So yea, sorry about the delay. I know I said I'd get it out fast, and that didn't really happen, but hey I'm here now. I sure hope you enjoy this chapter:)
The next day...
"So Jane, how have things been going since we last spoke? It's been what, two years now?" Dr. Jenny Steins asks Jane, sitting across from us with her legs crossed and her note pad resting in her lap. I look next to me at Jane, waiting to see what her response is.
"I've been good, well except for the past week or so." She says, not elaborating further. Both Dr. Stein and I look at her expectantly. She looks down at her lap, not saying anything further. I sigh before looking back to Dr. Stein.
"Her nightmares are back. There's been three just this week, and it's starting to worry me. It's been years since she's had one, and as far as I can tell, there hasn't been anything that would have triggered them." I tell her, looking back at Jane and resting my hand in her lap. To my relief she grabs my hand and gives it a squeeze, as if to say thank you for speaking when she couldn't. This brings a smile to my face, seeing as we've been sort of fighting since yesterday and the failed attempt at making love. I hope this session with Dr. Stein will help, both for Jane's nightmares, and our marital issue.
"I see, and are they the same nightmares as before?" She asks, directing her question at Jane, who takes a moment before answering.
"No." Is all she says, so I give her a small nudge with my shoulder, wanting her to cooperate and get the help she needs.
"It's always the same though, I walk into an empty house and after hearing a noise, make my way up to my bedroom, finding Maura tied to a chair in front of our bed with her throat slit. I panic and untie her, cradling her to my chest while I weep, and then suddenly things change. I'm suddenly tied naked to our bed, Maura nowhere in site, as Charles Hoyt makes his way into my room. He tells me that Maura's gone and that I'm finally his. I ask him about my kids, wanting to know if he has them or not, and he tells me I don't have any. Once that happens my memories of them start to fade and I realize that I'm all alone and have no reason to go on. The dream ends with him plunging a knife into my abdomen and I wake up screaming, every time." She says, holding on to my hand like a vice. I bring it up to my lips and plant a soft kiss, letting her know that she did good in telling that, and that I'm here for her.
"I see, and these started when exactly?" Dr. Stein asks after a brief silence.
"Um, about a week ago. I think last Sunday was when the first one happened." Jane tells her. Dr. Stein jots this down on her notepad.
"Is there anything that you know of that could possibly have triggered the return of these nightmares?" Dr. Stein asks, but Jane shakes her head no.
"No, that's the thing, there isn't. Things have been pretty normal at work, and when I say normal, I mean for a homicide detective. I haven't gotten myself into any harmful situations lately, so I'm rather confused. All I do know, is that they have come back with a vengeance, and I wake up every time in a cold sweat, screaming, and Maura has to hold me for like ten minutes before I finally calm down. It's wearing on me, and I know it's wearing on her, and I would really like to figure out how to make them go away." Jane says, glancing at me briefly before looking back at the doctor.
"I see. Well, how have things been at home, with the two of you?" She asks next, and I feel Jane grip my hand tightly for a second. Our faces must reflect our anxiety about the question, because Dr. Stein looks at us both curiously. Before she has a chance to ask any questions, Jane starts speaking.
"Things at home are good. Lucas and Bella are growing like weeds, and we actually adopted another little boy named Simon. He's integrated into the family beautifully, and the older kids love him to death. Him and Bella are like best friends, he copies everything that she does, and she loves it. I'd say things are really good." She says, and you can detect the awkward undertone to her words. I know she feels awkward about this, and I really don't see why. Yes, we had a slight argument last night, and I seemed to have hurt her feelings when I told her she tasted starchy, but I never meant to hurt, and I surely don't see acting awkward and ignoring me for the rest of the night as being called for.
"And how are things with you and Maura?" Stein can definitely tell that something is off with us, that's why she just bypassed Jane telling her about the kids, and asked about us directly.
"We've... been better." Jane tells her, looking straight ahead, not making eye contact with me. This fact deeply saddens me, I hate it when we fight, or have some sort of disagreement.
"What do you mean by that?" Stein asks her, and I hear Jane sigh before glancing at me briefly. I decide to tell Dr. Stein what happened last night, since it seems like Jane won't.
"We started to have sex last night, and while I was going down on Jane I told her that she tasted starchy, which hurt her feelings and ended our love session. She hasn't really talked to me since, and this is the first time that's she's initiated physical contact between us." I say, holding up our joined hands. Dr. Stein nods at me and writes something down, before turning her attention back to Jane.
"Jane, do you have anything to add?" She asks her, waiting patiently for her answer.
"I was deeply hurt by Maura's comment, and now in hindsight I can see that I overreacted, but I guess I was just kind of upset about a lot of things, not just the incident during sex."
