Clash of the Smashers

Chapter Thirty-Six: A Duel to the not-quite Death

"What?" Link said, too shocked to draw his weapon.

"Joking," Bario said, still grinning.

"Not funny," Link said, peeved.

"Well, I wasn't entirely joking," Bario said, advancing towards Link, who started to back away.

"What do you mean?"
"I do think that we should FIGHT!" Bario said, lunging forward.
Startled, Link stepped back, only to discover there was nothing to step back on…he was at the edge of the upper portion of the ship. He lost his balance and fell, but he managed to turn the fall into a clumsy roll, avoiding any actual injury.

Link jumped to his feet as Bario leapt over him, spinning in midair, and drawing both swords as he faced Link. A look of irritation came over Link as he readied his sword and shield.

"What is this about?"

"It's simple. You don't trust me, and you don't appear to be changing that any time soon, right?"
"Yes."
"Well, then I think you and I should have a duel to get some of that stress off," Bario said, smiling a bit.

"You're kidding," Link said, not sure if he was serious or not.

"Nope. If you hadn't noticed, we're in the middle of a war right now, and like it or not, I've ended up as the de facto leader," Bario said.

"I don't like it…but continue."
"The others lives, and yours are in my hands, and they count on me to help get them through this."
"See, that's what I don't like," Link said.

"I DON'T CARE!" Bario yelled, startling Link, "You think I want to be in charge of people I barely know to stop things they all have more experience with?"

"Well…I would guess not," Link started.

"The answer is NO! But that doesn't matter, because someone has to do it. That person has to be me, since I didn't and STILL don't see anyone stepping up to take charge, and I can't do it if you spend all your time verbally attacking me, and splitting the group apart. Don't you get it? The only way we can possibly do this is if we stick together!"
"…"

"Link?" Bario said, panting a bit after his outburst.

"I'm sorry," Link said.

"For what?" Bario said, pushing Link a little.

"For…being a jerk, and not treating you with respect," Link said, sounding sincere.

"You don't have to respect me…just don't pounce on everything I say as an excuse that I'm evil," Bario said.

"You're right."
"What are you doing?" Bario asked as Link started to walk away.

"Going down…why?"
"Oh no you don't. You think a quick apology is going to fix this? Nuh-uh. We are still going to fight it out."

"But the ship," Link started to say.

"Is on course and steady. Don't worry, this won't take long," Bario said, grinning at Link.

"Alright fine. I've been wanting to get a piece of you for a while…I guess this is the best way to do it," Link said.

"You're going to keep talking, or should I assume your reluctance to fight means that you decided that you really like me…platonically of course," Bario said.

"Oh shut UP!" Link yelled, before aiming a powerful overhead swing at Bario.

Still grinning, Bario raised both his blades up and caught the attack. Link's eyes widened slightly as he recognized the positions and leapt back so fast that Bario almost fell over. Before Bario could comment on that, Link swung at Bario's left side, an attack that Bario easily parried.

"So Link, you don't trust me?" Bario said, stabbing towards Link's chest, which was blocked by his shield.

"Not particularly," Link said, hopping over a low attack.

"Does that really matter though?"

"What?" Link said, startled by the question.

"Does your not trusting me matter?" Bario asked, aiming a series of blows at Link's sword arm.

"How can you ask that? Of course it matters!" Link said jerking his shield forward in an attempt to knock Bario off balance.

"No it doesn't. I am in charge, like it or not, and whether or not you trust me does not affect how the others see me," Bario said, side-stepping the shield.

"What are you saying, that I don't matter?" Link asked angrily, stepping back from Bario's return slice.

"Of course not. Your suspicions however have no proof, and if you keep insisting on them, the others will lose respect for you."
"They will not!" Link yelled.

"They already have, surely you've noticed?" Bario asked, circling warily.

Link had indeed noticed, and Bario's words were starting to pierce his armor of certainty. A quick jump prevented Bario's sword from piercing his side.

"Link, I am the unofficial leader…but if you think that you can do a better job…by all means, take the post," Bario said, before lowering his blade.

