Chapter 35
Father Knows Best

"You know, if I was ever the captain of a pirate armada I'd name all my ships after prehistoric oceanic creatures, and my main ship would be called the Megalodon."

"Oh, so you're going to be a pirate when you grow up?" Carl smirked at my announcement.

"No, but maybe I'd like to travel around a little. You know if all that stuff about the Hope Diamond is true, we may all be victims of an ancient curse."

"I don't think that's what's going on, Judith." My brother scoffed, but his skepticism didn't discourage me.

"Think about it," I tried to explain, working myself into more and more excitement. "The Hope Diamond is given a completely new look and a few days after its release, the dead started rising. The stone is infamous for passing from one owner to the next who all met their ends pretty gruesomely and it all began when somebody stole it from the statue of a Burma idol with supernatural powers until a traitorous monk stole it! What if all this is just an elaborate curse we're all under and it'll take the dedication of a brave traveler to restore the jewel to its original idol to break the curse for now and always so that mankind may heal at last!"

Michonne and Carl looked at me with identical expressions of somewhat patronizing amusement. "And are you that traveler?"

"I could be!" My eyes sparkled at the idea. "What an adventure that would be…"

Daydreams about such a quest lit through my mind the whole way back to the Hilltop. I imagined the journey as something out of Lord of the Rings like returning the ring to be destroyed in the fires of Mount Doom. The thought of restoring an ancient jewel definitely had a legendary quest ring to it. What a story that would be to tell around the campfire.

On a journey like that there was no telling what you could meet. There could be bandits, monsters, cannibals, pirates, storms, wild beasts… boy, that sounded like a trip!

It was close to sunset when we finally got back to Hilltop. The supplies we presented were well received and Michonne and Carl began trading among the towns folk as they had discussed on the road. It was stranger for me to trade, I normally just left people things on their doorsteps, but on our way here Michonne had brought up the subject of bartering.

"You worked hard for this stuff, Judith. You should be paid for your work, and you risked your life for it."

I frowned by that. "You know I didn't. Not really…"

"Well we need people to believe you did. If they don't, it'll look suspicious and it'll arise too many questions."

"They've already started asking questions." Carl interjected. "David was supposed to be dead, but he isn't. His partner saw him get bitten and his wife knows about it, too. They don't know how he was spared, but I'm sure they'll find out soon enough and in no time, all of Hilltop will know and it'll spread like wildfire to everyone alive for miles."

Those words scared me. They'd been scaring me for years. I'd often imagined what would happen if people found out about my secret power and my imaginings almost always ended with me being dragged away to the Sanctuary, a fate that was more frightening than dying by any walker bite. In fact, it always started and ended with that image. There was almost never any room for other scenarios.

I didn't know what went on in their land, no one really did for sure, but if the end results produced people like those monsters I did not want to discover those activities. We could only imagine, and those possibilities eased no one.

I was riding with Carl when he said those words and had unconsciously tightened my arms around him, frightened of the thoughts that spawned from them.

I could feel him turn to look back at me but I didn't return his gaze, fixing my eyes on the ground as it moved below our horse. Maybe he realized he had unnerved me and could feel my trepidation pulsing from my frantic heart, and so moved to offer reassurance.

"I'm pretty sure no one would tell the Saviors, though. No one we know is that stupid or selfish."

"Someone might be…" I answered with unease. "If we haven't told everyone yet, then we can't trust everyone and that's dangerous."

"Well they wouldn't know the whole story, and what good is that, really? And even if they did, what proof do they have? It's our word over theirs and as far as anyone knows the only thing you've got is the cure; no one of concern knows it's full potential."

"Maybe they'll get some idea after we come back with all this. I mean how are we going to explain all these goods? Everything's supposed to be picked clean for miles."

"We got lucky when we came across an abandoned bunker." Michonne stated in a tone that was as if it were actually true. "They had all kinds of stuff. That's how we found it all. We picked it clean and that's all anyone needs to know."

"Crap, then how am I supposed to hand out the souvenirs I got for the Waifs and Dad?"

"I don't think you need to worry too much about them. They won't reveal you, and didn't you say you had a story already thought-out if questioned? I mean you can't exactly hand over that diamond without explaining where you got it."

"That's just the diamond." I told them. "But yeah, I guess I see your point. Dad and the kids are going to be the last people to spill the beans, won't they."

