Thank you to everyone taking this journey with me and our beloved Castle characters. I hope you continue to enjoy the story.
Rain pounding on the tin roof of the cabin woke Rick the next morning. He wasn't sure what time it was—early, he knew, because through the sheets of rain falling outside, only the barest hint of light was coming through the windows—but he didn't particularly care, as it was a Saturday morning and Kate was sleeping peacefully and soundly in his arms. She hadn't awakened in the middle of the night at all. He had, a couple of times, when she had shifted in her sleep, but she was only doing normal shifting of position to get more comfortable.
His mind flashed ahead several months, to when Kate would be very pregnant, and find it impossible to get comfortable enough to sleep through the night. He was grateful Kate was catching up on her sleep now.
He brushed his lips tenderly across her forehead, and in the dim light of the rainy morning, he caught the hint of a smile on her face, before she settled more fully back into sleep, snuggling closer to him. She had become more tactile with him after the summer he spent missing, and they had both become more tactile with each other after being shot in May.
Rick knew he would never not be amazed that Kate Beckett loved him, married him, and was having a family with him.
He just lay there in bed with Kate asleep in his arms, her head resting in the crook of his neck, listening to the rain outside, and let the contentment and peace he was feeling wash over his whole being, like a giant tidal wave. He had Kate and their baby...Alexis...his mother...their friends and family...their home…
It took Rick a while to realize what the root of this feeling was: the fact that he wanted for absolutely nothing. He had everything he had ever wanted, everything he had ever dreamed of, and he could be nothing but grateful and overjoyed that this was the case.
Kate eventually stirred and awoke, giving Rick a sleepy smile before jolting to full wakefulness. She sat up and exclaimed, "Rick, I slept!"
"Very well," he agreed.
"No...I mean, yes, but Rick, I slept all night. I didn't have any nightmares!" Kate exclaimed. "I didn't wake up screaming or have a panic attack either!" She threw her arms around him, hugging him tightly. He hugged her back, smiling.
"Thank you," she whispered in his ear.
He drew back to look at her, slightly puzzled. "For what?" he asked.
Kate cupped his cheek in her hand. "I'm pretty sure the reason I didn't have any nightmares or wake up screaming last night was because you were here with me," she said. "I know that I'm brave, badass Beckett-"
"Excellent use of alliteration there," Rick murmured approvingly.
Kate gave him a look before continuing, "-but you've always had my back...except for the times I was too stubborn, too prideful, too scared to let you in...and I am so glad and so grateful that I get to do this," here she touched her still-flat belly, "and go through life with you by my side...that I don't have to be brave, badass Beckett all alone."
Rick couldn't come up with words to respond to that, so he kissed Kate soundly, tenderly, and then there were no words for several minutes. As they lay in each other's arms in the afterglow, Kate finally noticed the rain. Turning her head to look out the window, she frowned. "Well, so much for apple picking today," she reflected.
Rick kissed her bare shoulder. "We can find plenty of other things to do today," he said. "How's the morning sickness?"
"Nonexistent today, thankfully," Kate said. "I'm starving."
"Well, we can't have that," Rick replied. Throwing off the covers, he retrieved his boxers and t-shirt. After hastily dressing, he said, "I'll go get started on breakfast."
Kate raked a hand through her hair and smiled at him. "I'll be out in a few minutes," she promised. He smiled before heading for the kitchen to cook breakfast.
Kate grabbed the t-shirt and pajama pants she had slept in and carried them into the bathroom. Before putting them on, she looked at herself in the mirror over the sink; her eyes were bright, her face relaxed. She let her eyes drift down to her chest and torso, and the road map of fading scars crisscrossing her body. Those scars were no longer ugly to her, and not only because Rick thought they were beautiful and never hesitated, when she did start to feel self-conscious about them, to tell her so.
Those scars were badges of honor to Kate now. They were proof of her survival, proof of how hard she fought to stay with Rick, how hard she fought for him and them and her very life...a life that was now going to include motherhood. Alexis had been in her early teens when they met, and they had not always been on the best of terms, although they were growing increasingly closer with each passing week. Kate understood where Alexis was coming from; when she was in her early teens, she wouldn't have been happy if either of her parents had been working with someone who put their lives in danger every day. But that was one thing Alexis, and Sweetpea too, for that matter, wouldn't have to worry about anymore.
