Part II
Chapter Thirty-three
Lovely
Alyssa sat on the living room couch in her house. Sam's head was on her lap, his eyes shut peacefully. She ran her hands through his ruffled dark hair. He smiled.
"He's kicking." He said softly.
"I know." She said, beaming.
He kissed the curve of her tummy.
She stroked his face tenderly. "You make me feel so brave, Sam. I should be so scared right now. Our lives are about to be turned upside down. But you make me feel safe."
He sat up, feathering kisses along her neck. She cradled his head on her hands, bringing his face to hers. He kissed her gently, curling his fingers with hers. Then he buried his face in the hollow of her neck, his palms perfectly molded to her belly. She closed her eyes and covered his hands with hers.
The feeling was indescribable.
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It was probably after 11. But Alyssa was still awake. She sat in Sam's kitchen, drinking hot cocoa and reading a book. The house was completely quiet. Everyone else was asleep.
She wanted to see him, though. So she stayed up. When she heard the purr of his car engine outside she put her book down on the table and got up excitedly. His headlights dimmed and she waited for him at the door.
He opened the door and was surprised when she threw herself in his startled arms. "Hi." He said with a smile on his face.
"Hi." She replied.
He pulled out of the hug and wrapped his arms around her waist. His eyes were locked with hers. "Isn't it a little late to be up?"
"No! I always stay up."
He rubbed her belly. "You know what I mean."
"I wanted to see you. I've missed you."
He kissed her cheek. "You have to start taking care of yourself."
She placed her hands on his chest lovingly. "I feel fine." She pecked his lips. "You on the other hand, look like shit."
He laughed softly. "Thanks."
"You shouldn't work so much."
"We need the money. You know Peter doesn't want to help me out."
"But you're exhausted." She looked at his dark circles.
"A few late nights won't kill me." He smiled.
She traced the outline of his face. "It makes me sad."
He smirked. "At this point everything makes you sad."
"I can't help it if my hormones are all out of whack."
"Yeah, I guess that's my fault." He said.
"Totally. If you had kept it in your pants I would not be this emotional and this fat right now."
He laughed. "You wanted to have sex!"
"You could have said no."
"I couldn't possibly deny you of physical pleasure." He mocked her.
She giggled.
"You're not fat by the way." He whispered.
"Not yet."
He kissed her.
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"Do you think…do you wanna get married?" Sam asked hesitantly.
She opened her eyes. "Sam…we're still teenagers."
"Our little boy deserves married parents."
"But it'll be a lie. We'll be married because we have a kid, not because we love each other."
"I love you. You love me."
"Sam, do you honestly think we'll be together the rest of our lives? I mean realistically. You're 17. Who's to say that in five years you won't get tired of me and fall in love with someone else?"
He was silent and she feared she had hurt him again. He spoke softly. "I'll always love you, Alyssa."
"Love isn't enough, Sam. My mom loved my dad."
"I'll never hurt you or our child. Never. You can trust me. Not all guys are drunken wife beaters."
"I know. But I still can't get rid of the thought that we'll fall out of love. I mean now we don't have worries. But when we're adults and have responsibilities, who's to say we won't get tired of it?"
"I'll never be tired of you. I'll love you the way I do right now forever. Nothing is going to change that." He paused. "Are you having doubts…about us?"
"No."
"You just don't think you'll always love me."
She turned around so she was facing him and looked into his eyes. The look in the blue-green depths was heart-rending. "That's not what I meant."
He looked at her slightly crestfallen. "I know I'm not the person you imagined yourself with. You remind me every day."
"Sam…I couldn't imagine myself with anyone else. And you are good enough for me. I never said you weren't. I'm lucky to have you."
"But you just can't see us together later on. Tell me something and be honest. If it wasn't for this baby would you still be with me?"
She ran the back of her hand down his cheek. "Of course I would. Do you know how much I missed you when I was at my dad's?" She rested her palm over his heart. "You've done more for me than any guy ever has. You're the first boyfriend I've had who's loved me."
He cradled her head in his hands and covered her mouth with his. She kissed him back slowly. Then she laid her body along his, her head tucked under his chin. He rubbed her tummy affectionately.
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Sam should have been so miserable. He went to school and worked five days a week. He had to grow up a lot faster than guys his age. But it didn't really matter if he had her.
It was already 7:30. Her cell phone buzzed and she answered it.
"How's our little one?"
She smiled. "Fine. I think he's sleeping. He was very active today. But I think he knew mommy had homework to do."
Sam laughed softly.
"How was work?"
"The usual. This old hag flipped out on me because I put her soda and water in the same bag. Apparently everything has to be separated."
Alyssa giggled. "You wanna come over?"
"Already have."
'What?"
'Window."
She looked out her bedroom window. He stood on the grass in a black hoodie, her porch lights reflecting in his eyes, making his face seem all the more warm.
She smiled down at him rubbing the subtle swell of her tummy. He beamed.
Alyssa walked down her stairs and met him. He molded his hand over her belly and chuckled when he felt shifting under his palm. He stroked her face and captured her lips in a deep, sweet kiss.
Later they lay on her bed, Sam leaning against her headboard and Alyssa reclined along him. They were skimming some baby names books.
"Charles." Sam said jokingly.
"Edgar."
"Francois." He suggested.
"Oh my god, Lumiere!" Alyssa shouted excitedly.
They both laughed. "We have to think of ones that won't be made fun of constantly."
"So you don't think Fonsworth is appropriate?" She feigned seriousness.
Sam smirked.
She paused thoughtfully and her lips curled sweetly. "Sam."
He grinned wryly. "Right cause I totally want my kid to be named Samuel Monroe the second. That doesn't sound formal at all."
Alyssa was quiet for a moment. "Jacob. I've always loved that name."
"I like that."
"Well it's settled then." She closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of his hands over her belly.
She shifted in his arms and noticed that he had fallen sleep. She loved that when she watched him sleep he finally seemed at peace. There had been so many days when she looked upon that face and all she saw was pain. But in the last few months the only thing she saw on his face was happiness. And it made her happy.
She pulled the covers over them and wrapped her arms around him, soaking herself in the warmth of his body. The honey-teak scent of him made her eyes heavy and she let dreams of their future life together take her to oblivion.