Hey all, just a short one for you this time, I have major writers block and I'm not too proud of this chapter, but here we go anyway…

As always the mention of the most amazing reviewers is essential; dreamingofsunshine, FaithfulHPReader, DigiNetaChan, hpdreamer500, Darradict, Tweetiekins, shroomy-eyes, hello-goodbye146, -Scp-, chloe's fire, supacrazyhazey, Psychokillerhoney, LiLoveheart, Opa12, RascalLil'Pixie, XXJAMESLILYXX, hptwilightlvr, JamesAndLilyForever, The DA is dressed to the nines, KatieMAGICLove.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!

JAMES

Lily looked up at me and the answer was written in her eyes, those beautiful green irises held nothing but sorrow, god the sadness was almost tangible in the air. I was choking on it.

"James…it's not…he's gone…I'm sorry,"

The words don't stick, she may as well be speaking some in other language for all the sense she was making to me. Zane wasn't dead, I had only just seen him this morning, holding Kyla's hand and winking at me as he shook my hand. I pressed my hand inside my jacket pocket and felt smooth, thin lines. I pulled it out. It was the swatch Zane had given me through our hand shake, with at least twenty different types of pinks and purples.

"James? Did you hear what I said?"

Zane wasn't dead. I wouldn't let him be,

"Move," I tell her coldly and push her hands aside, beginning to thump on his chest like I was taught in emergencies at the hospital. I counted down as I pushed on his heart and then turning his head up, clamping his nose down, I breathed air into his lungs and watched as his chest moved slightly and then fell still again.

I pounded again and again and kept breathing for him. After my fifth go, I felt his neck for a pulse and pressed my head against his chest, there was no pulse and his chest was still, eerily silent, not to mention he was starting to grow cold under my touch

"Breathe you bastard," I growled. "Zane you stupid, Slytherine bastard don't you dare do this, I am not afraid to curse you, start breathing and wake the fuck up!"

"James," Lily begins gently.

I ignore her and continue pumping away at his chest, willing some life to come back into his wide, now dull green eyes. I'm not even aware of anything else except Zane's chest, my hands and my desperate attempts to bring him back.

I work away until I'm out of breath and my arms ache from the effort. Why the hell isn't this working? Typical Slytherine, too bloody stubborn to accept help from a Griffindor.

Finally I press my head against his chest and I get my hopes up for a second that he's moved, but it's just me shaking so intensely.

"James," Lily tries again tentatively. "I don't think there's anything you can do for him now, I am so, sorry,"

I jump up as a crazy thought hits me. "My mum! She'll know what to do, we've got to take him to my mum, she can work miracles!"

Lily's eyes start to tear up and then I realise what I've said, and what it means. Uncontrollable rage starts to grip me and I have to work to keep myself under control.

"Oh James…this is so awful…I don't know what to do to make it better,"

I turn my gaze towards her and she actually takes a step back.

"I'm sorry," I tell her and even to me it sounds dead.

"What for?" she asks.

I don't reply, I just apparate, leaving her alone to face Zane's death and parents by herself. I don't even have the energy to care about my cruelty, I just grit my teeth, my goal fresh in mind. I need to find him, he needs to answer me and he needs to start acting like a man.

I burst through the door and stalk to the centre of the room, where my father lies in bed, hooked up to so many different contraptions I don't even know where he really begins and what he normally looks like.

"You need to wake up dad," I say in a surprisingly even voice. "I lost a friend today, a good friend and a good person and it was way before his time. You missed mum's funeral, you missed my graduation and so now I need you to wake up and start acting like my father because I can't do this alone and I need you."

There was no sign of movement no indication that he heard me or was even aware of my presence.

I gripped his shoulder, hard.

"Are you listening damnit? I need you to man up and be there for me, I can only do so much, be so strong, you're supposed to always be there for me, help me when I have no clue what I'm doing. God, people are dying and you're just lying there wasting away, Lily could be next, or Sirius, Remus, anyone! Don't you care?"

Again there was no response so I began shaking him, frantically.

"Wake up damn you, wake up! I thought you were a hero but you're shutting yourself away from the world, you're being a coward. Wake up and prove me wrong, fucking wake up dad!"