"And what things were you upset about?" Stein asks next. Jane looks over at me, a somewhat apologetic look on her face, before turning back to Stein to answer her.
"I've been having some issues with the way our marriage works lately, and they just sort of keep growing deep inside. I haven't talked to Maura about them, and I know that I should have, but I have a hard time opening up and admitting that I'm weak and need a change, so I didn't." I look at her shocked, having no idea that she was unhappy in any way.
"Jane, what is it that's upsetting you?" Dr. Stein asks, and I look at Jane expectantly, wanting to know myself.
"Well lately-" Jane starts before she's interrupted.
"To Maura Jane, tell Maura what it is that's been bothering you." She tells her, and Jane turns her head to look at me. My face reflects anticipation, as well as hurt, and I know Jane can see this. She never likes to see me in pain, even if she herself is hurting, and a sympathetic look crosses her face as she takes my other hand in hers and turns more to face me.
"Maur," She takes a brief pause and breathes in deeply, closing her eyes momentarily. "I love you, you know that right?" She says, and I nod my head yes, the feeling of tears slowly starting to form in my eyes, even though I don't want them to be. I can tell that's she's about to say some things that are going to hurt me, that I don't want to hear, but need to be said.
"I don't know, I guess I just feel like when it comes to our relationship, and especially regarding the kids, it's very one sided, favoring your side. When it comes to dinner and groceries, it's always food that you approve of, when we go out places, it's places you want to go. And my biggest problem is our dynamic with the kids. I always have to play the bad guy, telling the kids they can't have something or punish them when they misbehave, because you don't set boundaries. You're too afraid of the kids hating you, that you can't make the decisions a parent needs to make, which pushes it off onto me, and I have to seem like the mean one." I coil back at her words, as if I've been slapped, and she keeps talking, not giving me a chance to say anything.
"And that sucks Maura! I don't want the kids hating me either, but they need to be told what to do, and boundaries need to be set for them. I just wish that instead of putting it all off on me, and making me look like the rude parent who won't let them have anything, that you would back me up once in a while, or better yet, let me be the good guy for once and you handle the punishments." She says, not necessarily sounding angry, but very passionate, a lot of emotion driving her words. That makes it sting all the more.
"I-I'm sorry Jane, I had no idea you felt that way." I say in a soft voice, feeling silent tears start running down my cheeks.
"Maura, how did Jane's words make you feel?" Dr. Stein asks, suddenly reminding me that she's in the room. I look over at her, an almost pleading look on my face, as if she can take away the hurt that Jane's words just inflicted upon me.
"They made me feel horrible. I had no idea she felt that way." I tell her, and she nods before gesturing to Jane, who still has a hold of my hands.
"Tell Jane." She says softly. I move my attention back to Jane, and find her looking at me expectantly, and it would appear that she's bracing for a reaction from me that she won't like. Does she think I'm going to get mad at her for what she said?
"I'm sorry Jane, I really had no idea that you felt that way. I saw everything as going great, and I was glad that you would step in and do for the kids what I couldn't seem to do. If I had known it was hurting you so much, I never would have put that on you." I say, it becoming harder and harder for me to hold back the tears. I try to pull my hands away from Jane, feeling awkward and hurt, but she tightens her grip, not letting me.
"Don't Maur, don't pull away from me. We need to talk about this. I love you, more than life itself, and I want you to hear this so we can work it out and become stronger as a couple." Jane tells me, looking right into my eyes as she does so.
"Maura, do you have concerns in regards to Jane that you would like to express so you can work on them together?" Dr. Stein asks after a brief pause. I have no idea why, but her asking me that makes me want to give a reason, something that will put Jane and I on equal footing. I want her to be at fault here as well, not just me. Before I can stop myself, I blurt something out that I really wish I could take back, but instead I just roll with it.
"I do, you're too sensitive and over-reactive Jane. I can't say anything about our marriage to anyone, when it's just simply wanting to show you off."
"That's when you're telling people you haven't talked to in over twenty years how often we fuck! God Maura really?!" She yells, letting go of my hands and moving hers away.
"Yes, really! What is so wrong about wanting people to know that I have the most amazing, not to mention fucking gorgeous, wife?! That we have three amazingly beautiful children together, oh and yea, we like to fuck!" I yell back, now getting mad myself. Jane looks taken aback by my sudden outburst, and at the fact that I swore, twice.
"This is good ladies, get your frustrations out. Let each other know how you truly feel." Dr. Stein says.
"I'm glad that you want to brag about me, and I feel the same way about you, but there are things you just don't say Maura. I want our private life to stay private, just between you and me. Not my mother, not any random friend or old acquaintance you stumble upon, not our co-workers, no one. Just you and me." Jane says, her tone of voice much more calm now.
