Chapter 35
Today began simple...
Helena is curled up next to you on the couch as some movie plays on the screen. One of her arms is wrapped around you and the other is constantly traveling from the bowl of popcorn to her mouth and back again.
It's simple but when you stop to embrace the moment you see just how complex it really is. She is yours and you are hers, that was established quite some time ago. Logically you should feel used to feel of her body pressed up against yours and the smell of her apple shampoo wafting around you, but you aren't. It still makes you feel safe; her warmth and her touch still sends a comforting shiver through your spine.
Life is complicated. Her mind is constantly racing with ideas for story's or inventions and you find yourself unable to quit connecting the dots around you. The everyday things that nobody pays any attention to, meaningless details and boring explanations. You've never met anyone, not even Helena, who's sees it the same as you. She sees the big picture, the endless possibilities, the infinite beauty. You see the little things, the cold-hard facts, the beauty found only in that special circumstance. That's what defines your view of life and it is one of the most confusing things you've ever had the pleasure of experiencing.
What amazes you is that, despite your different views of the world around you, she fits you perfectly. Your minds, despite their being opposites, communicate on the same wave length. Her head is always in the clouds and you're always down on the earth, yet you still work together as one. It's illogical and shouldn't technically be possible, but it somehow it is.
You have no idea what movie is playing, or even how long it's been on because all you can focus on is her. She blindly reaches for another piece of popcorn somehow knowing exactly where the bowl is. You smile as she brings it to her mouth, eyes still glued to the screen. She is fascinating. Her breaths are even, as are her expressions, and even laying down her hair is in just the right place. Her eyes are endless voids of dark brown and you find yourself memorizing for the millionth time every speck of color in them. She shifts slightly, unconsciously reminding you that you are resting up against her body. Silently you tangle your hand with hers and she looks down at you. You smile and snuggle further into her warmth.
Suddenly, a sharp pain shoots through your abdomen; you curl your back and cringe in pain.
"Myka?" Helena asks, pausing the movie. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine," you try not to whimper. The pain passes though and you're able to breath again. "I'm okay, sweetie, you can play the movie."
She hesitates, "You're sure?"
"Helena, I'm fine," you insist kissing her cheek quickly.
And that's what you told yourself far into the night. The pains got sharper, longer, and the minutes between them simply shortened and shortened. Walking didn't help, neither did laying down, you had no idea what was happening to you until Helena finally said. "Darling, are you sure this doesn't have anything todo with the baby, something like, I don't know labor?"
"Don't be ridiculous Helena..." you start to defend, but then you actually consider...
Helena sits up in the bed and shouts "Oh my goodness, you hesitated!"
"But Helena-"
"You're in labor, oh my gosh you're in labor!" she squeals jumping up. Then the situation really sinks in and Helena, your 'I can handle anything' Helena, begins to panic. "Alright, alright, we need to get you to the hospital, can you walk to the car? Do you need me to carry you? How far apart are the contractions? What does-"
You shake your head feeling a headache come on. "Helena! I'm not due for another-"
"Two days! Myka, the due date is simply an estimate! Practically a guess!" she tells you as you're helped to your feet. "Now can you walk or-"
You roll your eyes. "Don't be ridicu-" you feel the pain return and your knees feel weak for a moment. "Just give me a moment- I can walk I promise."
She runs a hand up and down your back as your face twists in pain. Oh yes, this is going to be the worst and best experience of your life.
"Did you make sure to call the parents? They would kill us if we forgot," you remind her as she helps you through the hospital doorway. Almost immediately your led to a wheel chair.
"Yes, darling I will call them," she assures you.
"And don't bother with Charles, your mother will call him without asking," you remind her. "Wait, is he even in the country?"
"Yes he's here," she says walking quickly to keep up with you as the doctors wheel you into a room. "And so are Ed and Joey remember?"
"Oh right right," you breath as another contraction approaches. "I-I forgot."
Helena comes into the room with you, and the doctor recites to you all these technical medical information. You don't hear a word of it. Helena is the one to answer all his questions, and even the one to tell him how intense the pain is. (How she could possibly know that, you have no idea.) You're very lucky to have someone who knows you so well. Someone who will go talk to your parents for you knowing that the last thing you want is for them to see you like...this. And someone who will willingly put up with you when you're irritable due to pain.
"Just remember to keep breathing, love," Helena whispers reassuringly. She lets you squeeze her hand tightly until the contraction passes. "Just breath."
"Right, breath," you repeat panting. "Ugh! How much longer is this going to last!"
She pushes some damp hair off your forehead. "Not much longer, darling, not much longer."
Turns out soon was not soon enough. It seemed like a life time of waiting and unimaginable pain before finally you heard the unmistakable cries of a baby.
"Congratulations Mrs. and Mrs. Bering-Wells," the doctor says after cleaning him off and placing him in Helena's ready arms.
You lean your head back against the bed and try to catch your breath. Tears are streaming out the corners of your eyes, and they only intensify when you feel Helena lean over next to you.
"Hello baby boy," she greets your still screaming baby with a motherly smile spread across her face. You've never seen that kind of light in her eyes before. "Would you like to meet your Mommy?"
Helena catches your wet eyes briefly before handing the small bundle over to you. For a moment you can't breath, you can barely think properly. You are holding your son in your arms, your son. A small, wonderful piece of you, with his own arms and legs and mind. Nothing else matters anymore, but him. But keeping him safe, loving him with all you are, raising him to be the magnificent young man you're sure he'll become. Your son. Your little Ethan. "Hi there," you breath grinning widely at him. "It's nice to finally meet you."
