~36~

Kendall blinked open his eyes, finding himself staring up at the ceiling. His eyes burned and his body ached as everything suddenly came slamming back into his head; the dance, the Palm Woods ghost, his mom acting weird, Sydney's nightmare. Gustavo was finally out of the Palm Woods, which he was happy about, but he had an odd feeling of…dread? Worry? Doubt? Guilt? He couldn't pin point it, he just felt weird and exhausted. Enough so that when the apartment was finally empty and quiet he took the time to take a nap instead of joining in whatever insanity Carlos was bound to cook up in his boredom.

But, the nap didn't help. It made his feeling of uneasiness that much stronger. Every time he closed his eyes, he could see the disapproving look on his father's face, and it still made him second guess everything he did. Should he really be taking a nap right now? What could he do to be productive? And then he got angry at himself, his dad wasn't even around and he could still dictate aspects of his life, like he didn't….

"Have a choice," Kendall whispered, sitting up, blinking, staring off into space. "I didn't have a choice."

The realization hit him so hard, he was surprised he didn't involuntarily flinch or fall off the bed. He loved hockey and he loved playing but he didn't have a choice in how long or when he practiced. That was all his dad. And when things didn't go the way he wanted…Kendall reached a hand up and touched the burn on the back of his neck before carefully smoothing his hair over it.

He climbed off his bed and made his way over to his guitar case, gently grabbing it and laying it on the floor. He unzipped the bag and moved his guitar aside to grasp the folder that sat behind it. He flipped it open and pulled out a thick stack of paper clipped papers; songs he had written when he was younger. He flipped part way through until stopping at a folded and torn piece of loose leaf paper stuck into the pile.

It was barely legible; he could make out some words like "empty", "monster", "bottom", and "out of control" and he instantly flashbacked to where he was when the song was written. It wasn't long after he had picked up the guitar and was learning how to play; he was just jotting down ideas of what to write and the idea of his dad came into his head. He wondered how he would feel if he learned that he was learning to play the guitar and it all just came out in harsh scrawls.

"You better not mess this up, kid. So help me, God, you better not mess this up."

Kendall squeezed his eyes shut, scrunching the papers in his hands.

"But, you keep messing things up and I can't keep bailing you out. You're an embarrassment. A disappointment. You can't to do anything right. Now get out of my face before I get really angry."

Kendall squeezed as tight as he could, feeling his finger tips starting to hurt. He clenched his teeth, his jaw acing before slowly letting the air out of his nose, relaxing his tight grip on the papers in his hands, looking down at it.

"No, I mean, why do you want to sing?" Riley asked, sliding her phone back into her pocket. "What do you like about it?"

"Its fun," Kendall finally replied after a shrug. "I just want to have fun with my friends." Kendall saw a look of surprise quickly cross her face before it was masked with an unreadable expression. "Why do you sing?"

Riley peered at him for a moment, staying silent. When Kendall wasn't sure whether or not she was going to answer she finally said, "I don't really know anymore."

Kendall's jaw dropped and he slowly lowered himself until he was sitting on the ground.

"What happened to you?" James asked, doing a double take when he saw the bruise on her shoulder. Kendall, Carlos, and Logan winced when they saw the bruise on her face. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," Rhuben dismissed with a wave of her hand. "I just fell."

"You sure?" Logan asked.

"You're all hockey players right?" Rhuben snapped her eyes flashing. "it's not like you haven't gotten hurt like this in a game before. I just fell. Don't worry."

"No," he whispered, shaking his head back and forth. "Oh, no, no, no, no."

He shook his head faster and faster before putting the songs back into his folder, shoving it back into his guitar case, and putting his guitar and guitar case back. His head was spinning. It can't be true. It can't. He had to be sure. He crawled over to his bed and reached for the various boxes underneath, becoming mor and more frustrated until he found a box of CD cases. He held it in his lap, dragging his finger down the sides as he silently read the titles. Come on, where is it?

He set the box aside and got to his feet, striding out of his room. He heard the sound of music playing and following it to Katie's room. "DarkElements CDs, do you have any?" he asked, walking over to the stereo, switching it off.

Katie looked up from her computer, raising her eyebrows before facing her computer screen again. "I'm gonna have to call you back, Lizz," she said before dragging her forefinger across the touchpad of her computer before tapping it a few times. She then set her computer aside, pulling her headphones from her ears. "Knocking, ever heard of it?"

"Do you have the CDs or not?" Kendall asked. He didn't care about manners, he didn't care about whether or not he was interrupting a conversation she was having. It didn't seem important. Nothing was as important as this. If it was even true. He had to find out.