"James Potter!"

I whip around and the nurses have heard the commotion and come to investigate,

"I'm talking with my father," I hiss between gritted teeth and continue shaking dad's shoulders.

"Mr Potter please, you could kill him, let go at once! What do you think you're doing!"

I whip around, fists clenched, braced for a fight. "Kill him? Kill him! I wish he were dead, that way there would be a reason for his absence, one less person to worry about whether I'll ever see again!"

The nurse, Carmel, I think her name was, tip toed forward very slowly and deliberately.

"You don't mean that, you should be praying for your father, talking to him, coaxing him out of the darkness, there is still hope for him you know,"

"People are dying," I tell her flatly. "People are going to continue to die. Do you have a family?"

"Yes," she replied softly.

"Go home and kiss them, hold them tight and tell them you love them, do it every morning and every night, because if they die it's what you'll regret. I never got to say goodbye to my mum or hug her one last time, I never got to tell Zane what a great person he was and if nothing is done I may not ever see the ones I love, you may not either,"

Her hand went to her throat and terror filled her eyes. "Are you…threatening me?"

I barked out a laugh. "Lady, I'm doing you a favour. You have nothing to fear from me, I'm just a little boy playing war with his friends waiting for my parents to call me inside and tuck me into bed,"

"Oh…James…what are you saying? What are you going to do?"

I stare at my dads limp body and an unusual strength fills my body, a clarity I didn't have before, it's as though I had a veil over my eyes which has only now been lifted.

"Me? Only thing left to do; Grow up," I tell her firmly and then I apparate.

*

The station is in chaos when I arrive, the remaining students are clinging to their parents and loved ones, sobbing, screaming, crying out, their voices rise high into my head painfully, a chorus of confusion, desperation and horror. I stride past everyone, scanning the crowd for Lily, Dumbledore, anyone.

I find them in the centre, Lily has her arms wrapped around Kyla's small, shaking frame while Dumbledore speaks in soft, comforting tones to who must be Zane's parents.

"James!"

I give Lily a brisk nod and turn to Dumbledore. "Who did it? Do you know?"

Dumbledore sighed. "One can only speculate, I do fear however, that this may only just be the beginning,"

"James Potter?"

I spun around and faced Zane's mother who has his green eyes and face shape, it hurt just looking at her.

"Yes?"

She opened her mouth and then shut it almost straight after and wrapped her arms around me instead.

"Thank you," she whispered. "For being a friend to my boy,"

I clung to her, like she was my own mum, relishing the warmth and comfort I felt in her arms.

"I'm going to get who did this," I whispered back. "I'm going to make them pay, for Zane,"

She released me slowly and pressed her hand to my cheek. "No, sweetheart, just keep yourself alive,"

I nodded stiffly and with a final embrace watched Zane's parents turn back to Dumbledore to discuss future plans for the body and how to keep it a private matter. I wasn't sure how that would be even possible, already I could see reporters grouping together in clusters, trying to get a closer look. Bloody vultures.

"James?"

I turned to Lily slowly and raised an eyebrow.

"Can we go home now, please? I don't want to be here anymore,"

Despite the obvious traumatic situation Lily looked calm, composed, my little soldier.

I held my hand out and when she took it, I pulled her tight into my embrace and then with a pop we were back home.

"Home sweet home," I murmured, still holding Lily close.

Lily peeked out from my chest and looked around. "Thank god, I don't think I could have held on much longer there, it's like the air was just buzzing with despair, did you feel it? I just wanted to give everyone a big cuddle and make them a milo,"

I smiled down at her. "Milo?"

"Chocolate drink thing, it's delicious can be served hot or cold," she explained.

I nodded like I understood although I had no clue.

"What are we going to do?" Lily asked and it wasn't a rhetorical question out of despair, it was determined and genuinely curious.

"We call the order together, as much as we can, we need to start fighting back in this war,"

"Ok, give me two days,"

I look down at her and smile. "I'll give you four hours Evans,"

"Four hours?" she shrieks. "Are you insane, just how the hell am I meant to pull that off!"

