Here goes anotha chapie^^ Hope you guys enjoy^^ Please R&R, thankies^^
CHAPTER THIRTY FIVE
- Renunciation, betrayal and a sudden confession -
The next day, Kakashi's deadline was approaching with fatal steps. Over night I thought about some options and concluded with one. I need to leave the crew and take Kakashi with me.
I discussed with Gin about the things Kakashi told me and it was written all over his face that he wanted to avoid any confrontation whatsoever with any shinobi countries. It was the first time in four weeks that I've witnessed such an anxious face and it told me it was best for me to leave before I lead the entire crew to its grave. The decision was difficult; I grew very attached to this crew. I could for once act normally without fearing to be rejected or sent to prison. It was a month of bliss, although their negative influence was passed on to me and not to forget their habits as well. However I was grateful that they could teach me to perceive people's intentions and execute in the right second an action that could either overthrow the person or play along.
I slowly began to realize that my presence in the Naruto world was the sole purpose for my development, to become stronger and see the world in another light.
Anyway enough with the reminiscing or with the contemplation, I still had to finish up some business before leaving this world and first of all it was to leave the gang and bring Kakashi away from here. However things turn out to be worse than expected.
When I went to look for Kakashi in the place where he was supposed to be tied up, I found the shackles on the floor and Kakashi gone. I shouted on top of my lungs, demanding for the whereabouts of the prisoner. Nearly half of the crew ran down at my command.
"Where is the prisoner!" I demanded with impatience and growing anger.
The crew exchanged anxious looks, either fearing to answer or hoping that a miracle would happen that could spare them. I eyed them threateningly and I raised my hand revealing the electricity zapping in my hand.
"Tell me, or I'll roast you all." I glowered ferociously and the crew recoiled fearfully and pushed one guy forth to answer the question.
The guy looked at his companion with a face of I-thought-you-were-my-friends and looked back at me nervously.
"Mizuno Sama, don't get angry at us, but, Gin Sama, he uhm, well he took the prisoner."
"WHAT?!"
Scared by my outburst he continued with an anxious and alarmed voice.
"He made us swear not to tell you anything-
-For what?!" I demanded, interrupting him sharply and the guy who shivered at my ferociousness, continued.
"He took the prisoner outside to-to-to, Uhm, like he said to "play around with"."
I couldn't believe what I heard and I rushed passed them with a groan. I dashed up the path arriving to the main room of the cavern and turned sharply to the exit of the cave. I burst out into the blazing sun and on to the creaking jagged rocks that were mercilessly battered by the waves. I hopped onto each sharp boulder, climbing my way up to solid and smooth ground. When I arrived there into lush vegetation, I spotted a great distance away Gin and Kakashi on the calm ocean surface ready to confront each other, however Kakashi appeared still shaken and he had one knee resting on the surface. Gin appeared firm and ready to battle. I didn't know that Gin could float on water. I got up and marched boldly and furiously to the ocean. I was ready to shout, but contained it when I saw Gin talking and Kakashi not reacting to it.
All of a sudden I saw Gin executing a technique with his fingers and instantly I recognized it was a water technique. Kakashi stared down into the ocean, ignorant of what Gin was doing. Water started to collect in the air in front of Gin; it grew and grew shaping itself into a gigantic cube. I feared the outcome of the technique, because Gin required a lot of chakara and skill to shape it into a geometrical figure.
Furiously and desperately I vanished from my spot, praying for the water to help me. The enormous cube hovered higher and levitated over Kakashi, casting down a big squared shadow. Regardless of that Kakashi did not budge; he kneeled there waiting to be butchered.
The cube dropped and with a loud boom of an explosion, the cube clashed against something that sounded harder than steal. The cube gradually dissolved letting the water cascade like strong heavy rain on this unfamiliar and foreign thing. A force field made of water capsulated Kakashi, while I stood firmly with my hands raised above my head holding and controlling that force field. Kakashi reacted by spilling out a disbelieved "huh?"
"You are dishonouring your name! You have tainted your title as one of the strongest shinobis of Konoha! Do you think a proud Konoha shinobi would let himself get killed by someone who's weaker than him?!" I scolded Kakashi without paying attention to him and keeping the force field up.
"I don't care about anything anymore. I am a disgrace; death seems to be the only solution to redeem my mistake." He uttered melancholically and I scoffed with absurdity at his statement.
"What the hell are you babbling about? Do you think that girl would be happy to hear this? Do you think she would be happy to see you acting like a wimp and sacrificing yourself to your enemy?" I scolded him sharply, but he reacted back equally angry.
"You don't understand, because you don't know anything! I've killed an innocent and caring woman, who was the ONLY person that I cared about!"