"Why don't you try asking nicely?" Katie asked, sitting up straighter, clasping her hands in her lap, smiling sweetly. "I don't remember hearing a 'please' in there."

"Katie!" Kendall said, reaching a hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose. "The CDs. Just…do you have them or not?"

Katie's eyebrows knitted together slightly. "I don't know, probably," she replied with a shrug. "Why do you need it so bad? What's up?"

Kendall hesitated for a moment. Katie now knew about their dad, but she didn't know any details and he didn't know if he really wanted to tell her about absolutely everything. He saw how it affected her once; hell, he didn't know if she really believed what he or their mom had said to her. They hadn't brought it up since. He saw that she was pretty down since the news and he had noticed that he hadn't been paying too much attention to her lately so he invited her to the Palm Woods dance with him.

Jo was pretty annoyed that he didn't invite her up until she found out the reason why. She was still kind of upset because it took him so long to tell her, but they had made up for it. But, things were still kind of…odd between them. She had noticed that he had been kind of distant and not all there. Everything would be sorted if he would just tell her everything, but these were things he hadn't even talked to his friends about and they had heard everything, or rather he assumed they did…he was yelling at his mom and everything at the time.

"I just…I want to check something," Kendall finally replied. "So, do you have them?" Katie continued to stare at her. "What?"

"Why are you so snappy lately?" Katie asked, a frown coming to her face, tilting her head to the side. "Seriously, Kendall? What's wrong?"

"Just…been thinking," Kendall replied. He raked his fingers through his hair. "About dad." Katie dropped her gaze to her lap. "And why he wants to see us so bad." He let out a short laugh through his nose, shaking his head. Can't be anything good, that's for sure. It's not like he didn't know where we've been. Why does he want to talk so badly now? He watched as Katie twisted her fingers in her lap.

"Maybe…he…wants to come back?" Katie said as more of a question.

Kendall cut his eyes in her direction, staring at her before he laughed a little bit. "Yeah, right," he replied, shaking his head. "That's not it. I know that's not it."

"Why not?" Katie asked.

Kendall had to stop himself from laughing in her face. "If he wanted to come back so badly he would've done so by now," Kendall replied, using his thumbnail to scratch at his eyebrow. "Trust me, he's heard about everything with Gustavo by now if mom hasn't told him. I still can't believe she was talking to him."

"Do you…not want dad back…at all?" Katie asked.

Kendall pressed his lips together. Once upon a time he did want that to happen. He wanted everything to just be a bad dream and to have his dad walk through the doors and back into his life. But, he knew that just wasn't the case. He knew not to get his hopes up about anything in that regard. He'd been gone for 9, almost 10 years now, what made it that he suddenly wanted to get in contact with them?

"I don't think it's a good idea," Kendall slowly replied. He watched as Katie open and closed her mouth. He could guess what she was going to say and he was trying to keep his anger in check, but as the silence wore on, it just bubbled up more and more.

"Kendall…it's been a long time," Katie said quietly. "He might…want to apologize-"

Kendall let out a loud bark of laughter and Katie instantly shut up. "This is just what dad is trying to do," he said with a shake of his head. "What he's always done. He…he tries to be all Mr. Nice Guy and make you trust him and then…urgh!"

He had seen it too many times. He had been through it too many damn times. If he was mad at his mom or him or Katie or work he was always the one his dad took it out on. He didn't know if he had done something when he was younger or what, but one minute, his dad would be incredibly sweet and loving, and someone he really loved to hang out with, and the next…

"Kendall-"

"No!" Kendall saw Katie jump and he pressed his lips together breathing in and out of his nose, trying to get himself to calm down. Just breathe, Kendall. Relax. He's not here. No decisions have been made; just breathe. "No way. It's bad. I know it's bad. He-he…I just know it."

He tried to breathe as normally as possible but he felt strange. His head was pounding. He couldn't stand still. He was starting to sweat. He grasped the front of his shirt and rapidly pulled it away from his chest, trying to cool himself down. His mouth was dry. He shifted his weight from foot to foot. He reached a hand up to touch his burn before tightly grasping a fistful of hair on the back of his head.

"Ugh, you're so naïve, Katie," Kendall said with a shake of his head, dropping his arm with a loud smack. "Grow up and deal! Dad's a jerk who's not coming back."

"Oh, yeah?" Katie asked weakly, her voice cracking. Kendall raised his eyebrows. "Well then…if that's true…why didn't he…hurt me?"

Kendall looked into her eyes and saw sadness, hurt, and vulnerability and he instantly let his anger and annoyance go. She and his mom were the only ones who could really do that to him. He hated being mad at them; they had helped him out over the years and shaped him to be the man he was today in more ways than one. Despite how terribly he had treated Katie, without noticing, she always looked up to him and he didn't want to be the one to hurt her.