Kate pulled on the pajama pants, then let her hand drift, as it so often did, to rest over her and Rick's unborn child. "I'm still pretty new at the mom thing, if my experiences with your big sister even really count," Kate confessed to the baby. "And being a mom from the very beginning...I've never done that before. But your dad has. He raised Alexis all by himself, for all intents and purposes, and she turned out great, she really did. And you couldn't have a better dad. We both love you so much already.
"I can't promise that I'm not going to screw up sometimes, and given what your dad and I were both like when we were younger, you'll probably do things once in a while...hopefully not too often...that will require us to be strict with you, and to punish you." She gave a watery laugh. "Your Grandma Johanna would have a field day if she were here and you turn out to be the girl that I know deep down your dad really wants. Not that he'll love you any less if you're a boy," she added hastily. "I know he'll be crazy about you whether you're a boy or a girl. But he's already raised one girl, so if you're a boy, it'll be new territory for both of us.
"But that's what great about your dad and me. Well, everything about your dad and me is great, really. We're gonna be the embarrassing parents when you get older, just so you know. Not having PDAs in public...well, not most of the time," she amended, "but we're in this for life, and we're not shy about showing each other affection. Not inappropriately, at least not in front of other people, but..." She blew out a breath. "You can see why I'm warning you up front that I'm new to all of this."
Kate pulled her t-shirt on over her head and smoothed it down. "No matter how many mistakes I make, though, I can and I will promise you two things right now: that you are very much loved and very much wanted...and that no mother will do more or fight harder to make sure her child has the best and happiest life possible than I will do and fight for you...always."
"Kate? Breakfast is almost ready!" Rick called from the kitchen then.
"Be right there!" she called back. She pulled her hair into a quick bun, then smoothed her shirt down once more. "And thank you for not making me feel like I have to throw up today, because I'm pretty sure I smell pancakes out there."
Sure enough, Rick had whipped up a batch of pancakes, with maple syrup, butter, and whipped cream as available toppings, and a pot of regular coffee, though Kate limited herself to just one cup because of the caffeine.
The rain had picked up while they were eating breakfast. After they washed and dried the dishes together, Kate went to the front door of the cabin. She opened the screen door and then the front door, and was hit by a gust of rain-soaked wind. Hurriedly slamming the door shut, she said, "This is obviously in for the day."
"So we'll pick apples tomorrow," Rick said.
"Or we could do it the next time we come up here," Kate replied.
Rick's answering grin was brighter than the sun. "I have an idea," he said. Taking Kate's hand, he led her upstairs, and into the bathroom, where he proceeded to turn on the faucet to fill the bathtub.
"Sometimes I really love the way your mind works," Kate said.
"Only sometimes?" Rick asked, feigning a pout.
"A lot more often than I used to," Kate replied.
Rick retrieved the bath oil, and Kate's shampoo and conditioner, while Kate grabbed towels and washcloths.
It wasn't nearly as spacious as their tub at home, but Rick and Kate got into the tub together, and after washing their bodies, Rick washed Kate's hair, gently massaging her scalp at the same time. She hummed contentedly. "I think you're spoiling me," she said.
"Is that an objection?" Rick asked.
"Not at all," Kate replied as Rick rinsed the last of the conditioner out of her hair. She turned her head to look at him. "I have a feeling you're going to spoil me more the further into this pregnancy we get."
"Your instincts are spot on as usual," Rick said. He moved her wet hair aside and nuzzled the back of her neck before kissing it.
"So I should get used to it, is what you're saying," Kate said, and he could hear the smile in her voice.
"You know what's great about us?" Rick asked.
"Everything," Kate replied.
"Yeah," Rick said. She turned to face him again now. "And above all, we're a team. We have never teamed up on anything that hasn't turned out to be a great success. This will be the greatest adventure and the biggest success of our lives."
"It's going to be an adventure, all right," Kate agreed. "You've done this before. I'm really in uncharted territory here."
"You are going to be an extraordinary mother," Rick said. "I know it."
"I'll make mistakes," Kate said worriedly.
"Every parent makes mistakes," Rick said. "I did, my mother did, your parents did. We're only human. But it's all going to work out. And I promise, you won't have to be the bad cop all the time."
