Its been years literally...but life got to me...and then a writers block so huge and heavy it could not be budged. And well... Merle died and Beth and Daryl...so many changes that changed my mind set on this whole story. But as part of my determination to shake this block...and move on...I want to finish this thing. It would be the first story I've ever finished in my life...so give me strength. Review if you want and help if you can. My apologies for those of who followed and were let down.

Not a boy

She hadn't ever been with a man, didn't take much to figure that one out, even if she hadn't told him. But she had. She'd been shy, and nervous and scared…she'd made it clear…she hadn't ever been with a man…but she wanted to be with him…eventually. That was the hard part. He hadn't waited this long for a piece of pussy…ever.

There hadn't been a woman in his life he'd ever wanted as long as this one, and stuck around waiting for. He'd always gotten every piece of ass he'd ever wanted pretty damned fast. He was good at what he did, he had a special skill set in that department, an all the right equipment. Word got around fast in small towns, with trashy women… and he always got what he wanted pretty damned easy.

But that was another problem, she wasn't trashy, or fast. And his skill set, and equipment… it wasn't exactly perfect for this type of situation. He supposed that she'd be a hell of a lot more comfortable with a fumbling boy then someone like him. Someone, smaller and softer…all around. Now he wasn't just talkin about his cock here…or his body…he was talkin about his everythin'. He knew he was big…huge…in every way…attitude, personality, wants…needs.

And then there was something else, something he didn't want to necessarily admit to even himself. She wasn't necessarily a piece of ass, wasn't now and hadn't ever been. I mean sure, she was young, and she was gorgeous, and he wasn't stupid enough, or drunk enough to not realize that he woulda never gotten near anythin' like her if it hadn't been for the dead risin'. But the dead had risen, and somehow he'd gone from scumbag to….well to somethin' else…somthin' that attracted her somehow.

And hell, all things combined, from losing his damn hand, to findin Daryl, all grown up and more of a man then he'd ever been, to findin this little girl… all soft curves and blue eyes. Somehow all those things, all those things and many more, had turned her from a piece of ass to somethin' else.

He didn't know what…and he didn't wanna think about it….but he knew…more now than he ever had, that he wasn't gonna be takin nothin from her that she wasn't wantin' to give.

And right now, in this damned dark prison, pressed up against his body, he could feel her shaking…not the kind of shivers that passion sent down yer spine…but the kind when ya scared…

He pushed back and brought his hand up to her shoulders. "Ya wantin' in my bed sugar ?" he asked quietly.

Beth swallowed hard and nodded, her eyes fixed on his chest. She was scared… but she wasn't gonna lose him over this. No way…she'd been the one to after him. She'd set her sights on him, and gone against Daddy, and Maggie and Glenn… and everyone even Daryl… and she'd thought things through…she had…she wasn't ready …but she wasn't gonna back down.

"Hey," he rasped softly, bringing his hand up to grasp her chin, tilting her face up to look at him, "You wantin' me…or ya wanting in my bed ?"

"I…" she started, her eyes trying hard to avoid his, "I want…" she swallowed again, "I want…" she started again.

He shook his head and wrapped his hand up in her hair tugging her close, "Ya wantin' in my bed." He answered for her. Another sleepless night for him. Drunk and horny, with this little angel tucked in besides him.

"No," she closed her eyes, and inhaled deep, the smell of him…musk, and sweat..and something sharp and so male stung her nostrils, she wasn't gonna lose him over this. "I can give you what you want." she said quickly, all in one breath, with her face hidden. "I can…" she repeated softly.

He shook his head and pulled back, his heavy arm slingin' across her shoulder, as he turned and started heading towards his cell. "Ya got no idea what I want sugar," he laughed out softly, "and ya aint getting anythin' tonight."

Beth frowned, wasn't this whole thing about her not wanting to have sex ? How could he think she had no idea…one minute he was calling her a tease, and telling her he was done waiting…and now she offered herself up and he goes and tells her no. "I think I know what you want Merle." she said quietly, her voice coming out as little more than a whisper.

"Nah…ya dont." he whispered as he pulled her into the shadows, into the furthest corner of the block that housed his cell. He still had some alcohol coursing through his veins,, and he had plenty of desire there as well… "I dont want no little girl givin' herself over ta me cause she's scared Im gonna walk away…I want a woman…" he stopped and turned facing her, broken nose, grey stubble, and eyes turning black already underneath. "I want a woman …. who wants me just as much as I want her."

-xoxoxoxox-

"Wow," she whispered in the dark, startling Daryl who nearly jumped out of his skin.

"What the hell ya doing out there woman ?" He whispered, "ya damn near gave me a heart attack."

Carol slowly slid under the sheet and onto his perch. "Did you hear that ? That was pretty hot."

"Hot ?!" He answered incredulous, "That weren't hot ! Christ sake Carol… that was Merle and Beth…that was just…wrong."

"Now hold on," she answered sidling up besides him on his bed, "it wasn't necessarily wrong , your brother was very…noble…he kept Beth from…"

"Noble ?!" Daryl exclaimed… "Are ya outa yer damned mind woman ? Ya think a man his age even thinkin' those things about someone like Beth is noble ?"

"Weren't you just defending him a couple of hours ago ?" Carol asked raising her eyebrow.

"Just cause I'm telling all y'all he ain't no rapist don't necessarily mean I'm okay with all this." he huffed out before turning to face her and scooting over, " 'Sides, wait a minute, why were ya even out there ?"

"Couldn't sleep." she shrugged, "heard Beth crying and…I just wanted to make sure she was okay."

Daryl shook his head, "So, ya didn't trust him either huh ?"

"Oh stop," she whispered, scooting closer towards him, "I have no doubt your brother could have had Beth anytime he damn well wanted. He wont ever lay a finger on her…" she paused and turned to look at him, "until she wants him to."

