Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha.
Title - Flawless
Summary - He didn't ask for this! He was forced to stay at his shrink's house. And worst of all, he hates her 'perfect' daughter. So why does he feel attracted to her?
Genre - Romance/Humor
Chapter 35: Control
Dr. Higurashi's eyes widen when she just heard what her daughter also heard.
"Inuyasha is in the hospital."
Her eyes quickly searched for her daughter.
"Kagome . . ."
The young woman's color drained and her breathing was starting to get shallow.
"H-hospital?" she whispered in pure shock, staring into nothing.
"Kagome!" Dr. Higurashi called out. "Kagome!"
Kagome slowly looked at her mother, however she wasn't looking at her mother. It was like she was staring pass her.
"Hospital?" she whispered again.
Dr. Higurashi immediately looked at Souta who was still holding the phone and staring at his sister.
"Souta, give me the name of the hospital," she ordered.
"Sango, hospital?" he said urgently. He looked at his mom. "Faith hospital."
Dr. Higurashi nodded and looked back at Kagome. She slammed her hands on the table and snapped her fingers. "Kagome!" she called out.
"Sango, I'll call you back," Souta whispered, hanging up.
"Kagome!" Dr. Higurashi called out again.
Kagome stumbled backwards and landed on the wall. Her breathing turning into panting. Her hands fisted together on her chest. She gulped.
'You are worthless.'
"Kagome! Look at me!" Dr. Higurashi called.
'You are stupid.'
"Kagome?" Souta whispered. He wanted to touch her but he was too afraid.
'Noone wants you. You're only a toy. Noone will take you seriously.'
"Kagome!" Dr. Higurashi walked around the table and grabbed her daughter by the shoulders, giving her a good shake.
Kagome gasped and her bulged eyes were on her mother. She felt her body tremble.
"Snap out of it," Dr. Higurashi said firmly.
Kagome eyes roamed around the kitchen and her harsh breathing was uncontrollable.
"Kagome!"
Kagome's head snapped back and stared right into her mother's hard eyes.
"I told you," her mother said quietly with a tight jaw, gripping onto her daughter's shoulders even more.
Then Kagome looked pass her mother.
'You are worthless.'
"Kagome! God dammit! Snap out of it!" Dr. Higurashi kept yelling, shaking the young girl.
Souta flinched when his mother yelled and clutched onto the phone.
Kagome's eyes were still in the same state.
'You are stupid.'
Her eyes started to burn. Her vision started to get cloudy with the tears forming. Her hands started to shake. Her heart beat began to fasten. Her breathing turned into panting.
"I'm not worthless," she whispered, almost inaudible.
"Kagome, please!" Her mother begged.
"I'm not stupid," she whispered again.
The older woman continued to shake the younger one. "Please!"
"Kagome . . ."Souta whispered.
"I'm not stupid!" Kagome yelled, tears falling down her cheeks. "I'm not worthless!"
"Kagome! Snap out of it!" Dr. Higurashi yelled.
Kagome looked at her mother anxiously. "I'm not, right?" A small smile crept on her lips. "I'm not! Everyone loves me! I have everything! I can get any guy and every girl wishes to be me! I get the good grades! I can get anything I want! Right?" Her voice started to get louder. "Right?"
Dr. Higurashi's eyes softened. Souta felt tears falling down his cheek. He hated seeing his sister like this.
Kagome body looked like it trembled, and her eyes were bulged out. She looked like a troubled metal patient. Tears kept running down her cheeks, and she began to sob quietly.
"Right? Everyone loves me!" she cried. "I'm flawless, right? Mother?"
"Kagome . . ." Dr. Higurashi took a step back and let go of her daughter.
Kagome's brows furrowed and looked at her mother with the same anxious, nervous expression. "Why are you moving away? Don't you love me anymore?" she said softly.
A small sob was heard.
