Part 2: updated 04/24/17
Chapter 35
Part 1
It hurts to see the damage she has done to that fragile wounded body. It hurts to know that their relationship is no longer what it used to be. It hurts even more to see Lucy again screaming in agony as she is being tased by Petrie. Standing behind the transparent mirror in the next room, Amy could only pray for this to end soon. It will end. She's sure of it. Lucy may be tough and stubborn but no one can withstand the pain generated by 1200 volt electric pulses for too long. Seeing Petrie putting the taser down by her side, she is relieved to see that Lucy finally succumbed. Forgive me.
Blue skies, pinkish red flowers, palm trees everywhere, and trees with mangos, papayas and star fruit caused everyone to gasp except for those who have been here before. The 8 hour plane ride was exhausting for everyone especially for Lucy who had her hands cuffed the entire time. Breathing in the sweet warm summer air, Amy had once imagined standing in the balcony admiring the beautiful beach with her partner wrapping her arms around her from behind, but she never thought it would be like this. She never thought her last mission would be the place where Lucy had once suggested for their honeymoon. Seeing Lucy lying exhaustedly on the couch, she took each step towards her with no other intention except to get close to her. But her attempt in doing so again failed when Lucy suddenly got off the couch.
"Where are you going?"
Petrie's sudden presence caught everyone's attention. Lucy didn't respond and headed to the bathroom. But before stepping inside, she let Petrie know that she didn't appreciate being treated this way. That's not a threat but everyone knows what she meant by it. Once out of the bathroom, she let everyone know how she feels by taking her time walking towards the couch with hands cuffed in front and putting her feet on the coffee table while ignoring Petrie's question and only responded after taking a long sip of the Pinapple Lassi.
"If you want to go, I suggest you get tickets to tomorrow's event."
"What event?"
As long as Amy can remember, Bobby lacks attention to detail. If he has that, he should've noticed the sign placed inside the reception area. Maybe he just noticed the woman in the shimmering dress with long legs dancing with a man in the display and not the purpose of the event.
"What kind of game are you playing here?" Petrie is running out of patience which everyone noticed. "If you're thinking of ways out of this, then don't waste your time."
Amy is not aware of the deal Lucy made with Petrie until now. Hundreds millions of dollars, how much exactly? Lucy didn't say but Petrie seems to be convinced that whatever the secret is is worth that amount. Otherwise, she wouldn't have been able to convince her boss to spend thousands of dollars for this trip and live in this expensive apartment condo with a master bedroom and a beach in the front.
"Get the tickets, get me dinner, and get these handcuffs off."
The first two requests sound doable but getting the handcuffs off, Lucy, she's not going to do that. As expected, Petrie denied her third request but did get everything else including her fourth request which confused everybody except for Amy who knew why but she's just not sure of the reason. Is there a need to disguise as a man? Amy didn't think so but Lucy seems to have a good reason for it.
"There may be others…possibly enemies of my father…." The seriousness on her face is visible. Her tone is different from before. No further explanation is provided but Amy as well as others understood the consequences if her father's enemies recognize her. "So, who wants to be my partner?"
Amy thought it was obvious that it would be her but the question was directed to Petrie and the two female agents.
"Jane, you go with her tomorrow. Bobby, you go with Amy…"
Amy was about to jump in to make another suggestion but Lucy's response surprised her.
"She can't go."
Amy couldn't understand before but now it's becoming clearer. All those accusations were just excuses to prevent me from coming along. Isn't it, Lucy? Where is that place? She has no idea but somehow Lucy found out. What is inside? She doesn't know but it seems that Lucy doesn't want her to go, possibly afraid that she'll get hurt. But what about you?
"Do I need to remind you that you are in no position to give orders?"
"Fine..."
It made sense before but now hearing her response as if she didn't care, Amy is again confused with her ulterior motive. Everywhere Lucy went, the female agents followed so she never got a chance to talk to her in private. She didn't think she would get an opportunity until Jane rejected to the idea of sleeping in the same bedroom with Lucy.
"Agent, this is an order not a request."
"…but…what if she has to go to the bathroom, I'm not going to be able to handle her." Can't blame her. What Lucy did in the interrogation room frightened all of them.