My heart squeezed with a start, trapping my voice and the oxygen. It startled me so much what he said about me and I remained disbelieved. I wanted to jump into his arms, hug him and kiss him and tell him I was here. I bit my trembling lip to contain myself, I couldn't do this, and I must focus! I lowered my head, smiling melancholy to myself.
"I also lost someone…" I uttered and I could feel that Kakashi was calming himself down, "I can tell you, if I had taken my life only because of him, he would have cursed me in the life after that anyway…You have to go on with your life and die according to the law of nature or after a fulfil life."
Kakashi was silent but I could feel his stare on me, I just hoped he didn't find out it was me. Then I took a determined air and told him.
"I'll help you escape without risking us to resort into a battle."
I lowered my arms and the force field lowered itself at the same time. Gin met me with surprised and a disbelieved face. He knew I could manipulate electricity but not water.
"Mizuno what's going on and why can you-
-manipulate water?" I finished his sentence for him and let the water carry me over to Gin.
He watched me with disbelief that he could barely speak. I stopped when I was close enough to him.
"It's a skill that I kept secret from you because I was insecure how to use it. What were you doing with the prisoner?!" I told him with a serious tone.
"I wanted to get rid of him so that my crew is spared from the Anbu's." he declared and I shook my head with absurdity.
"Do you think by killing him, it will solve the problem? On the contrary it'll make it worse! Hatake Kakashi is renowned for being a top elite shinobi, if he gets killed HERE whole Konoha will be on our back and do you want that?"
Gin realized his mistake and expressed some frustration with a groan.
"What should we do then?" he exclaimed with desperation and infuriation.
I gave Gin a defeated smile.
"I'll take care of it. You just go back to our crew and stay hidden."
"What? What do you mean, Mi..!"
I abruptly hugged him and he instantly became silent and I whispered so that Kakashi couldn't hear.
"Gin, they are looking for me and if I leave I can draw their attention away from the crew and you."
"You are giving yourself to THEM?!" he protested with disaccord, but I silenced him once again by placing my fingers on his lips.
"Please, don't make it difficult for me. It's the best that I leave; anyway they are looking for me and not for you and your crew. Hide yourselves well and keep quiet for several days."
"I refuse to let you do this!" he protested and removed my hand and held it carefully.
"Please, Gin, it's the only way, you have to let me go." I pleaded in a whisper.
He searched in my eyes to check if I was lying or not being serious. He gave in with a hopeless sigh and removed my arms and turned his back on me.
"Go ahead, leave before I change my mind." He said in a firm voice.
"Gin…Thank you for every thing." I expressed my gratitude with sincerity and turned away from him and walked back to Kakashi, who was back on his feet again appearing less troubled than before.
"Stay close and don't move." I told Kakashi and turned my back.
The water began to tremble and become wild under our feet. I focused my chakara unto my soles, letting it spread and graft into the water. In a brusque lurch, a disk of water lifted from the ocean and floated higher and higher in the sky.
"Whatever you do, keep the chakara continuously circulating in your soles otherwise you'll drop through and well, I won't be able to save you." I warned Kakashi who was so surprised by the whole thing that he didn't utter a word.
The place that I scooped out the water filled itself with a crash and I hovered with a disk shaped piece of water underneath my feet. Gin had turned around observed this with fascination.
"Gin, take care of the crew and I swear on all your heads and on the sea bandit code that I won't betray you. If you don't believe me wait for several days and if you weren't attacked by than, that is the proof of my loyalty." I pledged with earnest to Gin and he gave me an amused smirk.
"And you take good care of yourself and do what you feel is right."
I nodded with determination and waved at him.
"Farewell Gin, thank you for everything." I said and gave a last grateful glance at him and flew away.
It was the last time that I ever was going to see him. This man will remain forever in my heart as one of my closest friends and great older brother.
"Where are you heading?" I asked Kakashi.
"To Konoha, this way, to the North." He pointed with his arm and I nodded.
"Good, now hold on to me, it's going to be a bumpy ride." I told him and he placed his hands on my waist and moved a bit closer behind me.
I felt he was ready and without further a due we soared through the sky, over the sparkling blue ocean. Kakashi was torn back by the sudden impact that he reflexively clung his arms around my waist. I had to smile to myself and I steered this thing like a floating surf board.
"You have to give me the directions where to go, okay?" I called over the loud and rushing sound back to Kakashi.
"Okay, I will." He shouted back.
We kept soaring and soaring higher until we crossed the ocean and were flying over the forest. The wind was on our side helping us to go further and further.
The trip took an hour long until I started feeling the side effects. We came to a sudden halt when I dropped to my knees, Kakashi instantly checked if I was alright.
"Are you okay?"
I panted heavily feeling worn out from using so much chakara.