"You know, one of the things that made me realize you weren't the devil-may-care playboy you presented to the world was seeing you with Alexis," Kate admitted, "seeing the kind of dad you are to her. I can't wait to see you with our kid."
"That's another thing: you won't be up in the middle of the night alone," Rick vowed. "And you won't be the only one changing diapers or giving baths or walking the floor. I'm a very hands-on parent."
"So I gathered," Kate said. She leaned back against Rick, the back of her head resting against his chest.
"I can't wait to see you with our kid either," Rick said softly, right in Kate's ear. He knew she was smiling at that even before he saw her face when she turned to meet his kiss.
After their bath, and after Kate had blow-dried her hair, they wandered down to the basement, since Kate had mentioned wanting to look for some photo albums that she thought might be down there.
The basement was bigger than Rick had thought it would be. One whole wall was taken up by a workbench loaded with tools, which was obviously Jim's. Another wall was floor-to-ceiling wooden shelves that were loaded down with fishing equipment, picnic baskets, Mason jars, and several cardboard boxes and plastic storage totes. A large space heater sat unplugged in the middle of the floor, with a battered old recliner, end table, and lamp near the lone window.
Three long wooden posts were spaced several feet apart, stretching from floor to ceiling. While Kate was inspecting the shelves, looking for the photo albums, Rick noticed what he thought were some scratches on the middle of the three posts, and went to take a closer look.
Kate was rummaging through a storage tote that was half filled with cookbooks when she heard Rick say, "Kate? What's this?"
She turned and looked over her shoulder at him to find him standing in front of the middle of the three wooden posts in the basement. Pushing the storage tote back into its place, she wiped her dusty hands on the thighs of her jeans before crossing the room to join Rick.
When she saw what he was looking at, what he was asking about, she felt tears well in her eyes. "Oh my god," she whispered. "I had completely forgotten about this."
Kate reached out and traced the initials carved into the wooden post with her fingertips, wondering how she could have forgotten something as monumental as this had been, then answering herself in the next breath: because for so long, it hurt too much to remember.
"That's you," Rick said softly, reaching out to touch the letters KHB carved into the post with the tip of his index finger.
"Yes," Kate whispered. She swallowed hard, then cleared her throat. "I was...nine years old, I think, and I was really bored. It wasn't raining like it is now, but it had been raining, so it was too wet to go swimming or even go outside without sinking into a mud puddle up to your knees, really, and I didn't feel like helping my mom in the kitchen. I don't know what my dad was doing, but he wasn't down here. I wandered down here, and I found a jackknife mixed in with my dad's tools over there, so I carved my initials in this post." She ran the tip of her own index finger over her initials now.
"My mom caught me just as I was finishing the 'B,'" Kate continued. "I really thought she was going to blow her stack, or at least lecture me on defacing the cabin, and using the jackknife without an adult around. But all she did was ask if she could see the jackknife. I gave it to her, and the next thing I knew, she started carving her initials into the pole, right above mine." Kate touched the initials carved above hers, slightly off-center, so that the 'B' in the carved "JMB" lined up with the "H" in the "KHB" below it.
"So JMB is your mom," Rick said quietly.
Kate nodded once. "Johanna Marie Beckett," she said. "And just as Mom was finishing the B in her initials, Dad came downstairs and said he wondered where we had disappeared to, and then he noticed the jackknife in Mom's hand, and me standing there with a guilty expression on my face. So he looks and sees that we've carved our initials into the post, and he gives my mom this raised eyebrow look and asks if this was her idea or mine. She told him it was my idea, but she went along with it because it was a good one.
"As I realized I wasn't about to get grounded for the rest of my life, Dad said, 'Well, it looks like it's my turn, then,' and Mom handed him the jackknife, and he carved his initials above hers." Now she touched the JRB above Johanna's initials. "James Reece Beckett."
Before Rick could respond to that, Kate hurried across the basement to her father's workbench and began rifling through all the tools on the pegboard, on the workbench itself, and in the storage drawers next to the workbench before finally finding what she was looking for. She returned to Rick's side and carefully held a jackknife out to him. "I'm not sure how sharp it is," she said, "but now it's your turn."
The light in her eyes was so radiant, the smile on her face so dazzling, that Rick opened the jackknife and carefully carved his initials—REC—below Kate's, staggering them as Jim and Johanna had done with theirs, so the E in his initials was under the B in Kate's initials.