"She'll be here with you…"
"umm…ma'am…" Danika shyly raised her hand up like a little girl in elementary school. "I'm…not feeling well…" Seeing her left hand placed over her tummy, Amy knew why. Petrie should too.
"me…too…" Jane quickly added before leaving the bedroom in a hurry without getting permission from Petrie. With the way she was wincing in pain and holding her stomach, it looked like the Hawaiian dinner didn't agree with her. But most likely, she's faking it. If Bobby didn't go to bed early, it's possible that he would be chosen but there is no way Lucy would let him sleep in the same room.
"Look, I'm not going to try to escape."
"…and you wouldn't because you like to be held against your will?" Petrie said with sarcasm. If this were a high-rise hotel, this wouldn't be a problem. She regretted reserving an apartment condo with only 2 floors near the beach but it was necessary for the purpose of going in and out more easily. Besides, she's afraid that she would cause a scene, thus alerting hotel guests and management that they're holding a criminal without making them aware. "Then I guess you'll just have to hold it until morning."
"Fine…"
Amy was again surprised that she didn't make a big deal out of it.
Seeing Lucy with both arms extended up, handcuffs around her wrist with the other end cuffed to the bedframe, Petrie is satisfied until she heard "Good night…" It might be two words but Petrie didn't expect those two words from anyone in her position. It's the tone in which she said it caused her to become concerned. Nobody in her position being tied up the way she is would have anything to say except words of profanity. The window could easily be opened if she can get the handcuffs off. Lanai may be a small island with an area of 140 miles but finding a person in the trees, hotels and resorts would still be difficult. Getting the handcuffs off without a key is impossible for her but it's not for the criminal mastermind who escaped numerous times.
"look after her…and before any of YOU has anything to say, think about the position you're in! You are not…and I repeat…you are not in a position to object!" That didn't stop Lucy from commenting though. "Remember what I said. I want to see her alive."
"yes, ma'am…" Amy took the taser as well as the keys to the handcuffs.
"You bitch! Stay away from me!"
Really, Lucy, you think I would hurt you? A small smile escaped after locking the door.
"Put that down…don't come any closer! Pee...treeeee!"
With no one else around, she could finally show her true emotions. But at this moment, what she would like to do first is not kiss her but slap her.
"OWWW!"
Amy knows she's pretending because she didn't hit her that hard. "You know how I hated when you swear." It's true. She does and she also hated being called a bitch. Her smile slowly faded when Lucy turned her eyes away from hers. It hurts to see her ignoring her. It hurts to see that she has nothing to say after waiting for what seemed like 5 minutes. "I'm…sorry…" Amy said in a whisper, hoping that Lucy would turn to look at her but when she didn't, she apologized again with a kiss on her cheek followed by a hug, lowering her upper body against hers, putting her face near her ear. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…you were so upset…I didn't know what to do…" She prepared for this in her mind numerous times and now finally got a chance.
"Don't…"
Amy heard but continued, hoping she would understand why she lied, hoping to get her forgiveness.
"I don't want to hear your lies."
"…I'm not…"
"Stop it! I don't want to hear your lies!"
It's loud. It's clear. It's exactly what she had thought. Lucy was and still is trying to protect her. It's possible that Petrie could have planted a bug but Amy doubted because at this point it wouldn't make any difference if Petrie finds out. She never trusted me anyway. Taking the hint, Amy slipped into the other side of the bed. She's tired like the rest of them but how could she fall sleep with her lover lying next to her? How could she sleep with things unsettled between them? How could she sleep, knowing that this could be the last time that they will be together? So she waited and waited and waited, long enough to let others know that they're sleeping. Minutes passed, she couldn't wait any longer.
"I do love you."
Amy expected her to stop her from talking but is surprised that she didn't.
"I thought I never see you again." Thinking about that moment when she learned about the explosion elicited a sharp pain in her heart, causing tears to drown her eyes. "I'm sorry. I would never hurt you…you know that." She expected her to know why she tased her. She expected her to know her lies weren't intended to hurt her. "Lucy, please…" Shifting closer, she hung her right arm over her abdomen, just above the wound, her body snuggled closer against hers.
"…you…don't…love me."
Hearing the same words she once heard months ago broke her heart.
