He reluctantly allowed himself be pushed away from Hermione, his eyes locked on the now closed door. His entire body felt heavy, every nerve on edge.
"Oh my goodness!" A familiar head of red hair rushed towards him as he entered the kitchen, Tonks maintaining a grip on his forearm as Molly came towards them. Harry felt his eyes shoot upwards at the sound and his body instinctively stiffened. The room was full of people, all standing up as he entered the room. Ginny and Draco looked at him with wide eyes.
"Blimey, Harry." Ron stepped forwards, drawing his green eyes to his other best friend. Ron's eyes narrowed in concern, "where's Hermione?"
"She's been poisoned." Tonks replied, attempted to lead Harry to a chair. He refused to sit. He felt like he was swimming under water. His body hurt. His heart ached and yet his eyes would not close. He wanted to yell and scream but his body wouldn't allow it. "She's being treated now." McGonagall made an odd noise at the information, her usually stern face carrying signs of dread. Harry couldn't bear to look anyone in the eye.
"She'll be ok though, right?" Ron demanded, eyes flashing.
Harry felt Tonks glance at him, dark eyes lined with worry. "We don't know yet, Ron." She squeezed Harry's arm, bringing his attention to her. "You're hurt, Harry."
"I'm fine." His voice was not familiar to his ears and he almost flinched away from it.
Tonks tssked, "you are not. You keep twitching."
"I should be with Hermione." He ignored her comment, belatedly realising she was right. He was twitching. His body involuntarily shuddering every few moments, the remnants from his encounter with Voldemort. He felt his body shudder again and he gripped Tonks' hand in response. His body awash with a sick sensation. His scar prickled uncomfortably.
"Harry?" Tonks' voice was low, sensing a shift.
"I can feel him." Harry let go of her hand, instead bringing it up to rest on his scar. He could feel dried blood there from earlier. He could feel him press against his mind, the force behind it staggering.
"Get out." His voice was low, almost pleading.
His knees buckled slightly under the pressure as he felt a wave of empty darkness enter him. He felt an irrational anger too. One that he knew wasn't entirely his own.
He heard a cruel laugh in response, his body crumbling under its weight. He sensed Tonks approach him, kneeling down. He felt him push again, seeking entrance to his mind. His eyes flashing angrily at the intrusion. He almost let himself be drawn in by the darkness; by the hatred when Hermione's eyes flashed before him again. Her voice. He pushed again, holding that image. Holding that sound. That scent. He allowed everything about her to consume him. It was that which pushed him away, repelled in every way.
He let out a harsh breath, his mind clearing of his influence.
"Harry?" Ron's voice was tentative, unsure. Harry opened his eyes, suddenly realising he was on the floor. Tonks and Ron took up space on either side of him, eyes wide and full of worry.
"I'm… I'm fine." His voice was weak.
"You were convulsing." Ron stated matter of factly, blue eyes piercing, "and your scar was bleeding."
"Again?" Harry checked himself, his hands coming away sticky with fresh blood. He allowed Ron and Tonks to lift him up, holding on to him as he took up the nearest chair. "Hermione…" He went to stand when a wave of dizziness overcame him.
"Bloody hell." Ron steadied the swaying. "Sit down."
"Just breathe, Harry." Tonks moved in front of him, kneeling to his level. "Let me fix you up first."
Harry nodded, eyes troubled. Tonks sent him a thankful look, "I'll need to get a potion for you." She made to stand up but found Harry gripping her arm.
"Not a sleeping draught. I need to be awake." He was insistent.
Tonks nodded, understanding in her gaze. "Not a sleeping draught. Just something for the pain."
He stared at the old wooden door, eyes not seeing anything at all. He lent against it softly, his forehead resting on the rough surface. He felt his eyes well with tears, his vision blurring. He slid down the door slowly, moving to lean his back on it. He pulled his knees up, hugging them to his chest. He had left the kitchen following Tonks making sure he was ok, wanting to be closer to Hermione and to also escape the curious gazes that followed him. He frowned, his mind whirling with the events of the night. It all blurred together. Jumbled. Disorganised. It was a miracle they'd all escaped alive, albeit with some scrapes. The 5 that entered, making it out, so too a number of prisoner's. He was in the midst of attempting to process and make sense of it all when he heard footsteps approach. Ron sat beside him without a word, his long gangly legs stretched out before him.
"Hermione?"
"They don't know yet." Harry couldn't shake the image of her on the bed. Bloodied. Hurt.
