Chapter 36: Clarification for Clara

Clara was still knelt down by the grave of one Miss Clara Oswin Oswald. Although the Doctor was still with her, she had never felt so alone. The amount of images she was trying to work out was enough to give anyone a headache.

She knew the Doctor was struggling to find the words to say. This showed her that he knew more than he was telling.

"Who…" she began, "Who was she?"

The Doctor sighed. "Why do you think I know who she was?" he questioned, "It's just a coincidence."

"Oh come on Doctor!" she cried, "Clara isn't a common name, neither the surname Oswald and above all, have you ever met anyone else with the name 'Oswin'?"

The Doctor shook his head slowly. "No…" he admitted.

Clara sighed and turned to face him. "So who was she?" she questioned, "I know ya knew 'er. Those 'images' I just saw where 'er memories, and you were a big part of them."

The Doctor, who was still crouched near to her, knelt down in order to take the weight off his ankles. He then proceeded to sit down on the ground and cross his legs. Clara watched as he began to fiddle with his fingers while he debated what to say to her.

Vastra and Jenny had not long ago left the two of them alone so there was nothing to be heard apart from the Doctor as he attempted to speak. However, he just couldn't find the words.

"Was she me?" asked Clara after a moment.

He looked over at her and shook his head. "No." he replied, "But yes."

Clara frowned. "I don't understand." she confessed.

The Doctor sighed. "She was a woman who was the spitting image of you." he explained, "Her name was Clara Oswald, she worked as a barmaid at The Rose and Crown and as a governess for Francesca and Digby Latimer under the name 'Miss Montague'."

Clara cocked her head to the side slightly as her thoughts ran back through the images which she had just seen when she touched the headstone.

"The two children…" she whispered before looked back at the Doctor, "I saw them."

The Doctor nodded. "They were there." he confirmed, "They worshiped her, especially Digby."

Clara sighed. "Am I the same person as 'er?" she questioned.

The Doctor shook his head. "No." he confirmed, "There are similarities between the two of you, but you're not the same person. You were born in 1988, she was born in 1866."

Clara shook her head slightly. "What similarities were there?" she asked.

"Um… she was intelligent, much more advanced for her time, just like you." he responded.

Clara nodded and looked away. It was too much to take in...

She bit her lip and sighed when she realised something. "That's 'ow ya knew me, ain't it? That's 'ow ya knew my name before I met ya." she stated, "It's because ya knew 'er."

The Doctor nodded before looking up at her. "Yeah." he verified.

The Doctor watched as she looked away and futilely tried to hide the fact her eyes were watering.

"That's why Vastra and Jenny were so shocked to see me…" she pointed out, "Why Strax said I looked familiar… They knew 'er, you all knew 'er."

The Doctor watched and she rubbed her forehead. He desperately wanted to comfort her but he was afraid to approach just in case she pushed him away.

"It all makes sense now." she continued before looking down at the headstone.

She read through the writing on it and gulped when she saw the date of death: 24th December 1892.

"If she hadn't died, you wouldn't 'ave come lookin' for me, would ya?" she questioned after a moment, "She'd be travellin' with you instead, not me."

"Clara, please don't make something out of nothing." he begged, "I'll admit I was upset when she died, but I'm glad that she led me to you."

Clara sighed and looked down, letting a couple of tears escape her eyes. She wasn't exactly sure why she was crying. It definitely wasn't because she was angry or upset; she was just seriously confused, and terrified. Somehow, she wasn't alone in the universe and that knowledge scared the hell out of her.

"How did she die?" Clara questioned.

The Doctor gulped and bit his lip. "She… fell," he answered, "A long, long way."

Clara raced back through the memories of the other Clara.

"Did something pull her… or something like that?" she asked.

The Doctor turned to her. "What have you seen?" he questioned in response.

"I… she was being pulled away from the TARDIS. It was dark and she fell… really fast." she recalled, "It was like what 'appened to me in my nightmare… I was falling, away from you."

The Doctor nodded and looked down at the ground.

"Yeah." he confirmed quietly, "That was her."

It hurt him to think about her death. He still blamed himself for it.

