon by the sexiest person on the planet. She decided to stick with her plan.
"Ho-neey," Brittany quietly sang and lifted the sheets, sliding her body in. And In a millisecond she was at Santana's back. Her already stiff nipples and toned stomach pressed against her. Santana bit down on her bottom lip to suppress a moan.
"You asleep, baby?" Brittany hotly whispered into her ear. Santana's eyes slightly rolled back. Brittany had that rehearsal sweat smell that was such a fucking turn on, and it was engulfing them like a bubble. The strong pheromones were making Santana want to turn and pounce on Brittany instead. She strengthened her will, sticking to her plan.
"Sweetheart..." Brittany sang again, and this time gathered some loose charcoal strands of Santana's hair, sweeping them off her shoulder and neck. She leaned down and gently grazed her delicate lips back and forth against her shoulder.
Santana had to hold in groan as she felt her arousal grow and lower stomach tighten. She could feel Brittany prop herself on an elbow and could sense her wife's eyes raking over her body. She was honestly wondering what was taking so long as she was losing her patience in this game she created. Santana had to discreetly grip her pillow as Brittany finally touched her lightly with her fingertips.
She softly trailed her fingers over the top of her shoulder... neck... down the center of her back... lower... the small of her back, finally resting her fingertips on the waistband of Santana's purple-lace panties. She stopped and Santana could feel the eyes bore into her, she caught another faint sigh and, again, suppressed her own. Brittany leaned forward and had made the decision to go in for the kill. Santana was relieved; she couldn't take it any longer.
Brittany started off with light grazing of her lips again on Santana's shoulder. Fresh goosebumps formed instantly, and her plan was slowly crumbling. The grazing turned into light kissing up her neck... nibbling back down... and finally, the slight poking of Brittany's perfect tongue as she licked her way to the shell of Santana's ear. She skillfully swirled her earlobe before taking it between her lips, sucking and nibbling. It was, in fact, the final death knell. Santana's plan of playing 'asleep' had to respectfully be aborted; she had given it the good ole College try.
"Ohh... baby..." she finally moaned out, arching her back.
"I knew it!" Brittany huskily laughed. "San, you suck at playing Sleepyhead," she giggled and nuzzled into her shoulder.
"Hey," she finally turned in Brittany's arms. "You have to admit, I lasted longer than last time."
"I guess you did," Brittany grinned and leaned into a long overdue kiss. "But I was on to you from the moment I walked in, babe."
"What? Really?" she whined, clicking her tongue in disappointment.
"Mhmm, you never wear my favorite lace panties to bed, sweetie."
"Damn, I'm so not smooth!"
"Buuuut, I'm glad you did." Brittany suddenly rolled them over, so she was on top. She had that familiar gleam in her ice blue eyes that Santana had grown accustomed to over the last two weeks.
"Mmm, yeah? Why's that?"
She leaned down to kiss Santana's neck, sucking her way to her ear. "So, you can keep them on while I fuck you." She hissed into her inner ear, tugging on Santana's earlobe.
"Oh, fuuuuck..." Santana rolled her eyes back and let her head fall to the pillow.
Brittany smiled into her pulse point and was done talking as she forcefully scooted Santana's body down some. Santana could feel her wife's body vibrate at the prospect of releasing some of her tension. Like a world famous pro athlete needing to come down after a game, Brittany was amped.
"I missed you today..." Brittany breathed out between aggressive kisses across her collarbone.
"Mm, I missed you too, baby..." Santana responded by arching into each sloppy kiss and running her fingers through Brittany's rehearsal blown hair. "Now shut up and fuck me!"
Brittany giggled into a few sloppy kisses across Santana's chest before taking a nipple between her lips and sucking hard. Santana arched and hissed at the satisfying pain. She gasped out and looked down to lock eyes with Brittany as she treated the other nipple with the same reverence. Brittany dramatically swirled the dark bud with her long tongue and suckled as she stared back. Santana was sure she was going to lose it before they got to the good stuff. She forced herself to break eye contact before she prematurely came right then and there.
"Oh fuck, yes!" Santana moaned out and bucked up into Brittany's abs. She let her head fall to the pillow again, having essentially turned into putty.
"Mmmm," Brittany releases a nipple with a wet pop and hummed her way back up to Santana's neck. "I wanna make you come so hard, baby..."
Brittany whispered into her ear and teasingly tickled her hand down Santana's flat stomach. She cupped her over her lace panties, kissing up her jawline. Santana bucked and groaned. Brittany smiled into her pulse point as she softly rubbed her clit over the scratchy material.
"Mmm... so wet for me. Did you miss me?" she teased some more.
"Ungh... yes!" Santana moaned again. "Britt, stop teasing!" she ran her fingers through Brittany's hair again.
Brittany moaned into Santana's cheek before peeling back the waistband and sliding two fingers the length of her slippery seam. Santana's body jolted up; she was dripping for her wife and there was no shame in it. Brittany grinned like a boss as she leaned her forehead against Santana's. She playfully slapped her wife's thigh to let Santana know she wanted her legs wrapped around her for this one, and Santana eagerly complied.