Ron nodded once, his expression pained. "You sure you're ok, Harry?"
"I'm fine." His voice was croaky. He looked at his bloodied hands again, hastily wiping them on his trousers in a useless attempt. "I'm fine, Ron." His mind was void of anything else but his own pain and hurt.
He could tell Ron wanted to offer a reply and was grateful when he didn't, instead allowing the silence to envelope them.
"It was Seamus." Harry said suddenly, his voice filling the empty corridor.
Ron raised an eyebrow in confusion, "what about Seamus?"
"He's the traitor." He was still struggling to process the information. "He's working with Voldemort. Has been all year."
"No..." Ron straightened his posture, his body tensing at the revelation. "Why?"
Harry shrugged, suddenly feeling very tired. "No fucking idea."
"The bastard." Ron's eyes flashed angrily, that familiar Weasley temper rearing its head. "Smarmy git." He was about continue in his remark when the door they'd been leaning on creaked open. Harry grimacing in pain as he clambered to his feet, Ron beside him. His heart hammered in his chest as both of them waited for the healer to speak.
Madam Pomfrey looked exhausted, dark circles lining her eyes.
"We were able to extract all the poison." She started.
"She's going to be ok?" Harry asked, his voice tinged with desperation.
A nod and Harry had never felt such relief in his entire life. His shoulder's slumped and he almost collapsed into Ron, the latter holding onto him tightly.
"Her body has been through a lot." She continued, "she'll need time to recover and rest. She lost a lot of blood."
Harry nodded. "May we…?" He indicated toward the door, itching to see her for himself.
The nurse nodded, her eyes softening as she looked at the duo. "Of course."
They entered the room slowly, their feet quiet on the floorboards as they approached her. Snape and Dumbledore lingered by the bed where she rested. Harry was by her side in a second.
"What was it?"
"We believe it was Potion No.86." Snape answered. "Made with syrup of hellebore and powdered moonstone. Very rare. And highly poisonous."
Harry swallowed a large lump in his throat. "She'll be ok?" He asked the question again as he raised his eyes.
Snape met his gaze, "she'll be ok. She needs to rest." He shared a glance with Dumbledore, "and you Potter. You need to rest. Your body has been through a lot."
"Tonks gave me something." Harry replied, aware suddenly that Snape had witnessed him being tortured. He was also acutely aware that his body continued to twitch, infrequently now. But noticeable.
Snape nodded, eyes assessing him as Harry turned to Hermione. He gripped her hand in his, her hand hot to his touch. "I'm right here, 'Mione." He took no mind of the people in the room, honing in on Hermione. "I'm right here."
He didn't know how long he sat there for. Ron right next to him. A plate of food untouched beside him.
"Harry… you need to rest." Tonks lingered behind him, sharing a concerned glance with Ron.
He shook his head slightly, the motion hurting him. "I'm listening."
"Listening to what, Harry?" Tonks knelt beside him.
He didn't tear his gaze away from her chest. The steady rise and fall a comfort. A reminder that she was still alive.
"Her breathing." He replied softly.
"Oh, Harry." Tonks' heart ached for the raven haired wizard. He felt her grip him by the shoulders as she dropped a kiss to the crown of his head. He felt her move above him, shifting to retrieve the full plate of food before exiting the room.
Ron had just left, citing the need to stretch his legs and freshen up. Harry could only offer a slight nod of acknowledgement as he departed, eyes fixated on the girl lying in bed. He noted the curve of her lips, the arch of her nose, the faint freckles that dotted her cheeks. He itched to touch her, itched to climb in with her and hold her to him. To be close. Instead he took her hand in his, absently tracing circles. His head rested on the side of the bed, his hand still holding hers. He was hunched forward, his eyes red rimmed and tired. When he felt the bed shift, his raised his head.
Hermione groaned slightly, her eyes fluttering open blearily as she focused her gaze on him.
Her eyes. Eyes he was afraid were closed forever gazed at him. He felt his own well with more tears, not even attempting to hide it. He shifted closer to her.
"There she is…" Harry sent her a soft smile, heart warming as she looked at him. Tears ran down his face unchecked.
She coughed lightly, attempting to clear her throat. "Harry…"
"Hi." His voice was soft in the room, "how are you feeling?"
She closed her eyes tired before re-opening them slowly. "Sore." She sighed, her face grimacing, "is everyone ok?"
Harry nodded, "they will be."
"How long have I been out?"
"2 days. In and out." Harry answered quietly.
Hermione nodded before eying him softly. "You're still in the same clothes."