"You think he'll be disappointed?" Carl answered. "You know, that we went to Washington without him and sort of went sight-seeing and saw a lot of cool things… I mean they were cool, for the most part."

"Tell me about it. Those brochures should have prepared us for that." I said humorously. It felt very wrong making light of the tragedy that befell the city side by side with the rest of the world in the first place but we all still laughed, so I guess we'll be going to hell together.

"We only saw a few things." Carl responded. "I mean there's still plenty left to see for another day. We didn't see the Capitol Building or the White House."

"Or the Space and Aircraft museum." Michonne added.

"Or the American History Museum." I stated.

"Or the Library of Congress."

"Oh, it's amazing! Wait till you see it! The entrance lobby is enormous." The words were out of me before I could think better of them.

Both Michonne and Carl's gazes swerved over to look at me in shock. "What? How do you know what it's like?"

My neck began to sweat nervously as a memory from years ago involving my friend John rose up and I struggled for an explanation I couldn't give them. "Uh… Oh look! There's the Hilltop! HI ROSITA!"

I slipped from the horse before another word could be said and rushed up as the woman and a few others sprinted towards us.

"Where the hell have you guys been?" She rounded on us. "You take off and all you leave is a note?"

"Sorry." Michonne explained lamely, lowering from her own horse. "I had a hunch about where we might find some supplies. I wanted to follow up on it."

"So, you don't take more of us with you?" The woman looked utterly outraged. "What the hell?"

"Hey, we found some really good stuff. We even scored a bigger wagon to load it all with." Carl announced pulling back the tarp to reveal the treasures underneath.

Her eyes went big and she looked at the goods, mainly the ammo, guns and weapons with a longing expression.

"How did you find all this?" She stared, touching one of the revolvers.

Michonne and Carl's gazes turned in the corners of their eyes and towards me while I pretended not to feel them.

"I'm going to find Dad." I announced, sprinting up the hill before they could call me back.

I passed a few people who greeted me as I rushed by, but I had no time to return any of their acknowledgments while I made my way towards the infirmary.

Doctor Carson was coming out just as I reached the door.

"Is he alright? Is he doing okay?"

The man didn't need to ask who I meant. "He's doing fine, Judith. He's still a bit sore from the surgery but he should be ready to go home today."

I breathed easy and turned into the house. "I'm seeing him." I didn't need his permission or verification. It had been three days and I would see my father whether or not anyone agreed.

"Dad!" I exclaimed, rushing into his room. "I'm here. We're back!"

He was sitting up in a chair, leaning over a desk as he wrote something down. At my announcement he turned, looking stunned and then relieved to see me, as if he'd been rolling through heavy emotions of anxiety since the moment he discovered we were all gone. I rushed to embrace him, but reminded quickly that he was still recovering when my arms held him too tightly around the abdomen. He pushed the pain away though, determined that he would savor our reunion without interruption, bodily discomforts be damned.

"Oh, thank god! I was just about to get a horse and go after all of you! Where have you been?"

"It's fine." I told him. "We're all fine. I'm so happy you're okay! We found so many things and stuff. I even got you something."

I dug in my pocket and fished out a metal replica of the Lincoln Memorial, small enough to fit right into his palm and engraved with the words we saw at the temple. "I snagged a few postcards, too. I thought it'd been kinda cool to start a collection. I'm gunna travel the world, Dad. I'm going to go everywhere."

There were mixed emotions rolling around on his face and I could tell he wanted very much to blow up over the decision we had all made to go into the danger zone behind his back, despite the objections. But the happiness on my face was so sincere I didn't expect he had the heart to, at least not until Michonne stepped into the room.

His eyes were very angry when they landed on her and I detected betrayal behind it.

"Judith, give us a minute."

I knew what he was probably intending to talk about and resolved to spare Michonne the lecture we all felt coming.

"Come on, Dad. It wasn't dangerous, and you should see all the stuff we found. It was awesome! You have to come along next time. You'd love it."

His expression wavered slightly but he looked driven, and when he looked like that, there was no force that would change his mind.

"Judith, wait outside. We need a minute alone." I didn't want to move but a look from Michonne told me it would be fine.

"Would you actually go find Jesus." Michonne suggested.

"Not you, too. I thought you respected my beliefs by now!"

"Judith!" This time both of them pointed to the door, issuing me out. Apparently, my joke didn't land with them.

The door slammed behind me but I didn't want to really find Hilltop's leader. What I wanted to do was press my ear against the wood to listen in on what they were saying. So, I did just that.