"…Because I stopped him," Kendall replied, drumming his fingers on the doorframe. How did we even get into this conversation? The last thing he wanted to do was this; an argument and with his sister no less. He ran a hand over his face. "Look, do you have those CDs or not?" His voice cracked as he asked the question.

"Well," Katie said, with a sigh, keeping her gaze away from him; not that he blamed her. "I might. Their signed CDs have flown off the shelves, almost as fast as your guys' hair. I'm surprised people want to buy that."

Kendall blinked before doing a double take before narrowing his eyes slightly. "When did you get our hair?" he asked slowly, as if afraid to hear the answer. Katie whistled to herself as she swung her legs over the side of her bed, getting to her feet. Kendall reached his hands up and started to check his hair, his eyes popping open when he found a chunk of hair at the back of his head, missing. "Katie!"

"Don't tell James," Katie said as she made her way over to her dresser, puling open a drawer. "With all of his hair….I'm surprised he hasn't found out by now."

Kendall rolled his eyes, shaking his head. He didn't know when Katie had gotten really obsessed with money, but he had to admit that she seemed to know what she was doing. It made him wonder if that was her way of helping his mom out; while he went to get a job at the local grocery store back home, she was trying to find a way to bring in money of her own. Or to get some attention. The attention that he didn't give her…

Kendall let out a sigh as he watched Katie move through some of her things as she continued to look for the CDs. "Katie?" he asked quietly.

"Hmmm?" Katie asked before letting out a small 'aha' when she found them, pulling out a small stack of CD cases (he briefly wondered why she was hiding them in her dresser drawer), holding it out to him. Kendall walked towards her and took the CD from her before stepping closer to her, pulling her to his chest into a hug. "What are you doing?"

"Giving you a hug, doofus," Kendall replied before stepping away from her, moving his hands to rest on her shoulders. "Dad's really missed the chance to see you grow up. I feel sorry for him." Katie twisted her mouth to the side and slowly blinked. "I really am sorry for how I've been treating you lately, baby sister. I honestly hadn't noticed…."

"Didn't really expect you to," Katie commented, twisting her mouth to the side and Kendall briefly closed his eyes. "Because you've been working so hard on your music and everything." She crossed her arms over her chest, pressing her lips together, showing disinterest and Kendall couldn't help but grin. She was returning back to her normal self. "I am proud of you, you know. Your music is great and everything…really."

"And?" Kendall pressed, quirking an eyebrow.

"And the more famous you get the more money I can get off ya," Katie said with a grin, sticking her tongue out between her teeth. She then lifted her hand and punched Kendall on the shoulder. "Thanks for always watching out for me…and stuff…whatever." She rocked back and forth on her feet, looking uncomfortable. Kendall knew that they were ok now, but he could still feel the little bit of tension between the two of them even as she looked up at him with adoration in her eyes. "I love you, Big Bro."

"Love you, too, Baby Sis," Kendall replied with a warm smile. He then hit the CD in his hand against his free palm before glancing at the front, spotting the signatures of Patrick, Noah, and Sydney on it. "So, thanks."

"What do you need it for anyway?" Katie asked, using her hip to push her dresser drawer closed.

"Just want some new music to listen to," Kendall replied with a shrug. He tilted his head to the side. "You sure you're ok?"

"Yeah," Katie replied with a nod. She rubbed at an arm with one of her hands before shrugging, her eyebrows shooting up. "I've been fine. I'll always will be fine. I have you and mom…and James, Logan, and Carlos. That's all I need."

Kendall opened and then closed his mouth. "Right," he replied with a nod. "Well, I've got to get going or I'll be late for rehearsal…again."

"So, what happened last night?" Katie asked and Kendall gave her a confused look. "I heard everybody up pretty late."

"Oh, Sydney had a nightmare, that's all," Kendall replied with a shrug. He tried to pass it off as being normal, but something was telling him that there was more to it. He was almost positive that he would find…something when looking after the small boy. Just say it, Kendall. You thought he was going to be covered in bruises or something. You've seen it before; so many times.

Kendall curled up onto his bed, grasping his computer as he started to rip the CDs to his computer. He flipped the CDs over, reading song titles to himself. "…To Be Loved, Pieces, Fat Lip, Burn, Welcome To My Life, Scars," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, shaking his head back and forth. If the song titles were any indication of what was going on, he didn't need anymore proof. How could I have not noticed? How could anyone not notice? All those people buying these CDs…all the times I've listened to them and not realized.

He felt sick to his stomach, and yet he didn't actually have any proof. It was just…scary to think that someone else has been or had been going through the same things he had, but on a grander scale. In this business, there was more at stake and with how…intense and stressed out Robert was all the time…it just made so much sense.

