Author's Note: A few lines in this part were borrowed from the Season One episode Toy House.
Part 36
Max was awake before dawn broke, his eyes staring unseeingly at the ceiling above. His mind was turning over the events of the night before, too active to allow him to sleep. He felt like he was trapped in his sister's insane Christmas village, dancing to whatever tune she chose to play. He wasn't interested in wrangling reindeer, he didn't want to answer questions from a bunch of curious children, and he really didn't want to wear that stupid costume she had come up with. He loved her but at the moment he could've happily choked her with her stupid cranberry and popcorn garland.
He wasn't a Grinch, despite popular belief. He just wasn't interested in having anything to do with Christmas or children. He didn't want to run the risk of repeating last Christmas. He had nearly ruined the holiday for Liz. He had been so wrapped up in trying to get through to Samuel in an effort to establish contact with his son. He was doing okay with Maggie and that probably had a lot to do with her adopting Michael and following him around faithfully. Being Santa's reindeer wrangler was going to put him in constant contact with children and he didn't want to do it.
He smiled faintly at the memory of holding his son, already several months old, for the first time. Zan was a good looking boy and he had a smile Max had recognized from pictures of himself when he was younger. Letting his son go had hurt more than anything he had ever experienced. He still wondered if things had been different and he'd been able to keep Zan with him if it would've cost him Liz. The thing with Tess had been rough enough to get past, but having to stare a living reminder in the face every day… could she have done that? Would she have wanted to?
Part of him was relieved that the decision had been taken out of his hands. It wasn't taken out of your hands, his inner voice spoke up. Liz's voice followed soon after. "Everything's a choice, Max. The options may not be that great but it's still a choice." She was right. He didn't like to think about it too much, but she was right. He had given Zan up to keep him safe because the other option was to be selfish and keep him and he couldn't rationalize that in his head. Not while his own existence was being threatened. He just didn't know what his choice would've been if keeping him wouldn't have put Zan's life in danger.
How could he have chosen between his son and the woman he loved? His mind locked on the memory of his son's smiling face and he swallowed hard, trying to force down the lump in his throat. He had felt like his heart was being ripped from his chest when he had let his son go and he reached up to unconsciously rub his chest as his vision blurred. He had barely had the chance to meet Zan before he'd had to give him up and that gaping hole in his chest still hurt. He shifted and brought his right arm up to rest his head on it, dropping his gaze to his left hand where it lay on his stomach.
He raised his hand slightly, his thumb turning his wedding band on his finger. His thoughts shifted as his thumb brushed over the nick in the band, a reminder of a hot day in August. More proof that six adults packed into an old van and living in such close quarters wasn't a good idea. His thumbnail caught on the nick and he picked at it as his memory took him back to that day. It had all started because of an argument over where they had stopped for the night. He winced and flexed his hand as he mentally pictured the scene. It was a phantom pain, induced by the memory; he had healed it himself so he knew there was no internal damage.
They had found an out of the way campground and paid for a site where the fewest campers were likely to be. When they had stopped originally they had planned to head back out after Kyle had finished working on the van. He had finally convinced Michael that he had to replace the pads and shoes before they did anymore damage to the rotors because the brakes had been squealing for more than a month and it was getting worse. He had been working on replacing the rear brake pads when Michael had crouched down beside him and demanded to know how much longer it would be before they could leave.
"Look, we're already here," Kyle said as he shifted around so he could look up at Michael. "We've already paid for the site, let's just hang here for the night. We're in the middle of nowhere and I don't know about everyone else, but I could use a break from smelling everyone for a few hours."
"He's right, Michael," Maria had chimed in, getting up and brushing the dirt from the seat of her shorts. "We've been locked in heat wave hell for the past three days and I for one would like to not spend the night sweating and pressed up against anyone else."
"We need to keep movin'," he snapped.
"No, we need to stay here for the night and take advantage of a shower. At this point I don't care if that means taking a bath in the river or lake or whatever we're next to, but I'm not getting back in that van tonight."
"This isn't up for discussion. We agreed to stop long enough for Kyle to fix the damn brakes." He ran a hand through his hair as he started pacing in agitation.
"I'm not gonna stand here and argue with you about this," she said, leaning forward and snatching the keys that were dangling from his front pocket. "We're staying here tonight. I know you wanna get back on the road, and we will, but we'll do it after we've had a chance to air out. I'm sick of sweating all day long and then sleeping in clothes that're all slimy and gritty from sweating in them."