"Damn it, it uses so much chakara!" I cursed through clenched teeth and I could see the water dripping from my disk and the layer was becoming thinner and thinner.
"You should drop me off somewhere…Ah over there!" he indicated and I spotted an open space.
I bit my lip and persevered, moving us over the trees and lowering us down into an open space in the middle of the forest. I brought us down gently depositing us on the forest ground. It was a grassy field which led to another dense forest. I recognized it instantly.
It was the typical Konoha forest; I didn't expect that we would already be here. I released a breath of relief after finding solid ground. Kakashi came over and rested his hand on my shoulder.
"You didn't have to do that, but thanks anyway." He thanked me kindly and I responded calmly.
"It was a pleasure."
I did some breathing exercise to regain my energy and Kakashi still had his hand resting on my shoulder and he kneeled down to me, showing concern.
"Are you sure you are okay?"
"Yea, yea, I just need to rest a bit; after all such a jutsu takes up so much chakara." I reassured him calmly.
"I guess this ability is hereditary, right?" supposed Kakashi and I nodded without responding.
There was a moment of silence and then I got up and walked some steps forward and stopped.
"I gotta go, need to visit an old friend of mine."
"In Konoha?"
I simply nodded at his assumption.
"If I don't show any signs that I survived, he surely will keep on grieving about me and I don't think my heart would be able to bear this any longer." I told Kakashi with regret and melancholy.
"I realized he gets angry over my carelessness and stubbornness, but I was just too stupid and blind to realize that he does care about me. And yet I manage to hurt him even more through lying and pretences, what a great person I am… Even though he taught me so much - he must think that I never grasped his words. If he knew how much I cherished his words, I'm sure we wouldn't be in such bad terms."
I raised my hand to my mask, grasped it and threw it on the ground so that it shattered into pieces.
"I hope he can still forgive me, for all my foolishness, indifference and ignorance that made his life so difficult. I never meant to hurt him, when… He's such an important person to me."
There was a brief pause, I didn't know how Kakashi was reacting to this or whether he was listening, but it was time to show myself to him. Even if he'll hate me, I have to confront the truth no matter how much it hurts.
I pulled out the elastic that tied my hair and I turned around and a gust of wind blew my blond locks in my face. With an affectionate smile, I encountered Kakashi.
"Long time no see, Kakashi." I greeted him with warmth and with my fingers pushing some hair behind my ears.
Kakashi stood there, staring wide-eyed with disbelief like he was seeing a ghost. The gust of wind that rustled the leaves deafened any other sound produced around us. He raised his trembling hands and treaded heavily towards me, he was in state of confusion, uncertain if I was a mere illusion. He stopped in front of me; he raised his trembling hands hesitatingly and cupped my cheeks.
His thumbs brushed over my cheeks, nose and lips to check if I was real. His uncovered eye sparkled, overcome by emotions and he engulfed me in an overwhelming embrace with his one hand driving through my hair and his emotional voice cracking:
"You are still alive, thank God, thank God!" he whispered with immense relief with an emotional tangled voice.
He held me so tightly, determined not to let me go ever again. I was so moved by his reaction that tears were brimming in my eyes. My arms crept over his broad back and I returned the hug, equally overwhelmed. I closed my eyes to bathe in this moment of bliss. It was like the time had stopped for us, nothing in the world could separate us now.
However he pulled brusquely away revealing an indifferent expression that gave my body an icy shiver and made my heart sink to my stomach. I sensed that something terrible was going to happen. He backed away from me and all of a sudden I was surrounded by an Anbu squad, which pointed their kunais menacingly at me. One Anbu appeared in front of Kakashi, who seemed to be the leader.
"Well done Kakashi sempai, she survived after all, Hokage Sama will be pleased."
I listened to this with horror.
"Huh?! Kakashi what does he mean?" I demanded, but my wrists were brutally forced against my back to shut me up and I gave out a painfully gasp.
Kakashi didn't pay attention to me anymore, instead he directed the leader of the Anbu further away from us to discuss about something. Dread flooded my entire system, what was going on, what's the meaning of this?! There was a brief discussion between Kakashi and the captain of the Anbu squad. I couldn't hear a word they said but finally they came back to us. The captain announced:
"This girl is a threat; we must bring her back to Konoha alive. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir!" all shouted in unison and were in motion, but I shouted.
"Wait! Kakashi! What's the meaning of this?"
Regardless of my demands they motioned themselves into the direction in which they were heading to, but all of a sudden a shout came from Kakashi.
"Wait!"
The Anbus halted and Kakashi walked over in front of me, his hands were in his pockets and he looked at me with his cold eyes and indifferent attitude.
"I think I owe you an explanation, which I am willing to give anyway. From here on you are considered as an escaped captive and walking threat to the shinobi society."
"But why? I didn't do any harm? I just accomplished the mission as ordered!"