Kendall slapped the spacebar with his thumb, stopping the song from playing. He slowly removed the ear buds from his ears, staring at his computer. He didn't think he needed to hear the rest of the songs.

Kendall bobbed on the balls of his feet as he waited for the crosswalk light to show the little stick figure allowing him to cross. He gazed left and right out of the corner of his eyes. Did that woman have kids to go home to? Did that man? Did they know how to keep their anger in check? Did they put a hand on their kids? He couldn't help but look at people differently now; with more of a scrutinized eye.

He slid his hands into his jeans pockets, and followed the surge of people walking across the street. A few people hurried past him at a light jog, others merely glanced at him ou of the corner of their eyes as they easily strode past. But, he took his time. He wasn't in a big hurry to get to Rocque Records and to be yelled at.

His checkered Vans slapped against the ground as he stepped up onto the sidewalk on the other side of the street. He kicked at a giant rock before side stepping a wad of fresh looking gum that sat on the ground, moving himself into the path of a man coming out of a Jamba Juice.

"Oh, excuse me, sir," Kendall said, backing up a few steps, pulling his ear bud out of his ear to look up at the man. He then stopped moving, feeling his breathe slide past his partially parted lips. He blinked once, twice, three times as the man peered at him."Dad?" The man raised his eyebrows, crossing his arms over his chest. A small smile came to his face.

Kendall suddenly felt cold, as if someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over his head. He could feel the wave of coldness slide down his body, causing him to shiver. He let out a shaky breath of air and took a slow step back. He just needed to get out of there. He needed to run!

Kendall stumbled, nearly falling over as he struggled to leave as quickly as possible. He spouted out apologies as he dodged around some people, keeping his eyes on the man in front of him, who seemed to be watching him, cocking his head to the side in curiosity.

"Kendall?" Kendall jumped, whirling around to face Noah who stood behind him, peering curiously at him with his wide, blue eyes. "Sorry," he said in his quiet voice, smiling, "I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's ok," Kendall replied, giving Noah a small smile.

Noah tilted his head back slightly glancing at a spot over Kendall's shoulder. 'Wonder what dad's doing here," he commented and Kendall turned to see Robert coming out of Jamba Juice, looking down at the phone in his hands. Kendall looked around, his eyes darting from person to person, store to store. The man was gone."Thought he was in a meeting. Or at least, that's what he said."

Kendall didn't answer, but turned around to look at the teenaged boy. Noah stared back at him, his eyes holding question, his face passive. Kendall briefly, and as discreetly as possible, looked the boy up and down trying to spot a bruise or a scratch, anything. Noah's eyebrows slowly came together when neither of them spoke after a moment.

"Uhhh, what are you doing here?" Kendall asked. Noah lifted his arm and Kendall saw the white bag hanging off his arm. "Doughnuts."

"Mhm," Noah replied with a nod and then looked around them for a moment before looking back at Kendall. "Listening to our music, yeah?" Kendall blinked in surprise and then realized that his music was up really loudly.

"I must've been yelling," Kendall said, grinning sheepishly and Noah shrugged. "So…uh, you're on your way to Rocque Records?"

Noah nodded. "Meeting with Ronan and Gustavo to start working on tour; getting ideas for stage, song lists, stuff like that," he explained and Kendall felt himself getting excited. "You thought what you did was hard work, but this is even harder. Had to learn choreography for six new songs in two weeks for a tour once." What?! Kendall felt his eyes pop open in shock and Noah gave a one-shouldered shrug. But, did they want to do that or were they forced to? Kendall pressed his lips together. "So, which song do you like?"

"Uh," Kendall trailed off before falling into step beside the younger boy as Noah moved around him to head down the street. "They're all great. Really catchy." Noah's face didn't move at all to show any thanks. He seemed to wait until Kendall actually gave him a song choice. "Pieces."

"Off Enigma?" Noah asked, his eyebrows shooting up and Kendall slowly nodded. "So you've got imports. Interesting." And then silence fell between the two of them. Noah lifted his free hand and scratched at his neck. Pink lines briefly appeared on his skin from where he scratched until they faded. But, he noticed a very light pink scar running horizontally across Noah's neck. "Accident."

Of course it was, Kendall thought with a nod, but didn't say anything to the younger boy. Silence fell between the two of them as they continued their way to Rocque Records. But, now Kendall was torn between thinking about what he had just uncovered and about tour. Most importantly, he realized that this was the most he had ever heard Noah say to him.

As he stepped through Rocque Records, following Noah through the halls, he could feel the excitement in the building, energizing him. He could practically sense James and Carlos bouncing off the walls at the news; James because of all the girls he'd be able to meet and Carlos because…well, because he was Carlos.

