EPOV

Perhaps I am just a product of my technological age, but there is no greater feeling than having an unabashed relationship status on Facebook. Sure, I had my relationship with Tanya listed for a few years, mainly because of her insistence, but once things had gone sour and broken off, I just unlisted myself all together. I didn't feel like reveling in my newfound single status and I seriously doubted listing my status thusly would prompt any of my Facebook friends to suddenly pronounce their undying love for me. And I certainly wasn't one of those guys like my third cousin Dwight who is in a "joke" relationship with a same-sex friend. At least I think it's a joke. I'll have to ask Alice is Dwight is gay before he comes to her wedding with some other guy as his date. Or just in case he's not "out" and I inadvertently say something about his propensity for guy-on-guy action in front of his mother. Not making that mistake again.

Honestly, I never really felt like my Facebook relationship status was that important. I highly doubted anyone was that interested beyond myself and maybe my sister. I don't know if it's just shallow or maybe I was a little envious of all my friends who were in proud, Facebook official relationships, but I honestly never saw why some people's lives revolve around things like "Sarah is engaged to Keith" and then "it's complicated with Keith" and then "Sarah is engaged to Keith" followed by "Keith is single." However, the entire time I was waiting for Bella to reply to my request, I was nauseous.

I didn't think much of it throughout the day Saturday when she hadn't responded, but when we came home from the park and there was no movement, I suddenly turned into Alice freshman year of high school when no one had asked her to the winter formal two days before the dance. I started analyzing every moment I had spent with Bella, wondering if I had sent off the wrong signs or just received them. I had a hard time thinking of Bella being shallow and not wanting everyone to know she had been seeing a computer nerd. There was also the possibility she was insulted I had asked her such a pertinent, relationship-defining question over Facebook rather than through the use of our actual faces. I mean, you wouldn't propose to a girl over Facebook. I had a feeling if you did your future marriage wouldn't be a healthy one. You know, unless you were embedded in a foreign country or in jail or something… Well, even then. Do prisoners have Facebook? That might be a question for Jasper. Or his Uncle Randy. On second thought, I probably didn't want to talk with Uncle Randy and especially not about his Facebook relationship status.

Naturally, the one scenario I didn't think of was not only the most likely but the correct one: Bella just didn't log on to Facebook regularly. I was pretty relieved when she clicked that little button, and even happier that, despite having seen some of their true colors, she was more than willing to become a fixture at family Sunday night suppers. Tanya had always tried to weasel her way out of those, even knowing how important they were. Though she was a little soused herself, Alice had confided into me Saturday night that Mom said she "didn't care for Tanya." That was basically the Esme version of a bitch slap.

I inwardly lectured myself for probably the thousandth time. I needed to stop comparing Bella to Tanya. There really wasn't much of a comparison to tell the truth. Bella actually seemed to like me while Tanya… Well, I had a hard time coming up with any reason why I legitimately went out with Tanya in the first place let alone stayed with her so long. I guess she was really the first girl who was interested, and it's nice to be wanted. Of course, I was quickly discovering it was not only nice to be wanted but to want someone in return.

Which brought me to my next dilemma. With Tanya, it had been whatever she said goes. I never really had any control over anything. Of course, Tanya would have laughed in my face if I had suggested she accompany me to a comic book convention or to watch the latest superhero movie. With Bella, we were on more equal footing and as nice as the 'things we've never done in Seattle' thing seemed to be going, I knew Bella would probably like one of those actual, traditional dinner and a movie dates. Or maybe just a nice, well-planned evening. I had no clue how to go about doing that and Googling "good date ideas" did more to stress me out than help my quandary. There was only one man I could think of that I felt even semi-comfortable talking to about romance and who I knew was fairly good at keeping one going.

"I'm surprised that you could take off from work to have a nice lunch with your dear old Dad," he said as we took our seats at a cozy soup and sandwich joint near the hospital.

"Well, you know, it is kind of easy to convince your boss to give you an extended lunch break when you work for yourself," I shrugged. Dad laughed.

Until the near fiasco of his and mom's separation, I thought of my father as the unquestioned king of romance. It was a marvel to me when I got older that he could not juggle the demanding career as a surgeon, kids, bills and still have enough time and energy to make Mom feel special at the end of the day. As kids, Alice and I would often see flowers on the dining room table, a "just because" present from Dad. Other times, he would randomly show up to take her out to lunch or take a day off for the two of them to spend together. Though they had been in a rut lately, I had to admit the old man was regaining his touch. As embarrassing as it was for me to see as their child, it was undeniable the passion and smoldering looks that had passed between the two of them lately.

"So, what do you need?" Dad asked.

"Huh?" I said, nearly dropping my menu.

"I may be your father, but I'm also a pretty smart man if I do say so myself," he said. "Usually, when my children take time out of their schedules for a lunch with their Dad, it means they want something. Your sister was out with me two weeks ago because she wanted to sweet talk me into buying a reproduction Civil War lace wedding gown that cost almost as much as my car."

"I don't want money," I said.

"Good, because I would have told you the same thing I told your sister," Dad said. "I'm not opening my wallet for you until I finish paying for your college."