"I am." He shifted to the table to retrieve her a glass of water. "Here," he helped her down the glass. "You had me scared for a moment there, Granger." He reprimanded gently as he placed the glass beside her.
"Harry Potter never gets scared." Hermione whispered, her own eyes filling with tears.
"He does." Harry leaned his forehead against hers. "When it comes to you, he does."
Hermione let out a stifled sob, "I'm sorry."
He shook his head, "you shouldn't be apologising." He wiped away her tears as they continued to stream down her face. She fixed her eyes on him, the events of the night coming back to her slowly. Her eyes widened as realisation dawned on her.
"You..." He saw tears start to well in her eyes again, "Harry he was hurting you."
Harry nodded, "I'm ok, Hermione."
"I couldn't help you..." The tears continued to fall from her eyes.
Harry brushed a kiss against her forehead. "The power he knows not." He quoted the Prophecy. "You're my power, you know that, right?"
"Harry..."
"My strength." He pressed a kiss to her cheek and he tasted the saltiness of her tears. She let out a slight whimper, tears falling freely now. Harry shifted ever closer, his forehead resting against hers gently. "You saved me, Hermione."
He stood in the shower until the water ran clear, scrubbing his skin until it was tinged red. Hermione had basically pushed him out the door following Pomfrey coming to check how she was going.
He wiped at the mirror as he stepped out of the shower and was startled by his own reflection. He looked awful. There were dark circles under his eyes, one of them nursing a very swollen and very purple bruise. His skin looked drawn, taut again his cheekbones. He frowned, remembering that his last meal had been at Hogwarts.
As he exited the room, he'd only taken a steps before he ran into another figure, their blonde hair oddly dishevelled.
"I heard Hermione woke up..." Draco started.
"Yeah. She's still tired and sore. To be expected I guess. But she's talking. Pomfrey is in with her now."
"That's good." Draco nodded.
Harry watched him quietly, something seemed off with him. "You ok, Draco?"
"I don't know what happened." He blurted out, "to my mother, I mean."
"Oh."
"I was wondering if you saw her... if you knew."
Harry felt his chest tighten. "I saw her." She was in the same room where he'd been tortured by Voldemort.
"Did she get out?"
"I don't know, Draco." Harry felt guilt flood him. "I didn't see." He shook his head, memories coming back to him. "It all happened so quickly... I'm sorry, Draco."
Draco nodded, a pained expression lining his face. He forced a smile onto his face, "It's ok, Harry. I didn't think... I just.. thought I'd check."
"I'm sorry about the house, too." He glanced downwards, "that was your home."
Draco let out a light snort, "hardly. A hunk of stone." Grey eyes met green as Draco continued, "It was never my home. Hogwarts is."
"Funny how it was that affect on people." Harry smiled slightly, "I always felt the same." He paused briefly, "you're ok here aren't you?"
Draco raised an eyebrow, "practically a guest of honor."
"That bad?" Harry sighed.
"I'm tolerated..." Draco shrugged his shoulders. "And considering that greeting a few nights ago. Quite an improvement."
Harry let out a light laugh, "practically family."
"Do you ever get used to the... noise?" Draco asked, causing Harry to laugh.
"I want to say yes..."
"But?"
"I'd be lying."
Draco laughed, clapping Harry on the shoulder as they arrived at Hermione's door. "I'm glad you're ok, Harry. Hermione too." He removed his hand, "I've grown... accustomed to you."
"Moving words if I've ever heard them." Harry rolled his eyes, as Draco grinned.
As he entered the room he noted she was propped up on a pillow. She looked more alert, eyes wide and focused. Harry felt his chest tighten at the look in her eye. There was a vulnerability that he'd rarely seen. It tore at his heart.
"Hermione?"
She shifted in the bed without uttering a reply and Harry complied silently. They barely fit on the narrow mattress.
"How can I help?" He murmured, his voice soft.
Hermione leaned into him, pushing her body closer to his, needing his touch. "Don't let go."
Words escaped him. He sat there silently as he pulled her towards him, her body pliant. She fell into him completely, her body shaking as tears raked through her body. He held onto to her, his grip steady. Heart aching at her pain. He didn't need to say anything. Didn't need to fix things. He just needed to be with her. Sit with her in the feeling and let her be sad and angry or whatever she wanted to be.
"Are you tired?" Harry asked, quite a while later. They were curled on the bed, legs and arms intertwined. The sun had set.
"I can't sleep." Her voice was rough.
