So sorry again for the long wait. :( I lost my focus on the story for a while, but I think it's back now. :) This chapter is a little shorter than the last couple, but it's not too bad—and it was the only way to update without waiting for another week. Sorry for any typos; I'll admit, I only proofread this once, and there's currently a concert going on across the street that is killing my concentration, but I think I caught all, or most of the mistakes. :)

X X X

I can't remember how it all began to break
You suffer, I live to fight and die another day

~~Breaking Benjamin—Fade Away

X X X

A piercing, incessant buzzing filled the room, wrenching me awake. I slammed my hand down on the alarm clock and was rewarded with a loud crash as it was knocked to the ground. "Damn it," I muttered. I fumbled with the light switch on my lamp, managing to turn it on after a couple of tries, and groaned as I saw the glass on the alarm clock had cracked. It seemed to still be ticking though, so I put it back on the nightstand for the time being.

I could hear the shower already running, so I changed quickly into my work clothes and headed to the kitchen to make breakfast. I grabbed things out of the fridge automatically, too tired to pay much attention. It had been almost three in the morning before I'd gotten to sleep. I couldn't get the sound of Soda's pleading voice out of my head. I didn't understand how he could defend Pony after what had happened. How could he think it was his fault that Pony had hit him?

"Morning."

I nearly jumped out of my skin at the unexpected voice behind me. I spun around to find Two-Bit standing in the kitchen doorway. "Geez, Two-Bit," I grumbled, turning back to the stove and throwing the bacon in the pan. "Don't scare me like that."

"Sorry, Dare. You knew I was here," he said, helping himself to a glass of juice.

I stared at him blankly. "What do you mean, I knew? I don't keep tabs on you."

He checked over his shoulder quickly before turning back to me. "It was my turn to keep an eye on Soda," he explained.

Realization dawned on me and I sighed. "Right. Sorry, Two-Bit."

He waved it off before fixing me with a concerned look. "You feeling okay, Superman?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I lied, cracking the eggs into a second pan. "I just didn't sleep well last night." The truth was, I was exhausted; I would've slept straight through till tomorrow morning if someone had let me. That was out of the question, though. Even if I called in sick to work, there was too much else to deal with.

"If you say so."

I glared at him, but he ignored it, instead just sitting back and watching me cook.

"Hi," a soft voice came from the doorway. Pony was standing there, rubbing his arm and looking between me and Two-Bit uncertainly. Everything I'd wanted to scream at him the night before came rushing back. I stepped towards him, prepared to give him the worst lecture he'd ever had, when Two-Bit stopped me.

"Darry," he warned, looking pointedly at Soda's closed door.

"You're damn lucky, kid," I spat at Ponyboy, who winced. I finished making breakfast quickly and tossed the food onto four plates. Soda wasn't up yet, and I didn't plan to go get him. I wasn't too thrilled that he was letting Pony off the hook so easy. I knew he just wanted everything to go back to normal, but letting Pony treat him like that wouldn't help anything.

Pony scarfed down his food as fast as he could, avoiding eye contact. After a few minutes of tense silence, I couldn't take it anymore. "Why'd you do it, Pony?"

From the corner of my eye, I saw Two-Bit shake his head, trying to get me to stop, but I ignored him. Pony sighed and finally looked up. "I don't know, Darry. I wasn't thinking straight."

"That's it? You weren't thinking straight?" I snapped. I could hear my voice rising, but I didn't care. Enough was enough. "What the hell kind of excuse is that, Pony?"

He glared at me furiously. "And what's wrong with that reason? It's the same one you had when you did it!" He pushed his chair back, not bothering to pick it up when it crashed to the floor. I sat frozen in place as he stormed down the hall to his room.

Two-Bit suddenly threw his fork down and stood up. "Damn it, Darry. You couldn't just let it drop?" He shook his head and muttered something under his breath before stalking out of the house.

"Darry?"

Shit.

Soda stood in the doorway looking for all the world as if I had just hit him, too. I groaned; this morning just kept getting better and better.

"Breakfast is on the table," I *muttered. Nothing I said could make any difference at this point. I'd told him I'd drop it and I hadn't. The damage was done.

Soda ate in silence, his eyes glued to his plate. He looked as tired as I felt and I wondered if he'd had more nightmares last night. At this rate, it would only be a matter of time before he passed out from exhaustion again. When he'd finished, I took his plate to soak in the sink and scraped the rest of my breakfast into the trash. I hadn't had much appetite to begin with, and after the argument with Pony, it had entirely disappeared.

"Go get dressed," I instructed him. "I'll drive you to work."

"It's okay," he mumbled. "I can walk."

I sighed. I was tempted to just let him walk if he was going to be stubborn, but there was no way in hell I wanted to leave him alone when he was like this. "Go get dressed," I ordered.

"God, Darry, I'm not an invalid! I can walk. You're gonna be late if you wait for me."

I gritted my teeth and gripped the back of a chair. "The longer you take, the later I'll be, so get moving." I knew my tone didn't leave any room for argument. Soda glared, but he left to go get dressed. It didn't take long for him to come back.

"What about Pony?" he asked.

"What about him?"

"He's still in his room. Aren't you gonna drive him to school?"

"Quit worrying about Pony and start worrying more about yourself," I snapped. "It's your first day back to work and the last thing you need is to get fired for being late. Pony's a big boy, he can walk to school."

