Author's Note posted below.
Part 3
Chapter 8
So many lies.
So many deceits.
So many people wanting to keep us apart.
I didn't know why but the odds weren't always on our side. Yes, we were at fault. We had been so immature in the past and even until now. For some reason, there had always been a push and pull between us. The saddest part was that when we try to work things out, strange things will occur. Those who never wanted us to be together would always find a way to tear us apart.
Not now. Not anymore. Not ever.
A pang of pain struck my heart as I've realized that Sierra was the most affected because of all the drama between Ana and me. To be honest, "us" is just not about Ana and me, it's about the three of us.
There were so many things I needed to do. I wanted to hurt all of my family members for ever setting us apart and putting us in our misery. I wanted to hate myself for the lack of faith towards Ana. I wanted to hate Ana because of the roller coaster ride she caused. I also wanted to curse this situation because life shouldn't be so messy like this.
But with my daughter—my little butterfly, there's neither room nor space for hatred. I needed to be the best person I can be for her. She's the girl who affected every aspect of my life. Because of her, I urged to strive as a great man, father, and businessman.
I needed to be the best Christian Grey, so hatred must be dealt with later.
Sierra always comes first.
After I have checked on my company, I grabbed my phone and took a deep breath before dialling Andrea's number. It rang and rang and I didn't even realize that she was currently on tour. She's in Puerto Rico right now. Her 'Cassiopeia: A Star to Behold' World Tour was earning massive of millions and I really was a bad boyfriend for never calling her.
I left her a voicemail.
"Andrea, I am really sorry for everything. You've been so good with me, so great really but I cannot do this anymore. I am so sorry. I really am. I hope the best for you."
Then I turned my phone off and bowed down my head. I felt so guilty for breaking her heart, but I knew that it was for the best. She had always given me all of her best efforts but I couldn't ever give mine.
I think that's part of why life's so complicated and why some people seem to be so unhappy. Guilt is mistaken for love. The best relationships are "I love you because I love you" and not "I love you because you love me." If relationships were all like that and there's a higher chance they will last.
You can't ever stay with someone because of guilt.
Then I raised my head up at the same time the sun spread its ray across the room.
Today signals a new day.
~S.A.~
Tiny footsteps were heard followed by louder ones. I was becoming so fidgety. Three long years since I've cooked this much food and cared how it will be judged. Becky and Mayor were already sitting, looking like they've seen a ghost. They were really shocked that I was being like this, guard down.
"Daddy?! OHHHHHH! FOOOD!" Sierra screamed with so much joy and Juliana barked loudly and jumped. Sierra sat on her chair and smelled all the food I've prepared. There were a lot, to be frank: bacons, hotdogs, sausages, eggs, name it and it's there as long as it falls under the category of breakfast.
"You cooked all of these, Daddy?"
"Yes, baby," I kissed her forehead and she hugged so tight.
"Hey, what's going on—oh . . ." Ana stepped foot inside the kitchen and couldn't believe her eyes. In fact, she wiped her eyes first before fully recognizing that she went inside a room for breakfast festival.
F0r the first time since I've arrived in New York, it didn't hurt looking at her. I eyed her from head to toe and she was far from perfect. Her hair was the worst kind of haystack, her lips cracked, her eyes still sleepy, and her breath probably smelled gross. Yet, she's the most perfect girl I've ever seen.
She'll never understand but it's true.
"Let's eat?" I asked while pulling a chair out for her.
Her grandparents were both shocked while Sierra can't help but blush. I've noticed just now that she and her mother seemed to be like twins especially when their cheeks were equally red. Ana sat down, looking shy as if we were teenagers.
"Wow! Christian, this is . . . wow!" Ana was lost in words as all of us were eating.
"Today we're going out. Just you, me, and Sierra," I announced and she looked at me in awe. Sierra, on the other hand, screamed in so much happiness.
"Oh my Gosh! I am so happy hearing that! That's awesome!" Becky expressed then later shifted her voice saying the same thing. She added three unconvincing coughs.
"Becks, don't need to pretend, okay? I know you're not sick."
She looked like I slapped her, "WHAT?! SINCE WHEN?!"
"Since the day I came here," I answered and I swore she wanted to cry.
In one of the rarest moments, Mayor was laughing so much his stomach hurt. "See? Dear, Christian knew it since the first day. That means I won the bet."
"What bet?" I questioned.
"If I was right that you weren't fooled by Becky, then we would go to a classical concert full of 1800's music. If it's the other way around then we'd be attending the concert of The Chainsmokers."