"You feel so good, baby..." Brittany whispered as she thrusted. "I've been thinking about doing this to you all day."
"Oh my god..." is all Santana could muster as she grinded into Brittany's fingers for a few moments. She arched and lifted herself almost into her wife's lap as she rode her hand hard.
A few moments later, she had to mute a scream as Brittany entered a third finger and thrusted. Santana wrapped her legs tighter as she could feel herself clenching around those amazing fingers already. She held Brittany's face in her hands as the two rocked together - as they found their old familiar rhythm together. Santana was painfully close; there was no real point in holding back now.
"Give it to me, baby..." Brittany sweetly breathed into Santana's cheek. "Let it go."
"Unghhh, fuuuuck..." Santana moaned out, trying to blunt her sex sounds in Brittany's chest as she held on tight. She rocked and rode it out, lightly biting on her wife's collarbone. They finally collapsed back into the bed; Brittany still lightly rubbing her wife with her thumb, bringing her down.
"Oh shit..." Santana was trying to catch her breath, looking up at the ceiling. "That was hot, babe."
"Mhmmm," Brittany hummed in agreeance. and finally looked her in the eyes "But I think this is hotter..."
She flashed a devilish grin as she removed her glistening hand from Santana's panties. Santana watched wide-eyed as Brittany smeared the come on her breasts and nipples, then leaned down to lick and suck it off. It had been awhile since Brittany had done something like that. Santana was absolutely buzzing as she watched her wife lick the arousal off.
"Fuuuck, that's hot..." Santana whined and was enjoying the feeling of Brittany's mouth on her chest. She arched up into her mouth once more.
Brittany huskily giggled again, climbing up Santana's body to give her a kiss. She laid flush on top of her for awhile as the two shared lingering pecks and tucked hair behind each other's ears. Brittany finally collapsed with her head in Santana's chest after a long while.
"Mmm, baby... is it possible for you to have Swan Lake rehearsals seven days a week?" Santana joked, running her fingers through Brittany's damp locks.
"No," Brittany chuckled against her chest. "Besides, you would miss me too much."
"True," she nodded. "But the payoff would be you coming home every night and doing what you just did!"
"You're bad," Brittany laughed and finally sat up with a groan.
"I'm kidding," Santana sat up too and grabbed her face. "I would miss you too much, honey."
"Good..." Brittany whispered and smiled into a kiss.
"Now go take a shower! You smell like a sweaty Eva Daniels rehearsal," she teased.
"Yeah, yeah..." Brittany applied one more quick peck to her lips and rolled out of bed.
Santana fell back to their bed with a content sigh, watching her wife start the shower water and move around the room for a minute before disappearing into the bathroom. She folded her hands behind her head and stared up at the ceiling in ecstasy. Two weeks before she remembered questioning why her beautiful family couldn't have it all as her and Brittany sat at the listening party. Sure, it had only been two weeks, but Santana was feeling rather cocky about things. Her and Brittany seemed to be pulling it off.
"Yay or nay?" Santana held up two types of tiki torches for Roxie to choose from.
Mother and daughter stood in the Garden Center at The Home Depot in Prospect Heights in early April. To say they both looked out of place in the DYI heaven would be an understatement as it took them both an hour to even find the outdoors section.
"Ummm, how about neither?" Roxie's face went crooked in disgust.
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Santana took another look at the torches in her hands before putting them back. "Too tacky, huh? We only want classy and elegant for our backyard. Oh! What about those mock Greek columns?" she pointed and briskly walked.
"Oh god, no! You went from bad to worse! Tía, do you even know what you're buying? Better yet, do you even know what you're doing?" Roxie looked bored out of her skull and folded her arms as she followed slowly behind.
"Of course, I do!" Santana scoffed as she walked up to the gaudy marble columns. "Hello, I'm a lesbian, Rox. The Home Depot is like Disneyland to us! In fact, you should learn it well or get the store floor plan tattooed on your forearm," she laughed.
"Uh huh... that's why it took us an hour to find the garden section and why we've been separated from Auntie B and Gabe for just as long?" Roxie smiled.
"Whatever, you're being a downer," Santana chuckled. "Come on, Rox! You're not the least bit excited about remodeling the backyard?"
"Tía, why would I be excited? Getting dirty and doing manual labor isn't really my thing."
"Well, it isn't like we're putting the hot tub in ourselves; I'm paying someone to do that." Santana clarified. "All you gotta do is get some quality bonding time in with your mothers by helping plant some bushes and placing some lawn furniture around. It'll be fun, mija!"
"Maybe... I guess," Roxie sighed and looked down at her shoes.
"Hey, what's up with you?" Santana softly asked, realizing her daughter had been in a mood for the last month. "You been extra PMS'y since your Winter Concert."
"I don't know," Roxie mumbled.
"You and Zoe on the fritz?"
"Um, I don't know what that means," Roxie shook some bangs out of her face.
Santana chuckled and rolled her eyes, thumbing through a lawn furniture catalog. "It means are you guys having problems?"