"I'll say," Helena agrees easily sitting down in the space you've left for her on the small bed. She runs her hand across his head as you rock him lightly and the crying comes to a quiet stop. "There you go, darling," she whispers to him.
His eyes open up finally to reveal two very large, very green orbs staring up at the two of you. "Oh my goodness..." you sigh.
"He has your eyes, my dear," Helena tells you as her smile brightens. She turns to you and leans in to kiss you longingly. She pulls back with that same smile and says to you. "I secretly hoped he would."
You place a kiss to her cheek. "And I hope he has your inventing tendencies."
"But I thought you hated my workspace," she accuses lightheartedly.
"And you'll continue to think I do, this is simply a special occasion," you explain adjusting your son in your arms.
"Oh it most definitely is," she nods as his tiny hand grips her finger tightly. "It most definitely is."
You have another moment of just your son and your wife before the family is barging through the door. You don't even know if that many people are allowed in here, but the moment the doctor sees the look in your father and Mr. Wells eyes, they decide not to protest.
"Oh my, Myka, H.G," your mother lets out the words breathlessly. "He's gorgeous."
You let her take him from your arms, grandparents have their rights too after all.
Mrs. Wells stands next to her closely, lightly placing a hand under his head. "He's perfect."
"The first grandchild," Mr. Wells mutters in disbelief. "Warren, my friend, we are getting old."
Yes, you beat Joseph, Helena's oldest brother, to the first grandchild card by a couple months.
You notice Helena clutch her locket tightly as he is passed carefully from family member to family member. You aren't in any better shape, biting your lip so hard you know you'll taste blood in a moment. They are gentle with him and they know how to hold a baby, you know that, but you're still on edge for some reason.
"You know who he strangely looks like?" Mrs. Wells throws the question out. She doesn't wait for a response. "Edward."
Ed's eyes along with everyone else's in the rooms eyes go wide. "Me? But he's Myka's," Ed reminds her.
Mrs. Wells shakes her head. "I know, I know, but-"
"Dear, I believe you're right," Mr. Wells speaks up, jumping on board. "But that's not possible..."
You share a nervous glance with Helena; you never did tell them exactly how you became pregnant.
"Boys," Mr. Wells voice is firm as he turns to his sons. "None of you...donated anything, am I correct?"
"Yes sir," they all say in shock.
"Then how..." your mother turns to you both confused, it's obvious now to everyone that the baby looks like a Wells and a Bering. Up until now you thought all babies looked alike, having one of your own shows you other wise.
"It's complicated, we aren't really sure how either, and we aren't exactly allowed to explain," Helena says cryptically and quickly.
"Right..." your farther trials and he looks down at your son. "Something tells me I don't want to know how, I'm just happy to have a grandchild. Congratulations, girls."
"Thanks Dad," you choke getting teary again. Stupid hormones.
After every family member has held the small bundle and cooed some words of welcome, they finally decide you need some rest. As they're walking out, Charles and Tracy hover for just a moment. "You had better tell us what really happened," Trace mumbles hugging you.
"Unless you want the worst sibling revenge ever to rain down on your heads," Charles adds darkly, with that curious Wells glint in his eye.
And then you are alone at last, Helena laying next to you and your son in between you, drifting off slowly. You watch him for a while, memorizing every little aspect of his sleeping face. Helena's hand brushes the little hair he has on his head lightly and chuckles when he shifts. Your eyes meet and she smiles at you brightly, "He's wonderful."
"Yes, he is," you agree. "Then again what did we expect, he is your son."
"And yours, love," she says as if you needed reminding.
"I love you," you whisper edging forward as much as you can to kiss her.
She meets you halfway, and the moment before your lips touch she murmurs back. "I love you too, forever and ever."
Life isn't simple, but some could argue that it is made up of simple moments. Moments you can't explain, but last a lifetime. Moments that hold so much meaning and so many emotions that it's hard to remember that it is just a moment. A mere moment in time.
You have been alive for twenty-three years, you have know your wife for seventeen years, you've been involved with her romantically for seven years, you've been married to her for five years, and you've been a mother for almost three hours. Within each of those timespans there have been hundreds of thousands of moments, and you remember every single one. It's a curse and a gift, your memory, you can easily recall your first kiss with her, yet at the same time you can just as easily recall your first fight. The pain and the healing, the bliss and the fall, her face of love towards you and that face of flirtation towards that boy freshman year.
Life isn't simple. And you would argue that the moments that make up life aren't simple either. They are complex, fragile things that make up a person's whole self. People are defined by their actions and actions cannot occur without moments. And while you can rarely control the things that happen in your life, you can control your actions. You control what makes you you.
Helena is your wife because you love her more than every star in the sky and every grain of sand on the earth. You didn't feel in control of the love that sprung between the two of you, but you responded with the purest actions you could find.
You have a son because some freaky beehive lady decided you needed one. You didn't control the object that she gave you and you had no control over what happened to your body afterwords, but you did control how you reacted (though it seemed as if you couldn't at the time).
Those two circumstances define you, and you couldn't have those circumstances without her. If your actions revolve around her then so do the moments which allow those actions to happen. Meaning those moments revolve around her, and if your moments revolve around her and those moments are what make up your life then your life revolves around her.
But now you have Ethan. Your son and hers.
He is a part of her, so logically speaking your life revolves around the both of them now.
And it isn't until you realize this that you realize you made the right choice in having him. Helena's knows you better than you know yourself, how could you believe she may not be right about this too?