"It's not like I've gone around town, finding random people to tell that my wife and I fucked for two hours last night, showing them a picture of you. I said one thing to Abigail, one thing, after she asked a direct question about our sex life. I was not the one to bring that up. And I told you about it, instead of keeping it a secret. I made you aware of what I was saying, I was honest, and you still choose to be mad at me."
"Dammit Maura! I'm not just picking a pointless fight with you. I don't get upset just because. I genuinely don't want you telling people about our business."
"Jane, if I may interrupt." Dr. Stein says, breaking Jane and I's concentration from each other. We both turn to look at her expectantly.
"I'm getting a lot of negativity. Jane has worked up frustrations, Maura has worked up frustrations, now I want to know what you both are going to do about them." She says, leaving it at that. We both slowly turn back to face each other, and after a minute I reach out to take Jane' hands in mine. I sigh deeply before looking her right in the eye.
"I'm sorry for putting you in the position of the primary disciplinary parent for our children. I promise to pick up half of the slack, and let you be the good guy as you said, much more often. I will also strive to keep certain aspects of our relationship out of my conversations with others. I understand that it makes you upset when I make personal matters and topics public, and you're right, they should stay between us." I say, and Jane gives me a small half smile, letting me know that I've made a proper step in making this right again.
"I'm sorry for overreacting on certain things when its not necessary. I admit that I do tend to do that, and there are things that you find innocent that I don't. I promise to take a look at these types of situations from both mine and your perspectives, and talk with you before making any rash decisions or harsh judgements." Jane says in return, and I give her a smile as well. I pull her hands up to my lips to give her knuckles a small kiss each.
"I love you Maur, so much, and I'm sorry for my behavior since yesterday." She says lovingly, and I lean in to kiss her lips.
"I love you too Jane." I say back with a smile. Her mouth opens as she's about to respond, when her phone starts ringing. She gives me an apologetic look before reaching to her hip to grab the device, bringing it out so she can shut it off. However, when she glances at the name on her screen, her eyebrows scrunch up and she gives me a brief quizzical glance before answering it.
"Hello?" She says, waiting while the person on the other end speaks. Her face softens as she listens, and then turns to worry, in turn making me worry as well.
"Okay, we'll be right there." She says before hanging up her phone. She turns her attention to Dr. Stein and starts talking. "We have to go, I'm sorry. We'll reschedule so we can finish this." Now I'm really confused and worried, and I grab Jane's arm as she gets up from couch, gaining her attention.
"Jane, what's going on?"
"That was Lucas' school, apparently he's in the principles office with a split lip and we need to go pick him up." She says, and instantly I go into worried mother mode, getting up from the couch quickly. I look over to Dr. Stein, an apologetic look on my face, wanting to let her know how sorry I am for this coming up and interrupting our session. She doesn't let me get my apology out though before speaking herself.
"Go, I understand. Give me a call later to reschedule." She says.
"We will, thank you." Jane tells her, taking my hand and leading me out of her office and towards the exit.
"What happened Jane?" I ask as we approach the Tahoe. Jane walks over to the passenger side with me and holds my door open, helping me into the vehicle before shutting it and going around to the drivers side. She gets in quickly and starts up the engine.
"I don't know, they wouldn't say, just that we needed to get to the school as soon as possible." She says, taking off at a more than legal speed towards our son's school. We get there in record time, on account of Jane's speeding, and head into the building hand-in-hand and straight to the principles office. Lucas is sitting on a chair in the corner, an ice pack in his hand, which he is holding up to his lip. I rush straight over to him and kneel down level with him.
"Baby, are you okay?" I ask, grabbing his head and feeling around for any further injury. Satisfied that I find none, I slowly grab the ice pack from him and move it away from his lip, wanting to inspect the damage. He has a small split across the left top side of his bottom lip, and it's slightly swollen, but nothing that requires stitches, and should heal fairly quickly.
"I'm sorry mommy." He says, tears starting to form in his eyes, and I instantly reach my arms out to wrap around him, wanting to comfort my sweet boy. I look up to Jane as I hold him, and she's staring down at us with sympathy in her eyes. The principle is standing behind her, on the other side of his desk, watching us curiously. Jane follows my gaze and turns around to face him.
"What happened?" She asks, getting straight to the point. The principle sighs and heads around his desk towards the door, shutting it, and heading back to his desk. He sits down in his chair and instructs for Jane to do the same. She ignores him, instead folding her arms and glaring down at him. A momentary look of fear crosses his face, before it's gone and he straightens his shoulder's . I kiss the top of Lucas' head and guide him to move with me, as I take us over to the chair so we can sit. I want Jane to follow my lead, and thankfully she does once Luke and I are seated.