I could hear Dad speaking in a strained voice. "You went behind my back—and while I was unconscious. What were you thinking?"

"We can't protect her forever, Rick." Michonne fired back. "She needs to learn these things as Carl learned these things."

"I never wanted Carl to learn these things in the first place. He shouldn't have had to."

"If he hadn't he wouldn't have lived this long and you know it."

"He wasn't given a choice. Judith was."

"So, we should prioritize one over the other?"

"Of course not! How dare you!"

"How dare I?" Michonne sounded utterly insulted, and I could picture the expression of offense on her face as she placed a hand on her chest at the mere suggestion. "Rick, she isn't that impressionable little girl anymore. She's not ignorant or helpless. She needs to know how to make it on her own in this world. And she needs to understand her new position in all this. Despite what you say, she is special and now she's more valuable than ever before."

Dad didn't respond to that, but I could almost hear the wheels in his head turning, furiously trying to fathom an argument that would counter what she was leading up to, but he said nothing.

"Caging or shielding her doesn't help her. The only way we'll ever truly help is by preparing her as we have done for Carl, and the best time to do that is right now. We can't wait for when she's older, it's just not practical, not to mention dangerous for her."

Dad's voice was strained but it sounded as if he was beginning to cave. He couldn't fight her logic. "She's not ready."

"She is ready. The only one who isn't ready here, is you."

Their voices turned to hushed tones and it was hard to guess what they were saying as they moved about the room. I jumped when a door slammed somewhere behind me, catching sight of someone entering the hallway from one of the mansion's many other rooms. I focused on the sight of an old man and realized quickly it was Gregory, the dishonored ex-leader of Hilltop.

He was removed from any position of authority not long after her relocation to Hilltop became permanent and was replaced by Jesus. No one cared for the man all that much, and I had heard Maggie refer on how spineless he was on a number of occasions.

His head turned and met my gaze in a way that set me on edge.

It seemed the general importance of Michonne and Dad's discussion was over, so I guess it was prudent to get going.

Outside the setting sun was skimming over the edges of the trees. The evening breeze billowed through my sidetail and I took a deep breath, making my way back towards the wagon. It was a real relief to find out that Michonne was talking to Dad about all this. As it had been proven before, I guess I wasn't that great at persuasion. Maybe I'd get better.

"Judith."

I turned and saw Dr. Carson coming towards me.

"Dr. Carson, hello."

"Hello. How are you today?"

"I'm alright. All things considering, I guess."

"I wanted to discuss something with you."

Those words sounded odd to me. People from other communities didn't normally discuss things with me. It was usually Dad, Michonne or Carl they wanted to speak with. It was only Negan that ever required my attention.

"What about?" I asked, feeling strange.

"I'd like to ask if you would be comfortable giving a donation today? I mean, I understand you donated last week and you were injured a few days ago, but if it would be at all possible…"

"Was anyone bitten?"

"No. At least no one in town at the moment. But if there was an accident, it's important to be prepared."

He didn't have to finish. "Well of course, I will."

"Thank you, Judith."

I followed him back to his office and lied out on the cot in there while he prepped everything. My eyes kept switching back from him to the machine while my blood filtered inside. It was silent until he found a topic of conversation.

"So… how was Washington?"

I was startled that he knew where we'd been, but after a moment to consider I guess he would be able to figure it out rather quickly.

"It was cool. We saw the monuments."

"Really? Was it very crowded?"

"There were walkers everywhere if that's what you're talking about."

"That's unfortunate."

"You mean fortunate!" I contradicted. "There were a whole lot of stuff we were able to find thanks to that. The city's mostly untouched. It's practically a treasure trove. We should make another trip into it, real soon. And with it so infested it's less likely to be scavenged by other people. I should feel bad about that, but I don't really."

"I suppose that can be an advantage now."

"A big advantage! This is so exciting! I can't wait to get started with bigger parties."

The doctor looked concerned. "You think that's wise?"

"Well… only for people trustworthy. I was really afraid of coming forward, but now that I see all the good I could do I don't think I can get started fast enough."

Carson held a fond sort of expression as he watched the plasma separate. "I think you're going to end up doing a lot of good, Judith Grimes."

"I hope so." I lied back and closed my eyes relaxing as the chilling saline drained back into my arm with the red cells.

"Would you like something to eat." Doctor Carson asked.

