The Starr Chronicles

To todd fan: Hey there todd fan! I read the new chapter of "Mutants in Tights" and I loved it! It was hilarious! I'm glad you liked the Kelly and Duncan torture in the last chapter! I try to include some Kelly torture and some Duncan torture in every chapter so the readers can have something fun to read.

To soulstress: Hey there soulstress! I'm glad you liked the last chapter! Yes, Pyro set the house on fire. Well, the whole house hasn't gone up in smoke yet. Keep that in mind. Yeah, Toad packed the Cosmic Axe. You don't leave something like the Cosmic Axe lying around, especially when Pyro is in the house. I understand that sometimes a computer can be a real pain. There are times when I wanted to throw my laptop, where I do all my story-writing, out the window and/or get it intimately acquainted with a sledgehammer. Anyway, I hope your computer behaves and allows you to keep on reviewing. Enjoy the new chapter, and I can hardly wait for the new chapter of "Tempest"!

To Raliena: Hey there Rae! Yes, the truce has started, and I am also counting the seconds into it ends. Oh, I see what movie you mean. You were talking about King Kong. I get it now. I see. Well, Vince is right now a giant metal dinosaur, not an ape. Either way, he will go down. Enjoy the new chapter!

To Red Witch: Hey there Red Witch! I read your new one-shots and your fic "Welcome to the Dark Side" and I loved them! Great stuff! Hopefully, I'll be able to give both Todd and Althea shots at Vincent. I'll see what I can do for that. Here's some more insanity for you! I hope you like it, and enjoy the new chapter!

Disclaimer: "Bud…Bud…Bud…" - Budweiser Frog #1

Chapter 35: Interview with a Virus!

The Brotherhood House, Bayville

"Hello, Joe's Tavern?" St. John Allerdyce, the Australian pyromaniac known as Pyro snickered as he used the phone to make a crank call.

"Yeah, this is Joe. What do you want?" The voice said on the other end.

"I'm looking for a Miss Hugandkiss. First name: Amanda. Could you get her on the phone, please? I need to talk to her." John struggled to hold his laughter in.

"I'll see." Joe said. He was heard calling for her. "I'm looking for Amanda Hugandkiss! Hey! Is there an Amanda Hugandkiss here! Hello? I need Amanda Hugandkiss!"

"You sure do!" A smart-alec patron was heard exclaiming on the other end. Laughter erupted from the phone, joined by John's own laughter.

"Oh you think you're funny, huh kid?" Joe's snarl was heard from the phone. "You think you're a regular Steve Allen, huh? Well let me tell you something, boy! You better not let me find you, because if I do, I will break every bone in your body, rip you in half, and sell your parts on eBay!" John slammed the phone down on the receiver, laughing his head off.

"Man, that was great!" John whooped. Meanwhile, the plume of smoke from Pietro's room had grown in size.

A warehouse in Miami

"Uhn…huh…" Althea opened her eyes. She found herself in a dark room. "Where am I?" She felt herself sitting down on a chair. She tried to get up, but realized she was tied down. "What?! Where am I?! Let me go!" She struggled against her bonds.

"Forgive me darling for the rough treatment." A familiar English-accented voice said as Vince emerged from the shadows. "But I had to make sure you'd listen to me."

"Vincent, have you gone crazy?!" Althea exclaimed.

"Althea, please!" Vince begged. "I have to make sure you're safe from that filthy peon amphibian."

"What's Todd ever done to you?!" Althea exclaimed.

"He's trying to steal you from me!" Vince exclaimed back. "Althea, you mean the world to me. He's not right for you. He's stupid, he smells bad, he has terrible fashion sense, and he's basically just human scrap!"

"Todd is a nice guy who's never gotten a break, Vince." Althea said. "Everyone has shunned him, judging him based on his looks. He's got a good heart, Vince. And here's something else. You want to talk about human scrap, let's talk about you! Your father sees you as a living get-rich-quick scheme, you're arrogant, you're a jerk, and you think you rule the world! I never liked you, Vince! The only person who's ever liked you is you."

"At least I am better-looking than him." Vince snorted.

"Looks don't matter, Vince. Todd's nice to me, and I do like him. He's not perfect, Vince…but who is?"

"I am!" Vince snapped. "I'm better for you, Althea! I'm rich! I got looks! I'm a man people want to be like! That…Toad is a man that people wish never existed! What does he have? A stench that makes milk curdle, miscreant friends that secretly do not want him around, and a face that frightens children!"

"Todd's not an arrogant lunatic like you!" Althea screamed. "Stop this, Vince. If you think that getting rid of Toad will prove your worth to me, you are wrong! All it'll get you is time in jail…" She gave Vince a hard look. "And I will hate you even more than I do now. You proved something to me right now. You are a spoiled brat who can't stand it if things go your way." Vince could barely contain his rage. "You're nothing but a little virus, Vince. You're an annoying little bug that has no clue when to go away." Vince snarled.

"I'll show you, Althea!" Vince exclaimed. "I'll show you which of us is more worthy of you!" Vince stomped off.

"Yeah, use a big metal dinosaur to fight Todd. Shows how tough you are." Althea mumbled. While she and Vince were talking, Althea was using a pocketknife she kept in her pocket to try and cut the rope binding her.

Bayville High locker room

"Alright, boys!" Duncan Matthews was in his football uniform. He was pacing up and down in front of his fellow players, who were sitting on a bench, also in uniform. Duncan looked like a general. "We are going to take Middletown downtown! What're we gonna do?!"

"Dominate!" The players roared.

"What else are we gonna do?!"

"WIN!!"

"And THEN?!" Duncan asked loudly.

"Rock the cheerleaders' worlds!" The players whooped.

"Let's do it!!" Duncan yelled out. He and the players rushed out to the door. When Duncan opened the door… "AAAAAAGH!!!! NOT AGAIN!!! STUPID DOGS!!!" A pack of wild dogs leapt and Duncan and started mauling him.

Bayville Park

"Ahhh…A nice day to read in the park." Principal Kelly smiled as he sat down in the park, his back on a tree. He happily opened up his novel and started reading. Kelly didn't realize he was under a branch, and that branch had a beehive hanging from it.

"Hey look out!" Someone exclaimed. A Frisbee hit the beehive, causing it to fall from the branch and land on Kelly's lap.

"AAAAAAAAGH!!!!!" Kelly screamed as he got attacked by a swarm of enraged bees. "HELP ME!!! MAMA!!!! OWWWW!!!!! BEES HURT!!! HELP ME!!!!"

Well, well, well! Looks like Vince and Althea had a nice talk! What insanity will happen next? What are our heroes doing? Will Althea escape? Will our heroes save the day? Find out in the next chapter! Suggestions needed badly!