"Someday, you'll remember all of it…and you'll realize…you don't love me…you never have."
Without lights, with curtains drawn, she couldn't see Lucy's face clearly. But the last three words in which she spoke with feeling showed how painful it is just to say it.
"I didn't before but I do now. So even if I get my memory back, nothing will change because I know what I did. Why can't you understand that?"
"I don't blame you. I don't. I just wish you could remember...because everything will make more sense…bcuz now…I know why you didn't let me."
It's not the first time Amy heard of those reasons, the same ones she was told weeks ago. She may have been pretending years ago, but not now. "I wasn't pretending. I never was." She leaned down with the intention of kissing her lips but stopped when Lucy turned her head away. She didn't let that stop her though and continued with the kisses further down. Lifting Lucy's top up while ignoring her continuous request to stop, she pressed her lips on her upper chest, letting the tip of her tongue slide down, lightly nipping her skin towards her breast until she heard...
"You're not gay…."
Being reminded of the time she woke up from her coma, the time she remembered who she is, the time she accidentally sliced her arm with a fruit knife, the time she fainted when she found out that they're married, and that night she covered her mouth when their lips touched for the first time, she understood Lucy's intention for reminding her of that night. But that was then, this is now.
"Amy…don't…."
Ignoring her request, Amy tried to remove Lucy's shorts and underwear but Lucy didn't allow her to do so. "I didn't love you then, but I do now." Amy crawled on top of her lover and let her know what she was feeling that night. She's not gay but she did find her attractive. It's knowing who she is and what she did that disgusted her. Having that type of feeling for her was not possible in her mind, at least not then. She didn't find it repulsive to kiss her then so she certainly wouldn't feel that way now. Her face moved closer inch by inch and closed the gap between their mouths but was disappointed that Lucy again moved away after a few seconds.
"…Don't...they could be listening…"
"Then let them…"
"Amy, don't..."
Amy heard but continued to press tender kisses on her body and slid her hands down in areas where she knew Lucy wouldn't be able to resist, thus eventually giving in, allowing her shorts and underwear to be removed.
"This is real. This is who I am." Amy removed her own clothing, then crawled back on top and continued where she left off, riding her gently which elicited another soft moan from Lucy, then another and another. It's not the first time they made love this way, with her being on the top. But it's the first time a foreign object is being used, handcuffs. She might not be able to see Lucy's face clearly with the darkness in the room, but she could see eyes fixated at hers as she glided her hips against hers, she could hear her quick breathing as well as her own, she could feel her heart pounding against the palm of her hands. She thought she made her point until she saw Lucy's arms pulling as if trying to break free. What else do I need to do to make you understand? We're making love. We're having sex.
"Can't you feel it?" She should since she herself is all wet. "I'm not gay, but I love you."
She thought she made it clear the last time they made love since they did more than what they're doing now.
"I can't live without you."
She's not afraid to admit it because it's true. They made love before and usually she moans like everyone else who's in her position. But this time, she felt it's necessary to exaggerate a bit, not just to prove her point but also because she knows what it would do to Lucy. It drives her crazy. It drives her to the point where she wouldn't want to stop. It seems to be working because Lucy stopped asking her to stop and moving in synchronization with her. With the sounds of love making from both of them, there is no doubt in her mind that if someone is listening, they would know what they are doing. If they didn't before, they should now. "unnhh...unhhh..." Amy was pretending until she felt a sudden rush of heat. "unnhh..." As soon as she released hold of Lucy's wrists, she could see Lucy wanting to be un-cuffed. "Not now, later, okay?" Shifting herself into position, she continued pressing and gliding against the body underneath her, her movement became rapid along with her moaning and breathing, letting Lucy know what is happening to her by calling the Lord's name and hers. "unnhh..unhhh..unnhh.." Moving faster and faster, she then let out another soft long moan before gradually coming to a halt, letting Lucy know that she came before dropping her hot body down against hers.
"Do you think I'm still pretending?"
She shouldn't. She might not be able to use her hands but she should be able to feel the wetness between their warm bodies. If that doesn't work, she's not sure what will. After letting her body rest for a minute, Amy took the key from the table and opened the cuffs. The question she had previously is still there. Would she leave, now that she can? She could but only to get help. But she knows that's not what Lucy wants to do. Lucy would want to continue making love.