Kakashi huffed with ridicule.
"All of this, my personal training with you, was just an experiment to see whether or not you were a threat. Considering the fact of your possession of a demon and manipulation of water, electricity and your ability to heal and your flight to seek refuge in the sea bandit gang, you do pose a threat to Konoha, which means you need to be locked away."
"What? But since when was I-
-A captive? Well Sara, didn't you know that since the very beginning? My second mission underneath training you was to report to Tsunade anything suspicious about you and let me tell you I found a lot, enough to prove that you are a threat and even a spy."
"But damn it, I am not a spy! Didn't I prove to y'all that I wasn't! I wiped out the entire Fuhei clan and destroyed the demon, doesn't it prove my loyalty to Konoha?!"
Kakashi shook his head, still keeping his cold face.
"Like I told you, it was only an experiment to see whether or not you were a threat. Do you think Konoha is stupid enough to let in a foreigner that denies its identity and origin and lets that individual train and live freely in our village? Of course not! Konoha launches a full scale espionage against foreigners that's why we have limited foreigners in our village."
"Kakashi, that's unjustified! You have many proofs that contradict those beliefs, why don't you tell them!"
Kakashi took a deep breath and eyed me sharply.
"I only care about what I witness nothing else."
I couldn't believe any of this, it must be wrong, it must be a lie! Than what were all the nice moments... Pictures flashed in my mind where we laughed and talked, embraced, kissed and when were so close to each other. All of the memories cracked as if somebody kept on smashing against a thin surface.
"So, all of this...Was a lie?" I uttered hurtfully and stared at Kakashi.
"It's part of the job. In order to get some information, I needed to act."
I breathed quickly overwhelmed by this unbearable reality.
"It's not true! It's not true! YOU LIAR!! ALL THESE MOMENTS WERE REAL, I KNOW THEY WERE!" I bellowed with such anguish that the tears spilled down my cheeks and I struggled to break free from the Anbus.
Kakashi scoffed.
"Have you forgotten? We are shinobis, trained to deceive enemies and capture them. Haven't you learned that from your mission, Sara? When you acted as Ronen's bride- to-be?"
The memory of Ronen stabbed me in the heart; I bit my trembling lip remembering the pain and bitterness from the event.
"You are so naïve and weak minded in believing that Konoha would actually accept you and train you. How could they accept you, if you aren't a shinobi and more precisely a foreigner from a distant world?" He jeered and turned his back on me.
"Take her away." He ordered.
It was like being rammed by a knife. The cracks, shattered and showered over the floor, leaving me in the dark, feeling shamefully bare and dreadfully alone and horribly misused. The reality was too much to bear, everything was a lie and I was once again misused and abandoned in the darkness. Kakashi betrayed me…Kakashi betrayed me…Kakashi betrayed me…KAKASHI BETRAYED ME AND HANDED ME OVER TO THE KONOHA GOVERNMENT!
Overwhelmed by these emotions, the electricity zapped around my body and I released a strong voltage, propelling the Anbus away. I didn't care the slightest what I did, it was my last chance, and I must tell him before it's too late! I ran to him and clasped my arms around his stomach, embracing him tightly from behind. I sobbed in the back of his vest, gripping the front of his vest with trembling hands.
"I must tell you…My heart cannot bear it any longer! I've been trying to hide it and tried lying to myself that it wasn't true, but at every second of the day those feelings grow stronger that it hurts…"
I bit my lip to stop myself from sobbing so much, my feelings were pulsing through me and the words just burst out of my mouth.
"Hatake Kakashi! I love you! I loved you since the very beginning!" I confessed with such clarity and power that it echoed over the forest and stunned any noise that surrounded us.
I finally said it, after holding it secret and letting it grow and grow to becoming painful, it was finally out!
Kakashi was completely silent and was frozen stiff. I was too distraught to identify his mood only that his silent behaviour seemed to be giving me some hope. However I was deceived, when he responded abruptly:
"That's cute, but I feel the exact opposite for you, you were just a burden since the beginning!"
I froze stiff and my arms dropped down my sides, even more tears sprung from my eyes and I stared blankly with shock in front of me. His words rung in my ears, burdening me as the seconds passed and the tone of his voice stabbed my heart.
"You wasted enough time already, I'll end this." He mentioned and vanished in front of my eyes and reappeared behind me.
Too overwhelmed by my emotions, he struck me in the back of my neck and I fell back against him, losing my sense of balance and with my senses numbing and fading. I felt a last powerful gust of wind, blowing over us, created a moment between us two and Kakashi's voice whispered in my ear.
"Thank you, Sara." His voice was gentle and fading and before I could distinguish any further, I fell deeper and deeper into the cold and dark bottomless abyss of unconsciousness.