He had only gotten angrier at her outburst. "You'd rather stay here and run the risk of getting caught?"
"Yes, Michael," she snapped sarcastically, "that's exactly what I meant."
"Maybe Michael's right," Isabel said as she tapped her thumbnail against her bottom lip. "It's only been four days since we got pulled over for that taillight. The cop let us go with a warning, but it couldn't hurt to put more distance between us and – "
"We've put two states between us!" Maria yelled.
Liz had been sitting on the ground, reading through the manual and handing Kyle tools as he needed them. He didn't really need any help, but she didn't have anything else to do and it gave her something to do. "We should just stay for the – "
"Maybe we should just stay out of it," Max interrupted. He had been watching her with Kyle for the past hour and his irritation had notched up when she pushed her hair behind her ear and laughed at something Kyle said. It wasn't even funny and it sure as hell wasn't that funny.
She had taken offense to his tone and she had got up to face him, her hand resting on the open side door to the van. "If you wanna stay out of it, stay out of it. We've all got a say in what goes on and I'm with Maria on this one. We need a night out of the van. We've put almost two thousand miles between us and that damn stop, we've changed the plates, and we've changed the paint job."
"If anyone cares, I'd be okay with stayin' here tonight," Kyle spoke up.
"No one cares," Max bit out.
"Get off of his case, Max," Maria muttered.
"Don't tell him what to do," Liz argued.
And from there it had all gone to hell. The argument had blown up all out of proportion for no reason other than they were hot, exhausted, and in desperate need of a break from each other. Maria and Michael had gone off on each other and everyone else until Maria had thrown the keys. It hadn't been intentional; she was just very energetic when she was… well, when she was doing pretty much anything, and when she had thrown her hand out in an erratic gesture the keys had gone flying.
"I told you we should've just stayed out of it," Max mumbled, shaking his head at Michael's expression.
The guy looked like he was about to burst multiple blood vessels at the same time. He had gone bright red and that forehead vein had started throbbing in tandem with the muscle in his jaw ticking rhythmically. Maria had looked contrite, but it was too late to take that pitch back and it was way too late to put a lid on Michael's temper.
"Just pick a side, Max," Liz snapped. "Let's put it to a vote and decide whether to stay for the night or go."
"This's ridiculous."
"It is ridiculous," she said as she reached inside and grabbed one of the sleeping bags and threw it at him. "We're staying here. Like Maria, I'd like to shower, bathe, whatever, before climbing back in this thing and roasting for the next two thousand miles."
"I don't even know why we're arguing about this."
Kyle had stood up, wiping his hands on a rag. "I think it's safe to say – "
"Shut up!"
"No one was askin' you!"
Max and Liz stared at each other when they both yelled at Kyle at the same time and before he could draw a breath Liz went off on him.
"There's no reason for you to talk to him like that!" She leaned inside and grabbed one of the tents, turning to drop it on the ground as she reached for her bag. "He didn't do anything to you."
"He didn't do anything… Really?" His tone had intentionally been baiting. They had avoided that topic the same way they generally avoided the topics of Tess and Zan. She hadn't had sex with Kyle. That much had been clear the night they had made love for the first time. He wasn't an idiot; she had been a virgin on their wedding night. It didn't erase the image of her in bed with Kyle though. It did nothing to answer the question about why the other guy had been in her bed and they had been naked. But he hadn't wanted to bring it up and ruin their time together and living with four other people twenty-four hours a day didn't really give them much of a chance to deal with their tumultuous past. Not that either of them was rushing to deal with it anyway.
"Don't start with me, Max. We're all tired and we're staying here tonight." She took a step back and grabbed the door handle, putting all of her weight behind it as she gave it a shove.
Max automatically turned and stuck his hand out to stop the door, realizing too late to jerk his hand back just how stupid that move was. He'd gotten his hand slammed in car doors before but the van was not one of these light fiberglass cars made today. He had felt the bones break as the sliding door pinned his hand and he had stared at it in shock.
"Oh my God, Max!" Liz had run to the door and fumbled with it, crying heavily and unable to get a grip on the handle.
Kyle had pushed her out of the way and pulled the handle and hauled the door back, and his coloring had turned grey when he saw Max's hand. "I'm not sure Buddha has a quote for this one," he mumbled under his breath.