"Your son got into a fight with a fellow student earlier today. Lucas came out with a split lip as you can see, but the other boy got it far worse. He has a black eye, a bloody nose and a scrapped knee. Mr. Garrison, your son's teacher, had to physically pull Lucas off of the boy in order to break up the fight. I do not condone this sort of behavior, and I want to inform you that Lucas has been suspended for a week." He says, his gaze moving from Jane to me and back several times.
"Excuse me? What makes you think you can suspend my son?" Jane asks, anger clear in her tone.
"He started a fight miss Rizzoli, he-"
"It's Mrs. Rizzoli-Isles, and how do you know he started it?" Jane cuts him off, her tone raising. The principle, Mr. Gowdy as I now notice his name plaque says, falters momentarily, clearly affected by Jane's tone.
"Mr. Garrison informed me that he watched your son hit the other student in the nose before tackling him to the ground. He ran up and had to pull your son off to break up the fight." Lucas suddenly moves forward in my lap, moving the ice pack away from his mouth. "He started it!" He yells at Mr. Gowdy.
"What do you mean baby?" I ask him sweetly, and he turns to look at me with tears in his eyes. "Nathan kept teasing me all day, throwing paper at me and kicking my chair, but I ignored him like mama told me to do, but that made him mad. He started talking about you and mama, saying you were stupid lesbians and that I was a bastard kid. I couldn't take it no more so I punched him in the nose, just like mama taught me." He says, looking from me to Jane and back. I look at him shocked for a moment, clearly not expecting those words to come out of his mouth.
"So you think it's appropriate to teach your children how to fight miss Rizzoli?" Mr. Gowdy suddenly asks Jane, folding his arms and looking at her with what I can only describe as disgust. Jane scoffs next to me, not intimidated by him in the slightest bit.
"I'm glad I taught him how to defend himself. Obviously this Nathan character pushed him too far, and got what he deserved." Jane says to him, and Mr. Gowdy's eyes go wide as he moves back in his seat, shocked by Jane's words.
"Excuse me!" He exclaims, but Jane doesn't give him a chance to continue.
"What kind of place are you running where you allow children to say such horrible things to one another? It's obviously a reflection upon bad parenting in their households, but you should at least be making an effort to teach your students about equality and respect, not judging people who may be different from them." She says to him. I pull Lucas tighter into me, and kiss the top of his head, wanting to let him know that he isn't in trouble.
"Well maybe you should find a school that is better suited for your life choice, it might be more of what you're looking for." He says with a snarky, condescending tone, which was a bad idea on his part.
"You did not just say that." She says, standing up and leaning towards him.
"Miss Isles, can you please control her." He says, looking past Jane at me, and I can tell that he's trying to remain calm, but the fact that Jane is practically standing over him, pissed beyond belief, is scaring him.
"It's Mrs. Rizzoli-Isles, you ignorant asshole! And I think I will take your advice and find a different school. I don't want my son around other ignorant asshole's like yourself." She says, taking my hand once more and leading us out of the office quickly. We must look like quite the group as we storm out of the school, heads turning to watch us go, shocked expressions on their faces. We get out to the parking lot in silence, tensions running high off of my wife.
"Mommy, my backpack!" Luke cries out once we get to the car, holding tighter to my hand instead of getting inside.
"Where is it bud?" Jane asks him. He looks up at her with desperation on his face, clearly upset that we left his backpack inside of the school.
"My classroom." He says, and she moves to head back into the school, so I call out to her.
"Jane, let me go get it." I say, and she pauses before nodding her head, knowing that I would be the better option to head back inside, as I wouldn't blow up in someone's face. She takes Lucas' hand from mine, and I lean down towards him to give him a kiss on the cheek, before heading quickly back into the school to retrieve his backpack.
"Mommy!" Simon cries out as soon as he sees us coming in the front door. He takes off running towards me, and I barely have time to crouch down and open my arms. I have to move my face to the side in order to avoid our heads smacking, his enthusiasm to see me being his only thought.
"Hey honey." I say to him, wrapping him tightly in my arms and kissing the top of his head. I look up to see Angela walking towards us, a concerned look on her face as she spots Lucas, who still has the ice pack on his lip.
"What happened here?" She asks, pointing to him before taking the pack from him to expose his lip.
"He got in a fight at school, which resulted him getting a busted lip. We were called from our session to go get him, and got into an argument with the principle." Jane tells her.
"What sort of argument?" Angela asks as she takes Lucas into her arms for a loving hug.