I pecked her lightly on the lips. "Evans, women are the fastest networkers ever, I swear to god half the female population at Hogwarts knew when I sneezed a second before I even knew I was going to,"

Lily sighed. "You owe me big time,"

"I'm willing to pay you in sexual favours,"

Lily rolled her eyes and began to walk away. "Good to see impending gloom and war hasn't ruined your libido Potter,"

I smacked her arse as she left, just for good measure.

LILY

"What do you mean Zane is dead and James needs us to fight back?"

I smiled at Alice patiently. "Pretty much exactly what it sounds like, there's no hidden message I promise. Everyone else that was in our year and recruited into the order are already on their way, except for you and Frank, Sirius and Carla and Remus and Violet,"

Alice slid down into her seat and placed her head in her hands. "So Zane is dead? Zane Bluff?"

Sorrow and anger assaulted my senses again as I nodded. "Yeah, it's true. James and I arrived just after it happened, we tried to bring him back…it was no use,"

Frank threw something at the wall, I think it might have just been a cup or something. "He was a good guy, a genuinely great person, how could this have happened?"

"It's war now Frank," I replied.

"War huh? Well, it's not war if only one side is getting killed, that's a massacre,"

"Frank!" Alice squeaked, grabbing his arm.

"No, he's right," I said. "That's why we're going to start taking matters into our own hands,"

Frank yanked Alice up onto her feet. "Alright, we're wasting time just sitting here talking, we'll get Remus and Violet, you get Sirius and Carla, meet you back at your home ok?"

As they apparated I actually found myself smiling, as sick as it was at a time like this. He had called James's house my home, like it was now a place to call mine, a place I belonged.

I guess with James living there, that's true.

I was still smiling softly as I apparated to Sirius's loft, amazed by the strength that hope brings.

I stood in the living room and the house was quiet, way too quiet for Sirius's house and for my liking. In fact the whole thing felt off, the living room was tidy and felt unused, the kitchen had no mess, no dishes piling up and there was no tie on Sirius's door and his bed was neatly made.

Was it possible he never made it home? What the hell could have prevented Sirius from getting Carla home for private sexy time? Shit, I really didn't want to finish that thought.

I was just about to apparate home when I heard a squeal come from outside and before I knew it I was charging out there, wand raised and ready.

In the middle of the back yard was Carla, dressed in very little and giggling as she rode on top of an impossible big black, shaggy dog that was jumping around and zooming with alarming speed through the whole back yard.

What the hell? Where was Sirius?

Carla was now dumped on the ground and the big dog stood over her menacingly, prowling closer and closer. I should have known a dog that big couldn't be friendly, why the hell was I just standing here?

"Carla!" I screamed. "Run!"

I charged down the small hill that lead to the spacious back yard, wand raised, prepared to stab the dog to death with my little wooden wand if it meant Carla was saved.

Carla looked up at me lazily and smiled, actually smiled the idiot, as if there wasn't a massive dog ready to tear her throat out right in front of her.

Worst timing ever, I sneezed and prepared myself for the claws sinking into my soft flesh, but it never came, when I opened my eyes again, Sirius lay across Carla, topless smirking up at me.

"Sirius? Where's the big dog, I swear there was one right here!"

Sirius grinned and slowly his teeth grew and his face changed and then the massive black dog was standing in front of me, shaking with what I can only guess was laughter.

It all suddenly clicked for me, the fact that of course the big dog was Sirius, he was an animagus just like James. My cheeks started burning as I realised what an idiot I was.

"Your concern is really touching Evans," Sirius said, back to his normal self. "But do you really think I'd allow Carla to be half naked and without me?"

I sighed. "No, I guess not,"

"It's cool huh?" Carla asked, beaming at Sirius.

"Fascinating," I mumbled, still embarrassed.

"So, I take it you didn't come here for a threesome then?" Sirius asked as he helped Carla up and they began walking to the house.

"No, funnily enough that wasn't on my list of things to do," I replied dryly.

"Well what can I do you for then?"

I sighed. "James sent me, there was…something happened,"

"He get his period?" Sirius joked.