Link looked at Bario, sword and shield still raised. The offer seemed too good to be true…and it was. Even if Bario was serious, which Link wasn't too sure about, he really couldn't do a better job. No one else could. Bario had a head for tactics that Link didn't, and the others had no problem following him. Bario had a charisma Link wasn't sure he had. And there was the fact that Bario had saved all their lives a few times on this trip.

Link sighed and hung his head, all the fight drained out of him.

"I'm done. I'm sorry for what I've done…and I want you forgive me. I really have been an idiot."
"Not arguing there…but apology accepted. Now get ready!" Bario said, stabbing forward.

"What are you doing?!" Link demanded, barely blocking the attack.

"This isn't over yet!"

In the bowels of the ship the faint sound of clanging metal caused one of the sleeping Smashers to awaken. Brushing the hair and sleep out of her eyes Samus cocked her head to listen to the sound. Not immediately realizing what it was she got out of her cot and staggered to the door, being careful not to wake the others…and realized Link was gone. A quick look around verified her fear…Bario wasn't there either.
In a startling moment of clarity she realized what the sound was. Swords.
Samus ran out of the room faster than fast. In a blur she turned the corner at the end of the hall and practically leapt up the stairs.
When she reached the top she quickly spotted Link and Bario engaged in what seemed to be a deadly duel. As she watched Bario stabbed towards Link, who blocked it and then rolled to side before spinning back up by Bario's back, where Link slashed towards the unprepared Bario.

"LINK! NO!" Samus said, causing Link to freeze in surprise.
Link and Bario both turned to face Samus, confusion evident in their faces.

"What?" Bario asked.

"What do you mean what? Link was about to kill you!"
"No I wasn't!" Link said, affronted by the very idea.

"Yes you were! Geez Link, how could you attack Bario!"
"I didn't!"
"Don't give me that! I saw you!"
"Uh…Samus…he didn't. We were just…sparring," Bario said.

"You were…oh. Sorry," Samus said, quite abashed.

"Its fine," Link said, hurt by the accusation.

"Well back to the duel…looks like you won," Bario said.

"What? Oh…right. Guess so."

"Look…I know you still have your doubts, but I want you to know that as long as we're journeying together I won't do anything to harm you or anyone else on this boat. I will help you defeat all enemies we encounter until Mist…Master Hand is destroyed," Bario said, the conviction in his voice surprising both Samus and Link, and drawing their attention away from the slight slip of the tongue. Bario held out his hand.

Link stared deeply at Bario, expecting his hand to twinge, since his Triforce of Courage allowed him to read people really well, he was also hoping it could tell whether they were lying. Whether it could or not it didn't react, and with little reluctance, Link shook Bario's hand, releasing all of his doubts…at least for now.

Meanwhile the others, awakened by the noises upstairs, and Samus's mad dash, slowly straggled onto the main deck of the ship.

"Morning," Falco said, feeling better than he had in a long time.

The others said their hellos too, and Bario suggested they go back down and have something to eat, since they were going to be reaching K. Rool soon. He told them he was fine, he had something earlier. As Link walked past he stopped and turned towards Bario.

"Hey…I had a dream last night," Link said.

Bario paused in his way back to the ship's wheel, his expression stony and unreadable.

"Yes?" Bario asked.

"It was more of a nightmare…and I had one question for you," Link said. When Bario didn't respond, Link continued.

"Do you know who…or what Kidar is?"
"No," Bario said, in a monotone.

"Alright," Link said, before walking past Bario, mind churning with questions, and definitely considering the prospect that Bario was lying.

Bario took his place at the wheel, and while the others ate and talked, he steered them towards their destination. After about twenty minutes, Diddy came up and walked over towards Bario. He stood there for a while, as if trying to think of something to say, when he saw a dark shape far off in the ocean.

"What's that?" Diddy asked.

"That is where we are going," Bario said with a grin.
They continued traveling forward and eventually everyone had wandered back onto the main deck, and were focused on the shape in the water.