"Ugh! I hate music like those! It makes me feel so old!" Becky was acting like a child.
"You are old, Gran Gran. Very old. Like a hundred years old!" My daughter dropped a huge shade on her great grandmother. We all laughed at how insulted Becky looked but just rolled her eyes. Only Sierra's allowed to call her old.
I glanced at Ana and we laughed at each other. Then, I noticed that there was catsup just at the right corner of her mouth. My thumb wiped it and I almost got electrocuted with our skins touching.
Her eyes sparkled, telling me she felt it too.
We looked at the three of them and they looked so happy especially Sierra whose blush were added up with giggles.
Everything seemed okay after three long years.
~S.A.~
We spent the entire day roaming around New York but lingered longer in the park.
Of course, bodyguards surrounded us but it was fine. The car ride was really funny as Sierra never went out of it if I didn't memorize "How Far I'll Go" from Moana. She told me that she's Moana and Juliana's HeiHei. It bummed me knowing that that character wasn't a dog but a chicken.
"See the line where the sky meets the sea, it's amazing!"
"Daddy, NO! You are wrong! It calls me! That's correct. It's amazing is wrong! Sing it again!"
Instead of helping me out, Ana just laughed. Wow. Her entire body shook as I struggled memorizing a Disney song. Sierra was really angry. I never thought being a father required too many talents. First, I was working for her imaginary salon combing Barbie's hair and now I was a singer about the sea and sailing.
Well, she's the boss.
After an hour and thirty minutes, I finally memorized it and three of us sang it together. It's unfair how Ana already memorized the song.
We lingered mostly in the park. It wasn't just the three of us since Juliana was around too. Apparently, she's Sierra's best friend. The only time Sierra allowed Juliana to be away was when she needed to go to school. She understood that dogs were not allowed to study. We were chasing each other on the green grass and Juliana always came to the point of licking me.
The laughter was a sound automatically recorded in a diary. The happiness that we experienced while playing like little kids, like a family was something to never forget.
We sat down for a picnic and Sierra was sitting on my lap, Juliana on Ana's.
"Your dog's special, isn't she? She has four legs!"
"Wow!"
Ana, being the storyteller she is, said, "Sierra, Juliana has two arms and two legs!"
"Where did she come from Mommy?"
I answered it, "You see, Sierra. There's this thing called pregnancy and Juliana was a puppy who came out of her mother. Let's just say she was inside her mother's stomach for a while before she came out in this earth."
That made Sierra think so much. I realized Ana was scowling at me. Damn! Shit! I got too scientific on her.
"If Juliana was in her mother's tummy, was I in Mommy's tummy too?"
"Yes, you were," I answered.
"How did I get there?"
I coughed not knowing how to respond. She's too young to learn about sex!
Ana saved the day with her wide imagination, "Well, your daddy gave me a magical seed and you grew inside me."
I couldn't help but laugh. It sounded like it's for kids but there was an innuendo.
"Well, okay!" Sierra let it all go and we spent the rest of the day playing with the slides and swings.
The seesaw was really fun.
We were family.
~S.A.~
The night replaced the day and the three of us were completely knock out.
The three of us were lying on Sierra's bed, muscles aching because of the active well-spent day. Sierra was between Ana and me and we were hugging her. Despite her sleep eyes she looked beneath the blanket and gave a goofy smile.
"What is it, Sierra?" Ana's voice was drowsy.
"Mommy, there's six feet! You and Daddy and me!"
My heart swelled. I kissed her cheek and promised, "It will always be six feet, Sierra."
Ana gave me a meaningful look but she was too tired to care. She fell asleep almost at the same second as Sierra did.
I looked at my girls and recalled this day. I've never been this happy in all of my life.
My hands extended to reach Ana's hairstrands. I played with them for a while and that's when I completely swallowed my pride and realized that I've never stopped loving her. She's always been it for me.
We played the seesaw today and I never thought it would give meaning.
We have always been a seesaw, Ana and me. She goes down with her feelings then I go up. I go down then she goes up. There was the lack of timing and a matter of opposites. Never up and up, and never down and down. The seesaw kind of love. Then, Sierra sat in the middle of the seesaw then there was balance.
We were seeing eye to eye, neither up nor down at the same time but balanced.
She loves me, and I love her.
I'll work this out. We'll work this out.
Those were my thoughts before falling asleep.
Author's Note: Thanks to all of you who inspire me to write this story.
This is the lightest chapter I've ever written!
Thanks for reading.
Margo.