Dedicated to the loving memory of my cousin, Heather who was cruelly torn from our lives today. We have lost a dear soul but heaven has gained an angel xxx
"What are we going to do with all this wood?" Horatio asked as he picked another piece up and placed it on the ever growing pile in the corner of the room.
"I have a use for it; once we've sorted in here we'll take it back to the car and put it in the trunk"
"What are you planning to do with it?" he asked, eyeing Jeff warily.
"You'll see" the other man replied vaguely.
Horatio shook his head and made a start on the sideboards, picking up the larger pieces of plasterboard and putting them in heavy duty trash bags. As he moved one particular piece he found his keys and wallet covered in dust, he picked them up and blew the dirt off of them before placing them in his trouser pocket. He picked up a broom and began sweeping the dust from the floor, his still-healing hands protested at the repetitive movements but he used it to focus his mind and avoid reliving the memories of last Friday night.
Not much was said between the two men as they went about clearing the kitchen, Jeff spent most of his time observing Horatio out the corner of his eye. To the untrained, most people would see his sullen behaviour as sulking but Jeff knew him better, he was brooding and contemplating what had happened in the house. Horatio's silence was a sure sign that he was lost in his thoughts, he was a highly intelligent man that could come to his own conclusions quite easily when he was thinking straight, now that he was back on the right track it was just a case of nudging him in the right direction every so often until he figured out things for himself. The man might not figure it out straight away but in time he would come to realise why Jeff had brought him here, he hoped that Horatio would come to the conclusion that all that was broken was just furniture that could be fixed or replaced. He needed him to understand that his life too, with a little bit of time and effort could be fixed too.
"I think we've done as much as we can do" Jeff said some time later, the kitchen certainly looked in a lot better state than when they started. It would need re-plastering, painting and new furniture but it looked habitable for now. "Let's go and have a look at the next room" he said as he walked through the hallway and in to the lounge. He let out a low whistle as he took in the scene, much like the kitchen the lounge was covered in dust and plasterboard, and a coffee table lay broken and battered in the middle of the room.
Horatio followed awkwardly in to the room, he took a quick glance around and then hung his head, once more embarrassed by his actions. Jeff lifted a large piece of wood and found a flat screen TV underneath it; it was dusty but looked like it had come through the carnage relatively unscathed. "God job you didn't put your fist through this beauty" Jeff observed as he gave the other man a smile. Seeing the broken coffee table he picked a piece of it up, "This looks like solid oak. You must have put some real force behind your blows to do this to it"
He could feel his hackles rising, wasn't it enough that Jeff had brought him here to relive his foolish actions? Why couldn't the man just get on with tidying up without making such stupid comments? "Are we carrying out a post mortem on the coffee table or are we tidying up?" he snapped, becoming tired of Jeff's endless observations.
"Sorry" the other man said as he went about collecting the remnants of the coffee table and placing the large pieces in the hallway, "Guess I've spent too much time around Alex, she's rubbing off on me"
Horatio took a deep breath and tried to get himself under control, "Whatever. Can we please just get on with it?" He didn't wait to hear the response as he stalked over to the other side of the room and started picking things up, he placed objects back on shelves that weren't broken and threw the things that were in to the trash bag in his hand. His hand stilled as he came across a framed photo of him and Ray Jr, he smiled wistfully at it before frowning and placing it back on the mantelpiece.
"You miss them, don't you?" Jeff's voice almost made him jump but served to pull him from his reverie.
He carried on picking framed pictures up off the floor, placing the ones that weren't broken back on the wall or on the shelves they belonged on. Pictures of his mother, brother, the team at the lab and his dear, sweet Marisol. He closed his eyes as another wave of regret and guilt washed through him. He finally spoke, "Yes. I do"
"They're memories of the past, you can't keep living in it. You need to make the most of the time you have now, life's too short to sit around and wait for things to come to you"
"What are you insinuating?"
"I'm not insinuating anything, merely trying to point out that you need to work out what is precious to you and keep hold of it before it slips away"
Deep down he knew Jeff was right, had he seen the way he looked at Calleigh? Had he figured out what had happened the other night, did Calleigh tell him this morning? He wasn't sure so he decided to keep his mouth shut, figuring that Jeff would make the assumption sooner or later. He preferred later.
Once the downstairs had been tidied Horatio led Jeff upstairs to the bathroom, he let the other man enter first. "Wow, that's a lot of blood. And a lot of glass" Horatio said nothing and merely shrugged his shoulders as he stood awkwardly in the doorway. "Looks like you took most of your rage out on the mirror. I'm guessing you didn't like what was reflected back at you"
He struggled to find the right words, "I just saw a pathetic excuse for a man. I couldn't stand to see that face staring back at me anymore"
"Looks like you tried to put your head through it too" the other man observed, aware that he was making Horatio deeply uncomfortable.
"My head was spinning; I couldn't get the images or the voices out. The pain was a good distraction"
Jeff fingered a deep forehead-shaped dent in the wall, "I'm surprised you didn't fracture your skull with the force you put behind it"
He smirked at that, "It's been said that I'm extremely hard-headed, guess it came in useful this time"
Jeff turned to look at him, "Did it though? Did it get rid of the voices and the images?"
He shook his head sadly, "No. I'd just lost it, I couldn't help myself"
"Like I said the other day Horatio, you need to find an outlet for some of your frustration. Have you thought any more about jogging again?"
"Yes. I was going to ask Calleigh over dinner this evening if she'd like to join me" He felt awkward saying it, what if she said no?
The other man smiled brightly at him and clapped him on the shoulder, "Great, it'll do you good"
Over the next hour the two men set about cleaning up the bathroom, once it was done Horatio sat on his bed and picked up the cell phone lying on the bedside cabinet. He opened the phone and pressed the power button, he frowned when the screen remained blank until it occurred to him that the battery was probably dead. He stood and placed it in his pocket before making his way downstairs, Jeff had already begun placing the trash bags outside for collection and motioned at Horatio to start placing the wood in the car.
A few minutes later Jeff joined him in the hallway to collect the last of the wood; he turned to Horatio as he walked out the door. "It's nearly lunchtime, fancy getting something to eat?"
His first answer would have been "No" but he was beginning to feel hungrier than he had in days, his appetite coming back with a vengeance, "Sure, why not" he answered as he locked the door behind him, making sure that he collected his laptop on the way out.