"No, not really..."
"What is 'not really'?" Santana quoted.
"I don't know," she lamented. "I just feel like I haven't really seen a lot of her lately. Like ever since freaking Natasha came into the picture, her, Zoe, and Cassie have been the fucking Three Amigos just hitting up Brooklyn and having a jolly ole time!"
Santana laughed out at Roxie's exaggeration. "So why don't you make it the Four Amigos and tag along?"
"Because..."
"Because why?" Santana got the slight feeling Roxie was starting to be irrational about this whole situation.
"Because, Tía... I hate Cassie and Natasha. I would just be tagging along hating the shit they were doing just to hang out with Zoe. I don't wanna be that girlfriend, you know?"
Santana looked up from her catalogue and studied Roxie for a moment. The girl was staring off into space, doing a series of her famous nervous ticks again; ticks Santana hadn't seen her do in a while, not since falling in love with Zoe. Santana's eyes zeroed in the cheek biting and ring rubbing, and she was instantly transported to a year prior, as if she was having this conversation with the severely anxious Roxie of old. She was mildly alarmed.
"Rox, have you talked to Dr. Levy about this... or Zoe?" Santana tried to be cool and calm.
"I guess a little with Dr. Levy, but not Zoe. Why?" Roxie casually ran her hands through some displayed astro-turf.
"Why?" Santana mocked. "Oh, I don't knooow... because she's your girlfriend and you're having issues with her best friends."
"I don't know, Tía. I guess I just feel stupid bringing it up with her. I know Zoe, she'll tell me it's nothing."
"What's 'nothing', mija?" Santana cocked her head and was eager to hear Roxie out now that she got her talking. "You still think Anna Kournikova wants to steal your girlfriend? Because it's been a couple of months, Roxie. If she hasn't done anything by now-"
"It's not just that..." Roxie finally looked into Santana's eyes. "I-it's all these little things I've been noticing..."
"Like...?"
Roxie shook her head, quirking her mouth. She finally sighed and gave in. "Like if Zoe and I are supposed to hang out, they keep her longer than she's supposed to be. They constantly wanna do shit they know I'm not interested in. And they just spring up plans on her out of nowhere! I'm starting to think it's on purpose now! Like right now; Zoe was supposed to call me an hour ago! I know you think I'm crazy; that I think there's some big conspiracy against me-"
"Hold up!" Santana raised her hand. "I don't think that, honey... okay?" She took a step towards her daughter and was now fully alarmed. Santana lightly grabbed Roxie's shoulder and looked into her eyes to make sure her daughter knew she was on her side, and would always be.
"Okay..." Roxie weakly nodded.
"I do think you need to be smart here though, Rox." Santana suggested. "I was a mean girl in high school; I know the fucking game. Don't let them bait you. I also know that the only person that matters here is Zoe. You need to talk to her. Tell her everything you've been feeling. She'll understand. Have some faith, sweetie."
"I'll try... and I'll talk to her, Tía." Roxie cracked a half-smile, nodding. Her face seemed to light up ever so slightly at her mother's advice.
"Good!"
"There you are!"
Santana and Roxie's moment was interrupted by a relieved Brittany pushing a loaded cart around the corner. Santana could barely see Gabriel's head bobbing among the many gardening tools and supplies as he chomped on a chew toy. Two teeth had finally poked through a week before with a few more seemingly to follow before his birthday in a month.
"San, step away from the ugly Greek columns!" Brittany laughed.
"Hey! There you are," Santana sweetly smiled. "We thought we lost you guys forever," she mocked.
"We're gay women, I thought we were supposed to know The Home Depot like the back of our hands?" Brittany teased.
"I think we just officially killed that stereotype, honey." Santana laughed with her and pulled Gabriel out of the cart seat. She brought him to her face and blew a few raspberries into his cheek and neck.
"Finally!" Roxie semi shouted and looked down at her ringing phone. She continued to walk ahead for some privacy and take Zoe's call.
"What was that all about?" Brittany asked, looking between Santana and a wandering Roxie.
"I don't know," Santana lied, not wanting to explain at the moment. She brought a babbling Gabriel closer and lightly grazed her lips against his forehead as she watched her daughter walk away.
"Oh! Tiki torches!" Brittany finally dropped the subject and walked over to the tacky torches Santana had just put down. "These would be pretty awesome in the backyard, huh?"
Santana laughed out and nodded. "They would be very awesome, babe."
She couldn't contain her giggles as a confused Brittany stared at her.
The next day, a sweaty Santana pulled her ear buds out and finished off her water bottle as she glided into the kitchen after a Sunday morning run. She smiled at Brittany, who sat at the dining table entrenched in paperwork. She had to semi dodge Gabriel as he slid around in his blue baby walker, giggling and playing with his toys. Santana quickly opened the fridge and pulled out another chilled bottle of water before walking up to the table.
"Hey, baby," Brittany finally looked up and smiled. "How was your run?"