It soon became clear that the shape was a large gray fortress erected on a small island. The front of the fortress was directly on top of the edge of the island and it was quite apparent that there were no obvious entrances. It also became clear as it became closer that Bario was not slowing down.

"Bario…you're not slowing down are you?" Diddy inquired.

"Nope," Bario said, still with that faint grin that he's been showing a lot of lately.

"So, no retracting of sails, turning about, or throwing of anchors?" Diddy questioned, hoping most seriously that the answer to at least one of those would be yes.

"Oh definitely not," Bario answered.

"So…we're going to crash into that fortress," Falco said.

"I don't know of any other way to get in," Bario said,

The others stared for a moment, not sure what to do, and then, as if to snap them out of the stupor Bario called out an order as the fortress filled their view.

"Everybody hang on!"
The wind was pushing the ship fast, but for some reason it seemed to be traveling faster than the wind, and was not running aground as the water became shallower. No one had any time to worry about these facts as the front of the large ship slammed into the fortress's side wall.

There were several moments of frightening creaking and cracking, and it seemed like the bow of the ship would snap on the hard rock…but in the end, wood beat rock and the ship knocked down a good chunk of the wall…although the front of the ship was crushed beyond all recognition.

Most of the Smashers were thrown to the ground by the collision, with the exception of Mario who seemed to have frighteningly good balance, and Bario who had been holding quite tightly to the ship's wheel.

"Well that was completely insane," Link said, getting back to his feet.

"But effective!" Bario responded.

"Next time, warn us a bit before you do something like that, okay?" Samus said.

Shaking the shock out of the system, Bario directed them towards the front of the ship, where they climbed down. It's important to note that with a decent amount of food in their stomachs, and a good rest, they felt better than they had had for a while.

They managed to drop off into a large room that appeared to be some kind of chemical storage area. It was a wreck now, although it would be difficult to see a room NOT look like a wreck after a giant ship wrecked into it, creating another wreck as a byproduct of the now wrecked ship wrecking the currently wrecked room. Wreck.

A large portion of vials and beakers had broken, and were currently smoking on the ground, creating an unpleasant smell. As quickly as possible the group moved to a door away from the ship and used it to enter a new room that was about as large as the previous one, if not larger.

The new room appeared to be where the majority of the chemicals were used, and it had the appearance of a disordered lab. A large table lay near the far wall, and various shelves and machinery were strewn around the room. No windows were present; the only light came from lights attached to the ceiling and walls.

The only things of note were the large round metallic objects strewn around the edges of the room, about two on each side, one at Diddy's height and the other at Bario's. Additionally at each corner were what appeared to be orange tubes protruding from the floor. Diddy noticed these immediately, but considering he never actually fought K. Rool the third time, as it was Dixie who rescued him from the vile crocodile when he was residing in the laboratory, he was unable to recall what they were.

Unsure of where to go, the Smashers wandered around a bit, spreading out as they did so.

As they examined the area, trying to find something that would lead them to K. Rool a loud thumping could be heard above them, as if there was a second floor.
"What was that?" Raichu asked.

"I have no idea," Diddy said, "Although this place is really familiar…I feel like I'm missing something…"
It soon became apparent what Diddy was missing when a large section of the concrete ceiling dropped down, nearly squashing Kirby, who only managed to barely roll out of the way after hearing the sound. Before anyone else could react, something bulky floated down from the hole and stared at the group of heroes.

At least, they think it stared. It was big, about the size of K. Rool, but cylindrical, and very green. There were strange kinds of gears and slots sticking out of it, as if whoever built it wanted to make it very obvious that it was a machine, despite the fact that it was clearly a large metal robot. It was very obvious either way.

Its head was dome-shaped, and it had a narrow visor-like part on the front that shifted between a vibrant orange to a dark red. Two antennas were on top of the dome, and while one was bent, it wasn't very obvious what either of them were for. Rounding out the strange…robot, was the fact that instead of legs it had a single strong jet of yellow-orange flame shooting out of its lower region, keeping it aloft.
"Kaos!" Diddy said, seeming quite startled.

"What's that?" Raichu demanded, as Kaos made a strange beeping noise.