"Wanna read?" Harry supplied, eying her book on her bedside table.
"I wouldn't be able to concentrate." Hermione said quietly.
Harry nodded, a thought striking him, "what if I read to you?"
She lifted her head slightly, "you must be exhausted." She brushed her hand against his face, and he felt himself close his eyes at the sensation, pressing himself closer to her hand.
"I'm fine." He shifted his position, reaching for the book. He sat up, his back resting against the bedhead. Hermione rested next to him, her head on the pillow by his waist. "I may get some words wrong." He added as he pulled out her bookmark and looked at the first page. "Bare with me."
He glimpsed a ghost of a smile on Hermione's lips before launching into the page. He stumbled over a few words here and there but managed better than he thought he would. After a while, he found himself get drawn into the pages. His voice echoed in the room, the sound of the pages turning every few minutes a strange comfort.
When he glanced down at her, he noted her even breathing. Her eyes closed. She was curled into him, her leg still wrapped around his. He put the book down quietly, afraid that he'd wake her up. She didn't stir and he rested comfortably next to her and finally allowed himself to be pulled under.
She woke up in the middle of the night. Slowly. She focused her gaze on him. "Hi."
"Hi."
"What time is it?"
"3:30am."
She nodded, the warm night air filling the room.
"Want to stretch your legs?" Harry asked quietly.
She nodded again, accepting the jumper that Harry handed her. Together they ascended the stairs, hands entwined. He pushed the door open, the sky coming into view as they stepped onto the roof. Harry lead her to the bench, settling down together. She rested her back against him, pulling his arms around him and holding tight. He felt her sigh against him, her body completely relaxed.
"Would you rather live in a place that was always very hot, or very cold?" Harry asked, his voice suddenly disrupting the quiet. Hermione shifted slightly, surprised at the question.
"Pardon?"
"Indulge me." Harry squeezed her gently.
"Cold." Hermione answered, "I could skate. Read. Hot drinks. Rug up."
"Eat a whole box of ice cream or cake?"
"Easy. Ice cream."
"OK. Would you rather lose your ability to speak or have to say everything you are thinking?"
"Hmmmm." Hermione paused, thinking. "Say everything. I'd hate the idea of not talking."
"Live 100 years in the past, or the future?"
"Depends."
"On what?"
"On if you were there with me."
"Where else would I be?" Harry said softly.
"In that case. The past. You would look very handsome in 1900's attire."
Harry let out a laugh, pressing a kiss to her head. They continued talking well into the morning, watching as the sun appeared on the horizon, illuminating the surrounds in a soft morning glow. Hermione turned to him, her face open. Vulnerable.
Hermione raised a hand softly, caressing her cheek softly. The bruise slowly fading. He leaned into his touch, a sigh escaping him. "Thank you."
"For what?" Harry asked quietly, surprised.
"For being my best friend." She replied. She pressed a kiss to his lips that was full of tenderness.
They'd shared countless kisses during the past school year. Some heated, gentle, full of fire. Kisses that made his stomach fill with butterflies. Kisses that left his lips wanting more. Always wanting more. This kiss was different. It shook him on an entirely different level. It spoke to his very core.
"Is there anything I can get you?" Harry asked as they made their way down to the room again. The house was slowly waking up; soft murmurs heard throughout.
Hermione shook her head, "I'm ok."
"Are you sure? Food? Coffee?"
A slight smile at his insistence, "No thank you."
"What about a bath?"
Hermione went to reply before pausing thoughtfully. "You know what. A bath sounds really nice." She sighed, "I must look a sight."
"You look beautiful." He smiled at the look she sent his way, "perhaps a bit grimy but you wear it well."
She rolled her eyes at him, eyes filling with laughter as they made their way to the bathroom. She clasped Harry's hand the entire way, slow in her movements as her body was still weak from losing so much blood.
Harry worked silently as he started the bath, Hermione sitting on the closed toilet watching him quietly. He squirted some bubbles into it, the scent of lavender filling the air as the tub filled. He stood up, turning his eyes to her.
"I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything, ok?" Harry told her gently.
"Stay?" Her voice was almost hesitant. She looked so small, the bright lighting in the bathroom making her look pale.
"Of course." He stepped back, the door closing behind him. She needed help pulling her shirt above her head and he stepped forward softly. Their breathing slow. He gently tugged it over, depositing it to the floor. She sent him a small smile as she lowered herself into the bath, hissing slightly.