"Hey stranger..." she opened the bottle and plopped into the seat. "It was amazing. I figured out the trick is to go in the morning when all the East Williamsburg hipsters are still waking up from their Saturday night PBR hangovers."
"Ah, is that the trick?" Brittany amusingly grinned.
"Mhmm," Santana smiled into a drink. "So, I don't have to compete with them on my route. By the way, who the hell can run with plastic rimmed glasses and converse on anyway?" she squinted her eyes in annoyance.
"Apparently they can, honey." Brittany chuckled and went back to her work.
There was a moment of silence; the only sound was that of Gabriel navigating his plastic walker around the kitchen and laughing hard as he bumped into the island. Every time he would crash it he would grin with his two-toothed smile up at his mothers until they acknowledged just how funny it was too. Santana finally sighed, leaning her chin on her water bottle cap.
"What's on your mind?" Brittany finally asked, still sifting through paperwork and typing on her tablet.
"Mmmm, it's nothing, Britt." Santana hummed and quirked her face. "Just something Rox said yesterday is bugging me."
"She's a big girl, San. I think we should let her fight her own battles and figure stuff out."
"I know..." she sighed again. "It's just... are you keeping an eye out for her at school still?"
"Santana..." Brittany lowered her eyes and voice. "You know I am, babe."
"I know," Santana smiled. "I just wanna make sure-"
"I have to keep it professional, honey. You know that. She's my daughter, but it's not like I can play favoritism here. And honestly, the Russian b.i.t.c.h. has been a model student as far as I can see."
"I know..." Santana leaned back in her seat and nervously twirled her water bottle. "I just got a weird vibe from her yesterday. I don't want her to slip away..."
"Hey," Brittany stopped what she was doing to cup Santana's hand. "We're on top of this, sweetie. She's not going anywhere. But we also can't fight her battles or live her and Zoe's relationship for her. She's seventeen. She needs to experience and figure things out for herself."
"It's hard though..." Santana pouted, dropping her shoulders. "I don't want to see her get hurt."
"Awww, I know, baby..." Brittany leaned in to kiss her pout away. "We can do this though," she whispered into another peck.
"I guess," Santana sighed, but perked up at her wife's confidence. "What are you working on anyway?"
Brittany sighed and looked down at her work. "I'm just a bit behind in grading, nothing too crazy though. But I also have to finish planning my schedule for the rest of spring. We have Gaby's birthday next month, I have to figure out how to make Quinn's bachelorette party as raunchy as possible, I start weekend rehearsals in Manhattan in a few weeks with Eva, we have the backyard remodeling, and then Quinn's wedding..."
"Wow," Santana stared at her wife wide-eyed. "That is a lot, Britt."
"I know!" she held up her hands. "I'm just freaking out a little bit and wondering if I can handle it all."
"Okay, okay... you don't have to do it all by yourself." Santana grabbed Brittany's hands to calm her down. "One thing at a time then, sweetheart. You just worry about your grading first, and you know you have my help for the birthday party. Give me a job!"
"You sure?" Brittany searched her eyes, subtly pouting. She wasn't to the point of being overwhelmed yet, she just had a major fear of not being able to handle it all at the moment. She was starting to have serious doubts about pulling everything off and making it safe into late summer without any major issues with her family.
"Brittany!" Santana half laughed and shouted, causing Gabriel to stop what he was doing momentarily and look up at his mothers. "Of course you can!"
"Okay," Brittany finally leaned over, smiling into a kiss. "Shannon's coming over in a few. You're going with her to Party City and picking up all the Star Wars stuff on that list."
She slid a small paper over to her with everything from Ewok party hats to a Millenium Falcon cake listed. It might as well have been written in another language, because she was totally lost. Santana's face instantly dropped at the prospect of spending a whole afternoon with Shannon Pierce and her nerd boner.
"Um, how about I grade your papers and you go with your sister, Britt?"
"Santana!"
"Kidding!" She really wasn't kidding, but it was too late to back out now.
"You better be." Brittany forced a smile, but Santana could see the underlying stress crack at her mouth.
"I got this, baby." Santana moved to get up. "I'm gonna take a shower, get everything on this list for Gabe's party, and do it all without having any major fights with your sister..." she laughed.
"Very funny..." Brittany finally snorted, rolling her eyes.
"Oh, also if you need me to go to a naughty store and pick up those little penis shaped suckers for Quinn's bachelorette party...? I can do that too. Maybeee... pick up something fun for us too while I'm there?" she wiggled a brow before standing.
Brittany laughed, and Santana rejoiced at finally getting her wife to forget about the scheduling stress for a moment. "No talking about penis suckers and possible new sex toys for us with Gabriel in the room," she joked.
"Yeah, yeah..." Santana bent down to kiss her wife's forehead. She lingered for a moment with her lips against her hairline and was subconsciously trying to send reassuring energy to her. Brittany sighed and leaned into the kiss, accepting the good vibes.
Santana smiled and kissed attacked Gabriel as she left the kitchen and made her way towards the stairs. She sucked in a deep breath and repeated Brittany's motto...
They could do this...