Kate traced her fingertips across Rick's initials as he carefully closed the jackknife. "Perfect," she breathed. "Absolutely perfect." She looked at the pole. "And there's room for our kids to add their initials someday."
Rick smiled. "I think I just participated in my first Beckett family tradition," he said.
Kate laughed happily. "You did," she said. "You really did." She put an arm around his waist, and he wrapped his arm around her waist. "Maybe there'll be more Beckett family traditions you can participate in."
"I'd like that," Rick said, brushing a kiss to the crown of Kate's head.
"Me too," Kate replied honestly.
The rain didn't let up for the rest of the weekend, so they lazed around the cabin, napping, eating, making love, and finalizing their plans for their big Christmas Eve baby announcement to all their family and friends before heading back home to the city on Sunday afternoon.
Alexis and Javier were in their seats in the theater, waiting for the matinee of Steel Magnolias to start. They had already had a wonderful time on the drive up, talking and laughing and flirting and stopping off for lunch at a diner on the Interstate.
"Thank you so much for getting these tickets," Alexis said. "I'm really happy to be here with you."
Javier beamed at Alexis, threaded his fingers through hers, and said, "I'm really happy to be anywhere with you."
Alexis smiled back at him, and her expression softened before she leaned in to kiss him. He returned the kiss, mindful that they were in a public theater in Pennsylvania, so they didn't let themselves get too carried away with the kiss, but neither did they completely hold back.
Alexis rested her forehead against Javier's for a moment, then gently pulled back. But Javier was startled when Alexis stiffened, having caught sight of someone or something out in her peripheral vision, and then she slowly turned her head to look directly at whoever or whatever it was, before turning pale, slumping in her seat, and going, "Oh, no."
"What's wrong?" Javier asked urgently.
"She saw us!" Alexis exclaimed in a stage whisper.
"You said Beckett and your dad weren't gonna be here this afternoon," he reminded her.
"It's not Kate," Alexis said glumly. "It could turn out to be worse."
All of this happened in a matter of a few seconds. The thought that Martha, Jenny, and Lanie all already knew about him and Alexis dating had Javier puzzled; if it wasn't Kate that had Alexis so upset, then who could it possibly be?
Before Javier could turn his head to follow her gaze, though, he heard a familiar voice saying, by way of greeting, "Well, Miss Castle, Detective Esposito, this is a surprise."
Javier looked up to find Victoria Gates, her husband at her side, standing in the row behind Alexis and himself, looking at them with undisguised curiosity and tempered surprise.
Aw, hell, Javier thought. No wonder Alexis was so upset. Gates! Javier remembered how he and Kevin, and Beckett and Castle, had kept their mouths shut for months when Beckett and Castle finally got together so that Gates wouldn't throw Castle out of the 12th Precinct.
Of course, it turned out she had known about them all along.
And Alexis didn't work with him.
But she was Castle and Beckett's daughter—Castle's by birth, Beckett's by choice. And they had no idea yet. They knew Alexis was dating someone, but not that it was him, Javier Esposito.
And Javier really didn't want that particular piece of news being relayed to them by Victoria Gates.
Javier surreptitiously squeezed Alexis's hand in what he hoped she would take as a reassuring manner. "Yes, it is, sir," he agreed.
The fact that Esposito was holding hands with Alexis Castle now, and had just squeezed her hand in what was clearly a gesture of reassurance, coupled with the fact that she had seen them kissing just a moment ago, crystallized the situation for Victoria Gates: they were clearly a couple. And every instinct she possessed told her that Kate and Castle had no clue about their relationship yet.
Alexis knew it would be childish and immature to plead with Gates not to inform her dad and Kate about her and Javier, so she fought back her initial panic and said, "It's nice to see you again, sir, Mr. Gates."
"It's nice to see you too, Miss Castle, Detective Esposito," Victoria said. I could certainly have some fun with this, Victoria thought as she and Gerald took their seats...directly behind Alexis and Javier.
The show began, and all conversation ceased. Javier did not let go of Alexis's hand, partly because he wanted to hold her hand, and partly as a reassurance to her that no matter what might happen with Gates, they would handle it together.
At the intermission, Alexis excused herself to the ladies' room the instant the lights came up. "I should powder my nose too," Victoria said as Alexis hurried up the aisle. "Excuse me."
"Sir, wait," Javier said.