Michael had come back with the keys he had finally located and his fight with Maria had stalled out when they saw what had happened. "Max, can you heal that?" he asked, wincing at the mangled mess of the obviously broken hand.
"He can heal it," Isabel said as she grabbed her brother's arm and turned him around to sit on the floor of the van. "Max, you're gonna need to focus on that hand."
He had healed his hand and he had felt every moment of it as the bones came back together and muscle and sinew was repaired. It had been a draining experience but it had solved the argument about whether they were staying at the campground that night and the argument between him and Liz had been forgotten. She had spent the rest of the evening fussing over him and making sure he was comfortable.
Max smiled as he ran his thumb over the nick again. She had felt so guilty over that for a long time and it hadn't even been her fault. He was the one who had stupidly tried to stop that heavy door by sticking his hand in its path. What the hell was I thinking? His expression sobered as he pictured his little boy's sweet face again and he shifted restlessly. A year ago he had been obsessed with finding Zan and when the boy had come into his life it had been so brief. His son would have no memory of him and how would his adoptive parents explain his biological parents' absence? Would he think he was the product of an unwanted pregnancy? Would he wonder why he hadn't been good enough for them to keep? He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, wishing, hoping, maybe praying, he didn't know, that his son would grow up loved, secure, and confident in who he was and his place in the world.
He couldn't be there for his son but he hoped Zan had ended up with parents like Mom and Dad, people who would love him unconditionally. He swallowed and reached up to rub the bridge of his nose. His parents had loved him like that and he had somehow missed it. Isabel had known from the beginning, she had trusted them. Had it been instinctual? Intuition? For all of his thoughts about Michael being so closed off and unable to connect with others he was the same way. He had grown up in an environment that was warm and loving, provided with everything he could ever need and then some, and he had never wanted for anything, but he had still shut his parents out.
He shook his head at the path his thoughts were taking, unable to stop them from taking him to a park bench in the center of Roswell. He could clearly see the pain in his mom's eyes as she had practically begged him to talk to her. Earlier he had accused her of investigating him when all she had been doing was trying to understand, and then he had walked out on her. He had pushed her away and made her think she and Dad weren't enough, that he didn't see them as his real parents.
He had tried to assure her that nothing could be further from the truth, that she and Dad were enough. I should've tried harder, he realized.
"Max… nothing you are could ever turn me away from you. I mean… I love you. And you're my son. Do you understand that?"
"Yeah."
But he hadn't, not really. I understand now, Mom. He had begged her to trust him but he had given her nothing in return. He had given her just enough to make her back off and stop pushing him for answers. His offer to leave had come from a sense of self-preservation from a threat that didn't exist. Dad had inadvertently become a threat only because he had started an investigation into his only son who had become ultra secretive and suddenly started acting so out of character. All I had to do was trust them and I couldn't. Please don't let him make the same mistakes I made, he thought, not even knowing who or what he expected to be listening.
His son, six months, and thousands of miles had given him perspective but it was too little too late. His parents had been his home, they had been his very foundation, and he had been blind to it. How had he not seen it? Isabel had seen it from the first moment, she had taken one look at Philip and Diane Evans and she had known she was home.
Liz rubbed the side of her face against her pillow, reluctant to give in to the dim light beginning to filter in through the window but being pulled to consciousness anyway. She blinked a few times to clear her vision and the movement of Max's left hand caught her attention and she watched his thumb as it turned his wedding ring around his finger. Her gaze lifted to his face and she studied his expression, seeing the pain in it even before the weak light illuminated the track a single tear had created high on his cheekbone as it had traveled to its final destination. She swallowed with difficulty, knowing that it had to be thoughts of his son that had allowed the tear to not only form, but to escape.
She knew thoughts of Zan had to haunt him and she was torn about how to deal with it. He had buried his feelings and thoughts about his son, doing everything he could to spare her feelings. It wasn't fair to him to have to bottle up his emotions about his son and there was a part of her that wanted to tell him it was okay to talk about Zan, to just let his pain and grief over that loss out so that he could deal with it openly. She had overheard him one night when they had been camping out in Wyoming… maybe it was Idaho… at some point the states had started to run together.