Harry knelt beside her, slowly lathering his hands with soap. She leant forward slightly, allowing him access to her back. He worked slowly, his hands gently roaming her body and ridding the skin of its dirt, grime and dried blood. He was silent as he worked, the room filling with the sounds of the water in the tub and their levelled breathing.
"You charmed the water?" Hermione broke the silence suddenly after what seemed like a while. Her hands moved across the surface slowly, moving the bubbles around.
"I did." Harry nodded, "have I impressed you?" He sent her a lopsided grin.
"You have." She sent him a faint smile, "10 points to Gryffindor."
He sent her a soft smile, noticing a slight spark in her eye. "What are you thinking?" He asked as he continued to move his hands across her body, coming to her arms.
"How it was a couple of weeks ago and you were afraid Molly would find you sneaking out of my room." She laughed lightly, "and now you're giving me a bath."
He smiled crookedly at her, his hands gently running over the faint lines on her wrist where she'd been bound. "Things can change pretty quickly, huh?" Suddenly the smile dropped from his face as he couldn't help but remember how close he came to losing her.
"You were in so much pain." The words tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them. He couldn't help but think how it was once again, all his fault. He had tried pushing that particular thought aside for the last few days, but now, looking her in the eye; he couldn't help it.
"You have that look on your face."
He quirked an eyebrow in question, "what look?"
"The look where you think everything that's ever happened to anyone in the world ever is your fault."
"Hermio-"
"Harry." She spoke over him, voice growing stronger. "It wasn't your fault. It isn't your fault."
He chewed his lip, "you were taken. From the place you were meant to be the safest. By someone who was supposed to be your friend. I should've been with you."
"Harry," she said softly. "You can't protect me every moment of every day."
"Yes, I can." He replied, eyes shining and stubborn.
Her eyes softened, so too her voice. "No. You can't."
He shook his head, tears threatening to spill. Hermione caught his hand in hers, her fingers tracing the faded scar on his left hand.
I must not tell lies.
"Would you die for me, Harry?" Her voice caught him off guard, so to the question she was asking.
He met her gaze, "You know I would. In a heartbeat."
She nodded, not at all the least bit surprised before taking a steadying breath. "Would you live for me?"
"Hermione… what are you talking about?"
"What do you want, Harry? Out of all of this?"
He frowned, "I don't understand, why do I want to end it?"
She shrugged, "yeah."
"Because…" Harry paused a moment, wondering how he'd never really considered the question before. "Because people deserve a life without fear and hatred. Because he.."
"What about you, Harry?" She emphasised the you. "You're my best friend." She spoke quietly, "I know you. And I know that you don't think you'll make it out of this alive."
He was about to refute her comment; close to saying she was being dramatic but he stopped at the look in her eye. A shadow crossed his face as he responded.
"The odds aren't exactly in my favour, Hermione."
"Nor have they ever been." She remarked mildly, challenging him, "since you were a child, before you were even born. The odds were never in your favour. You survived Voldemort. Your relatives. You survived 6 years of Hogwarts."
"Maybe this prophecy is all it for me." Harry said quietly, "go out, and take him with me. I'm ok with that, Hermione."
"Well I'm not." Her voice suddenly cracked, eyes lighting with fire. "I'm not ok with that, Harry. Not at all."
"Hermio-"
"I know the risk, Harry. I've always known what it meant being your friend. How danger seemed to follow you around. And I knew how vulnerable I'd make myself when we got together. I don't care about it, Harry. Because the risk? It's got nothing on how I feel about you. Nothing. And nothing can change that. Ever. I don't want you to fight because you want him gone - I want you fight because you want to live, Harry. I want you to live. More than anything."
Ron raised to his feet and coming forwards, enveloped Hermione into his arms. They'd made the trek to the living room, Hermione voicing the desire to spend time with her friends and away from the confines of her room. Harry watched as the brown-haired witch fell into Rom softly, her entire body almost engulfed by Ron's larger one. "You gave us quite the fright there," Ron rubbed her back softly. "I haven't eaten properly in days…" He sent her a wink.
Hermione offered a shaky smile before falling onto the sofa softly. She pulled Harry with her, resting her head in his lap. He ran a hand through her hair, the other playing with her fingers.
Ginny sent both of them a smile, her eyes glistening slightly. Harry noted the hand on her thigh. Draco sat quietly beside her. "It's good to have you back, Hermione."
"Yeah, we need you Granger. I was far outnumbered by Weasley's." Draco dodged the slap a moment later, a smirk on his face. "We need to stick together."
Hope you enjoyed. Please R/R