"I don't think I'll have time. Michonne and Dad asked me to "find Jesus" before you called me over. It seems my heathen ways have finally gotten the attention of my Christian parentals." My air-quotes made him snigger but it was my last comment, spoken in a thick southern accent that really made his head bend back in amusement.

"Yeah, that's why they asked you to find him." He laughed. "I don't think they'd object if you had some food. In fact, I'm pretty sure they'd insist. You have to keep up your strength, after all."

"Well Michonne also wanted to show me how to barter."

Carson looked sincerely surprised by the news. "You don't know how to barter?"

"Well… not skillfully. I usually just end up… giving the stuff away."

He looked to the side, thoughtfully. "Yeah, you should learn how to do that properly."

"I guess it'd be useful to know."

"It's important because people could start taking advantage of you that way. They may start expecting things from you for free."

The announcement made me huff indignantly. "I don't let anyone take advantage of me."

"I certainly believe that, but haggling is still incredibly relevant to learn."

I didn't know how to respond to that, plus I was getting dizzy so I leaned back and closed my eyes against the drain in my arm. Doctor Carson must have seen my expression and stood up to go to the small fridge in his office.

"Let's get you some food. I know you said you weren't hungry but you still need something if you're donating. Do you like pudding?"

"I actually don't care too much for sweets, or at least sweet-sweets."

"Alright. You like vegetables?"

"I love my vegetables."

"Great." He pulled out a bag of peeled carrots, cucumber slices, and celery sticks along with a container of homemade dressing. I reached in and took a carrot while he grabbed a piece of celery. "Cheers." He said knocking his to mine like a drink before dipping it in dressing.

I munched delightfully on the vegetable, savoring the tangy vinegar based sauce. It seemed just the thing to wet my apatite and without being asked if I wanted more, I reached into the bag and helped myself. It only took about five minutes for me to eat my way to the bottom of it and even after finishing the whole bag I was still hungry. I knew better than to ask for more, though. Typical rule of thumb among communities, if it was all he gave me, that generally meant that's all there was.

"I think that's enough for today." Dr. Carson announced when I'd finished the bag. He switched the machine off and disconnected the needle when the remainder of the red cells had finished flowing back into me. "Take a moment before you get up, alright."

I had planned to, flexing my arm against the new bandage he wrapped it in and feeling dizzier and dizzier the longer I sat there. The door opened at that moment though, to reveal Dad and Jesus. He looked to have been worried for a moment as if he'd been looking for me.

"Oh, there you are. I thought you went to go find Jesus for us."

"I'm pretty sure you can't ask someone to find Jesus for you, Dad. If you want to accept him into your own life, that's your choice. I've got my own spiritual journeys to deal with."

Both Jesus and Dr. Carson smiled by the joke. Dad looked a little fed up, though.

"Okay, enough with that joke."

"Hey, if I have to sit through your dad jokes when we go hunting, you can stand my Jesus jokes a few times when we're here."

"Mm, there it is," Carl muttered under his breath as he suddenly entered behind the two other men.

"Plus, what am I supposed to do when you walk right into them?" I added.

"Okay, okay. Touché."

Their tones turned serious just then and I sensed an important discussion about to be had. As if sensing it too, Carl closed the door, leaning against the window to watch for anyone approaching.

I looked from one man to another, wondering and slightly concerned about what was coming next. Perhaps sensing what the discussion would be about I distracted them with a question.

"Will we be making another trip out soon?"

"We'll worry about that later." Dad said. "We wanted to discuss something with you."

"Is it about more donations? Because I'm okay with that, too."

"You would be okay with that?" Dad repeated back. The answer didn't seem to surprise him but he did look concerned.

"Yes. Of course, I would." I said earnestly.

The men exchanged glances between them, before Jesus continued. "Judith, we want you to know that this is important. You have two very unique abilities that are invaluable; that makes you invaluable."

"I know." I stated. "And I'm ready to do whatever you need me to do."

Jesus seemed to carry the majority of the conversation while he faced me. "Well… the thing is. You've been risking your life pretty recklessly as of late. You were kidnapped only a few days ago, after all. You suffered a concussion within that period and a few days prior to that you were mauled by a bear. In just a few weeks you've been severely injured and abducted. We need you to tell us now if your abduction was just random or if you were targeted."

My voice caught in my throat and heart skipped a beat. Lying didn't seem like a wise choice, and there was a large likelihood that they would see through that. What was the point in keeping it a secret anyways? They already knew about it, so why hide?