Part 2
With the warmth of the comfortable bed, with the fresh sweet scent of Hawaiian air flowing thru the slit of the window, and with her lover lying next to her, Amy was finally able to sleep well last night without the need of a small glass of wine. It might have only been 3 hours difference between LA and Lanai, but the events that took place the last few days especially last night exhausted her mind and body. She would have continued sleeping if not for the interruption. Her small smile faded, her eyes squinted and flickered. Snuggling close to her is Lucy with an arm hanging over her waist which she isn't surprised by. What surprised her is Jane standing next to the bed which caused her to immediately sit up, pulling the blanket over her body.
Brunch time is quiet. Everyone woke up later than usual due to the time difference except for Petrie who went out to get everything Lucy requested. Bobby and Jane are the only ones present. Amy continued on with her pretense and Lucy did too. Taking a seat across from Lucy, she noticed Jane's quick glance. The moment she returned the glance, Jane immediately looked down at her plate and continued eating her breakfast.
"Did anything happen last night?"
Why would he ask that? The only reason Bobby would ask is if Jane told him what she saw this morning.
"No"
The reply from Jane came so fast, Amy realized that she didn't. But regardless if she did or not, it wouldn't have made any difference because what Jane saw this morning is a fact. If it wasn't for Jane who woke her up, she would have continued sleeping in the warm comfortable bed with her lover next to her. If it wasn't for Jane who came in moments later after she slipped into bed last night, she would've had an opportunity to explain. She would've made love to Lucy to convince her that she can't live without her. That moment was what she needed to get their relationship back to where it was before. It would've worked. At least, it did in the dream.
"Where did you sleep?"
Amy again isn't sure why Bobby asked but could see guilt plastered on Jane's face which she understood why. Jane wasn't feeling guilty for ruining her moment but for failing to secure Lucy properly last night after giving her a bathroom break. When did that happen? Even she failed to notice when and how Lucy was able to get the cuffs off. This morning, she was so startled by Jane's presence, she had thought she forgot to lock the door, she had thought she was sleeping naked in bed but only came to realize what she thought happened last night actually did not.
"...with me."
Lucy, why did you tell him that? Now he's going to think everything I said is a lie.
"You slept with her?"
Did you think I was going to sleep on the floor? That wouldn't have been a logical explanation so she kept her mouth shut and wished Jane did too because her apology caused Bobby to ask another question.
"What happened?"
"Nothing." At least she didn't think anything happened since she didn't notice when Lucy had her arm around her.
"You're not still into her, are you Bobby?"
Lucy, if you don't want to get tased again, I suggest you stop trying to hurt his ego. What's the point of doing that?
"Stop it. What happened between us ended a long time ago. So I would appreciate it if you stop bringing that up."
She was expecting Bobby to say something but when he didn't, she felt the need to make him understand that it's over between them if he didn't already and to make Lucy to stop talking about it, whatever her intention is. Her comment may have captured everyone's attention but that didn't stop Lucy from talking about her. I'm a clean freak. What's the point of telling him that? Six pairs of eyes were staring at her as her personality was being described. Good things were also said about her, at least she saw it as good things. I'm cheap? Most people find not being materialistic is a good quality. Not spending thousands on a first class seat is not considered cheap. It's called saving money. I'm boring? Just because I don't like to go to night clubs doesn't make me boring. Not getting drunk doesn't mean I don't know how to have fun, it means I'm smarter than both of you. As her lifestyle and habits were being spilled out, Amy became even more confused when Bobby answered each question that Lucy asked. It got to the point where she felt the need to put a stop to it because Lucy was giving Bobby and Jane more details than she wanted them or anyone to know.
"Here, this tastes better!" Amy took the bowl of sliced pineapple, apple, mango and star fruit and placed it in front of her. God, what's wrong with you? Just because I won't get down on you doesn't mean I don't love you. Although she allowed Lucy to get down on her in her dream, she's not sure if she would have if last night had been real. She realized she might have misinterpreted and overreacted because everyone was staring at her as if she has two heads. You can't blame for me thinking that. One minute, Lucy was talking about her habit of having bed sheets washed at least once a month, the next she was comparing her to all her exes who liked to have fun, get loose, get down, and eat out.