"The priniciple was an ignorant as-"
"Jane!" I call out to her, not wanting my children to hear her swear.
"Jerk, who was basically saying that because Maur and I are together, that our son would be better off in a school more fitted to our livestyle. He wanted to blame Luke for the whole thing, even though the kid said some pretty awful things about us and him, which eventually pushed him to his breaking point. And I don't blame him." She says, looking down at our son, grabbing his shoulders to gain his attention.
"Hey kiddo, you did the right thing. Not necessarily the fighting part, but sticking up for your family, and trying to ignore him for the majority of the day. I'm proud of you buddy, and it makes me happy that you listened to what I said and taught you." She says, and he smiles at her. Simon gets bored of our talking, and leaves my embrace to scamper off to go play. I stand back up and walk over to Lucas.
"Come on honey, lets get your lip cleaned up properly." I say, guiding him towards the bathroom just off of the kitchen. "Can you hop up onto the counter for me bud?" I ask him, and he nods before doing just that. I open the cupboard and grab out a clean rag, get it wet with cold water, and move to stand in front of my son.
"I'll be as gentle as I can, but I need to get the remaining blood off okay honey?" I say to him, and he nods his head. I gently go about removing the blood, and once it's clean I confirm that his cut doesn't need any stitches.
"Okay buddy, you're all set." I say, and he looks up at me curiously. "Mom, whats a lesbian?" He asks, genuinely wanting to know what that word means. I stare at him for a moment, not really sure how to explain this to him. As far as he knows, having two mothers is completely normal, and I've known since he was born, that one day he would learn how the world is not so understanding when it comes to couples like his mother and I. I also feared about other children bullying him and his siblings regarding the same thing. It breaks my heart to know that he got into a fight because I fell in love with a woman, and I hope that he won't grow up to resent Jane and I for it.
"Um, it's a woman who loves other women, and not men." I say, and he looks at me confused. "They don't like men?" He asks next.
"No, they like men, they just don't want to kiss and hug them." I tell him, not knowing what else to say.
"Are you and mama lesbians?"
"Yes baby, yes we are." I look at him, anticipating what his next words will be.
"But you hug uncle Frost and Frankie." He says, a look of deep confusion still etched on his face.
"Yes, but you know how uncle Frankie and aunt Sarah kiss each other?" I ask, and he nods his head yes.
"Well mama and I like to kiss each other, not boys." I say, and his brows scrunch up for a moment while he thinks over my words.
"So you and mama have sex with girls, not boys?" He asks, and my eyes go wide at the shock that befalls me at his question. Where did he learn that from?
"Baby, how do you know that word?"
"Nathan and Sam from school keep talking about their mom and dad. Nathan said that he saw his dad having sex with his mom, and she was screaming, and when he walked in to see if she was okay, they got all upset at him. His dad told him later that sex is something parents do when they love each other. You and mama love each other, so do you have sex?" He asks, causing me to physically cringe every time he says the word sex. I hate the way it sounds coming out of my eight-year-old's mouth.
"Hey bud, how's the lip?" Jane asks, suddenly appearing in the doorway. I sigh in relief, her appearance providing the perfect distraction so I don't have to answer Luke's question. Jane gives me a curious look, my face clearly showing my unease and relief, and I give her a look as if to say I'll tell you later." She nods her head in understanding before turning her attention back to our son.
"I'm good mama." He says happily to her with a small smile. "Good, I'm glad bud." She says, reaching out to ruffle his hair.
"Why don't you go out into the living room and talk to your Nona? She really wants to see you." She says to him, and he nods quickly before hopping down and heading out the door. My gaze follows him as he goes, and once he disappears I turn my attention back to Jane. She smiles at me and leans in for a quick kiss, taking my hand after it breaks, and leading me out the door.
"Hey Ma, can you keep an eye on the kids for a bit? Maura and I are gonna go upstairs." She says to her mother as we make our way through the living room. Angela looks up briefly, smiling at us. "Of course baby." She says before turning her attention back to Simon, who's she coloring a picture with.
"Thanks ma!" Jane calls over her shoulder as she leads me up the stairs. I follow behind quietly as we make our way down the hall towards our bedroom. She leads me through the door, and once we've passed into our room, she spins around and pins me against the door with slight force. Her lips immediately crash onto mine, molding her body flush against me. I don't respond to the kiss right away, her sudden actions shocking me, but soon I wrap my arms around her neck and begin to kiss back with fervor. She moans against my lips when I do, and I feel her body push just that little bit tighter against me. She grabs my wrists and pulls my arms over my head, abandoning my lips to start biting my neck.
"Jane." I say, the small bit of coherence left in my brain telling me that we can't do this, that we need to stop, even though it feels so good. I find myself moaning as she starts nibbling on that sweet spot on my neck behind my ear.