"Mmm, you always pick the best music to snuggle to..." Zoe cuddled closer to her girlfriend on Roxie's twin bed. "What's this band? I like them..."
Zoe scooted even closer to Roxie until their noses were almost touching as they shared a pillow. It was one of Roxie's favorite things in the whole world to do with Zoe to snuggle on her bed with the hazy, fuzzy noise of one of her vinyls playing softly in the background. There was nothing quite like listening to a good band play while snuggling with her girl for the length of the record. And that's what they found themselves doing after dinner at the Lopez-Pierce house one evening almost a week later.
"Beach Fossils..." Roxie answered, rubbing the tip of her nose against Zoe's.
"It's nice..." Zoe dazedly grinned, looking back into Roxie's eyes. She leaned into a kiss, softly rolling Roxie over, then slowly sliding on top. Roxie giggled and looked back towards her slightly open door.
"We'll just be quiet," Zoe whispered, biting down on her lip. "We can pull the blanket over our heads and they'll never know."
"Have you met my mothers, baby?" Roxie laughed. "They're like ninjas. If the slightest humping sound reaches their ears, they'll both be in here so fast! I'm not having sex with you in my room right now."
"Why not?" Zoe playfully pouted. "We did a few months ago..."
"Yeah, when my moms were in Manhattan for the weekend. Not with them down the hall watching a freaking Top Chef marathon on the couch," she giggled.
"Whatever, chicken." Zoe rolled her eyes and slid off.
"Awww, I'm sorry..." Roxie cooed. "Will you settle for some hardcore spooning instead?" She scooted behind her and was already sliding her arm around her waist, pulling her close.
"Fine! Some hardcore spoonage will have to do," she giggled as Roxie nuzzled into her neck from behind.
The moment was cut short by the text tone of Zoe's phone. She momentarily leaned out of Roxie's hold to grab it.
"Oh sweet!" Zoe blurted after swiping the screen and reading.
"Hm?" Roxie hummed, but didn't really seem interested as she had an idea who it was already.
"It's Natasha. She says they're playing a double feature of Warhol's Poor Little Rich Girl and Vinyl for one Friday night only at Brooklyn Heights Cinemas."
"That's nice..." Roxie ignored the news and began trailing kisses up Zoe's neck, doing her best to coerce her into forgetting the text.
"We should go, Rox! I'm texting her back and telling her we'll meet everyone in an hour," Zoe rolled onto her back and looked up at her phone.
"Nooo..." Roxie groaned into her shoulder.
"C'mon, babe. You love Andy Warhol; this is right up your alley!" she pleaded.
"But I feel like I haven't seen you all week though. Can't we just snuggle some more, get a late night pizza slice, then your house for a nightcap before I have to be back before curfew?" Roxie smirked and teasingly tickled her fingers up Zoe's stomach.
"We can," Zoe sighed. "But it's Friday, Roxie. We should hang out with people."
"You really wanna hang out?" Roxie asked, slightly sucking in her bottom lip and searching Zoe's face. She was disappointed that Zoe didn't see the importance of hanging out with her all night. Frankly, she was tired of sharing her girlfriend every free moment for the last month, as selfish as that sounded.
"Yeah, I do..." Zoe sweetly smiled back; her version of batting her eyes. Roxie could usually never resist it.
"Then you should go," Roxie casually said and hopped out of the bed, walking towards her record player. "We'll just meet up at your house in a few hours."
"But I want you to come," Zoe sat up, her voice semi urgent. "I don't wanna go alone."
"Z, you've been doing a lot of stuff without me lately. You should be used to it." Roxie mumbled with a poorly hidden hint of sarcasm and slid the record back into its jacket.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Zoe sat up straighter and stared up at her.
Roxie slightly winced after realizing how bad it sounded. There was a newfound electric charge in the air that raised the hair on the back of both girl's necks. Her mother had given her the advice the weekend before that she should probably have a talk with Zoe. Roxie had skillfully put it off for awhile, but things you always want buried have a funny way of popping up when you least expect them to.
Roxie sighed and turned around. "That's not how I meant it..."
"How did you mean it then?" Zoe scooted to the end of the bed.
"Huh?" Roxie answered, and was a little thrown off by the directness of her question.
"Okay, Roxie... I thought we were passed this," she subtly shook her head. "This whole head game thing you 'think' you have going on with Cass and Natasha. Baby, it's ridiculous!"
"Nooo, what's ridiculous is them texting you every fucking moment when they already hang out with you at school all day! Who's dating who here?" Roxie hotly shot back and leaned against her dresser. She had no idea why it was all coming out like angry word vomit at the moment. Things had been building up though.
"What?" Zoe's voice went up. She squinted her eyes and seemed confused by Roxie's tone. "Why are you getting so defensive?"
"Why are you defending them?"
"Okay, am I in the fucking Twilight Zone or your bedroom?" Zoe shook her head more aggressively. Roxie's month long moodiness was finally starting to get to her as well. "Defending them from what, Roxie? They're my best friends; I can't control when they text me!"
"But you can control if you answer them."