Kagome tilted her head to her brother stood, sobbing. "What's wrong Souta? Are you scared?" She extended her arms out. "It's okay," she said sweetly. "I'm here."
"Kagome . . ." Souta sobbed. "Please stop."
Kagome's expression faltered and she looked at her hands like she just realized something. She hesitantly looked back at her mother, and wiped her eyes furiously.
"I'm fine, right? Mother? I'm fine?" she asked softly.
No answer.
"Mother?" Her voice began to sound nervous. "Mother? I'm fine, right? I'm the perfect girl everyone loves, right? The one that everyone wishes to be? Remember?"
Dr. Higurashi looked away ashamed. "Kagome . .."
"Remember? You said that everyone will always love me if I was flawless. I'm wanted by everyone, right?"
Dr. Higurashi closed her eyes painfully.
"Mother?"
SLAP!
Souta's eyes bulged out as he stood there with his heart beating fast. He hates this.
Kagome stood there frozen. She let the stinging sensation linger on her cheek as she stared in shock at her mother.
"Stop this!" Dr. Higurashi demanded. She grabbed onto her daughter's shoulders. "Listen to me, please. Inuyasha is in the hospital. We're going to the hospital, Kagome. We need to know if he's okay," she said firmly.
Kagome's eyes widen again. She shrugged off her mother's hands on her and looked at her with furrowed brows. Then she looked at the floor.
"I don't think I can go," she whispered softly.
Dr. Higurashi sighed and rubbed her temples. "Kagome, you have to," she said in a tired tone.
"Why?" Kagome snapped. "Why?"
Dr. Higurashi's face softened. "You want to prove to me that you can't pretend," she spoke softly."Then go."
Kagome began to sob uncontrollably. "I can't!" she cried.
"Sis," Souta plead in a whisper. "Please."
Kagome fisted her hair and leaned into the wall behind her. "I'm scared! I keep remembering!"
"Then you're not ready to stop pretending," Dr. Higurashi stated. She sighed and shook her head. She looked at Souta. "Come on. We'll go to the hospital and see if your hanyou friend is fine," she simply said.
"But Kagome-"
"Now!" Dr. Higurashi ordered.
Souta ran to get his coat and was soon waiting by the door.
Dr. Higurashi looked at Kagome. "I did tell you, Kagome," she said and she walked out of the house with Souta.
Kagome stood there for a few moments before sliding down against the wall. She hugged her knees and brought them to her chest. She started rocking back and forth.
"I'm flawless. Everyone would want me," she whispered to herself.
'Do you really believe life is like a fairytale, Kagome?'
Kagome began to breathe harshly again.
'You always complain about everything!'
She shook her head. 'Stop it!' she begged.
'Nothing is good enough for you.'
'Please stop!'
'In reality, you're not good enough for anything.'
Kagome let out a loud scream as she grabbed fistful of her hair. "Please stop it! I didn't do anything! I didn't! Why do you hate me so much?" she cried. "What did I do wrong for you to hate me?"
She sobbed silently to herself. She rocked back and forth, trying to comfort herself.
"Why do you hate me?"
"Sango! Miroku!"
The couple lifted their heads as they heard their names called out.
"Souta?" Sango said, standing up from the chair along with her boyfriend.
"Dr. Higurashi?" Miroku whispered in disbelief.
"Sango. Miroku." This was the usual greeting the older woman gave. The usual name and their name.
"Hello, Dr. Higurashi," Sango greeted, shaking her hand. Her eyes softened. "Kagome . . .?"
Dr. Higurashi sighed and gave Sango an apologetic look. "I'm sorry. She's not . . . you know."
Sango's head hung. "I see," she said quietly.
"What happened to him?" Dr. Higurashi asked.
"He was coming back home when he was attacked," Miroku explained.
"Attacked?" Dr. Higurashi raised a brow.
Miroku shrugged. "This is all I know. I'm not certain who or how."
"Dammit!"
The teens turned when they heard a familiar voice.
