Thirty-six

Ed was at the kitchen island shuffling through a couple day's worth of mail when the beeping of the alarm sounded and he heard footsteps, followed by some laughter. Keeping the one brochure in his hands, he padded through the living room and smiled as Olivia helped Noah with his winter gear and Charlie helped Lizzie.

"How was your outing?" he asked, coming over and kissing Olivia's cheek before taking all of their jackets and hanging them up.

"Good," Olivia sighed. "Found the supplies Noah wanted for his art project, including his much requested green, but not bright green, poster board. Which was a chore. Oh, and we picked up stuff for dinner, too. Mexican sound okay?

Ed's smile grew. His wife had been having a good couple of days with lots of energy and a healthy glow about her skin. Olivia had managed to do school drop off and pick up, not missing a beat with her son, and Ed could tell how much that energy had meant to her. She smiled more, her eyes sparkled more, and Noah was eating up having his mother seemingly back in full force.

The fatigue would get to her by evening, however. Though it was easily disguised from Noah, the rest of the family could tell. Charlie would do most of the cooking, Ed would clean up, and Olivia would relegate herself to reading stories in the big bed, much to the delight of the two younger Tuckers. In fact, the night before they had grown very quiet and when Ed went to peek in, all three of them were asleep, under the blankets, with the book still open on Olivia's stomach.

Now, as he eyed his wife, she still had some energy in her features so he took a chance. "It does sound good," he said slowly, "but I was hoping maybe you'd be up for dinner out? Just the two of us?"

Her brown eyes grew wide with a cautious excitement. They hadn't had a date night without it being full of cancer side effects in a long time. "Oh," she exclaimed, looking down at Noah. "But I promised Noah a fiesta…"

"It's okay," Charlie piped in quickly. "I can make all the food and we will just have a fiesta for three. How does that sound Noah?"

"I still wear da hat?" he asked, beginning to root through the bags for the ninety-nine cent sombrero he insisted upon buying at the market.

Charlie smiled. "Of course. It's not a fiesta without a hat. And you two can join us when you get back."

Ed turned his attention back to his wife and she could see the hopefulness in his eyes. Ed Tucker had been the backbone of their family throughout her illness, never once complaining or asking for anything, until now. And even in this moment, Olivia knew if she told Ed she was a little tired, or anxious to go out in public for fear of getting sick, he'd concede and would be just fine. But as she continued to gaze into his blue eyes, she found herself unable to deny his simple request of a quiet dinner out with his wife.

"A date night sounds good, babe," she finally replied, leaning in for a quick peck on the lips. "Wanna call around for a reservation? Maybe Francesca's or Brickyard?"

"Sure," he said, finally ushering everyone out of the foyer and towards the kitchen. "Coffee is on, but Noah…" he said, hands stretched wide and revealing the mail stack, a smile on his face. "You got some mail, buddy!"

Noah's face perked up as he climbed onto an island bar stool and started looking for his name.

"What is it, Daddy?"

Ed handed him the brochure he was still carrying. "It's about baseball sign up. Ya wanna play again this year?"

Noah examined the brochure carefully, turning the pages and looking at all the pictures. Olivia noticed that he was quiet and went to sit by him, running her fingers through his hair.

"You liked baseball, didn't you sweet boy?" she asked, trying to figure out what he was thinking.

Noah nodded. "Yep," he said. "It fun. You hit da ball then RUN RUN RUN and touch alllllll da bases, and everyone cheers!"

Ed and Olivia smiled.

"You did great, pal," Ed encouraged, and took a moment before continuing. Noah hadn't wanted to do many activities since Olivia's diagnosis. Everyone Ed and Olivia had consulted advised it was normal, and that perhaps Noah's way of coping was not to busy himself and to make sure he was always where he felt safest. Children had a natural way of adapting to scary things, and Noah's way may have just been to stay right with his family, at home, as much as he could. But with Olivia's illness hopefully almost over, both parents were hoping Noah would want to try baseball again. "You'll get to stay on the same team, with Coach Ray."

"He's nice. I like Coach Ray," Noah reminded them. "He say 'just keep your eye on da ball, Noah' and I did and then I got a hit!"

"Coach Ray is smart, isn't he Noah?" Olivia said, leaning over to kiss him on the forehead. "Do you want us to sign you up?"

"Yeah," he said, though his voice was soft.

"You sure, bud?" Ed asked, eyeing Olivia who still hadn't taken her eyes off of her son.

"I sure," he said. "But…Mommy you will be better and can come, right?"

A-ha, Ed thought. They were finally getting somewhere.