"Doughnuts," Noah announced as he stepped into the room. He barely got the word out before Carlos shouted "DOUGHNUTS" and rushed over to him so quickly, that Noah's eyes widened and he flinched terribly. Kendall frowned and Noah glanced into the corner of the room before turning to address Ronan wassitting in the corner of the room. "What's the air conditioning setting in here? I'm freezing."

Nice save, Kendall thought to himself, watching as Noah dodged James, Carlos, and Patrick's grabby hands to put the bag of doughnuts down onto the table. "You know Ronan," Rhuben spoke up from where she was sitting on the floor. She, Riley, and Logan were playing with a deck of cards; Riley had a laptop on her lap. "He prefers his rooms to be cold. Like his heart."

"You ban pets for less than a month and you're branded for life," Ronan commented with a shake of his head. He then clapped his hands together. "Gustavo's running late from a meeting from Griffin figuring out a budget. But, now that we're all here, we can get started. We're not going to do anything too stressful today, just start to get an idea on how you want touring to go."

He motioned towards the Jacksons as Kendall moved to sit down on the couch. Sydney grabbed a doughnut and moved to sit down next to him, smiling up at him as he took a large bite of his doughnut. Kendall smiled back at him before turning his attention to Ronan.

"What do we have to do?" he asked, "And is this anything that my mom needs to know about?"

"Riles is taking down notes," Ronan replied, nodding his head towards the teenaged girl in front of her. "Gustavo and I were talking this over and we would like you guys to start coming up with stage ideas and set lists. Keep in mind set lists aren't final as we are also finalizing the songs that will be put on your debut album."

"And we can do…anything for our stage design?" Carlos asked, looking up from the box of doughnuts, three of them already in his hands. "Like…anything? Trampolines? Ramps? Moving sidewalks?"

"We used moving sidewalks once," Patrick commented. "Busted out my two front teeth trying to do a back walkover."

"He was too embarrassed to open his mouth," Riley said, giving his brother a teasing smile. "Quietest I've ever heard him in his entire life." Patrick's upper lip curled, but he didn't say anything.

Kendall watched the exchange with interest. Did he really knock out his two teeth during a performance? Or was it someone else? He looked at each of the Jacksons in turn. They looked like normal, average kids. It was weird to think something dark was going on.

"Yes, Carlos, you could have anything you want, within the budget," Ronan said to the teen who gave a cheer of excitement. "I'd just like you all to come up with some ideas. Keep in mind that for this tour, the stage needs to not only accommodate both bands but we're also looking to get Dak Zevon to open as well, to bring more people out to shows."

"Wardrobe you don't have to worry too much about as Riles will be handling that for you. We're in the works of buying a whole range of things that she'll be able to mix and match for you to perform in." Riley lazily lifted a hand into the air. "As you know, Rhuben's been doing choreography for you and she will continue to choreograph new routines for you for this new album. Just take into consideration that this all fits together; how you enter the stage, how you exit, and how tight or loose the clothes will be to do the choreography that Rhubes wants. So, I'd like this done as soon as you could possibly get it. I need to start sending this out to Margo-"

Patrick let out a gasp. "Is Margo being the production manager again?" he asked and Ronan slowly nodded, an amused look on his face. Patrick punched his fists into the air.

"Yeah, Margo!" Sydney cheered around a mouthful of doughnut. Noah sighed through his nose, handing Sydney a napkin so he could wipe his mouth. "Margo's great; she can get anything we want."

"Within reason," Riley pointed out.

"So…if we wanted like a mosh pit full of girls?" James asked, letting the question hang in the air. Kendall rolled his eyes, shaking his head.

Ronan chuckled. "Now, this will be a different performance than people are used to," he said, the seriousness returning to his voice. "Dak is a solo artist, well he's now doing some songs and could start to be considered a solo artist after Varsity Vampires, so he'll be doing a lot of acoustic stuff, and then Big Time Rush will go on as a pure pop boy band group, and then it'll go to the DarkElements who will jam on their instruments, and then move into the music group portion of their performance. It's going to be a lot of hard work, but I know you all can do it."

Kendall blinked, raising his eyebrows. The words of encouragement were so different than Gustavo's constant yelling at the four of them. He was becoming more and more excited about the idea of tour. He didn't know how much actually goes into a tour but he couldn't help but smile at the idea of this all becoming a reality. He never wouldn't thought things would come this far when he defended James at his audition.

"Now, things will be tricky part way through the tour as the Jacksons are flying back to Australia to work on their careers the last couple weeks of touring, which is why we have Dak coming on tour with us as well. Once this happens, he will be opening for you guys, so you'll essentially be headlining for the second half of the tour."