"Kouga, he's gonna be okay," Ayame said soothingly as the couple walked back from god knows where.
"Kouga? What happened?" Souta asked.
Kouga waved at Souta with a weak smile and sighed. Then he looked at Dr. Higurashi with curiosity. She was looking at him, too.
"And you are?" she said.
"Kouga Lin," he said, shaking her hand.
Dr. Higurashi nodded. "So you're the other one besides Inuyasha," she said.
"You're Kagome's mother, aren't you?" Kouga said.
She nodded.
"What's going on? What does she mean the other one besides Inuyasha?" Sango questioned, looking a the two people in confusion.
"Don't worry about it," Kouga said.
"I asked a question here?" Souta spoke up. "What happened?"
Kouga sighed. "The idiot got trashed by some demons," he said with a frown.
"Why would they beat him up? Did Inuyasha do something to them?" Miroku asked.
"It looks like Hojo found out about our little prank and decided to get even. I just didn't know he would go this far," Kouga growled.
"How's his condition?" Miroku asked.
Kouga's expression softened. "He's just in a small coma right now," he said. "But I know he'll manage. He's been through worse."
"Oh no," Sango whispered. Miroku held her.
"Dammit!" Souta hissed.
"Where's Kagome?" Ayame asked.
Sango, Miroku, and Souta averted eyes.
"She's at home. But I believe I need an explanation," Dr. Higurashi said firmly. "Hojo?"
"This is gonna be a long story . . ." Kouga sighed.
'You depend on everyone and that makes you weak.'
Tears ran down slowly on sticky cheeks.
'Noone wants a weak girl like you.'
Blue eyes looked emotionless.
'You never do anything right.'
Soft hiccups were heard in the quiet room.
'You complain. You never do anything right. You're just a disaster.'
Her heart pounded fast and heavy.
'You're spoiled, too.'
"Shut up," she whispered in a hollow tone.
'And you look just like her as well.'
"I'm not her." She closed her eyes slowly.
'You starting to act like her, too.'
She wiped her eyes with her delicate fingers.
'And I'm have to take you away from her.'
"It was never like that."
'She isn't what she seems to be. She's a fraud and she'll turn you in one, too.'
"No."
'I'll help you.'
"Shut up!" Kagome cried. "Just shut up! You were the fraud! You were never here to begin with!"
'I'll help you.'
"Ah!" Kagome rolled on her side as she laid on the floor. She sobbed silently to herself again. "I'm not her!"
She cried for a few minutes and wiped her eyes. She looked at the kitchen ceiling. Slowly, she moved her body to pick herself up and stumbled her way to up the stairs.
She opened the door and turned on the lights. She made her way to the mirror.
"What am I doing?" she whispered to herself. "I look like shit."
Her whole face was pale like a ghost. Her eyes were swollen and red. Her nose was stuffy. Her lips looked swollen from biting on them too much. Her hair was all over the place for pulling on it.
She basically looked like she was on drugs.
She took deep breaths to control her hiccups.
She used her shaky hands to turn on the water from the sink. She made sure it was cold to bring down the swelling as she splashed it on her face over and over.
"Maybe some foundation would help," she said to her reflection. "And some blush. I look like a fucking ghost."
Grabbing a small towel on her way out of the bathroom, she wiped her face clean and walked to her room.
She rummaged through her make-up bag and started applying foundation.
"Pink blush looks nice," she said as she brushed it on.
Her eyes roamed her counter. "He did like red," she said as she applied her red lipstick.
She looked at herself in the mirror. "See? I look pretty now. Inuyasha always thought I was pretty, right?" She let out a soft laugh. Then . . .
She frowned.
She walked to her bed and sat down. She didn't feel so good. Her stomach was in knots and she hated it. She laid down on the bed then.
Her eyes wandered around her room and then she stopped on one object.
Rolling to her side, she reached to grab it from her night stand. She began to rub its soft ears that reminded her from the hanyou she grew attached to.