"Noah," Olivia began, biting her bottom lip as she searched for the right words. "Mommy has one more treatment. Then I'll have some tests to make sure that cancer is gone. But…" she paused, still wondering if she was saying the right thing. But she refused to give her son false hope and shatter his trust in her. "Even if the cancer isn't quite gone, and I need some more help, I'll still come to every game, okay?"

"Promise?" Noah asked, looking up at her with wide, curious eyes. Olivia gave him a smile before pulling him into her chest, holding his little body tightly as she rested her cheek on his head.

"I promise, sweet boy. Mommy will always be your biggest fan."

Ed was seated across from Olivia at a round table for two, situated by the window of one of their favorite upscale restaurants. Knowing Olivia couldn't drink, they had both opted for a sparkling water and the waiter, seeming to understand, brought their drinks in a nicer wine glass. Ed and Olivia toasted to the "home stretch," as Ed kept referring to the last treatment that way. Their eyes didn't leave each other as they took their required post-toasting sips, but Ed immediately reached for his wife's hands after they set their glasses down.

"I've missed this," he said softly as he played with their intertwined fingers. He immediately regretted his words, however, as he watched Olivia's face fall. "Oh, baby, I didn't mean…"

"Stop," she whispered, shaking her head and giving him a teary smile. "I've missed this too. And…I want you to be honest with me. Always. Even when it may sting a little."

"You've been through so much," he rasped. "I hate adding to it. None of this is your fault, Liv. It just…"

"Sucks?"

Ed chuckled and squeezed her hands in appreciation for the candid relief in an otherwise heavy conversation.

"Yeah," he agreed. "I'm just so happy to be here with you, ya know?"

"I do know," Olivia allowed, leaning forward and nuzzling his nose with hers. "I'm happy to be here with you, too."

The couple munched on a light appetizer platter with various cheeses and crackers, enjoying lighthearted conversation, something they hadn't had in a while. Ed would make a wise crack about someone on the street and Olivia would look, roll her eyes, then agree with his observations, causing a smug grin to grace his features. Occasionally another patron would eye the couple, likely with a hint of pity seeing the scarf on Olivia's head, but the pair ignored the looks and focused on each other, basking in the hope of being near the end of the journey.

Finally, once their main dishes were cleared away, Ed ordered them both a cappuccino and leaned over to take Olivia's hands again.

"Olivia," he began, taking a deep breath and breaking eye contact, instead focusing on how her hands fit just perfectly in his larger ones. He held them tenderly but strongly, assuring her that he had her back in every way he could. "I know the next two weeks, with treatment on Monday and then…that wait…"

His voice cracked a little and Olivia gripped him tighter, but she didn't speak. Instead, she gave him the time and space he needed to open up.

"It will be excruciating," he admitted, looking up and into her deep brown eyes. "For both of us. And I just need ya to know…that I'm gonna be right there. Even when I'm a mess myself. I'm gonna be right there."

"I know you will."

"And…and even if the worst happens, and we have to keep fighting…" he finally allowed, a tear sneaking down his cheek as he moved his shoulder to brush it away. "I'm never gonna leave your side. We're gonna beat this. I…I promise you Olivia Margaret. We are gonna beat this."

Olivia swallowed hard, but didn't speak. She couldn't without bursting into a fit of sobs in a public restaurant. So instead she let his words sink in, allowing herself to feel loved and supported in a way she used to only dream of. After a few minutes, finally feeling stable enough, she leaned over and kissed lightly at his face before ending with a short but sweet smooch on his lips. Sitting back in her chair, she moved a hand to trace his cheekbone.

"I love you, Ed Tucker. I love you so much."

"I love you, too," he said, glad she allowed him that tiny moment of emotion but also grateful she seemed to understand his need to go back to regular date night. The waitress dropped off their hot beverages, and again Ed decided to toast.

"To always being together," he said, softly clinking his mug against Olivia's as her smile grew.

"Always."

Charlie was just coming out from checking on Noah in his bubble bath when the front door opened, revealing Trevor carrying several shopping bags. She rushed over to help him, giving him a kiss hello then smiling as she heard Lizzie's voice as she ran in from where she had been playing.

"Daddy!" she yelled, and suddenly Charlie was grateful she had taken his bags because their daughter launched herself into his arms and cuddled into his neck. "Hi Daddy."

"Hey Lizzie-love," he coed, rocking her softly and smiling down at Charlie who was still watching them. "Didja have a good day?"

"Yesssssss," she responded, her little voice still soft and somewhat high pitched, like most two year olds. "Miss you."

"Missed you too, little lady," he said, bouncing her a bit before placing her back on her feet and watching her toddle back off to her toys. "It's quiet," he observed.