She had woken up and realized that he wasn't beside her. After the momentary sense of panic she had heard the quiet murmur of voices and realized the campfire was still burning. She could still smell the scent of the fire and hear the sound of crickets chirping intermingled with the snapping and popping of the twigs and limbs they were burning. She had crept closer to the opening of the tent and pushed the flap aside with her forefinger as she peered outside. Max had been sitting on a log next to Maria, their voices hushed as they talked quietly. After a few moments their words had started to filter in and she had been able to decipher what they were saying.
"Max, you've gotta talk to her," Maria said with a concerned glance at him. "Keeping it all inside – "
"I can't, Maria." He dropped his head forward and scrubbed his hands through his hair, leaving it standing up in places. "You know what I put her through last year. Talking about it now…" he shook his head. "I can't put her through that again."
She bumped his shoulder. "You're gonna have to. You guys are gonna have to deal with that whole Tess and Zan thing, girlfriend."
"Maybe you can get back to me after you and Michael discuss that whole Billy and Courtney thing," he said, his tone gently mocking.
"Touche'." Maria sighed and poked the fire with the long branch she was holding, watching as tiny fiery sparks flew up to dance on the air before burning out and disappearing. "I don't even know how to talk about that with him." She bit her lip and turned her head to look at him.
"Don't look at me, girlfriend," he said with a small smile. "I don't know either. Liz doesn't wanna talk about it anymore than I do."
"She has to know how much you're hurting over giving him up, Max. She can see it… she can feel it, I know she can. Hell, even if Michael and I aren't talking about something that's bothering him I know it's there and it hurts when he keeps it to himself." She nodded at the man prowling around on the opposite side of their campsite. "Even now he's on edge because we're on the run, we've had run-ins with cops and the FBI, and he can't relax. It's like he's on an adrenaline high and he can't come down… and he won't talk to me about it."
He lifted his gaze to look at Michael. "It's not the same thing, Maria. I slept with Tess and I got her pregnant."
"And when she brought your son to you," she reached out to touch his arm, "you had to turn around and give him away. I know it's not easy for her either, but, Max, you held Zan in your arms…"
Max smiled softly. It was nice to hear someone say his name without hesitation. "You know, you hear people talk about babies smelling so sweet." He shook his head and held his hands out to stare at them. "I never thought much about it until I held him, but they do. There's so much innocence and purity…" he swallowed hard, choking on the lump in his throat, "so much trust." He looked away. "And I just… I gave him to complete strangers."
"Max, girlfriend, you had to do what was best for him," she assured him as she hugged him tightly.
She had crawled back into her sleeping bag and pretended to be asleep when he had finally come to bed. He had never mentioned it and she had left it alone, feeling a mixture of guilt and relief that he had confided in Maria.
The first streaks of light were beginning to creep across the sky and filter into the bedroom, highlighting his features. Her eyes traced over his upper body, bare from the waist up. She reached out and let her fingers follow the path her eyes had taken and she looked up in time to see his lips lift in a slight smile.
"Hey," she whispered, "you wanna talk about what's on your mind?"
He shook his head and covered her hand with his. "Just thinkin' about the day I nicked my wedding ring."
She winced at the memory and she turned her hand over under his, linking their fingers together. "Nothing else on your mind?"
He studied her eyes for a minute before shaking his head reluctantly. "If you can think of a way for me to get outta dressing up like a big green elf I'd appreciate it."
"I know the costume sucks," she said, coming up on an elbow and resting her chin in her hand. "It is hideous, and to be honest, I'm not that thrilled with mine either, but I think Kyle's right, Max."
"I think Kyle's right…" He forced his mind to drop that thought and to focus on what she was saying because it concerned his sister. "Just give in on this one?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.
"It's all she has and as long as she's focused on Christmas it'll give her a mental break and God knows she needs it too."
He grumbled under his breath and nodded. "Alright, but just for the record I don't like it. That stupid costume's a nightmare and I can't even begin to tell you how not excited I am about the whole reindeer thing."
Her thumb traced over his skin and she smiled at him, waggling her eyebrows playfully. "Got any reindeer wrangler moves you wanna show me?"
Max chuckled and rolled onto his side, nudging her over onto her back. "Might have one or two." He smiled as his fingers trailed over her face. "And as long as we don't have to worry about Santa comin' down the chimney to surprise us I might just show 'em to you."