"Wait," Logan spoke up, looking confused. "You're going back to Australia?"

"Without us?" James asked. "I men, with all the hot girls over there I think it's only fair that we get to go with you." He then flashed Riley and Rhuben a charming smile. "Of course, I doubt any of those lovely ladies are hotter than you, two."

"Thanks, James," the girls chorused, rolling their eyes. Kendall's eyes narrowed slightly. They seemed to be annoyed with James's flirting, but pleased at the same time. He didn't know if he was seeing things, but he thought for sure that he saw a light flush on Riley's cheeks.

"Anytime," James replied with a warm smile.

"But, dudes, seriously?" Carlos asked, looking offended. "You're leaving us high and dry?" he then gave a pout, sticking out his bottom lip as far as it could go. "And I thought we were friends." Kendall sat up straight, wondering how they were going to answer.

"Don't get your knickers in a knot," Riley said with a shake of her head, rolling her eyes."We do this every six months, we head back home to work. No big deal." She then shot Carlos and annoyed look. "And we're not hanging you high and dry or whatever other stupid saying you want to throw our way."

"Riles," Ronan said in a warning tone, nodding towards her computer. She pressed her lips together, her expression softening before starting to type rapidly on the computer. "Anyway, once we have the stage and everything set up, we can start production on the technical and performance side of things. Gustavo and I are looking to rent the Lakeland Center in Orlando, Florida as our rehearsal space. It's big enough to build the stage you want and to really get the feel of everything. Essentially, you'll be spending the next couple of months rehearsing here, the last two weeks before tour starts in Florida-"

"Hell week," Patrick groaned and Noah nodded in agreement.

"-and then you have your opening show in New York," Ronan continued as if he wasn't interrupted. "Like I said, it's a lot of tough work, but I know you all can do it. You have Dak and your other friends to help you out. Just like Gustavo, Kelly, and I will be helping your mom, Kendall, with all her responsibilities while on tour." Ronan clapped his hands together. "Ok, then. I'm going to go see if I can save Gustavo from Griffin and you all, I think should go with Riles to get wardrobe worked on."

"Rhu, were you able to find the black fabric I was looking for?" Riley asked as she finished working on the word document before setting her computer aside.

"No," Rhuben simply replied and Riley gave her a look.

"How hard is it to find black fabric?" Riley asked as they all got to their feet. "I mean, it's a color you wear everyday."

"You'll be seeing black if you don't shut up," Rhuben grumbled, making her way out of the room with everyone else following, laughing and talking excitedly.

"You ok?" Ronan asked, turning towards Kendall.

"Yeah, it's just….a lot of information," Kendall replied, looking up at him. He got to his feet. "I'll join everyone else soon, I just have to use the bathroom first."

"Ok, just close the door behind you, it locks automatically but Riles has an extra key," Ronan replied, making his way out of the room after giving Kendall a smile.

Kendall waited until he could hear the footsteps disappear down the hall and then quietly made his way over to Riley's computer. He hovered above it, listening intently before he wiped his palms on his jeans as he lowered himself to the ground.

He dragged his finger over the touchpad of her computer and the screen brightened, revealing her desktop background. He couldn't help but smile and laugh when he saw it. It looked to be like a picture that was taken in a photo booth; Riley, Rhuben, Patrick, Noah, Sydney, and even Ronan, managed to squish into the small booth and was making funny faces at the camera.

He scanned the folders on her desktop (Pictures, Music, Demos, BTR Demos) before dragging the mouse over to a folder called Demo Lyrics. He double clicked and the folder immediately opened to show icon after icon after icon of Microsoft Word documents titled with numbers, letters, phrases, and random letters. But, it was the first document ("1. Swear to God") that caught his attention and he opened it. Her computer stalled for a minute and then the document opened. There wasn't a lot in it, (a list of suggested titles, and who wrote the song-all five of them), just some lines of lyrics (in the respective color of the Jacksons to show who wrote what), even being that short, it was still powerful and in his face. He couldn't deny that they really knew how to write.

Kendall read and re-read the lyrics. He didn't think anyone actually understood what he had felt when he was going through things with his dad and here was his new friends who seemed to be able to dig into his mind and just pull out every single thought that he had in his mind.

"Hey, Kendall!" Kendall heard Logan's voice from down the hall. "Kendall, you coming?"

"Um, yeah," Kendall called back, quickly closing out of everything…and his heart dropped when her computer froze "Not Responding" popping up in the title bar of her window. "Shit!" He started clicking rapidly, willing the window to close. The screen went white, still stuck and Kendall raked his fingers through his hair. Logan was getting closer.

"Kendall!"