"Detective?" Gates asked, giving him a look she used to reserve solely for Castle.
Undaunted, Javier forged ahead. "Can't you see Alexis is rattled by your presence, sir? She needs a few minutes to regroup."
"What, exactly, does Miss Castle think I'm going to do?" Victoria challenged.
"She doesn't have any idea what you'll do, sir. That's the problem," Javier replied.
"And you? What do you think I'm going to do?" she asked.
"Yes, Alexis and I are dating," he admitted. "And no, Castle and Beckett don't know about it...yet." He emphasized the "yet."
"I deduced that within a minute of seeing the two of you here," Victoria replied.
"It's serious, all right? This is the real thing," Javier said, struggling to keep a tight rein on his temper and remember exactly to whom he was speaking. "We're going to tell Castle and Beckett, but it has to come from us, sir. We don't know exactly when we're going to tell them, but we are going to tell them. Us. Together. So I'm asking you, with all due respect, not to say a word to Castle or Beckett about what you saw here today."
"I had no idea your memory was so short, Detective Esposito," Victoria said wryly. At his puzzled look, she said, "Plausible deniability. I practiced it with Kate and Castle, and I have every intention of practicing it with you and Alexis. Unless, of course, one of you winds up standing on a bomb and the other refuses to leave them alone. Then I'd have to say something, as I did when that happened to Kate and Castle."
Javier realized that Gates was messing with him, and that she would not tell Beckett and Castle about him and Alexis. "Thank you, sir," he said, not even trying to hide his surprise and relief.
"Don't thank me," Victoria said seriously, sternly. "Just do right by her."
"I will," Javier promised.
Victoria gave a short nod, then did excuse herself to the ladies' room. Alexis was lingering by the sinks, her discomfort now gone, the look on her face one of steely resolve and determination that distinctly reminded Victoria of Kate Beckett.
Before Victoria could say a word, Alexis spoke. "Deputy Chief Gates, it's true that Javier and I are dating. But it's also true that this is serious. It took us by surprise, but our feelings for each other are very real. This isn't some fling, this isn't some rebellion, or some experiment. And no, my dad and Kate don't know about it yet. But we're going to tell them. We just wanted to be absolutely sure before we told them. So I am respectfully asking you not to tell them what you saw here today. It has to come from Javier and me."
And Victoria surprised Alexis then by saying, "I completely agree. You and Detective Esposito have to be the ones to tell Castle and Kate about your relationship. And because of your father and Kate, I am an expert on plausible deniability. I practiced it with them, and I will practice it with you and Detective Esposito."
"Thank you, sir," Alexis said, hoping she didn't sound too relieved.
"You're welcome, Alexis," Victoria replied. "And for what it's worth, which I have a feeling is a lot, I was delayed in coming in here because your boyfriend made his own appeal to me not to say anything to Castle and Kate, and let me know how serious he is about you."
Alexis smiled, looking so like her father smiling at or because of Kate in that instant that it nearly took Victoria's breath away. "He would," she said. "Thank you again, sir. Excuse me. I'm going to return to my seat now."
When Alexis returned to her seat, even knowing that Gates' husband was sitting behind them, intently focused on his program, she leaned over and kissed Javier on the cheek. "I talked to Deputy Chief Gates," she said.
"So did I," he replied.
"She told me," Alexis said. "She also told me what you said. Well, the Cliff's Notes version. How serious you are about me."
"I've never been more serious about anyone in my life," he said so only she could hear. "You make me feel things I didn't know I could feel, Alexis."
"You make me feel things I didn't know I could feel, Javier," Alexis replied. "It's kind of scary. But good scary. The best possible scary."
"Yeah," Javier agreed. He kissed her hand as the lights flashed on and off, signaling that the second act was about to begin.
Victoria returned to her seat and saw them, Javier and Alexis, sitting together, holding hands still. And when M'Lynn had her breakdown over Shelby's death, and Alexis cried, just as she had on Opening Night (Kate had cried then too, but she and Rick were the only ones who knew that her tears were more pregnancy hormone-induced than anything else), Javier produced a fresh handkerchief from his pocket and gently wiped away her tears.
Victoria noticed the gesture even as she was fighting her own tears at the scene onstage, and it was in that moment that she knew Alexis and Javier were destined to follow in Castle and Kate's footsteps.