"A robot made by K. Rool, but it was destroyed!"
"Like being destroyed ever stopped anything," Link said, drawing his bow.

"Don't worry about impossibilities…just keep away from that thing and open fire!" Bario commanded.

The others agreed, all firing their attacks. Link's arrow bounced harmlessly off the thick metal armor, while Bario's magic balls, Meta's energy balls and Mario's firebombs seemed to cause little damage. Falco's laser, as usual was mostly useless, and Diddy's peanuts were pathetic. Kirby threw his cutter, but it barely made a light scratch and returned, also uselessly. Raichu's and Samus's attacks, being electrical in nature caused some damage, but Kaos seemed indifferent to the onslaught.

"Currently analyzing threat level," Kaos said in a stereotypical robot voice.

"It can talk?" Falco asked.

"Yes," Kaos said, "Threat level analyzed. Current opponents equal…minimal threat. Recommend minor action," Kaos said.

"Now wait just a second…we are not a minor threat!" Diddy said.

"Logic center indicates otherwise."
"Stop being so logical!" Diddy said, running towards Kaos. An instant before he hit the mechanical monstrosity, a large spring-powered boxing glove shot out of a hatch, slamming Diddy hard in the chest, and flinging him quite far, before retracting just as quickly.

"No." Kaos said.

Link than charged forward, followed by Kirby, while the others kept up their projectile barrage, trying to find a weak spot. Link and Kirby both managed to avoid the boxing gloves shooting out at them, but three rotating blades stationed at different heights on the robot popped out, one of them right next to Link.

He ducked, but Kirby jumped, managing to hop off the top of one of the blades, and then floated up to Kaos's head. A peanut narrowly missed Kirby as Diddy rejoined the fray, but he didn't even notice as he pulled out his hammer and slammed it into Kaos's strange head.

The head of Kaos bobbed down, before returning to its state, and Kaos floated back, but it wasn't in time to prevent Link from hitting the head with a bomb arrow. The resulting explosion knocked Kirby to the ground, startled, but not injured, while Kaos's head started to smoke.

"I think its hurt," Raichu said, pausing in his attack.

The others paused as well, as Kaos's head floated off. Well, actually, it wasn't its head, more like a helmet, as there was a steely gray head beneath that, with the vague appearance of a human male. Well, it would resemble that, if human's had large pointy gray fangs and a black hole for a mouth. The helmet floated sedately a few feet over Kaos.

"Threat level reanalyzed…current level of threat: Moderate. Self-recommend immediate action," Kaos said.

"You bet we're a threat," Falco said, aiming a laser shot at Kaos.

Kaos responded by shooting a large jet of flame down, nearly scorching Kirby. Kirby managed to evade it, but Raichu was hit by a wide laser shot from the visor of the floating helmet, that was about the same color of the visor.

"Ow!" Raichu said, a patch of his fur smoking from where the beam hit.

Samus was unhappy. She really wanted her suit. She'd like to see this Kaos stand up to a Super Missile or two. Unfortunately for her, she was suitless and clad only in her blue jumpsuit, and she was armed with a versatile, but not particularly powerful weapon. She felt naked, and not in the literal way, although recently she had wished that she had a bit more on than the jumpsuit. Something about wearing a suit that feels…and looks painted on while battling evil villains made her feel slightly uncomfortable. Considering that she was currently battling an evil robot, this might not have been the best time to worry about it…or perhaps it is the best time.

Kaos shot a jet of flame out of its bottom again, this time trying to hit the nearby Link, who managed to roll away, although part of his tunic smoked.

The helmet shot a blast at Falco, but expecting it he activated his Reflector, turning the attack back and stunning the visor for a second as it tried to reroute itself after its own laser hit it.

Before it could recover Mario leapt high into the air and slammed the floating helmet hard with his hammer. Already stunned, the helmet flew into the join where Kaos's head met the green body and exploded, removing the apparently poorly made second head.

"Whoa," Diddy said, quite startled.