"Yeah?" Kendall called back, rapidly clicking a few more times before jumping to his feet, trying to put as much distance between himself and Riley's computer as Logan stepped into the room. He peered at Kendall, then at Riley's computer, and then back. "What's up?"

"Riles has some wardrobe designs on her computer," Logan explained, his eyebrows knitting together slightly. "She wanted me to get her computer for her."

"Oh yeah," Kendall replied, swallowing thickly, glancing back over at the computer. He pressed his lips together as he turned back towards Logan, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Ok, look," Logan said with a sigh. "James and Carlos are worried about you. They…didn't know about…your dad until the other day and-"

"I don't want to talk about it," Kendall said, turning his head, scratching at the back of his neck. Logan looked like he was going to say something, but instead just gave a brief nod. Kendall nodded his head towards the door. "You're their best friend-"

Logan let out a weird laugh. "Yeah," he agreed after a moment of silence. "I'm working on that, anyway." Kendall gave him a confused look. "They're my friends it's just gotten harder lately to hang out with them and stuff, that's all." Kendall peered hard at Logan and he shifted his weight from foot to foot.

"What's wrong, Logan? What's going on?"

"Why were you on Riley's computer?"

Silence fell between the two of them as they let each other's questions sink in. Kendall considered not telling Logan a thing, but he was closer friends with the two girls than he was. Logan had known them since they were kids, and he did defend them and ensure to him, James, and Carlos that they were good people. Maybe he knew?

"I've been having all these nightmares lately as you know," Kendall replied and Logan slowly nodded. "I hadn't had them before we got out here." He paused and Logan raised his eyebrows. He hadn't said these next words to anybody, but they had been buzzing around in his mind for a little while. "I think…they're trying to tell me something. Or…warning me."

"What do you mean?" Logan asked.

"Well…it's all about these dreams about how….about what dad did to me," Kendall slowly replied, dropping his gaze to the ground. Logan looked curious about what he wanted to say, but Kendall was starting to feel stupid. It sounded so weird, he could only imagine what he was actually thinking. "I haven't had these dreams until I got out here."

"And…what do you think these dreams are trying to warn you about?" Logan asked quietly and Kendall stayed silent. Logan put up his hands, his eyes widening slightly. "I'm not saying that I don't believe you. There have been many scientific studies about whether or not your dreams can tell the future or-"

"But, they're not telling the future if it's something that's already happened to me," Kendall said with a shake of his head, starting to wish he hadn't brought up the subject. "I just have a bad feeling that…something's going on."

Logan open and closed his mouth an expression Logan couldn't pin point crossing his face before he wiped it of any emotion. "What do you mean?" he asked quietly, looking around the room before looking back at Logan.

"Ok, I'm going to say this once, and I want your honest opinion on t," Kendall said, letting out a deep breath of air. Logan slowly nodded. Kendall pressed his lips together for a moment. "With my dreams…and everything that's happened…I think they're trying to warn me about…the Jacksons. I think…they're being abused…by their dad."

Logan scratched the back of his neck, breaking his gaze from Kendall. He looked all around the room before looking back at him, trying to look nonchalant and Kendall had his answer. "They are?" he asked quietly and Logan gave a slight nod of his head. "And you knew this whole time and didn't say anything?"

"…They made me promise not to tell," Logan said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I've tried talking to all of them, they don't want the help."

"Well…we could go to the police-?" Kendall's words died on his lips as Logan shook his head back and forth. "Why not? We have to go."

"I tried that too," Logan said with a heavy sigh, suddenly looking incredibly tired. "I went to the police and they said they couldn't help unless they had a complaint from someone in the household." A pained expression crossed his face. "Kendall, trust me when I said out of anyone, I wanted to tell you a soon as I fond out. I just couldn't. I promised them and-"

"You didn't want to lose the friendship again," Kendall finished for him. "I get it." Logan nodded weakly. He didn't know what else to say. He didn't think he'd be right. He never imagined that he could be right. In fact, he was hoping he was wrong.

"I think that's why they…the boys...stayed in the Palm Woods with us last night," Logan continued. "It all makes sense now, right? The nightmares, the bed wetting, their attitudes; everything. It's because their father hits them."

"Wait, you told him about my dad?"

Logan turned around and cursed when he saw Riley standing in the doorway. She looked back and forth from Logan to Kendall, her jaw dropped. She then slowly closed it, her jaw jutting out, her eyes seeming to become more piercing than it had been before. Kendall watched as her face slowly turned a bright red. Logan looked back at Kendall, looking scared and worried.

"Well, yes," he said, rubbing his hands together, taking a step towards her. "But, you don't understand. You see—"

"Logan, you promised me," Riley said in a low voice, slowly shaking her head back and forth. "You fucking promised us."