"Oh Jane!" I moan out.
"That's right baby, Jane." She husks into my ear before she starts nibbling on the lobe. I involuntarily thrust my hips into her, and attempt to pull my hand down so I can wrap it around her neck. Her grip tightens however, preventing me from moving my hand. I groan out in frustration at not being able to tangle my fingers in her luscious hair. She knows how much I love to do that, and she's purposely frustrating me.
Her lips are suddenly back on mine, crushingly so, and she lets go of my hands. I wrap them around her neck at the same time as she reaches down and cups my ass, lifting me up off of the ground. I squeal out at the shock of suddenly being lifted, and my grip tightens around her neck.
"Jane, wait!" I manage to cry out right before she tosses me onto our bed.
"What?" She growls as she crawls towards me, instantly going for the buttons on my shirt.
"We can't do this, the kids are just downstairs, with your mother." I say to her, but she completely ignores me. She continues to undo the buttons on my blouse, so I reach up and grab her hands.
"Stop Jane." I warn, but she still ignores me, instead pushing my hand away so she can continue her task.
"Sto-" I attempt to say, but she cuts me off by smashing her lips to mine once more. As her tongue invades my mouth, I find my resolve quickly dwindling. And when she finally gets my shirt unbuttoned, and her hand comes into contact with my bare skin, I thrust my hips up once more and wrap my arms securely around her.
She makes quick work of ridding me of the rest of my clothes, and I soon find myself lying naked and open under my wife. Her eyes are almost pitch black, and she has a predatory look on her face, one that I know all too well. I know based on that look that she is about to ravish me, make me almost forget my name, and I'm suddenly afraid that I won't be able to control myself, effectively alerting the whole house to what's happening.
Jane suddenly makes her move, but instead of heading for my lips like I anticipated, she goes right for my breasts, taking the left nipple in her mouth while her hand goes to the other to pull and squeeze. I moan out as her warm wet mouth closes around the sensitive nub, and when she bites down I cry out her name. Her mouth pulls off my nipple with a soft 'pop', as she moves her head up to look at me.
"Ssshh." She says before getting back to her task at hand. She switches her mouth the the right nipple, and her hand moves down my body instead of to the other breast. I move my hands to the front of Jane's shirt, wanting to feel her soft skin against mine, but right as I come into contact with the material, Jane's hand comes down and grabs my wrist, pulling my hand away. I can feel her other hand creeping it's way down my torso, about to make contact, but when I attempt to unbutton her shirt with my free hand, hers abandons its quest to grab that wrist as well.
She bites down on my lip, almost as if in warning, telling me that I need to keep my hands where they are. She slowly lets go and begins again her quest down to my aching core, but as I move my hands to her shirt, she stops again and grabs both wrists.
"No." She husks at me, pulling away from our kiss to look at me in warning. My chest is rising and falling as I breath heavily, and I'm sure my chest is rather flushed from my arousal. Jane's eyes leave mine and trail around my chest area, no doubt admiring my assets.
"God, you are so fucking beautiful." She husks right before letting my hand go and thrusting three fingers deep inside of me. I cry out in pleasure at suddenly being filled, and she wastes no time in thrusting in and out of me quickly. Her mouth latches back onto my breast and she sucks with a new fervor as she continues to thrust.
"Oh god, Jane!" I cry out as her other hand comes down to join the party, rubbing fast hard circles around my clit.
"Baby, baby, ugh! Yes! Yes!" I cry out as my orgasm quickly washes over me. I cum extremely hard, a mix between pain and pleasure, and Jane's mouth quickly latches onto mine to stifle my screams. She pulls out of me quickly and flips me over, thrusting back into me from behind.
"Jaaaaneeeeee!" I scream out at the top of my lungs, an even more powerful orgasm slamming into me, and my vision suddenly goes black.
I wake to find myself alone in my bed, the covers draped over me. I look outside and find the sky to be dimmer, and when my eyes land on the clock next to me, I find that I've been asleep for several hours. I move to get out of bed, and find that I'm very sore down in my womanhood. I wince in pain, but smile at the memory of the two intense orgasms Jane gave me. I make quick work of getting out of bed and throwing on some comfy clothes, which consist of my yoga pants and Jane's BPD hoodie. I check myself in the bathroom to make sure I look okay before heading out into the hallway in search of my family. As I walk towards Lucas' room, I hear two small voices coming from inside. As I approach and stand in the doorway I see Lucas sitting on his bed with Bella sitting right next to him. She's staring at his lip, that I can see is slightly swollen with a small bruise around it.
"Does it hurts?" Bella asks him softly, her tone full of concern.
