Ch. 34

Captain Hunks listened to Alice with equal patience and trepidation. Although she spoke calmly on the phone and in code as she had been taught (one never knew who was listening) her voice had an edge. To say the least, the news was very grim. He almost wished she was hysterical so at least her emotions had an outlet. Yet, her nobility was also an ever-present shadow. At times this shadow helped her, concealed her; and other times, like now, it was almost an oppressive force.

"My sword just nicked his spleen," she said, "so they believe they can repair that with little effort." She paused. "You need to send Dr. Caplan right away, sir," she said. "He's really sick, I think. They…they took X-rays and…and they're not even sure what they're looking at, but…it's in his head and side, and…and it needs to come out. It means brain surgery, sir!"

Captain Hunks swallowed hard. Alice told him the bulk of what happened, including the tragic fact that in the middle of his deluded state, Oland ended up killing two people. Since those people were part of the 906 group, their innocence was dubious at best. However, once they learned Dr. Steinenburg was dead, they had seemingly surrendered…and he murdered them with deliberate efficiency.

It wasn't uncommon for a shell-shocked soldier to see his fallen comrades…or worse, the ghosts of his slaughtered enemies, as clear as day. Guilt could twist the mind worse than any drug; speaking of which, apparently Oland's bloodwork was a mess, too.

"They said whatever it is that's in his head, it's secreting something, and it's like he OD'ed right before he attacked!" Alice said.

She then spoke of Lionel Taylor's betrayal and sudden disappearance, and of Stecchin's bravery and brushes with death. Hunks' grip tightened on the receiver. He wanted to kill Oreldo and Martis for letting her face such dangers, but knowing the guys as well as he did, he knew they had tried their best. Not to mention the fact that the royal guard, Alan, had given his life.

Hunks cursed under his breath. The Silver Wheel. Conspiracy theorists had a field day with them both during and after the war. Hunks knew just enough to avoid any whiff of them.

He gazed at his desk, at the two smashed "bugs" he'd found. He'd asked 1st Lieutenant Webner look at them, and her findings were disturbing. Though she had never laid eyes on them before, she discovered their purpose was to transmit audio. However, she couldn't trace exactly where to, since there were no wires. The signal seemed to relay all over the place, trickier than following the footsteps of a fox.

Now that Major Connery had confided in him, and had halted the bulk of Section I's operations until they were certain all of the bugs have been found, communications between Section One, Two and Three were decidedly smoother. Section Two was only too happy to gather intelligence on who might be capable of making such a thing. After all, relations with the Republic were still far too dicey to not consider them a suspect. The treaty was called Thin Ice…and the Ice could be melting.

He kept quiet until he heard Alice run out of steam. He sighed and felt like he aged ten years in less than twenty minutes.

"Understood, Lieutenant," he said, gathering his wits to prepare to face Caplan, "I will get the doctor on a chopper if I have to. Now, what about the Princess and General Ulric?"

"Oreldo is in charge of that as we speak. Last I saw, Martis had the remote control device and was looking to decipher it and release the 906 from those suits."

"Is the Corporal being operated on now?"

"Yes, but only for the sword wound. They aren't sure yet how to proceed. They thought of consulting every available brain surgeon in the region, but I put a stop to that, sir."

"Oh? And how?"

Alice paused. "I called in a favor…to His Majesty."

"Good," Hunks said, then groaned. "I wish we could call everybody in, but we can't expose his secret. We're going to owe King Octavius a huge debt for keeping this quiet. But that was swift thinking on your part."

"Thank you, sir."

"If the Corporal is going to be holed up in the hospital, then you should probably head back and help find the Princess."

Silence again. Hunks felt the air change, even though they were miles apart.

"I'm sorry, sir," she said. "I cannot do that."

Something that had been nagging at him for the past few months reared its ugly head.

"Lieutenant," he said, his voice slightly more stern, "I'm sure the Corporal is in good hands."

"And I'm sure you're right, sir," she replied, "but I will not abandon him. Not again. With this new threat, plus the news of the Invisible Nine slowly but surely leaking out, there's a chance that if I leave, he will suddenly disappear again. Death records are easily faked, after all."

It was a fact Hunks knew all too well. How many times had Lady Kavi been known to "die," only to resurface half a year later?

"I have full confidence my team can do the job without me, sir," Alice continued. "I will monitor Oland's progress, and inform you of any changes."

Saddened, Hunks knew not to press the issue. His worst fears had been confirmed. Lord Malvin wasn't going to like learning another daughter had fallen in love with a soldier. At least the soldier Lady Solice married was a Major-General, though that was little comfort to His Lordship. It caused a huge scandal, but Solice had the same stubborn streak as the rest of her family line. Hunks remembered the latest rumors were that Lady Solice was in a family way, which he knew was the polite term for expecting her first child. If true, he wondered Alice knew about it yet.

As for the other sister, Lady Ellis, her choice had been even worse. Her husband was a lowly financial clerk, but apparently they had fallen head over heels and it was a done deal in less than a year.

Hunks paused. Lord Hoost had taken Lord Paolo's position as head of the Financial District since the near-massacre at the Winter Ball. Had it been almost a year already? Still, Alice had a connection there that could be useful, and no doubt Lord Schultz knew the man well. He made a note of it for later.