"Hey, Inu," she whispered.
The stuffed dog that Inuyasha gave her from the time they went to the carnival looked back at her with expressionless eyes.
Kagome sighed and hugged it close to her chest.
"That stupid idiot," she said in anger. She got up from her bed. She placed the stuffed dog back on the night stand.
She sat on the bed for a few second before making her way down the stairs. She walked to the kitchen and stared at the orchids on the table.
"Here goes nothing," she breathed out as she made her way out of the house.
"I can't seem to believe all of this," Dr. Higurashi sighed. She looked at all the teens around her. "How could all of this happen?"
"It just did," Kouga said as he slouched on the chair.
Everyone explained about the whole Hojo situation. How he used Kagome when they were younger, and now. How he made Kagome cry. How Kagome realized why Kikyo dumped him. How Inuyasha Kouga pulled that prank on her to get even. Everything.
"But Hojo? I heard his a perfect gentleman. He has good grades. Stays out of trouble. It's just hard to believe he could do such a thing," Dr. Higurashi said.
Souta sighed out of frustration. "Mom!"
The older woman snapped her head to her son.
"Stop it!" he hissed. "Kagome has been crying over and over for that jerk and the only one that actually help her was Inuyasha! You always leave us alone! Yes, we do good at school! Yes, we do our chores! Yes, we behave well! We do this because you ask us to! But you never do anything for us! What more prove do you need? Kagome is already fed up with pretending because of you! She can't live like that! I can't live like that!"
"You know darn well why I do this," Dr. Higurashi whispered, glaring at her son. "And don't ever raise your voice at me, young man."
Souta rolled his eyes. "Yes, we know. For your own benefit! But this isn't the way Kagome wished to be! You made her like this for your own sake!"
"I did it to protect her!" the mother yelled.
"No, you did it because you can't handle the fact that you also need help! You're not over it either!"
"Enough!" Dr. Higurashi glared at everyone. "This is ridiculous!"
"Why are you so afraid?"
Dr. Higurashi looked at the red head.
Ayame tilted her head slightly to the side as if she was observing. "Why are you so afraid? Why do you hide behind that mask you wear?" she asked in her innocent tone.
Dr. Higurashi glared at her. "You know nothing."
"I know that same expression that you have your daughter seems to have as well," Ayame said. "Like you both hide emotions that you don't want to show. You seem to handle it well while you're daughter just can't and you make it impossible for her."
"You know nothing about my daughter," Dr. Higurashi hissed.
Kouga growled as he wrapped an arm around Ayame. Ayame placed a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. She gave Dr. Higurashi a sympathetic look. "I know she cares deeply for a hanyou," she whispered.
"Kagome?" Souta whispered.
Everyone turned their heads to the entrance as they saw Kagome walk in. She looked like a timid ghost walking inside the hospital. She spotted everyone and walked over to them.
"Where is he?" she asked urgently. "Where? What happened? Is he okay? Tell me!"
Kouga stood up and walked over to her. "Kagome, calm down. He's just in a small coma right now," he said carefully.
"What?" Kagome's eyes widen. She looked around nervously and her hands fisted her hair.
"Kagome . . ." Sango whispered. Her tears began to fall as she watched her friend like this.
"I need to see him! Please! I need to see him!" Kagome said, giving Kouga a pleading look.
Kouga sighed. "He's in room 318. Do you know where it-"
Before he finished, Kagome was already walking away.
Kouga looked at everyone. "What's wrong with her? Why is she like that?" he asked a bit afraid.
"She can't pretend anymore," Souta whispered.
Sango bursted out crying and Miroku held her with a few tears watering his eyes.
Dr. Higurashi stood and walked to where her daughter went.
Kouga looked at Souta in slight confusion.
Souta sighed. "Let me start from the beginning . . ."
Kagome stared at the white door before her with fright. She hesitated to turn the door knob.
Was she ready for this?
Can she handle it?