"I think Snowflake's got him adequately distracted," she said with a wink. "Ya know," she moved to straddle him, slowly bending down to brush her lips against his, "this elf's gonna have to rely on Santa's handsome and strong reindeer wrangler…"
"Have you seen the tights, Liz?"
Her voice lowered to a husky murmur. "Um-hmm, I've seen them. Bet they're gonna be rather form-fitting." Her eyes traced over his bare chest before she leaned down for a chaste kiss. She lifted her head, releasing his lips, and her hair fell forward to brush against his skin. Her eyes locked with his as one of her hands began to search beneath the covers. "Hmm… what do you think will be on my mind all day while I'm watching you run around in those tights that outline every – " She squeaked when he hissed and suddenly rolled her over onto her back. His eyes were dark and filled with a hunger that stirred every womanly desire she possessed. Her arms went up around his shoulders as his hips settled into familiar territory and she looked up at him, licking her lips as he positioned himself over her.
She reached up to touch his face and he caught her wrist, his eyes never breaking contact with hers as he sank into her with a soft groan.
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Isabel lay on her back in bed and stared at the picture in her hand. It was a picture that had been taken during their trip to Vegas. It was the only picture she had from home because when she had been grabbing a few things in anticipation of running she had taken it by mistake. Tess had been removed from the photograph, her countenance wiped away with a simple brush of her fingertip. She wished she could go back and change things, remove the threat that Tess had been, and hold onto her life and the people she cared about who had slipped through her fingers.
She brushed the pad of her thumb over the smiling faces and she swallowed past the lump in her throat as her gaze stayed on Alex's face long enough for her vision to blur. She blinked the tears away and focused on Kyle instead. He could be such a clown when it suited him, but there was a depth to him that so many overlooked. She shifted around to get comfortable as she tapped the picture thoughtfully. Who should she visit tonight? Her finger brushed over Alex's smiling face but that tug of connection no longer existed. She smiled sadly, remembering her visit into his dreams and how special he had made her feel when she had witnessed the way he saw her.
She dismissed Liz immediately because the last time had been enough for her. Max? At one time his dreams would've centered around Liz exclusively, but these days his mind was a massive mix of confusing thoughts and images wrapped around his son, their parents, Liz of course, and at times, even dreams of his beloved wife were somehow confused with images of her and Kyle in a compromising position. Yeah, she snorted, like that would've ever happened. Hmm, no, she didn't need the drama. There was enough of that going on.
Michael? Maria? No and no, she decided. The last time she had ventured into either of their dreams she had been quick to make an escape. They both had their fears; their relationship, things in their past, being caught by the FBI, and she had stumbled into those nightmares before. But the last time the only nightmares resulting from the dreamwalk had been hers. Those dreams had been hot enough to make her blush and that wasn't something she did easily or often. At least she had been spared the embarrassment of either of them knowing she had been surfing the dreamplane because they had been too busy to notice her.
Kyle. Yeah, Kyle could be counted on to lighten the mood. He could be contemplative and serious in his dreams or he could be a clown, but either way he didn't mind that she stopped in to visit on occasion. He encouraged it, claiming to have no memory of it the next morning, although she suspected that wasn't entirely true. He knew she didn't always sleep well and there was no need to keep up the pretense with him that things were fine, that she was fine. He saw right through it anyway… something she both appreciated and hated at the same time. She shifted around to get more comfortable. The last time she had looked in on him he had been asleep, his mattress pulled out into his doorway to be closer to the heat.
Her fingertip moved over his face, her eyes drifting closed as the picture seemed to ripple under her touch. She looked around as the scenery began to materialize and after a moment the sound of a screaming crowd began to filter in and she realized she was standing on the high school football field in Roswell. To her it was no different from any other football game, but she could see by the look on his face as he looked around that it was different. She stood back, observing him as he relived a moment of glory.
His uniform was stained with sweat, dirt and grass, and his right arm was bleeding from an earlier hit he had taken, but the grin on his face said that he wasn't feeling any pain. One of the other guys gave him a shove and said something that made Kyle laugh as they took up their positions once more. He shouted out the calls, gibberish to her ears, and she absently wondered how anyone understood what he was saying.