Daryl took a deep breath. His perch suddenly felt too small and too dark…and even though it was nuthin' more than a glorified shelf with a sheet hangin' across one side of it, it felt too damn private. And why in the hell did she keep scooting closer to him. Christ almighty, he wished he could just nut up and reach over, put his arm around her, pull her close….put to use that strip of rubbers his brother stuffed in his hand when they were unloading the car.

Carol sensed his discomfort instantly, the way his body stiffened up, and she could almost feel a cold chill settling through his perch. Christ, sometimes she felt like Merle Dixon herself, chasing after something she wasn't bound to get…at least Beth had a little bit more courage in that department than Daryl did, she thought to herself with a slight chuckle.

Daryl turned to face her, his eyes narrowing slightly as he took in her smile, their was mischief there, he just knew it. "What the hell's so funny ?" he whispered.

She looked down for a moment and then back up to find him staring at her through the dark, "Nothing," she said, gaining some confidence, "It's just that sometimes i feel a little bit like Merle."

Daryl took a sharp breath and shook his head lightly. She felt like Merle ? Did that make him fuckin' Beth ?! No, no, no fuckin no way. Yeah he was a damn pussy when it came to this sorta shit but there wasn't no way ,no how, his goddamn woman was gonna compare him to no fuckin' virgin teenage girl !

He shook his head and straightened out his shoulders ,taking another deep breath before saying, "'Cept I aint a boy," then he turned to face her, "and I know exactly what I want." he finished.

Carol gulped, was this even happening ? Did she just hear that ?

He didn't know where he was getting' the courage...the adrenaline from having' to defend his brother, the humiliation at having her think that of him...the desire to be with her. They all bunched up together and gave him that final push he'd been waiting on all this looked over at her and reached his arm across, his fingers weaving tentatively into her hair. His heart was pounding so loudly he was sure she'd be able to hear it- if he didn't pass out first. If he managed to stay alive she'd be able to hear his heart any minute.

But funny thing was, when he got out of his head and looked over at her, he didn't see nuthin' smug, he didn't see no mischief, no victory, no smile even…all he saw was pure nerves…prolly as bad as his.

"C'mere", he whispered giving her hair a slight tug to pull her over, as is other arm wound softly around her waist. "I ain't a boy." he repeated as he leaned forward and his lips pressed up against hers.

Carol thought she was going to die. Actually she thought that maybe she had died and gone to heaven…or she was dreaming. Definitely dreaming…something…it had to be something…because one minute she was teasing Daryl, watching him squirm and fluster, with delight…the next minute she thought that maybe she had gone just a little bit too far…and the next minute she felt his hand reach into her hair, and his arm wrap around her waist and his mouth…god yes his mouth push up against hers.

He closed his eyes and parted his lips. He wasn't gonna give her any of this pussy shit. Christ almighty, he was the man here, and even if his heart was about ta leap out of his chest, an his hands were shakin' like crazy, he tightened his grip on her and pulled her in tight, his tongue slipping through her lips.

She couldn't believe how she went nearly boneless in his arms. She hadn't been kissed in ages…hadn't ever been kissed like that. Hadn't ever been anything with anyone who was anything like him. Christ he was all man. Her arms slid up and rested on his arms. Those arms, pure muscle, every inch of them. She rubbed up and down slowly, tentatively…and leaned into the kiss.

He was pretty sure he never had a woman turn to Jello on him. Hell he didn't even know they were capable of that. All he knew, is that feeling her melt into him like she was, gave him a boost of confidence like he never had. His arm pulled hard against her waist and he felt his fingers wrap up in her hair… and he tilted her head over and he was pushing his tongue nearly half way down her throat till he started comin' to his senses.

Slowly he pulled off her lips and loosened his hold on her hair, his hand sliding down to cup her cheek. Her eyes were closed and her lips were wet and parted, her hair wild and he could see her panting. He leaned his forehead forward and leaned it up against hers.

"Hey," he whispered, "Ya alright ?"

"Mhm," she hummed, her eyes still closed.

He rubbed his hand up and down her back slowly. "Ya feel like ya lost all yer bones." he said softly.

"Mhm," she hummed with a smile, "I think I did."

He chuckled softly, not bein' able to stop himself from thinking , hell yeah, i did that to my woman- His hands slid up to her shoulders and he started rubbing them as his forehead pulled off hers. "Come on," he whispered, giving her a little shake, "Lets get ya to bed."

Now it was her turn to freeze…sure she wanted to be with him, be with him, in every way…she just didn't think they were…ready. And suddenly she wanted to take back every taunt and tease she'd ever laid out.

Daryl froze too, did she think he was gonna…hell no…. I mean not that he didn't want to… but christ he'd used almost all his courage already tonight…he needed a breather 'fore he went down that path.

"I meant lets get ya to yer own bed…" he mumbled, his hands still on her shoulders, "in ya cell."

Carol looked down and smiled shyly, the last thing she wanted to do was be banished to her own cell, but she knew how Daryl was ….and unless he asked her to stay…she really didn't want to push him anymore. She nodded quietly and stood, taking a deep breath, and letting it out as a sigh.

"Come on," he laughed quietly, looking down at his boots, "aint so bad…let me walk ya down…"

He followed her out and headed towards her cell quietly, they could hear the snores and breathing of everyone around them, the occasional low moan of the walkers outside… and groans of the concrete prison around them.

When they got to her cell they stopped and she leaned quietly on the walls behind her, "How come Beth gets to spend the night with her Dixon ?" she asked quietly.

Daryl shook his head, "I ain't my brother," he said, putting a hand on her shoulder and edging her in. "Ain't no shy ass teenager neither," he mumbled under his breath, "but I ain't Merle." With that he turned on his heels and left.