"Not too bad." He says to her, and I can tell he's trying to be tough.
"Why he hits you?" She asks next, her little eyes alight with curiosity.
"He was being mean about me and moms, and so I hit him." He tells her in response.
"Wow!" She says, her tone that of astonishment. "That's cools." Lucas is about to respond when he finally notices me standing in the doorway, smiling up at me immediately.
"Hey mom." He says to me.
"Mommy!" Bella cries as she too notices me, instantly getting off of the bed and rushing over to me. I crouch down and open my arms for her, scooping her up once she's in them.
"Hi baby!" I say to her, kissing her on the forehead as I stand back up.
"Hi mommie!" She says sweetly as she begins to play with my hair. I make my way slowly over to Lucas and sit down next to him on his bed.
"How are you doing sweetheart?" I ask him, inspecting his lip at a glance.
"I'm good mom." He says casually with a brief shrug. I smile down at him and run my hand through his hair softly. It stays quiet for a moment while I just sit with my children, Bella still playing with my hair.
"Mom, am I going to have to switch schools?" Lucas suddenly asks, breaking the silence. He has a concerned look on his face as he glances up at me through his lashes. I look back down at him, not quite sure what to say to him. I open my mouth to respond, but no words come out.
"I didn't mean to fight with him mom, I swear. He was just being so rude and I couldn't take it anymore." He says, his voice getting more desperate as he speaks. My motherly instincts kick in, wanting my little cub to not be upset.
"Oh honey, I know. Your mama and I aren't mad. Please don't be upset okay?" I say to him, brushing his cheek with my hand. He gives me a small half smile and nods his head.
"As for the school, I need to talk to your mama before we make any decisions okay?" I say to him, and he nods his head once more.
"Speaking of your mama, where did she get off to?" I ask my children, and Bella instantly points out the door.
"Downstairs mommie!" She says in excitement, breaking the tension in the room with her playfulness.
"Alright, shall we go find her?" I ask, looking expectantly at them both. Lucas nods his head, and Bella starts hopping up and down in my arms.
"Yay, mama!" She calls out, and both Lucas and I chuckle as we get up and make our way out of the room to go find Jane. We find her in the living room, sitting on the couch with Simon curled up on her lap while they watch sports highlights. Upon further inspection I find that Simon is asleep, which makes more sense because I can't imagine he would want to watch the sports highlights.
"Hey baby, hey guys!" Jane calls out to us as we come around into her view. Lucas walks over and sits down on her other side and Bella reaches out for her mama, who gladly takes her into her arms.
"Hey princess!" She says to her, which causes Bella to giggle. I make my way over to the chair next to the couch and sit down, turning my body to face my family. Jane looks over at me and gives me a knowing smirk, and I feel myself blush, memories of our love making earlier flashing through my mind. It was rather wonderful, but I can't help but worry because Jane wouldn't let me touch her. She was very dominant, taking me in every sense of the word, and I loved it, but I'm afraid she might be unwilling to allow me to touch her now. Once the kids go to bed I'll have to talk to her, about several things actually.
We stay like this for a couple hours, Jane having changed the channel to something more kid friendly, and we sit together as a family and watch a cartoon about a very smart boy with a big bubble-like robot. It's rather cute, and I find myself enjoying the time watching it with my children. We end up ordering a pizza, much to my dismay, and the kids munch away on their unhealthy dinner. Soon all three sets of eyes are closed, the kids fast asleep. Jane and I gather them up and take them upstairs to bed. After tucking them all in, and giving goodnight kisses, I head back downstairs to make myself a cup of tea. Jane joins me in the kitchen a few minutes later, sitting down at the island while I pour myself a cup.
"Would you like one?" I ask her, and she nods her head yes. I grab another cup and pour her some as well. She stays silent while I do so, speaking only after I hand her her cup.
"Thanks. So what do we do about Lucas' school?" She asks, taking a tentative sip of her hot beverage. I set my cup down and lean more against the counter, ready to have a serious conversation with my wife.
"I don't know. What do you think is the best course of action?" I ask her.
"Well I know I don't want him there if those are the kinds of attitudes surrounding him." She says back, her forehead scrunching up in frustration.
"I know honey, neither do I, but I'm not so sure we'll have much luck anywhere else. As much as we hate it, our lifestyle is frowned upon by many people, and we have no way of shielding our children from them all. We just have to make sure we teach them to be kind and accepting, nonjudgmental, and hope they continue on with that once they're grown." I say, trying to be rational.