"Are you really mad at me for texting or calling my friends when I'm with you," Zoe's tone was now condescending. "Because that's crazy, Rox! What's this really about?" She finally stood up and folded her arms.
"You're really gonna make me say it, huh?" Roxie nodded her head as the couple stared daggers at one another from across the room. She was regretting the tone it seemed to have taken, but things needed to be said.
"Say what? Roxie, I'm completely lost! We were just cuddling two minutes ago and now we're having our first fight! And I don't even know what about!"
"You know Natasha still has a thing for you, Zo." Roxie rolled her lips and was praying her girlfriend wasn't so naive. "And Cassie is just her little fucking toady following behind trying to play matchmaker!"
"You mean like Jace Taylor has a fucking thing for you?"
"That's way different, Zoe."
"No it's not! It's the same thing, but I don't let it get to me because I trust you," Zoe softened her tone as she stepped in front of Roxie. "Do you trust me?"
Roxie stared back for a silent moment, flickering her eyes. "I don't trust her, Zo."
"That's not what I asked, Rox." Zoe took another step closer. "Do you trust me?" she asked the question again, and this time spoke small but direct.
"...I-I don't trust anything good in my life..." Roxie answered honestly and at a whisper.
It was haunting and heartbreaking that after all she had been through in the last year, she still couldn't shake the feeling of impending doom in her life. Maybe she would never shake it. Maybe there wasn't enough therapy in the world or talks with Dr. Levy that would help. Roxie swallowed back the anxiety along with a lump, and looked downright apologetic as she stared with glassy eyes into the beautiful hazel pools of her girlfriend.
"Rox..." Zoe started, but was still mildly shell-shocked by the admission. "If we don't have trust... we don't have anything," she swallowed her own lump.
"I know..." Roxie breathed out.
"I uh... think we need some space tonight." Zoe slipped her feet into her flats by Roxie's bed and grabbed her denim satchel bag. "I'll call you later, okay?" She softly kissed Roxie's cheek before leaving the bedroom. And in an instant everything felt empty and cold in the world; Zoe's light was gone.
Roxie stayed leaning against her dresser not knowing what to make of the situation. Somehow she didn't think It was the type of 'talk' her mom had in mind when she suggested talking to her girlfriend. It had gone from zero to a hundred seemingly out of nowhere. It was her and Zoe's first major argument. But it was more than that. It was a discerning wake-up call for the both of them. Some very important issues raised their ugly little heads.
And as Roxie blasted a Psychic Ills record, threw herself onto her bed, and shoved her face in a cool pillow; she wished those issues would bury their ugly little heads once again.
The next Monday afternoon, Roxie sat on a bench across from the main dance studio at BHSA. She anxiously tapped her foot and held onto her backpack straps as she waited for Zoe to come out. It had been close to an hour since school had let out, Roxie had already said goodbye to a rushing Brittany, who was trying to make it to Eva's rehearsal in Downtown on time. She checked the time again, and was becoming impatient as there seemed to be no end to the classical music pouring out from the studio door.
Roxie just needed to see Zoe. It had been the longest forty-eight hours without her. They had talked some on the phone that weekend, but Zoe still felt distant. And they didn't see much of each other at school that whole day either. Roxie was going crazy. She needed to apologize for the way things went down in her bedroom on Friday. She needed to tell her she did trust her! She needed to tell her that even though she didn't like her friends, she would hang out more and try her best to get along. Roxie's anxiety was ticking up as her mind moved a mile a minute. She rubbed her hands nervously and hung her head.
"You should go home, we'll probably be awhile in there."
A startled Roxie looked up to find the familiar plastic smile and smirking green eyes of the petite Cassie Toscano. The girl stood confident dressed in her dancer leggings and tank top; a water bottle in hand and a towel over her neck.
"H-how long are you guys gonna be?" Roxie sat up and hated the fact that she had just stuttered in front of her. "I wanted to talk to Zoe."
"Yeah, about that..." Cassie almost snickered, taking a step towards Roxie. "I think you should give her some more space, Rox. She's still upset about what happened Friday night."
"How do you know what happened Friday night?" Roxie coldly asked and tightened her grip on her straps.
"She told us," Cassie scoffed. "I had to call an emergency sleepover at my house for a little BFF time to help her through. She was way emo the whole weekend!" Cassie rolled her eyes at the memory.
"A sleepover...?" Roxie's mind was racing and her eyes deadened on Cassie.
"Mhm..." she smirked. "You know, just some of the core elite dancers, and... Natasha..." Cassie let the the last statement hang for affect as she delivered it with her famous richy-bitch eyebrow raise.
Roxie felt a fire burn in the pit of her stomach, and her ears got instantly hot. There was no mistaking what she heard and saw. Cassie wasn't being backhanded and stealthily conniving anymore. She was showing her teeth and her true intentions for all to see. Roxie took the bait and shot off the bench.
"Look, I don't know what your angle is here, Cass! But I'm fucking on to you!" Roxie pointed as she walked up.
"Please..." Cassie didn't flinch, standing her ground. "You're on to what?"
