A/N: Yay! The Valentine's Day chapter! Don't let this chapter fool you, I have no problem with this holiday, because I got chocolate! Hooray! Oh, right, be polite, me. How was your Valentine's Day? I've been excited for this chapter.. Been planning it for a while. Not quite sure what I want to come next. Yes, this does mean that I have skipped forward a few months.

"Happy Valentine's day!" Oh, God, make it stop. The second he was shoved through the familiar door of the hell hole, Hyde was bombarded by this phrase. Valentine's Day was just a stupid holiday made up by the man for Hallmark stores to make money off of. Also, Valentine's Day is different depending on age. For obscenely old people, it's probably just to send cards to kids and grand kids, just to prove to the world that they're still there. For middle aged people, it's either to show, whether it's true or not, your spouse that you still care, or wallow in sadness about being unmarried. For college kids and teenagers, it's a chance to get laid, and for kids and everyone associated with them, it's all about candy and paper hearts.

Ugh. Nearly everyone was dressed in red or pink. Hyde was happy to be wearing black. Shows what he thought of this holiday. He almost wanted to crawl back into the car with Laurie. The conversation between them had been surprisingly pleasant. When he had told her about getting busted for overdosing, she just shrugged and said "whatever. It was going to happen to you eventually." Yeah, she had seriously meant what she said, but at least she didn't bother him about it. Ever since then, she had been one of the people he could tolerate the most. Hyde was sure she would be "collecting valentines" tonight.

Lizzie, who was uncharacteristically wearing a red ruffled dress, ran up to greet Hyde. He figured she was going to say hi, but instead, she pointed to Brad and jerked her head towards Hyde, saying; "see! I told you he didn't die!" Hyde stared at her quizzically. Yeah, it had been a while since he was here, but dead? Little kids were dumb, man.

Brad scuttled out of his char with a sloppy smile across his face. "Hi Steve!"

"Uh…hey, Brad." Hyde said.

"Stevie!" Jodie gasped, bug eyed. She must of thought he was dead, too.

Hearing everyone talk caused Wendy to turn her head and soon she too had joined the little posse.

Hyde didn't like this. He still wouldn't accept that he had somehow become a part of this gang in addition to his real gang.

"Lollipop?" Wendy asked, shoving one at Hyde's chest.

Hyde stuttered for a second. "That's cool," he finally settled on. Wendy smiled as if she had somehow triumphed and dropped the candy into his hand. Man, she really got a kick out of people acting the way she wanted them to. Hyde slowly unwrapped the lollipop and stuck in in his mouth, glad to have an excuse not to talk and at the same time forming jokes about Laurie and what she puts in her mouth. Typical little boy humor, immediately turning to gross stuff, but he didn't pick up on that.

"All right, kids," one of the wardens called, "sit down, please! It's time to make valentines!"

The lollipop seemed to turn sour. Steven Hyde was opposed to valentines, especially handmade ones, and super especially for damn little kids.

Hyde decided to screw with the instructions and make "abstract" valentines, which really meant cutting paper into random shapes to annoy the perky wardens. He grinned at their slight frowns as they glimpsed at his work.

"Cool," said Brad admiringly.

"That's not how you're supposed to make them!" Wendy complained.

Lizzie looked sort of shocked. "You can make them however you want, stupid!" She argued, holding up hers, which was a triangle shaped card with a picture of a rabbit on it.

Wendy's eyebrows crinkled in confusion. "That's wrong."

Hyde swayed his head back and forth. No such thing as wrong here. Of course, his disagreement with the girl didn't mean he wanted to make cards.

Kids were scurrying around the room, passing out cards and candies to the objects of their momentary desire. Wendy gave one to some blond boy who seemed to be accumulating a large pile, and Lizzie kept staring at a red haired boy, but refused to give him a card. Instead, she put her valentine cards in her backpack and went over to shove the boy. Brad was deep in thought, making what must have been his seventeenth card, sticking his tongue out in concentration.

Jodie was swinging her legs and giggling. "Here," she said softly, dropping a piece of paper shaped like a heart in front of Hyde.

Hyde stopped what he was doing suddenly. Shit. This kid liked him? He scrunched his face up in a mixture of disgust in confusion, almost gagging on instinct. Jesus Christ, he felt almost like a pedophile. Well, no, he didn't return whatever Jodie felt for him, but nonetheless, he still felt nearly sick. Man, was this why she insisted on calling him Stevie? Gross.

"Be my valentine?" Jodie asked hopefully. Brad looked up at her.

Hyde hesitated, figuring out to break his feelings to her as nice as possible. "No."

Jodie looked at him, her lower lip beginning to tremble. Shit, now he made her cry.

"Hey!" Brad said angrily from across the table. "Are you trying to steal my girl?"

Hyde put his hands up in frustration. "What?" Nothing made sense in the ridiculously primitive and stupid social structure of this class. "What are you talking about?"

"Jodie's mine!" Brad insisted, betray lacing his voice.

"Have her," Hyde said, "she's yours, man." This only made Jodie cry harder, and she ran to her sister on the other side of the room. Hyde put his head in his hands. Ugh, he knew today was going to be especially hellish.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" Some little boy was asking a girl named Jessica at the next table over.

"Jessie, no!" Brad whined. "Tyler, Jessie's mine!"

"Ew!" Jessie screeched.

Brad didn't notice her reaction, though, because he was too busy stomping off to accuse some other kid of stealing one of "his" girls.

Hyde sat slack jawed for a minute. What the…what the hell just happened? Man, a stake to the head didn't sound so bad about now. Just…what the hell, man?

He looked down at the red card Jodie gave him. Damn. He'd probably throw it away when she wasn't looking.

Later that night, he was telling Laurie and Eric about his day. "You know, a Kelso thinking he's a ladies man and being a moron, authority being lame, made a little girl cry, got some guy mad at me, got some candy."

Eric seemed surprised and amused. "You made a girl cry? What, did you reject her and break her heart?"

Hyde shrugged. "Who cares, man? It's a fake holiday, after all." And after how his fake holiday went, he was going to upgrade it from fake to forcefully forgotten.

A/N: Yay, unsympathetic Hyde! Thanks cravingsmiles for bouncing off ideas with me for this. Remember that song I told you about? With the deserted island? Yeah, you should read this again while playing that. Anyways, you guys are still awesome even if you don't review, I'm cool with having a horde of readers. So thanks, y'all. Dunno what'll happen next…I have some stuff, but I wanted to save it for later…oh, since I skipped ahead a month or two, little Hyde is now officially 5. Yay! What shall I do to celebrate…hmm…plotting, here I come.