"That's crap Maura! I don't accept that we just have to let our kids hear horrible shit like that! You and I are way better parents than so many out there, it's not even funny. Just because we're both women should have nothing to do with it. I don't want stuck-up little bratty kids like that Nathan character to fill my son's ear with crap. He shouldn't have to hear that his mother's are disgusting, and that he's a bastard child because he doesn't have a dad." She snaps, not so much at me, but just in general. I know she's passionate about this, and I completely agree with her, but the world doesn't always work the way we want it to.
"I know Jane, I'm with you on all of that. We are great parents, and our kids know that. We just have to be there for them, and show them that even if people say hurtful, rude, things, that we'll always be here to support and love them no matter what." I say, reaching out to take her hand, knowing that she needs the physical touch to calm her.
"It's not fair Maur." She says after a moment, her tone more defeated than angry. I immediately let go of her hand and make my way around the counter, taking her in my arms. She rests her head against my chest and wraps her arms around me tightly.
"I know baby, I know. We definitely have it harder than most couples because we're both women, but I wouldn't change it for anything. I love you, wholeheartedly, and I'm glad it's you by my side raising our three magnificent children." I say, and I feel her squeeze me tighter.
"I love you too." I hear mumbled against my chest, and I chuckle lightly at her not wanting to come out from my chest. It really is one of her favorite places to be. I stroke her hair and smile at her once she reemerges.
"Hello beautiful." I say sweetly, and she smiles in return before leaning in to give me a kiss.
"We can see about different schools for him, but I don't want to keep him out for too long." I say to her after the kiss breaks.
"I'm worried about moving him too, I know he's made friends and he's comfortable there." I say, wanting to bring that to Jane's attention. I know how hard it can be on children, making them move from one environment to the other, forcing them to leave their friends and make new ones. I personally don't know what that's like, only because I didn't have friends growing up. I do however know how it feels to be alone, and feel like an outcast. I don't want my children to have to go through the same things I did.
"Well what do we do about his school then? That principle seemed pretty homophobic, I highly doubt he'll be willing to do any sort of awareness towards gay discrimination." Jane says, looking up at me expectantly. I resume the gentle combing of my fingers through her hair, and I can see her eyes flutter at the pleasure it brings her.
"I don't know Jane. I believe you are right in your assumption about him and his phobia. I don't think we need to raise awareness per say though, I just want them to put a stop to bullying, of any kind." I say in response.
"Well of course, but I find it very hard to believe that that asshole principle will do anything about it."
"Jane, language!" I scold her, and she just rolls her eyes.
"How about I go talk to Mr. Gowdy tomorrow and see what I can't work out with him. If he really is unwilling to help, or acknowledge that any action needs to be taken, then we will start our hunt for a new school." I suggest, and she nods her head.
"Yea, okay that sounds fair. Don't let him give you any crap though alright?" She says, looking at me expectantly.
"I won't honey, I promise." I say, sealing it with a kiss. Jane smiles before moving to walk away. I grab her hand and pull her back towards me, latching our lips together once more. She smiles against my lips and kisses me back. It starts to get heated as I push my tongue past her lips and into her warm wet mouth, but before it can get any steamier she pulls away.
"What's wrong?" I ask, giving her a confused look.
"It's nothing, I just think that we should head up and get ready for bed." She says, once again attempting to head away from me. I grab her once more, pulling her back to me, but instead of kissing her I wrap my arms securely around her waist and look right into her eyes.
"What's wrong baby? Why won't you let me kiss you more? Does this have something to do with why you wouldn't let me touch you earlier?" I ask, following her eyes as her gaze moves around the house. I wait patiently for her to look back at me and answer my question. It only takes her a moment to respond.
"Maybe." She says softly, and I have to strain my ears to hear her.
"What?" I ask, wanting her to speak up and elaborate.
"Okay fine, I admit I am a little hesitant for you to touch me. I guess my delicate ego was bruised yesterday by your comment, however innocent it was, and I think it might take me some time to let you reciprocate." She says, and I give her a sympathetic smile. I take her hands into mine and wait for her to give me her undivided attention. When she does I give her a genuine loving smile before speaking.
"Honey, I really am sorry for what I said, and I in no way meant that I didn't enjoy what I was doing. I absolutely love going down on you, and your taste is one of my most favorite flavors." I say, and take joy as I see a crimson blush overtake my wife's face. I give her a mischievous smile, and pull her closer to me, leaning my head up so my mouth is close to her ear.
"Come upstairs with me, and I'll show you just how much I enjoy your taste." I whisper huskily into her ear, and she shivers against me. I take this as a positive sign, standing and leading her upstairs into our bedroom. I have her clothes off in record time, and spend the next several hours worshiping my wife's glorious body, making sure she forgets all about what happened last night. I want to reassure her of how much I love making love to her, and I have to say that I think I do a pretty good job.