'Please God,' she begged.
Bitting her lip, she slowly opened the door.
A hand was placed over her mouth as she saw the sight before her.
'And you look just like her as well.'
Wires were connected everywhere.
'You starting to act like her, too.'
The bruises were just horrible.
'I can see you looking at me like she does.'
Huge bandages were everywhere. On one of his eyes, arms, cheek, and one wrapped around his head covering his ears.
'You're worthless.'
Tiny tubes were placed in his nose.
'You're stupid..'
The heart monitor was the only sound in the room.
'Noone will want you.'
Kagome felt her tears run down her cheeks and she immediately closed the door. She stumbled backwards and leaned against the cold wall.
She can't remember the last time she has seen something so horrible. That didn't look like the Inuyasha she knows. The Inuyasha she knows always looks strong, happy, so sure of himself, and looks at her like noone else would.
The Inuyasha that laid on the bed was the total opposite. He looked weak, powerless, and frail. He looked so damaged . . .
Almost dead . . .
Kagome let out a soft sob as she closed her eyes tightly and try not to let the tears fall down.
"Kagome?"
She lifted her head slowly and opened her eyes to see her mother standing before her.
"What happened to him?" Kagome asked.
Dr. Higurashi held an expressionless face as she brushed a piece of her daughter's hair behind her ear. "I was told that Hojo did this," she said.
Kagome closed her eyes for a moment. "Figures."
"Why didn't you tell me about Hojo?"
Kagome opened her eyes. "Would you have listened?"
Dr. Higurashi was quiet for a moment. "I was told about this by him but I didn't believe it."
"When did he tell you this?" Kagome asked.
"When he turned eighteen."
"And you didn't believe him?"
"Why would I?"
Kagome remained quiet, staring at her mother.
"I see you put on make-up to look decent for him," she said in a soft voice that almost sounded like the one Kagome used to use.
"I didn't want to look like a mess," Kagome whispered.
"I did tell you try not to break down but you didn't listen to me," Dr. Higurashi said.
Kagome looked at her with a hollow face.
"You're back to the way you were before," Dr. Higurashi said, studying her daughter's face.
"This was just a mask I used," Kagome said in that quiet whisper. "It just fell."
"Because you let it fall."
Kagome shrugged. "I wanted to show myself."
Dr. Higurashi raised a brow. "Can you handle being yourself?" she asked.
"Can you?" Kagome shot back. "You're not that different from me. You and I both know why I'm like this and you, yourself, also pretend."
"Your brother also pretended."
"Yes, and he stopped because it wasn't him," Kagome said, wiping her tears. "He didn't go through what I went through. He was too young to understand."
"You were young, too," her mother said.
"Then you didn't do anything to help me," Kagome hissed.
"I did. I made you flawless," the older woman said in defense.
"For your own benefit," Kagome glared at her. "You didn't help me. You controlled me and turned me into something I'm not to make your life easier. It affect you just as much as it did to me. I was young and I needed help."
"I gave it to you," Dr. Higurashi said firmly.
Kagome shook her head. "No, you treated me like one of your patients."
"You needed psychological help!" Dr. Higurashi raised her voice.
"I needed my mother!" Kagome yelled.
Dr. Higurashi looked at Kagome in disbelief. "I meant to do good," she whispered.
Kagome's face softened. "I know," she said.
Dr. Higurashi just stared at her daughter not knowing what to do.
"I still need my mother," Kagome whispered.
Dr. Higurashi sighed. She hesitantly wrapped her arms around her daughter and slowly pulled her close.
"I-I'll try," she said.
Kagome sighed as he wrapped her arms around her, too. "This is a good start."
Her eyes looked at the white door. What is she going to do now? Is she strong enough to go through this pain all over again?
'You're just like you're mother. And I can save you.'
Okay, this was a tricky chapter to write and I hope you enjoyed it. Stay tuned for the other chapter!
Please review!
Tootles!
Crystal