Hello everyone! this Chapter is dedicated to this person in my class- I remembered A speech he made about the bird conspiricy! i remembered how funny it was and decided to put a bit of it on cat news! Please enjoy this lovely chapter! No flames no annoying my for grammar or spelling either i kind of wrote this in 5 minutes lawl.

"hello and welcome back to cat news!" Sandstorm purred slowly combing Firestars hair, with the most crazy expression on her face. She had tied up Firestar about 30 minutes ago.

"yes welcome" Firestar squeaked, and with a short quiet whisper he whimpered "help?"

"don't worry it will be all over soon" sandstorm purred- looking even more crazy combing Firestars hair even harder while firestar started crying in fear.

"Uhm anyhow- we're here with cloudtail who has some news." Graystripe purred putting on his serious face for the first time.

"Alright so I have a very important story this good afternoon" Cloudtail said slowly wandering around the room. "YOU!" cloudtail said lifting up sandstorms chin. "I find your craziness very attractice young lady. But that's not our news" Cloudtail meowed walking back to his seat, while sandstorm blushed going back to combing firestar hair. "firestar was caught this morning, Eating breakfast innocently in spottedleafs house."

Sandstorm hissed "Darn right he did!" She hissed combing Firestars hair even harder than before making his fur poof out 10x its original length.

"Sandstorm of course quickly tied firestar up- as you see now- amd is now punishing him after she dragged him here am I right?" Cloudtail asked while everyone nodded quietly. "Now here's what happened I walked in and asked Spottedleaf, why was firestar here?"

Everyone leaned forward in anticipation.

"She said, Firestar needed a quick meal- he ran out of his house in a rush, I asked him why, and he said softly Tigerstar- I need Tigerstar. She stopped for a moment, and said- Someything very odd is happening. I have a prophecy but bluestar that bchti told be I have to tell you all in 3 and a half weeks so yah. Total BS" Cloudtail said, very seriously. "So I came to this conclusion- Tigerstar is wearing boxers now, He's not shoving cheese down his pants and his attitude is comepletely different- WHICH BRINGS US ALL TO THIS! Tigerstar is going to attack- again and I think its Windclan." Cloudtail hissed.

"Firestar! HOW COULD YOU commit to this conspiracy!?" sandstorm hissed smacking firestar making his hair un-poof itself.

"OUCH! Hey! I wanted to ask him where he kept his thongs after he got rid of them- Leafpaw and Squirrelflight wanted them!!" Firestar hissed, sandstorm started to put scrunchies and hair clips all in his fur.

"It's like the bird conspiracy" Brambleclaw hissed in the Darkness.

"What?" all the cats meowed in anticipation.

"The biiirds! I said the birds! Don't you notice them?" Brambleclaw hissed popping out of the shadows- he appeared before everyone, much furrier than before, he needed a fur-cut. He's eyes were full of fear and he was randomly wearing a wizard hat, and held a staff for some odd reason.

"What about them?" Graystripe asked shivering.

"Don't you notice? Whenever you walk up to them they fly away- WHAT ARE THEY RUNNING AWAY FROM?? What are they keeping from us??" Brambleclaw hissed with rage, everyone looked around at each other in fear.

"And then- There is pet birds! They are spies! Watching what we do- trying to learn our weakness' and then! They say if a bird poops on you its good luck- well WHAT IF IT'S A TRACKING SYSTEM??" Brambleclaw gasped while he ran back into the shadows, everyone looked around for birds.

"remember- you didn't hear it form me, or else they'll look for me and I'll e dead within the hour" Brambleclaw whispered and disappeared.

Everyone sat back at their desks and whispered "commercials…"

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Ooh cat news!

"Anyhow! Since your all scared I'll just do the stupid weather- look out your window OKAY? YOU GOT THAT? YOUR WINDOW!" silverstream meowed

"but the birds are out the window!" Graystripe cried.

"Oh you're all acting like frightened KITS! Its cloudy" Silverstream hissed.

"Well we should conclude this episode- We're too frightened to say anything- or the birds or even tigerstar might kill us all! Byebye!" Graystripe trembled.

Read and review please- no flamerzzzzzzz