For now, he said his farewells to Alice and nearly ran to the Caplan Institute, Mercury bounding right beside him, happy to finally go on another adventure.

Earlier…

Oland became aware he was in a void. At first he thought it was that same damned nightmare, for he knew he was naked and saw blood on the ground. When he saw Alice before him, not as his Valkyrie, but just herself, he realized what he was seeing wasn't the same.

Alice was on her knees, utterly despondent. Crouching beside her, he saw her sweet face had been bruised. He was horrified and furious at the same time…until he remembered that the one who had struck her had been himself. He looked to the side and saw two dark puddles of ooze, still bubbling and smoldering like a peat bog. The guilt crushed him. Those puddles had been people.

His thoughts seemed to echo. No, not again! What have I done? He looked down and was shocked to see Alice was actually kneeling next to his own body.

Am I…dead? Nervous, he looked around; braced himself for the hands of his enemies…but no one attacked him. He was alone. He gazed at his poor, scarred and injured shell.

Huh, I'm in worse shape than I thought, he mused with a wry laugh. He tried to feel his own face to see if he still had scars, but he realized he had no hands and no body at all.

He watched as a drop of water splashed on the countenance of his husk. Startled, he looked at Alice. Her head was bent, and she was trying to stay strong, but it was clear she was in a lot of pain. She was speaking, but he couldn't hear her well. He wanted to move her hair aside to see if she was really crying. He longed to comfort her somehow, but couldn't.

Oh, Alice, he thought, his big heart full of sorrow. Don't cry. Not over this broken old soldier. I'm not even worthy of your tears. Maybe…maybe it's better this way. No more suffering, no more having to hurt people.

The darkness seemed to gather around him. He still saw no one, but he suddenly felt colder, weary and tired.

If Hell is all that's waiting for me, he thought, that's fine. I only endanger those around me anyway. I'm and killer, a monster…I'll never be anything else.

He stood and turned, and saw a tunnel of blackness seem to stretch out before him. He shivered as he stared at it. For the first time in ages, he suddenly felt very small.

Someone once told me Hell wasn't just a place of torment. It's complete separation from God, from everything that's good.

He looked up. Well, Big Guy, he thought, I guess I'm ready. For what it's worth, I'm really sorry for what I've done. I hold myself accountable for every drop of blood on my hands. It was revenge, wasn't it? For Papa…I just wanted to avenge him, but I was so angry, so foolish. Now I know I was really being selfish. I said I enlisted for him…to protect Mama…oh, God…is she still alive? I wish I could see her one last time. No…better for her not to know what I've become.

I became the very creature I wanted to destroy…a mindless war machine. I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it sometimes. I wish I didn't have to kill all those people. I wish I didn't have to kill my comrades, though I don't think I had a choice. I don't know, maybe I did. But I wish…I just wish the little bit of good I'd done…with her…could cancel all that out…but I know that's impossible.

He took a step forward, and knew for certain the darkness ahead was welcoming him with glee. If he still had a body, he would have cringed. Instead, he found himself taking a last look at Alice. He gasped.

Alice was bent over him and looked terrified. He realized they had somehow been moved to inside of an ambulance. How he could be standing up inside of it and still see everything was impossible, but yet he was aware of all of it. He could see his pulse on the heart monitor fluttering wildly. Although he couldn't hear her, he could tell she was screaming at him. He read her lips and knew she was commanding him to fight.

And then…he remembered. The snippet of memory seemed to interlace with what was happening in front of him.

Her fiancée, Lord Lionel was sneering, joyfully pressing the lantern switch. The pain…it was almost unbearable.

"Fight, Corporal, damn it! Come back to me!"

She was standing in front of him, shaking, sword drawn.

I love you.

"Don't you dare die on me, Oland! Fight!"

I love you.

"Corporal, if you don't come back, I'll never forgive you! Do you hear me?!"

I love you.

Alice?

"Damn you, Randel Oland! Stay with me! I need you!"

Alice…needs me? he said to himself. He felt a surge of determination. That's right! My role is…to protect her back! If she still needs me, I can't go yet!

He stepped toward Alice and felt a tidal wave of hands almost overtake him. Terrified at first, he nearly let them pull him into the yawning maw of darkness…then, he got angry.

No! he shouted in his mind. I have to stay! For her, not for me! Big Guy, please…I know you don't bargain, and I know I don't deserve this! But please…please, let me stay just a little longer!

He started fighting back, driving himself forward as surely as he would if on the battlefield with his lantern. Behind him were terrible screams of protest, of prey denied once again. It chilled his very soul. Yet, the more the hands pulled, the angrier he got, until he roared and tried running. It was like slogging through quicksand, but as he approached his body he shrugged off the last few hands and jumped.

The next thing he knew was pain. Pain wracked his body from head to toe.

It was the most wonderful feeling in the world.

I'm alive…thanks, Big Guy.

GAH! Sorry, peeps! Something odd is going on with my home computer and I have been unable to log in for some reason. :( I can't figure out why. The log in link isn't on the homepage, and the upper part looks weird and is all crunched up on the left side. I've cleared the cache, cookies and updated Java. Any suggestions will be highly appreciated. In case I continue to have problems, I also post this story on under the name, Wackyjax.