I bit back my acid response and took a deep breath. "No Sirius, something bad happened ok? Um…Zane Bluff was murdered on the train, right after you guys got off, James and I were there just after it happened it was…it was the most awful thing I've ever seen. James wants everyone to get together so we can…"

"Hit back?" Sirius asked, smile and good nature gone and replaced by darkness.

"Yes,"

"Then let's go, I have been waiting for this day for years, it's about time we started giving them some of their own medicine, we can start with my dear cousin,"

Without another word and without even stopping to get changed he grabbed Carla and was gone.

I allowed myself three deep breaths, calming myself down and pushing aside the tears that were fighting hard to break through, and then I followed them.

*

The house is in chaos when I arrive, there are about ten of our little group in the Order immersed in heated discussions with each other, the words just running together, becoming impossible to understand, but the tone is the same, excitement, impatience and frustration all buzzing together as one.

Only two people are isolated from the throng of people. Carla is curled into a ball on the couch with her hands over ears and James sits on the kitchen bench a little behind everyone, deep in thought, almost oblivious to his surroundings.

"You're talking about murder," Alice argues and Fabian looks at her like she's insane.

"We're talking about war Mrs Longbottom, protecting the world from evil so that people like us aren't murdered and people like you can bring your children up safely,"

"Alice is right, this may be war but I'm not comfortable with just talking about killing people, no matter how evil, like it's a sport or hobbie, we should put more thought into this," Violet added.

"And just wait until someone else gets murdered before we make a move? They killed a fellow Slytherine Violet, they don't have a soul and they aren't going to hesitate like we are right now," Sirius tells her.

"That's enough,"

His voice is quiet but it silences the whole room. As one we turn to James, who is tracing his finger over a tea towel that reads 'home is where the heart is,'

"Who wants to die?"

We all stare at him with wide eyes, no one finds a voice to answer.

"I know I don't, and I don't want to have to watch anyone else I care about die either. I didn't call you all here to argue, to just talk about making a stand or to force anyone into anything they aren't comfortable with. I called you here because I'm tired, I'm confused and I'm scared shitless,"

Gideon's mouth actually falls open.

"When I held Zane, cold and dead in my arms today, all I wanted to do was crawl into my parents arms and only crawl out once it was safe. Let me make something very clear to you right now, I never, ever want to feel that way again. I brought you all here today because we are all kids, relying on those bigger and better than us to make everything ok. That needs to stop. We are no longer children, we aren't allowed to be, we need to grow up and be the ones that make the world a better place. If you're scared, then that's good, you should be, you can use that fear and channel it into something good, if you're angry, even better, you're going to need that passion. Today an innocent life was taken away, but let me assure you he won't be the only one, and if we don't fight back then we're going to witness so many more pointless deaths. I'm not talking about murder, I'm talking about eliminating threats and fighting for those that can't fight for themselves. I need to know, right now, who's with me,"

I stepped forward at once and took James' hand in mine. "I'm there,"

Next the Prewett brothers stepped forward, followed by Frank, Alice, Remus and soon the only ones that hadn't stepped forward were Sirius, Carla, Violet and Peter.

"Pete?" James asked.

Peter, looking more miserable than ever slowly stepped forward.

"Babe?" Sirius asked, staring over at Carla who was still half dressed and curled on the couch.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. "I can't do it, please don't hate me,"

She apparated before anyone else could reply.

Sirius closed his eyes and remained motionless for a few seconds before he looked up and met James' eyes.

"I'm in mate, as if it was ever a question, brothers for life, what's the plan?"

"I need more time," Violet whispered, glancing slightly at Remus. "Is that ok?"

"Of course it is," I told her with a warm smile and she relaxed slightly.

"Do you have a plan, oh fearless leader?" Sirius asked with a grin.

James smiled wryly. "Yeah, as a matter of fact I do, let's just pray Evans pulls through,"

"Me?" I asked in surprise. "What do I have to do with it?"

"You're the key to whole operation my love, the most important player,"

I gulped down the fear that pressed against my throat. "What's my part?"

James stared at me with an intensity I rarely saw, He looked nervous, sad and a bit regretful.

"You're the bait,"