'Jonny you can't stay here' Jac spoke to her husband as they lay entwined together in the dimly lit bedroom.

'Why?' He kissed her neck softly 'you love me Jac, you can't deny that now.'

'If you stay it will be confusing for Ava.' Jac rolled away from him, denying herself his wonderful touch.

'Confusing how?' he rolled after her putting his arm around her, refusing to give up on her.

'Because I've told her we're doing a trial separation, if you stay then it's not really a trial is it?'

'No, it's me coming home to my family' he kissed the back of her shoulder.

'Jonny I need time, space to think' Jac pulled herself out of his arms sat herself up on the edge of the bed.

'How can you deny yourself what you want?' Jonny sat up behind her and swept her hair of her neck so he could continue to kiss it knowing this would weaken her resolve to resist him.

'Stop it Jonny' she didn't move but something about her tone made him stop. He moved himself so he was sat down next to her on the bed. 'You're right I do love you, I do want you. But the arguments, the way you shut me out and the way you made a decision about Ava without discussing it with me; they're not healthy signs Jonny.'

'When do I shut you out?' Jonny protested.

'All the time when it comes to Amelia. Sometimes it's although you're pretending she never even existed' Jac sighed.

'Losing our baby was the most painful thing I've ever had to live through' Jonny took hold of Jac's hand in his 'so I'm sorry that I find it hard to talk about her.'

'I need to talk about her Jonny' Jac pulled her hand out of his grasp 'what is it that Reverend Alice is always saying, the dead are not truly gone if they remain on the lips of the living?'

'It's too hard Jac' Jonny muttered.

'What about Ava? What happens the next time you two disagree on something? Are you going to constantly threaten to send her away?'

'No Jac, look it wasn't what I meant. I'd just been thinking about the possibility but then she got me so mad it just slipped out.' Jonny defended himself.

'Precisely she made you angry and you slipped up, said something hurtful' Jac glared at him 'we've got a lot of teenage years to go Jonny, what other hurtful things can you say to her?'

'Look clearly I have a lot of making up to do with Ava and we need to sort out whatever reason she has to make her think I don't love her but don't you see that me being away from home is just going to make it so much harder?'

'I need to do what's best for Ava Jonny, she's all that really matters in all of this.'

'You think that isn't what I want? She's my child too!' Jonny stood up and started to get dressed, knowing he wasn't getting anywhere.

'I want her to grow up feeling loved and cherished in a secure family environment, the same thing her mother wanted. Right now, how we are, is failing her. Things need to change Jonny.'

'You need some sleep' Jonny finished dressing and cupped her face in his hands 'you're worn out' he leaned over her and planted a soft kiss on her lips. She didn't pull away, instead she responded kissing him back. 'I'll come over tomorrow after work' he spoke softly 'I'm not giving up on us Jac. What Ava needs is both of us together, how we were before things got so stressful and messed up.' He kissed her again 'call me if you need me.' He kissed her one last time before silently creeping out of the bedroom and down the stairs leaving Jac sat alone on their bed deep in thought.

'Jac?' Evelyn quietly spoke the redheads name from the doorway of her bedroom.

'Hmm' Jac stirred from her light sleep and sat up 'What's up Evelyn?' she mumbled sleepily.

'Where is Isaac now?' Evelyn asked quietly.

'Well he'll be in the hospital mortuary' Jac answered the child honestly slipping out of bed and taking hold of the child's hand, leading her back towards the spare room.

'Do you think he'll be lonely there?' Evelyn asked tearfully as she clambered back up onto the bed.

'Its only his body that is there sweetheart, his spirt, the thing that made Isaac, Isaac has gone' Jac sat herself down on the bed next to the child steeling herself for a conversation about a heaven she didn't really believe in.

'Well where has he gone then?' Evelyn asked leaning against the woman who was hard and bony, not soft and curvy like her mother but as Jac wrapped her arms around her it was comforting just the same.

'He's in Heaven of course' Ava spoke up from the doorway. She had heard Evelyn's light footsteps as she had passed her bedroom door and gotten up in case her Aunt needed any help. 'No one can be lonely in Heaven.'

'Who would Isaac know in Heaven?' Evelyn asked as Ava sat herself on the end of the bed 'he hardly knew anyone.'

'Well he knew my Granddad and he's in Heaven and Granddad knew lots people who would love to get know Isaac' Ava comforted the child.

'What do you think Heaven is like?' Evelyn asked sleepily as Jac pulled the duvet back over the child's rounded body.

'I think it's warm and sunny with lots of trees and birds. It's green and full of flowers and everyone is happy.'

'Do you think there's a beach? Isaac always liked the beach.' Evelyn closed her eyes as she listened to Ava's softly spoken words.

'Of course there are beeches, with soft warm sand and clear oceans you could spend all day swimming in if you wanted.' Ava watched as Evelyn's breathing became deep and even. 'I think Isaac would be happy in a Heaven like that.'

'Thank you' Jac mouthed at Ava smiling softly as she carefully slipped her arm away from Evelyn. She adjusted the bed cover over child as Ava crept out of bedroom waiting her aunt in the hall.

'What do you think Heaven is like?' Ava asked Jac softly after Jac had quietly closed the door to Evelyn's bedroom.

Jac put her arm around Ava's shoulders as they walked into the child's bedroom. 'If you're asking what I believe in then there isn't a Heaven.'

'I know you believe in God Auntie Jac, you can stop pretending' Ava rolled her eys as she got into bed.

'You didn't ask me about God' Jac lay down next to her niece.

'So you do believe there's something?' Ava yawned.

'Maybe' Jac admitted. 'Possibly.'

'Can I start back at St Catherine's on Monday?' Ava suddenly asked.

'Is that what you want?' Jac spoke with surprise.

'Maybe' Ava shrugged.

'If you really hate it after a few weeks I promise we'll think of something else' Jac smoothed Ava's hair 'but I'm proud of you for being willing to give it another go.'

'I'm sorry I've caused so much trouble' Ava spoke quietly.

'You're worth all the trouble' Jac kissed Ava's cheek.

'When is Uncle Jonny going to come home?' Ava asked.

'I don't know. Would you like him to come home?' Jac asked.

'I might be cross with him but I miss him, he'll always be my Uncle Jonny' Ava shrugged.

'He's coming over to see you after work' Jac held Ava tightly.

'Can he stay for dinner?' Ava asked 'we could cook you a meal'

'I don't know how long he can stay for sweetheart.'

'You will work things out though won't you?' Ava yawned sleepily 'you're not going to spilt up for good?'

'It's complicated Ava' Jac spoke softly.

'But you're sure it's not all my fault?' Ava asked half asleep.

'None of it is your fault Pumpkin, it's just… complicated that's all.'

'Seems silly to give up on something you said was so wonderful' Ava was almost asleep now 'I thought you and Uncle Jonny would be married for ever. If I ever fall in love I wanted to be like you two.'

'Like what?' Jac lay her head down on the pillow next to Ava.

'Just normal, nothing false' Ava mumbled 'just to be together because you want to be, not because it fits the picture perfect.'