Kaos seemed weakened, but he was far from defeated. From the spot where the helmet and head had stayed, a third cranial protrusion appeared. This one was black and was cylindrical, like a soup can. It had pipe-like sections attached to it, and looked even weirder than the gray head.

Speaking of, the gray head suddenly started twitching, and with a familiar looking jet of flame shooting from the bottom of its "neck" hovered into the air.

"Threat level reanalyzed…again…current level of threat: High," Kaos said, still showing no emotion.

"That thing is freaky as all get out," Falco said, referring to the floating head.
Kaos's gray head suddenly shot forward, horizontally like an evil missile. At the same time, small black round objects came shooting out of Kaos's new head…and they exploded upon hitting the ground.

Samus skillfully dodged the bombs; one of the plus sides of not wearing her suit was that her speed was drastically higher. Her dodging was echoed by the startlingly agile Mario, while everyone else evaded or avoided the explosions. Kirby was unable to avoid a bomb, as was Bario, and the two of them suffered minor damage.

Meanwhile the head flew straight towards Meta Knight, who side-stepped and slashed it with his sword as it flew past. Knocked off balance by the blow it slowed, and that allowed Samus to utilize one of the more interesting parts of her stun gun, the Paralyzer. She shot out a yellowish beam of electricity, similar to her grapple beam and it latched onto the gray head.
Using the momentum of the impromptu missile she spun it and flung it into the black head on top of Kaos. With an almighty explosion the second head exploded, destroying the third head, and causing Kaos to collapse to the ground.

"Detecting status…status equals: Bad," Kaos said before trailing off. All of the moving parts on it ceased their moving.

"Did we finish him?" Link inquired.

"OH YES!" a loud voice boomed, and a large being dropped down from the hole in the ceiling that Kaos opened up.

"Agh! You!" Diddy said, quite startled…a feeling that was echoed by the others as they realized who was standing before them…and what exactly he was wearing.

It was K. Rool, but he had discarded his kingly and piratey attire, for something even stranger: A bulky white lab coat, full of pockets and strange sciency items. His head sported the same circular band Mario had as Dr. Mario, and his hands were covered by massive black gloves. He had some kind of metal contraption strapped to his back, and seemed more off balance…and more disturbed, than usual.

"What is up with that get-up?" Falco asked.

"It is my necessary attire!" K. Rool said, "I am now Baron K. Roolenstein!"
"No, you're not," Bario said.

"What? Of course I am."
"You're no more Roolenstein, than you were a Kaptain. Merely changing your outfit doesn't change your name! And your name changing…doesn't change you!" Bario yelled with surprising vehemence.
Startled by the outburst, it took K. Rool a moment to remember what he was going to say.

"Uh…oh, right! You guys are going to pay for destroying my robot!"
"If you didn't want us to destroy it, then why did you have it attack us?" Raichu asked.

"Because I was under the impression it would destroy you!"
"So it's your fault it got destroyed then?" Samus asked.

"Huh? Well…no…but…AGH! How dare you CONFUSE A BARON! DIE!"
Rool followed up his threat by pulling out a strange remote control from his lab coat and pressing one of several buttons. Immediately the pack on his back extended a green metal pole that spread out into a helicopter like blade that lifted him several feet off the ground, despite the physical impossibility of that.
"Wow…that was unexpected," Falco said.

With a cry of rage Rool reached down with his massive arms and grabbed Kaos's battered body and threw it at Diddy. Diddy dodged, but Mario, who was behind Diddy didn't have time…so he slammed it with his hammer, deflecting the flying giant robot, and somehow preventing himself from being hit. Quite a show of strength. Kaos then finished its life as a pile of scrap by shattering upon hitting the wall.

K. Rool did not seem happy about his robot being completely destroyed, and so, with surprising speed, he flew at Mario. Mario rolled under the airborne Kremling, and as K. Rool tried to turn around, Link hit him with a bomb arrow in the jetpack thing. It fizzled and K. Rool crashed to the ground.

The others backed away from the large enemy as he flailed around, and trained their weapons on him.

"Come on K. Rool," Bario said, "Just surrender…you have no chance of winning."