"Hey, Alice is the one with student loans," I snorted. "I made my way through on scholarships, thank you."

"Yes, but not your books, the new laptop and all the computer programs you 'needed,'" Dad pointed out. "And the fact that your mother was afraid her baby would starve to death if we didn't buy you something more substantial than Top Ramen to eat. Not to mention the whole living off campus…"

"Hey, that was because of Mom too," I snorted. "Remember? She read that article about the guy who killed his roommate and ate him?"

"So, what is it you wanted?" Dad asked.

"Advice," I said.

"About what?"

"Bella," I admitted.

"Are things going well on that front?" Dad asked curiously.

"Well, yeah, but the problem is… " I sighed. "As juvenile as it sounds, I really, really like her, Dad."

"I don't really see that as a problem," Dad prompted.

"That's just it. I mean, I want Bella to like her too," I said. "And I don't want her to think I'm boring because… well, I kind of am a boring guy. I mean, I spend most of my days behind a computer screen typing in ones and zeros and code language. My main interests are comic books, zombie and kung-fu movies and highly technical computer stuff. I can't see Bella finding all that interesting."

"Edward, I'm going to let you in on a secret," Dad said. "Your mother subscribed to 'Wonder Woman' from the time she could read, one of our first dates was to a Bruce Lee marathon at a local drive-in, and your mother probably knows more about our computer at home than I do."

"Okay… I guess I'm off base with how I'm explaining this," I sighed. "How can I keep Bella interested in me? I mean, seeing dinner and a movie is great and all, but doing the same thing every week will get boring. And I'm starting to feel like I'm no good at this dating thing."

"When are you seeing her next?" Dad asked.

"We're doing dinner and a play Tuesday, which is sort of just like dinner and a movie," I said.

"Except plays are live action, a little bit more expensive and I personally find more intellectually stimulating," Dad said.

"How do you and Mom do it? I mean, how have you guys not gotten completely bored with each other in the past thirty years?" I sighed.

"You do remember about a month ago when you stormed in trying to break up my date with another woman, don't you?" Dad smirked teasingly.

"I think you know what I mean," I rolled my eyes.

"You know, in the past month I've found out things about your mother I never knew," Dad said. "Sometimes, I think you could spend a lifetime with a person and never fully know everything about them. It's all about maintaining that spark, I suppose. Rekindling the fire now and again. It's not easy and it takes hard work, but we care enough about each other to work at it. Having that piece of paper doesn't hurt, either. Your mother has told me there were a few times when the two of you were growing up she was so stressed, I was working late nights every night and she got to the point they only thing keeping her at home was that marriage license. She said she got mad at me now and again, but never enough she actually wanted to put forth all of the effort into getting a lawyer and obtaining a divorce."

"Well, that reaffirms my happy childhood image of my perfectly in love parents," I snorted.

"Edward, you're missing the point," Dad said. "Relationships aren't perfect. Nor are they easy. I get what you want. You want to make Bella feel special. And I understand the doubt. I can't count how many times I've wondered what on earth compels your mother to stay with me, me out of all the men she knows. I know you're squeamish about these things, but your mother has always been a real looker. And I wasn't the only one who noticed. For whatever reason, though, the only person Esme seemed to notice was me. And you have no idea how lucky that makes me feel."

"What do I do to make her feel special?" I asked.

"I'm sure you'll get ideas as you learn about her," Dad said. "This isn't something you can just solve with a quick search on Bingle or whatever. I mean, yes, I'm sure there are some good ideas there for you to consider, but something really unique and special comes from the heart."

"Like what?" I asked.

"That's something I can't tell you, but once you get to know Bella better, you'll find out things she likes, things about her past," Dad said. "That should give you some ideas for things special to the two of you."

"Okay," I said, a little disappointed that my father didn't have more to offer me in the way of advice.

"I know you probably want me to brainstorm for you, but trust me, son, this will mean more if the idea comes from you," Dad said. "Besides, this is something you will want to be special for the two of you. I have to say, I am proud that you are thinking this seriously about this relationship. I know the two of you haven't been seeing each other long and the fact that you are already willing to put this much thought and effort into the relationship bodes well for the two of you."

"You don't think I'm getting too serious too fast, do you?" I asked.

"I think I'm seeing my son much happier than he's been in a while," Dad replied. The waiter finally arrived to take our orders, and as he headed away, I had to admit my father was right. I was much happier than I had been in a while. "Speaking of your newfound relationship, your sister called your mother and I last night and was very excited to tell your mother and I about you and Bella making things 'Facebook' official."

"Yes?" I said, trying not to grit my teeth.

"I didn't understand what on earth she was talking about but your mother was very intrigued about this Facebook thing," Dad said. "After hearing Alice describe it, your mother decided she wanted one to keep up with you kids, and she was hoping you could help her set up one, since you know so much about computers and all."

I was going to kill Alice.

"Fantastic," I grumbled.

A/N: Swear to Batman I totally wrote the part about Esme's fears that Edward's roommate would eat him before all of these crazy bath salts/zombie people starting eating their roommates/homeless guys/Asian foreign exchange students.