"This... this little fucking game you're playing! It's not gonna work, bitch! Zoe and I are strong. And I'm not gonna let you, Natasha, or anyone else come between that!"
Roxie didn't stutter as she walked just inches from Cassie's face. She balled her fists, but thought better of it, keeping her hands at her sides. Cassie's eyes flashed down to Roxie's hands, she noticed she was holding back.
"Is that so?" Cassie's eyes grayed as she kept her voice creepily calm and steady. "Because I believe I've known Zoe longer than you. Natasha has known Zoe longer than you. And if it wasn't for Mrs. LP and her wife taking you on as some charity case, you would still be just another poor brown person walking the streets of Bed-Stuy, being shuffled around the system. If you ask me... Zoe can do better than some chick nobody has ever wanted."
She flashed her eyes up and down Roxie's body in the most judgmental way. In a way designed to let Roxie know she was of the 'other' clan - that she wasn't suitable for people of Zoe's status. Roxie went white hot with anger and lost all her senses or boundaries. She balled her fists again until she heard the snap in her head. She shoved the small girl into the door with all her might. Cassie hit it with a thud.
"Bitch!" Cassie was feisty and came back at her just as hard, dropping her water bottle and shoving Roxie back, knocking her glasses off.
In a second there wasn't anyway of telling where one curse word started and where another one ended as the girls went at in the middle of the hallway. They wrestled and punched, taking turns landing some good blows. Roxie was from the school of Hard Knocks, but dammit if fucking Cassie Toscano's richy-bitch ass wasn't holding her own. Roxie was regaining the upper hand as the skirmish dragged on though, bull-rushing the girl into the door again before getting in a punch to her shoulder.
"Hey!" Roxie heard the deep voice of a man before feeling the strong arms of Mr. Helms grab her off of Cassie. The drama teacher lifted a flailing Roxie off the ground, restraining her.
"Roxie and Cassie, stop it!" Quinn pulled Cassie back as well. Roxie was coming out of her blind rage in time to see that Quinn and Nick must have walked up on the girl's bout.
"What is wrong with you guys!" Quinn asked, grabbing a squirming Cassie tighter around the waist.
"What's going on?" Everyone's attention was drawn to the doorway of the studio as a crowd of dancers stood. Zoe stared in confusion between Roxie and her best friend.
"You're fucking girlfriend is psycho, Zo!" Cassie held her split lip and decided to play the victim. "She just fucking attacked me out of nowhere!"
"Bitch, that's not what happened and you know it!" Roxie yelled and squirmed, trying to get at Cassie again. Nick grabbed her tighter.
"I don't care what happened, you're both going to the office!" Quinn put on her best teacher's voice and without warning pushed Cassie to move down the hall and towards the main corridor. Nick followed a few paces behind with Roxie after helping her grab her glasses and backpack off the ground.
Everything was still in blind hysterics as Roxie hadn't even noticed the scratch above her eye was bleeding. Nick tried his best to calm and soothe her as they walked, but all Roxie could think was how everything had been going so wrong over the last three days. How the hell had everything gone so wrong?
She just needed to explain herself, she thought. But as she looked back, locking eyes with a disappointed and emotionless Zoe, there was some serious doubt on when that would ever be.
"I don't get why you're so mad at me, Tía." Roxie waited by the car for Santana to unstrap Gabriel out of his car seat. "You should be proud of me for standing up for myself!" she kicked an acorn and looked down at her tattered Vans.
"Really, Roxie... really?" Santana brought Gabriel to her hip and stared at her daughter. "Because I just love picking you from the office of your high school after yet another fight! It's always the best part of my day!" she poured the sarcasm on thick and shoved Gabriel's diaper bag in her arms.
"But if you heard the crap she said, Tía. I'm pretty sure you would have tried to beat her ass too!" Roxie defended herself, following behind Santana up the stoop.
"There's no excuse for fighting, Roxie." Santana shook her head and fumbled with her keys, finally opening the heavy oak door. "Besides, I thought we were passed this type of behavior, mija."
Santana whined as they stepped into their entryway. She turned to face her daughter with a pained expression. Roxie saw the disappointment in her eyes and it made her lower her head in shame as she quietly shut the door behind her.
She sighed and opened her mouth to speak. "...I-I'm sorr-" before Roxie could finish the door swung open and a panicked Brittany stepped in.
"What happened?" Brittany threw her dance bag to the side and even ignored a squealing Gabriel who grabbed for her in Santana's arms. "Are you hurt, Rox?" she grabbed Roxie's face to get a better look at the cut above her eye.
"I'm fine, Auntie." she batted her hands away.
"Britt, I told you it was fine. You didn't have to leave rehearsals, honey." Santana readjusted a babbling Gabriel on her hip.
"Santana, our daughter was in a fight. That's a pretty big deal! Eva said it was no problem."
"I'm just gonna go to my room now," Roxie tried to slip by.
"No!" Santana and Brittany said in unison.
"Why?" Roxie rolled her eyes. "I already know, I'm grounded. There! Can we move on now?"