Soda muttered a few choice words under his breath before brushing past me and slamming the front door behind him. I took a deep breath, trying to keep my temper in check. Right then, I wanted nothing more than to knock some sense into both him and Ponyboy.

Scratch that. What I really wanted was to make the people who had hurt Soda in the first place pay.

Outside, the truck horn blared. Sighing, I laced up my work boots and headed out.

X X X

"Hey! Earth to Darrel!"

"Huh?" I looked up in confusion, trying to figure out who was calling me, and cringed when I realized it was my boss. "Sorry, Mr. Jackson. What do you need?"

He frowned and shook his head at me. "What I need is for my best worker to snap out of whatever daydream you were in and pay attention. What's going on, anyway?"

"It's nothing, sir," I said quickly, grabbing a bundle of roofing tiles.

He stepped into my path and grabbed the bundle, forcing me to drop it back to the ground. "Don't give me that bullshit, Curtis. What the hell's been going on with you this past week? You look like a walking corpse. You didn't even shave this morning."

I rubbed my hand over my chin and swore when I felt the stubble. "Sorry, sir. It won't happen again."

He rolled his eyes at me. "Christ, Darrel. I don't care about that. What I care about is you not shaving. It ain't normal. Now, are you gonna tell me what's going on or am I gonna have to send you home so you can get some sleep?"

I tried to suppress a groan. With Soda's hospital bills, I couldn't afford time off. Not to mention, home was the last place I wanted to be right now. "It's my brother, sir. He's been having a rough time since he got back home and this week was worse than most."

Mr. Jackson's features softened some. "It's been a couple months. Have you taken him to see anyone?"

"He talked to a doctor at the hospital, but it didn't do much."

"Wilson?"

I nodded, surprised he knew the name.

"He's an ass. My sister went to him after she miscarried. He took her money and didn't do a Goddamn thing to help her. Try Carson, she swore by him."

"Carson?" I asked, dumbfounded. I'd expected Mr. Jackson to chew me out, tell me to keep family and work separate. I sure as hell hadn't expected advice.

"Yeah, Carson's got a private practice not that far from the hospital. He's a little more expensive, but he'll actually do something for ya. I can probably swing you some extra hours around here if ya need them."

"Uh, yeah," I stammered, still trying to wrap my head around the conversation. "That'd be great. I'm not sure Soda's gonna agree to it, though." I thought about how adamant Soda had been about avoiding doctors in the first place; I was sure he'd be even more against it after the past week.

"Well, when he's ready, send him over there. He'll like this guy, I promise. Now, you gonna be okay to finish the day?"

I nodded mutely and he walked away, apparently satisfied.

X X X

"Morning, Steve."

I looked up from the toast I was buttering and smiled at Evie. "Morning."

"What time did you get in last night?" she asked, putting a couple of pieces of bread into the toaster.

I shrugged. "Around one, I think." She nodded, but didn't answer, instead starting to leaf through the newspaper. I fiddled with the toast left on my plate, suddenly not hungry anymore. A silent Evie was never a good sign and an angry Evie was the last thing I wanted. With everything else going on, she was the only thing holding me together. I couldn't lose her. "Are you mad?" I asked nervously, already knowing the answer.

She looked up at me and glared. "You could've called. I didn't have a clue where the hell you were."

I sighed. "I'm sorry, Evie. I just needed to blow off some steam. Besides, you can't know where I am all the time. You have to trust me." I bit my lip, hoping I hadn't just set her off worse.

She frowned. "I do trust you, Steve. It's just, I feel like I've hardly seen you this past week. I was looking forward to spending some time with you."

Guilt started to creep in as I realized why she was upset. I'd spent almost all my free time with Soda, mostly just seeing Evie in passing. Until Pony had pissed me off, I'd been looking forward to spending the night with her, too.

"I'm sorry," I sighed. "I know I've been gone a lot lately. But you know I'm with Soda, right? There's nothing else going on."

She chuckled and I felt myself relax. "I know, Steve. I told you, I trust you. And I'm glad you're trying to help Soda, I really am. I just figured that since Two-Bit was going to be there last night, you'd be home."

"I was gonna be."

"So why weren't you?"

I felt my anger from the previous night return as I remembered how Pony had treated Soda. "Ponyboy just pissed me off. I needed to get out for a while."

"He still isn't talking to Soda?" she asked sadly.

I shook my head. "No, and it's really taking its toll on Sodapop. He thinks he deserves how Pony's treating him. I'm not sure how much longer he can handle it."

Evie sighed and shook her head. I wondered briefly who she wanted to smack more: Pony for acting like an asshole, or Soda for accepting it. "You want me to talk to him?"

"You mean Pony?" I asked. She nodded and I scoffed. "You can try, but I don't think even you can penetrate that thick skull of his."

Evie didn't answer; instead she silently collected the dirty dishes and put them in the sink. "Don't push it with Pony," she spoke up after a minute. "You know he won't listen to you. He might come around with time, but hearing constant lectures from everyone is just going to make him more stubborn."

I sighed and nodded, knowing she was right. "So what am I supposed to do, then?"

"Just be there for Soda," she said, smiling softly. "Make sure he's okay and safe. For now, that's all anyone can do."

X X X

Not where I had planned to end it, but I sorta like it. As always, I love to hear what you think!