"Look, Riles, I'm sorry I told Kendall about this," Logan said as calmly and as quietly as possible. Kendall just stayed silent. Logan knew her better so he most likely knew how to calm her down better than he could do. "You can trust Kendall. I trust him with my life. I think if we all just talked this out and went to the poli-"

"Why should I trust him?" Riley asked, her eyes narrowing slightly in his direction. "I trusted you and you told him."

"I only told him because-" Logan stopped talking when Kendall reached out his hand and grabbed his shoulder. Logan looked at him out of the corner of his eye and Kendall gave a slight twitch of his head from left to right. Logan looked back over at Riley. "You can trust me, you know that."

"Look, this is stupid, we're all fine," Riley said, crossing her arms over her chest. A spot on her cheek poked out from where she stuck her tongue. She leaned back slightly, glancing up and down the hall before stepping into the room. "So this is why it takes so long to get a fucking computer?" She tilted her head to the side. "You sit around and talk about us behind our backs? And ask a lot of stupid questions?"

"Riles, you don't deserve this," Kendall spoke up and Riley cracked into a weird grin.

"You don't know what I deserve," she replied, shaking her head back and forth. "I sure as hell don't deserve friends like you guys and you just proved why-"

"Look, if we just go to the police, everything will turn out fine," Kendall interrupted her and Riley cut her eyes in his direction.

"Just shut up, Kendall, you're wasting your fucking breath," Riley snapped walking into the room and towards her computer. Kendall quickly glanced at it, letting out a small sigh of relief when it was back at her desktop. "We don't need the police. We're fine. And I'd appreciate it if you didn't spread your little gossip around."

"Riley," Logan said with a heavy sigh.

"Shut up, Logan," Riley snapped, slamming her computer lid shut, tucking it under her arm. As she moved to walk past him, Kendall grabbed her upper arm and pushed up her shirt sleeve, spotting a bruise on her shoulder.

"He did that didn't he?" he asked quietly and Riley pulled her arm away from him. Kendall looked down at the bandage wrapped around her arm. Before he had just thought it was part of her image, a "thing" that was all her own. But, now… "And that? How long-"

"This is the longest I've gone in a new place without someone finding out," Riley commented, dropping her gaze to the floor. "Interesting."

"This isn't funny," Kendall snapped. Riley looked at him and raised her eyebrows.

"Oh yeah, because last time I checked, pain is so funny," she said before rolling her eyes. Logan clicked his tongue, turning to face her. "Don't give me that look. I already know what you're going to say. I'm not going to tell anybody. We're not going to tell anybody. We're safe. We can handle it. We're fine."

"No, you're not fine," Kendall insisted as Riley made her way towards the door again. "If you don't get help, he's going to kill you." Riley paused in the doorway, keeping her back to them.

"He hasn't yet," Riley replied quietly. "He's…he's just mad, and stressed." She then turned around to face him. She looked over at Logan and back at him, her expression softening slightly. "Kendall, if you tell anybody, if the police get involved, we'll be split up."

"But, you'll be safe," Kendall insisted.

"But, we won't be happy," Riley replied. "Rhuben, Patrick, Noah, and Sydney are the only family I have. They need me and I need them. We'll b put into a foster home. They'll take Sydney no problem. Maybe somebody would adopt Patrick and Noah. But, Rhuben and I are too old. We'd be stuck there. And who knows? Maybe our brothers won't be adopted by the same family. Maybe they won't live in the same state." She shook her head. "I can't let that happen."

Kendall stared at her. "You can't always be there to protect them," Kendall said quietly.

"Just watch me," Riley hissed before hurrying off.

"Riley!" Kendall shouted, after her. "Riles!" He moved to hurry after her, but Logan stopped him, flinging out an arm, catching him across the chest. "Logan! Damn it!" He raked his fingers through his hair. "We…let's find Ronan and tell him!"

"Adults want to see what they want to see," Logan said in a strange tone of voice, staring at the spot Riley was just standing. "Ronan's been working with them for so many years." He then turned and looked over at Kendall. "If he knew…don't you think he would've said something by now?"

Kendall was at a loss for words. "We have to do something," he insisted.

"I know," Logan replied with a nod. "I'm already working on that. But, now that you know, I could use your help."

A/N: Sooo, sorry for the delay in this chapter! But, it was my favorite one to do so far. I hope you all enjoyed it. So you have Kendall dealing with this himself, with Katie, and next chapter will be with his mom. I know Lakeland Center isn't in Orlando, but it helps with chapters near the end of the story.

SoccerLaxGod25: You'll have the answer to your question in the next chapter.

Cheers,

-Rhuben