"I… I was targeted." I finally told them. "I think it was the Wolves, but I'm not sure if it was them or not. It could have been someone else."

"So, how many other groups do you think know about you?"

I rubbed my neck, uncertain about that myself. There seemed to be spies everywhere, almost. "Well, the group that kidnapped me… I'm pretty sure they're all dead. Negan saw to that. He was pretty pissed off."

"Do you think the Saviors know about it?"

"I don't think so." I confirmed, shaking my head. "He wouldn't have brought me back otherwise, but he would make sure you knew he had me. And he wouldn't pass up an opportunity to gloat about it."

"That is definitely true." Dad deadpanned.

"Could he ever figure it out?" Dr. Carson asked.

Carl's snort from the window made us all turn. "Probably someday. He does with everything else we try to keep from him." Everyone held similar looks of exasperation and his response was to shrug defensively. "What? It's true."

Dad seemed less than impressed with my brother's choice of words. "Despite Carl's apathetic response, he does have a point."

"Have you been careless lately?" Jesus asked in concern.

Oh boy, that was a loaded question. Many would probably consider my actions in the past to be rather careless.

"Um…"

Dad pinched the bridge of his nose "Never mind."

A spike of fear shot through me and my mouth went dry at the terrifying possibility. "Well… what can we do?"

"We'll wait a few days," Dad announced. "We'll let things quiet down, when Negan comes tomorrow you're going to behave and not test him and let things drift back into their usual routine. After that, we'll make more plans and see where we'll go from there."

"But we will be able to make more trips into the cities now, right?" I asked hopefully, eager for an opportunity to see all the things I didn't get to see. Only this time, Dad would be with us, so we'd be able to enjoy it all as a complete family this time.

"That brings us to another subject." Dr. Carson began. "Since your blood carries antibodies that can fight the harmful pathogens from walker bites, but you're also able to divert entire herds without being harmed in anyway, it leads us to a very difficult decision. We need to prioritize your value, Judith. Taking you out on those trips is an enormous risk. Should another rogue group like the Wolves discover the sort of things you can do, it puts you in danger of being kidnaped again."

"But I'm fine!" I scrambled. "I'm totally fine… or at least mostly fine."

"Yes, but then next time…"

"…You might not be fine." Dad finished gently. "Or worse… someone else might not be fine."

I could understand what they were saying, but that didn't mean it made me feel better. I could feel the burn of tears coming just then. Where they saying what I thought they were saying?

"So… does that mean I can't go outside the walls anymore?"

The thought, was horrible. It was such a large part of me. Being in the forest was so, so important. Being on the island with Vanessa, learning about spells and gardening and nature and hunting… would I have to give all that up… to be the cure?

Dad looked sorrier than any of them and for a moment it seemed like he could actually feel how hard this was for me.

"I'm so sorry, Judith, but it's really for the best."

"But what about all that stuff you were talking about with Michonne about not caging me? Was that all just bullshit?"

He looked startled to hear I had overheard that part of the conversation, but he didn't reprimand me for it. "We've talked about this before, Judith. Not at least without someone, and not for a while after all this."

"So, I'm just grounded again?" I was getting angry now. "I thought this was supposed to be a good thing." I had felt so relieved after hearing Michonne and Dad's talk because I really believed she would be able to get through to him.

"It's not like that." Dad tried to explain. "You're not a prisoner and you're not grounded. You wanted to know how you could help; this is how you help. We need you prepared to give donations if an emergency comes up."

"But I can do more than just that. I want to do more than just that."

"Right now," Jesus began gently, "That's all we need from you."

I looked from one adult to the next, wondering how this had happened. It felt like I had been ganged up on. It was all of them verses just me. I couldn't argue with four adults like them on my own. They were the leaders of our communities, and according to everyone… they knew best after all.

Author's Notes: I know it's been forever since I last updated. This chapter took forever for me to figure out! Don't you just love jumping around in a story and writing out you're favorite parts of a book instead of writing them in chronological order like any other normal person? What? You don't? Gasp! Is that why it takes me so long to update a story? Naw! Couldn't be.

I'd like to give a big shout out to Deadlyflames! Thank you for all your beautiful reviews. You've no idea how much they made my day. Seriously, if you guys want new chapters out of me, the best form of motivation is reviewing. I love, love, love reading them!