"Oh?" K. Rool said, as he pulled out his remote.

"Don't let him press it! FIRE!" Bario commanded.

K. Rool ignored their attacks, although they had to be hurting, and activated his jet pack again, using his body to protect it. When he was about seven feet in the air he hit a switch, and the strange objects around the walls of the area sent out lines of electricity that connected and formed a huge plus sign two electrical lines high in the center of the area. Falco and Mario were both singed, and quickly backed away from the painful arcs of electricity.

K. Rool laughed, but quickly stopped when the Smashers opened fire again, avoiding the areas where the electricity was traveling. He swerved a little bit, but was unable to dodge the majority of the attacks, so with a scowl he tapped a third switch on his remote, which activated the pipe-like objects in the corners.
They swiveled to face the Smashers and then fired massive orange fireballs, with diameters equal to Diddy or Raichu's height. The fireball shooting machines seemed like they were designed to focus mostly on the largest living creature on the ground, as Link, with his excessive equipment had several shooting at him.

The Smashers immediately broke off their attacks and started dodging the fireballs, a task that was easy for some, but difficult for others. Link managed to deflect one of them, but the force behind it knocked him into the lines of electricity, severely shocking him before he managed to get out, while Kirby was unable to dodge one of the fireballs at all and suffered a pretty serious hit, as did Bario.

K. Rool cackled as the Smashers frantically attempted to dodge his machines, and tried to press a fourth button his remote…only to realize it only had three buttons. Irritated he threw it at Diddy, who swatted it out of the air where it shattered upon hitting the ground.
Unfortunately that did nothing to stop the devices, and the Smashers were starting to get tired.
K. Rool's maniacal laughter continued as he was confident in his dangerous device's ability to prevent the group from retaliating. He soon discovered how very wrong he was when Meta Knight flew up, and surrounded himself in an orange tornado and spun towards K. Rool.

The fireballs were only designed to hit ground targets, as were the electric lines, so they did nothing to prevent the slow-moving K. Rool from being caught in Meta's attack. K. Rool was battered a bit, but retaliated with a mighty punch that Meta barely dodged. An energy ball from Meta's sword stunned K. Rool enough for Meta to drill into K. Rool with the point of his blade, damaging him some more.

At this point, Diddy activated his jet pack and flew over a fireball and towards K. Rool, firing peanuts. K. Rool, quite irritated now reared back to hit Diddy, but Meta slashed his arm, distracting him long enough for Diddy to swerve to the side of the large villain and throw an orange grenade at his jetpack, which exploded. Diddy and Meta than landed on the ground.
Again losing power K. Rool crashed to the ground…right in the middle of the electric plus sign. The shocking went on for eighteen seconds, with K. Rool trapped by the device he activated, until it destroyed his jetpack, turning it into a charred mess sending a resulting electrical volt back down the line that caused the electric machines to short out and explode.

There were several moments of stunned silence as a smoking K. Rool quivered in rage. Than the silence was broken as his own fireball shooting devices decided that he was the largest living creature on the ground…apparently he was not thinking very clearly when he designed them. He was immediately pelted by several large fireballs.

With a cry of rage, K. Rool ignored the Smashers and ran towards a fireball flinging creation, disregarding the fireballs, and destroyed it with a mighty swing. Then, continuing undaunted despite the firepower being sent his way he destroyed the next one…and the one after that, and then the final one.

After that the Smashers stared at a smoking and singed K. Rool, quite shocked by his ability to remain standing after the beating he just received.

"Looks like your plan failed," Bario said, pointing his right-hand sword at K. Rool, the others gathering around him, ready to finish off K. Rool.

"Not quite," K. Rool, a disturbing smile coming to his face as he reached into his pockets, "You don't think I've survived this long by being stupid…do you?"
K. Rool pulled out another remote, this one with only one large red button. The others realized immediately that the remote was bad news, but before they could attack, he slammed the button down…and the floor opened up beneath the Smashers.
Screaming they plummeted down into a dark abyss, K. Rool's laughter following them in their unexpected journey…