Charlie wrapped her arms around his waist and kissed him again. "Noah is in the bath and Dad took Mom out for dinner."

"Good for them. Also…do I smell tacos?"

"You do. Still out, but in the containers. Go fix yourself a plate. Relax."

"You're the best, babe," he said. "I'm just gonna grab my suitcase, wash up, then I'll be right out."

"Great," she said. "I'll go drag Noah out of the bath before he turns into a giant prune, and I'll meet ya at the table?"

"It's a date."

The couple went about their next tasks, Charlie bargaining with a pouting Noah about getting out of the tub. She ended up having to promise three extra chapters, in addition to his usual two, but he finally got out and into his pajamas. Noah combed his hair and brushed his teeth, humming softly as he went about his routine, before scampering out and heading to the toy corner to play with Lizzie until they were both relegated to bed. Seeing the kids were occupied, Charlie moved to sit at the table with Trevor as he happily ate his four, overstuffed tacos.

"Four?" she asked, raising an eyebrow jokingly at him.

"They are good," he managed to say, though his words were jumbled because of the large helping of chicken, quac, and cheese in his mouth. Charlie let out a little chuckle and moved to wipe the corners of his mouth with a napkin.

"You're so cute," she cooed, kissing his cheek and settling back. Trevor finished his bite, took a sip of his Corona, complete with a lime wedge, and leaned back in his chair to look at Charlie. "Talk to me," she implored, knowing something was on his mind. "What's going on?"

"A case has come up at work," he began, and he immediately backtracked realizing he started the story in the wrong way, given that his last major case had resulted in witness protection. "Let me start again," he got out and watched as Charlie let out a laugh, though it wasn't quite the laugh he loved most. "My partners and I are working on a pretty big case, and it seems it's a bi-coastal thing."

"Wow," Charlie breathed out, leaning her cheek against her hand and rubbing his arm with her other one. "Sounds…intense."

"It is," he allowed. "But I think we've finally found the break we need. Several witnesses who are willing to talk…but it may take some work to gain their trust."

"That's great," Charlie exclaimed, and Trevor could tell she meant it. "But what's the other part you don't wanna tell me?"

"They live in Carlsbad," he said, watching her closely as she reacted. It took a few minutes but as her face fell slightly, he knew she understood what he was saying. "I know it's…bad timing. But it just feels so good being back in the swing of my job…"

"You'd go there?" she asked, confirming her thoughts. "How long?"

"Probably a few weeks."

"Wow," she whispered, rubbing her forehead but also taking a deep breath. "You think you'll get them to talk?"

"That's my hope."

"I believe in you, Trevor," she said with a small smile. "And…maybe the timing is a little off, but things have been so…hard here lately. Southern California probably sounds great to you."

They both laughed a little bit before Trevor shoved his plate out of the way and leaned completely over into Charlie's space, holding her hands and looking into her eyes.

"I won't go if you don't want me to. Just say the word."

"Go, Trevor," she said quietly, and he could hear the sincerity. "It'll be fine."

"You're sure?"

"Absolutely."

He smiled and kissed her, smiling even more when she opened her mouth and deepened the kiss. Finally pulling away, they both sat back down and then Charlie narrowed her eyes.

"What else?"

Trevor fidgeted.

"Well," he began, "Tessa is out there, and I was thinking that maybe, I'd, uh…I mean if it's okay with you…maybe I'd take Lizzie?"

Charlie felt her stomach tighten, but she tried not to have an outward, negative reaction.

"For the whole time?" she managed to get out, and Trevor nodded. "Wow," she breathed out. "That's…that's a long time…"

"I know it is," he said quickly. "And…it's fine if you say no. I just…I've missed so much already, and I know Tessa wants to see her. And I know you're still not…in a good place…to deal with her."

"Trev…"

"Look, I don't want you to be mad. I just want you to be honest."

Charlie sat there quietly, pondering his request. But at the core of her thoughts was the fact that he was Lizzie's parent too, and he honestly didn't need her permission to take his daughter on a trip. So even if her heart was screaming to keep Lizzie at her side, at all times, she trusted Trevor and deep down wondered if having that break would be good for all three of them.

"Okay," she said softly, nodding her head and watching as Trevor's eyes widened in shock.

"Okay?"

"Yeah," she confirmed. "You should take Lizzie. She'll love being in the warmer weather, and letting Aunt Tessa spoil her."

"You'll be okay?" he asked one more time, even though his gut was telling him she wasn't lying to him. Her blue eyes were clear, despite a tiny hint of worry, so Trevor relaxed.

Charlie gave him a big smile and patted his shoulder. "You know me," she said. "I'm always okay. You two go have some fun. But you better bring me back some good presents."

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