Hi guys I was bored and decided to release another special. Remeber that these don't have anything to do with the story, but they're so fun!
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Sir lance grabbed on to Alvina's tail, as instructed, and was sucked through time and space itself. He could see everything, what was and what will be. He could only feel a constant falling sensation, and after slamming into multiple objects that defied the laws of gravity he fell upon a soft surface. Laying there, breathing, he open his eyes and took hold of the hearth underneath him. He slowly stood to his feet, hands full of sand, as it slowly peeled off his armor. The Elite Knight looked around, he had lost his blade during his fall. The beach he had landed on extended from what looked like a gigantic archtree to another, and another in a never ending loop of sand and wood. It was like a long white bridge of sand, surrounded by clear blue water as far as the eye could see. The knight spotted his Zweihander sticking out of the sand in the distance.
The knight walked to his weapon, his weapon. The weapon that had gotten him out of so many dangerous situations, the weapon that had won him so many battles. He had started to notice that he was not alone on this stretch of sand. Man-sized clams with blade-like legs trailed behind him, the more closer he got to his blade the more appeared. He did what instinct told him to do, sprinted. Dodging clams from all directions, he reached his weapon. Upon picking it up he swung it around, cleaving four of his enemies in one devastating attack. The clams remaining slowed their advance, the dozen left circled the knight as he held his blade close to him. Leg by leg they attacked, Sir Lance attempted to counter but could only take a few out as his own blood began to cover his body from head to toe. He fell to his knees and was charged by a clam, he could only feel the shattering of his ribs as he suddenly wasn't able to feel the ground. He lost consciousness.
The knight awoke, he was on his back. His armor lay beside him… but he still wore his helmet. He lay by a bonfire, a warrior in eastern armor sat beside him.
"You got rekt n00b." said the easterner as he roasted a marshmallow in the bonfire. Sir Lance sat up, his body was surrounded in bandages.
"Wtf you saying, I totz had that!" he muttered as he reached for the bag of plastic that was filled with fluffy goodness and found himself a stick of his own.
The easterner concocted a s'more and smashed it into his mouth. He looked at Sir Lance, finally realizing that he still had his helmet on him. "I just realized… I wasn't able to remove your helmet when I was helping you… you hacking n04b?"
Sir Lance reached for his head, attempting to pull off his helmet. "No, I think the author was to0 st00p3d to create a face for me."
Fuck you Sir Lance! Was heard from the sky, causing the two to look up. Upon seeing nothing, they shrugged it off and continued their sweet feest.
"Wh0 are u?" said Sir Lance as he licked his fingers… through his helmet...
"I'm not telling ur casul a55, n08b." said the warrior from that one cardinal direction.
In the distance, the knight and the warrior were spotted by a figure on the beach, it started to sprint towards them.
"Wtf?!" said the both of them as an undead with a Mask of the Father, donning the armor of a giant, carrying a Zweihander and a grass crest shield of his own, approached the two. It yelled like a madman as it started to wave its' weapon back and forth… it looked in-human.
"Well, what is it?" yelled the eastern warrior as the beast approached him and immediately flattened him with its' weapon.
"THE LEGEND NEVER DIES!" yelled the noob with the overpowered (and overused) build.
"Fuck d00d lemme finish my s'm0res!" said Sir Lance as he scrambled to his feet. His armor teleported from the sand to his body rapidly, and his Zweihander soon followed. Why the fuck couldn't I do that earlier, lol? He wondered to himself. A gigantic "Fuck you" made of clouds appeared in the sky.
The Legend charged Sir Lance, bringing his erotic piece of metal down upon his opponent. Sir Lance dodged to the left and thrusted his sword forward, stabbing his foe in the arm.
"ARGH YOU PHUCKING STABBED ME! WTF… I'M BLE3DING!" yelled the giant-daddy as blood spurted from his arm.
"Get rekt." said Sir Lance.
"ARGHSETPIOAWHEHLAKSN" Yelled the legend as he prepared his R2.
Sir Lance smiled from behind his helmet and swatted the attack to the side with his left hand as it rushed downwards. All of the force was magically transferred to the left as the foe completely lost control of himself. Sir Lance thrust his Zweihander into the legend as an unrealistic amount of blood poured out and covered the knight in red.
"Get rekt."