"No!" They both said again.
"We're not gonna have this conversation around Gabriel and in our doorway. Come on!" Brittany waved everyone into the living room.
Santana put Gabriel down by the coffee table and he immediately started playing with his favorite toys on the ground without missing a beat. The couple cornered Roxie off to the side of the living room, out of Gabriel's vicinity.
"Now what happened?" Brittany crossed her arms. It was never her style to just bombard her daughter without a cooldown period, but Roxie hadn't shown this type of behavior in a while. She was alarmed.
"It was just a stupid ass fight!" Roxie was getting annoyed.
"Language!" The said in unison.
Roxie rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. "I was waiting for Zoe, and then Cassie came walking up and basically told me everything that I already suspected. She insulted me and she insulted you guys!"
"Oh, our hero! Thanks for defending our honor!" Santana held her hands up and mocked. "What did I tell you about taking the bait, Roxie? I said you had to be smart, not conjure up the spirit of the freaking Brooklyn Brawler!"
"Whatever... it still felt good..." Roxie turned her head away from eye contact and had that faraway look again that the couple hadn't seen in a year.
"This is a big deal, Rox. You'll get written up, and you might be out of the end of the May Showcase."
"I don't care." Roxie sharply said.
"Don't talk to your mother that way!" Santana took a small step forward. After all these years, she still had an innate reaction to defend Brittany, even against their daughter.
"Look, I know I messed up. But honestly, the stupid May Showcase is the last thing on my mind. Can we just skip all this touchy-feely stuff? Just say how long I'm grounded, so I can go to my bedroom? I'm not in the mood." Roxie's eyes darkened, another thing the couple hadn't seen in awhile.
"You're not in the mood?" Santana echoed and almost laughed at Roxie's boldness. "Girl, where do I even start with the size of your punishment! First off, I don't care if manual labor isn't your 'thing', Roxie. You're helping us-"
"Holy shit!" Roxie's eyes widened as she stared past her mothers in shock.
"Don't change the subject!" Santana and Brittany said in unison.
"No, look!" Roxie pointed.
Santana and Brittany followed Roxie's finger to find Gabriel wobbling by the couch as he let go from the cushion. It was more than a second and he hadn't plopped on his puffy diaper yet. In fact, he looked emboldened in his little denim overalls. He stared down at his tiny red converse in concentration, then back up at his family and grinned.
"Baby, camera!" Santana quietly hissed, not wanting to scare their son.
"I don't have my phone! It was in my dance bag that I threw!"
"I don't have mine either," Santana whined and started slowly walking towards Gabriel.
"I got it!" Roxie saved the day and pulled out her phone from her jean pocket. She immediately swiped the camera and began shooting the amazing moment.
"Ohhh," Brittany cooed and slowly crawled a few feet from Gabriel. "Come on, Gaby! Come to mommy, baby." she held out her hands.
"Come on, mijo!" Santana was on her knees with Brittany, waving him on.
Gabriel wobbled, then grabbed the couch again for support. He looked a bit confused as a chorus of 'come on, Gaby' rained down upon him from his mothers and big sister. And for a minute Santana thought he was going to plop to his knees and just crawl to them. But, to her surprise, Gabriel released himself from the couch and took a wobbly step towards them. They cooed and kept encouraging. And he took another step. The process went on for a total of four steps until an exhausted Gabriel plopped on his pampered butt in front of his mothers. He whined for a second at the commotion they were making, then giggled as the family took turns kiss attacking and crying over him.
"Aww, did you see that?" Brittany cried and held Gabriel to her chest as she stood up. "He's getting so big, San."
"I knooow," Santana cooed, nuzzling into the top of his head. "I can't believe he's gonna be one year old next month."
"Family hug time!" Brittany announced.
"Get in here, Rox!" Santana waved their daughter in, and Roxie laughed as her mothers squeezed her in their sandwich.
"That was pretty amazing," Roxie grinned. "I already sent it to your phones."
"Thanks, Roxie..." Brittany was still emotional and sniffly as she held her family.
"Thanks, mija..." Santana smiled. "...but you're still grounded," she reminded her after a beat.
"I know, Tía." Roxie chuckled.
The four of them held each other for what seemed like minutes as they let Brittany get her emotions out. It was a big deal. Gabriel had taken his first steps. He was on his way of being a happy and now mobile little boy. But Santana couldn't help but notice the dichotomy in her arms. Here she had her son taking his first steps forward on the same day that her daughter had taken a few back. She didn't dwell on the negative too long though. Her family was strong, and would continue putting one foot in front of the other.
End Note: Yay, Gabriel! But boo, Zoxie drama! Lol, please stick around. It's gonna get juicy ;-)
Random Note: Some Anons skillfully talked me into writing a Zoxie one-shot set in January when Brittana were in Manhattan and Zoxie had to babysit for a weekend. It's going to be packed with domestic!Zoxie goodness, as well as some sexy times for the first time in Roxie's bed lol. If you're interested, follow me on tumblr (martianinthought) as I'll be posting it there in a week or two :D