While he tried to block out the memories, Clara shuffled closer to him.

"Doctor?" she asked.

He jumped slightly as her voice brought him back to reality.

"What?" he enquired with a weak smile.

"Is that what Winters meant when she said I was 'the woman twice dead'?" she questioned.

The Doctor shrugged his shoulders. "I suppose so." he agreed.

"So, when was the other time?" she asked, her soft voice stabbing him like a knife.

He shook his head. "I don't know." he fibbed.

"You're lyin' to me." stated Clara, "Please don't do that."

The Doctor let out a breath he didn't realise he was holding.

"I met another woman like you." he disclosed to her, "She was intelligent, way beyond her time, flirtatious, cheeky…"

The Doctor saw her smile slightly which he soon duplicated. "Sound familiar?" he questioned.

Clara nodded and looked up at him.

"Her name was Oswin." he continued, "She was a Junior Entertainment Manager for a Starship."

Clara sighed. "And she died?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yeah." he admitted.

Clara rubbed her head as she took in yet another piece of the puzzle. This was seriously getting too much...

"Did she look like me?" Clara asked.

The Doctor shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know, I never saw her face." he confessed, "However, she did have the same voice…"

Clara gulped and ran her hand through her hair. "So, what are they?" she asked, "What am I?"

"I don't know." he replied, "I know you're all human and I know that all three of you are different versions of the same woman."

Clara shook her head in disbelief. "How is that possible?" she enquired.

The Doctor shook his head. "It's not." he said.

Clara's jaw dropped slightly and she gasped at that statement. She proceeded to rub her eyes and temples as the information literally began to hurt her head.

"So what the 'ell am I?" she cried, "Am I real?!"

The Doctor frowned and nodded adamantly. "Of course you're real." he responded.

Clara laughed slightly. "Am I?" she questioned, "Because up until I met you, my village was too."

"Clara…" he whispered before interlocking his fingers with his hand, "I promise you, you're real."

Clara smiled softly as he kissed the back of her hand. It wasn't hard to say that she was completely baffled with what the Doctor had just revealed to her. She was just glad that she had him. She honestly didn't know what she'd do if he wasn't there.

If she was honest, she was slightly annoyed that he had hidden this from her but when she thought about it rationally, he had only done that to keep her protected. How do you explain to someone that there are different versions of them scattered throughout time and space?

Thanks to all this new information, there was one thing she now definitely wanted to do and that was to find out why. Why was she like this? Why was she not alone in the universe?

"Doctor?" she asked after a few minutes of silence.

She was now leaning on his shoulder so he kissed the top of her head before responding.

"Yes?" he enquired.

"Is what's happenin' to me the same as what's happenin' to Bronwin and Nathalie and Raine and the others?" she asked.

The Doctor sighed. "I don't know." admitted the Doctor, "I don't know what's happening to you or them."

Clara sighed. "I'm scared…" she confessed.

The Doctor looked down at her. "Why?" he questioned.

Clara bit her lip. "Whatever the reason is that I'm scattered throughout the universe, there must be something powerful controlling it, right?"

The Doctor nodded. "I suppose." he agreed.

"So, what else might it do to me?" she asked, "I mean, why is this happenin'? What am I?"

The Doctor was about to say something when he suddenly felt an almighty burn appear on the back of his hand.

"Ow!" he cried as he pulled away from Clara to examine the cause.

Clara immediately became alert and saw the Doctor rub the back of his hand on his sleeve. Whatever he rubbed off began to make it jacket singe but she figured that rather his jacket than his hand.

"What was that?" she questioned after seeing a large red mark appear on the back of his hand.

The Doctor immediately looked up at the sky which was hastily being covered by dark storm clouds. His eyes widened and he quickly glanced down at his watch.

"Doctor?" asked Clara.

He looked up at her and gulped.

"Come on, we've gotta get back to the house!" he cried.

He grabbed her wrist with his other hand and they began to run.

"Why?" questioned Clara, "What's happenin'?"

"The rain." he replied, "Vastra said it comes like clockwork, six o'clock every night."

Clara nodded. "And what time is it now?" she asked as they ran up the already deserted street.

"5:59." he answered.