"You're not still interested in her, are you?"
Looking at Bobby who hesitated on the question again, Amy wondered if he is. "That was a long time ago."
"good…cuz I wouldn't want to see you get hurt."
It sounded like an advice but he should know that it's a warning. Lucy, now he knows you're lying. Amy now understood her intention but didn't think it's necessary to warn him to stay away but later realized she again misinterpreted. Jane is listening with full attention. Bobby is too.
"She's not who you think she is."
Being looked at with 6 pairs of fixed eyes, Amy is more confused than before.
"She may look like your average girl next door, but you know…and I know…what she's capable of, everything she told you sounds like the truth…until you learn the truth…but even then, it might still be a lie…"
…Lucy…no…Amy wanted to say something but couldn't in front of Bobby and Jane. She regretted not pulling her into the bedroom to talk to her privately because Petrie, Danika and others came back an hour later.
What should have taken 2 hours to prepare took a lot longer because Lucy's tuxedo did not fit. Dressed in formal attire, Amy, Petrie, Jane and Bobby were waiting in the living room for Lucy to come out of the bedroom. Petrie again ran out of patience and yelled out the time every 15 minutes.
"Is she always this slow?"
Amy didn't see a point in answering the question so she just nodded once which it's partially true. But Petrie should know why she's taking this long. Once the door opened, everyone's attention was directed to the one stepping out, followed by Danika. Amy has seen her in disguise before so she isn't as surprised but everyone else is especially Petrie who took a few steps closer. The way she scanned her up and down, Amy didn't find anything wrong because Lucy did look like a man. With the haircut, the makeup, and beard, she looked unrecognizable.
"Ready?…"
"your voice?" Amy asked but was ignored. Without the voice changer, she might look like a man but her voice would give others the idea that she isn't.
Lucy walked pass her to the front and spoke with authority as if she's in charge.
"There will be metal detectors so no guns. No phones, no batteries, no electronics. You will be scanned and if they find anything on you, you will not be allowed to go in."
Everyone stood silent and turned towards Petrie for instructions.
"You've been there before?"
"No" Lucy said in a serious tone, letting Petrie know that she has been telling the truth. "I don't know who's going to be there. I don't know what is in there. What I do know is that a lot people died because of it. So…I'm warning you now…"
Her attitude is different from last night. She looks different. She sounds different. It's not the first time Amy saw this side of her, behaving like the one she learned about years ago.
"You still have a choice…"
Her eyes were directed at Bobby, then Jane, Danika, then Petrie, and lastly her. I'm not going to leave you.
"Bobby, you still have a choice. What is inside is not worth dying over."
Amy is surprised that Lucy is talking to Bobby in that concerned tone as if she cares.
"Jane, Danika, I don't know you but you're young and you girls reminded me of myself when I was younger. I didn't have a choice then. But you do…and you need to make a decision…now….for yourself, your family and everyone who loves you. Is this worth dying for?"
Lucy? Her motive became as clear as the blue Hawaiian sky from this morning. It seems that Lucy doesn't want anyone to go and not only her. No response came from Bobby, Jane, Danika or even Petrie whom she expected to say something to stop Lucy from trying to coerce her agents into quitting.
"Amy…"
I'm not going to leave you no matter what.
"I don't blame you."
I know that. Lucy.
"…because it's your job. You succeeded where no one else could."
I'm sorry I hurt you.
"You deserve respect, everyone should know what you did to make this world a better place, you deserve the highest honor for sacrificing yourself to save thousands of lives."
...Lucy...
"I…deserve to die."
No, you don't. Don't say that.
"…but you…do too…"
"What?"
"Don't ever…fuck…with anybody's feelings…"
What? It was clear before but now became as dark as the night sky. Standing rooted in her position, Amy, like the others, watched her as she walked towards the door. What she wants to do is have a private conversation with her but there is no time. As Petrie gave the orders for everyone to head out, she could only stare at Lucy while trying to make sense out of all this. Do you want me to go or don't you? But regardless, she never thought of leaving her. It's the last comment that caused her heart to ache because she could feel those words...came from her heart.