The ball was snapped and he caught it, moving back and staying in constant motion as the field erupted in a flurry of activity. Sweat dripped down from his forehead to drip in his eyes and he blinked it away as his sharp gaze searched for the open man downfield as his teammates blocked their opponents and bought him that crucial few seconds. He spotted his open man, right where he was supposed to be, and as his arm came back the crowd packing the stadium held its collective breath. He threw the perfect pass and Tommy caught it in the air, his body hitting the ground and landing in the end zone with a bone-jarring impact that he didn't even seem to feel as he jumped back up, football held high in victory. The crowd went insane and out of all of them it was Jim Valenti's voice that stood out above all the others.
She could see the pride in the man's face as he watched his son and she smiled at the face-splitting grin on Kyle's face as he unsnapped his chinstrap and jerked his helmet off, holding it up as the scoreboard showed off the score. His teammates rushed him, carrying him off of the field on their shoulders. The air was electric with victory and she could feel just how happy Kyle was. She watched as he was finally lowered to the ground once more and his dad gave him a congratulatory hug, spreading the praise around to the other guys as well. The senior Valenti sent the boys off to the locker room, telling them to have a good time, and warning them to stay out of trouble.
"That was a good night."
She turned to look at him. At some point over the past six months he had developed the ability to separate himself from the dream, appearing as an observer, and it was during these moments that he would talk to her.
"You looked happy."
He grinned. "That was the game that took us to State. Dad was proud of me."
"Your dad was always proud of you, Kyle."
"I didn't always know it. After Mom left us he threw himself into his work even more than he had before." He kicked at a clump of dirt and grass that had been disturbed during a play and he stared out at the stadium that was nearly empty now. "I don't think my dad and I really connected until the alien invasion," he said, poking her and giving her a teasing smile. "After I was shot and Max healed me it's like it woke something up in him. I was never so glad to get away to go to football camp."
"Yeah, and you came back spouting off Buddhist quotes."
"Hey, don't knock Buddha." He laughed quietly. "Boy that really threw Dad for a loop. He had this perpetual look of confusion on his face every time I said something when I came back. You know I actually started making sense to him."
"With the Buddhist stuff?" she asked skeptically.
"Yeah, we were watchin' a game and he started yelling at one of the players to visualize. It was right before Christmas…" he sobered. "Two years ago."
Isabel swallowed hard. "When Tess…"
"Yeah." He cleared his throat and motioned to the end zone. "Did you see that pass? Had to be one of the sweetest passes in the history of the game. The pass, that's when I threw the ball…"
"I know what a pass is," she said, smacking his arm and following his lead when he changed the subject. "It was pretty impressive." She smiled and squeezed his arm when she saw the look in his eyes. "You wanna go to the party, don't you?"
"Just reliving my glory days. Not exactly baseball, but it's as close as I'll ever get to playin' left field for the Astros." He frowned. "Seems a shame to be sayin' that at 19 years old."
"I'm sorry, Kyle."
"For what?" he asked, turning his head to look at her.
"That you got caught up in this thing. That all of your dreams have been shelved because of us."
He shook his head and reached out to catch her hand. "Don't be 'cause I'm not. It's not perfect or ideal, but we belong together and it's allowed us to survive."
She looked down at their joined hands for a moment before smiling at him. "Go to your party, Kyle."
He cocked an eyebrow at her. "Wanna go? We had a lot of fun that night."
She shook her head at the boyish grin on his face. "Tempting, but I'm gonna pass. You go and enjoy yourself."
"I'll catch up with you later," he said and started to walk across the field.
She watched as he disappeared from sight and knew he'd reappear wherever the party had been that night. She had never known anyone else on the dreamscape to have that ability, but everyone's subconscious was different. Her eyes opened and she shifted, rearranging the pillows behind her and sitting up to lean back against them.
"Can't sleep, huh?"
Her head snapped up and she reached over to place the photograph on the nightstand when she saw Alex sitting on the foot of the bed. "I miss my parents. I don't even know how they're doing… if they're okay." Without a picture of them she couldn't connect to slip into their dreams and she had been in such a hurry that day that she had grabbed the wrong picture.
"You'll see them again, Isabel," he assured her with a smile.
She studied his sincere expression. "How do you know?"
"Being on this side has its advantages." He shrugged one shoulder and got up to move around the room. "Trust me, Isabel."
"You stopped coming to me…"
"After you accepted Jesse's proposal." He nodded. "You didn't need the confusion. You needed to move on."
"You didn't think he was right for me."
"No, but how could I deny you what you wanted more than anything? You wanted normal and he was a normal guy. Considerably older," he grumbled under his breath, "but normal. If I'd hung around you would've ended up feeling guilty and as much as I wanted to hang around I didn't wanna do that to you."
"You came when I needed you. That's all that matters," she said quietly.
He paused in his aimless pacing to look at her when she wiggled down under the covers. "Think you'll sleep now?" He chuckled. "You've got a big day tomorrow. If you hear laughing from the rafters it'll just be me. I can't miss out on seeing your brother dressed up as an oversized elf or Michael stuck in a Santa suit." He nodded. "Gotta say, that whole reindeer wrangler thing, now that was a stroke of genius."
"He'll be fine." She sighed and snuggled deeper into the pillows. "The kids will love him and his goofy costume."
"Um-hmm," he smiled knowingly, "so you admit it's a goofy costume."
She chuckled sleepily. "Not to him." She sighed as her eyes drifted shut. "Thanks for being here, Alex."
"Always," he promised, his hand ghosting over her cheek as she finally succumbed to sleep. He walked through the cabin once more, his gaze taking everything in. He laughed quietly at Kyle, his mattress wedged into the doorway and sleeping like a baby. He shook his head before his eyes moved back to Isabel and then he disappeared from sight.
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Maria awoke slowly, stretching before rolling over to face Michael's side of the bed. She was blinking to clear her eyes and they widened when she found him still in bed. It was the first time he had stayed in bed with her since before they broke up. Normally he was up and moving around before she awoke, in the shower or pacing around watching the time. She came up on her elbow and watched him, enjoying the rare moment to take in his sleep-softened features. After a while she shifted slightly, shivering as she pushed herself into a half-sitting position and she froze when his arm came around her, automatically seeking her out when she moved away from him.
"Hey," he rasped, his voice gravelly with sleep.
She smiled. "Hey," she said back, shivering slightly.
His right arm poked free of the covers and the fingers of his hand splayed wide as he turned it toward the fireplace and a moment later the fire came to life. He grinned with satisfaction when she giggled quietly and snuggled into his chest.
She tipped her head just enough to take a look at the clock on the nightstand, noting that it was almost 8:30am. Her thoughts wandered to breakfast, wondering if they had time to squeeze it in before they were expected to put in an appearance over at Mr. Tony's for their costume fittings. Her thoughts switched to Michael and she wondered if maybe he had forgiven her. She shifted, raising herself up to give him a kiss, relieved and hopeful when he returned it, his mobile lips soft and his kiss thorough.
Their eyes were locked on each other and though it was a moment free of the doubts about their relationship neither of them knew what exactly it meant to the other. Before either of them could consider voicing their thoughts the moment was interrupted by what sounded like several fists knocking on the front door and they jumped apart.
Michael frowned and his hand settled in the side of her neck, his thumb tracing over her jaw as he met her nervous gaze. "Stay here," he ordered gruffly. It wasn't the kind of knock associated with an invading force of FBI agents. "It's nothin' to worry about," he assured her as he rolled out of bed and pulled a pair of jeans on. He shrugged into his shirt as he walked to the front door, muttering under his breath. "Valenti, if this's a prank I swear you're in deep shit." He kicked the back leg of the chair he had wedged up under the doorknob and set it back out of sight before unlocking the door and pulling it open just enough to rest his frame in the opening and blocking Maria from view.
Edward, Brian and Eddie stood on the other side and his right eyebrow quirked when he saw them decked out in hockey gear. His eyes settled on the extra stick in Eddie's hand. "What's up, guys?"
"Thought we'd knock the puck around on the lake before we're put to work like a bunch of slaves," Edward spoke up.
"Yeah, Big Dave thought these skates would fit you," Brian said, holding up an extra pair of skates.
"Hockey, huh?"
Listening to the conversation from her warm cocoon of pillows and blankets Maria thought back to a time when Michael had friends and it warmed her heart. She smiled when he turned his head to look at her and she could see how much he wanted to go out and play. The night before she had been trying to remember the last time she had really seen him laugh and it suddenly hit her. It was that day at the Crashdown when he had come in for breakfast with Steve, Fly and Monk after their shift. Her eyes shone brightly as she freed one of her hands from beneath the covers to wave at him. "Go… I'll start breakfast in an hour."
His lips quirked in a slight smile as he thought, not if I can help it. He glanced back at the guys and nodded. "I'll be right out."