A/N: Okay happy holidays everyone! This chapter will be the penultimate one before Christmas and I hope you continue to enjoy the story into the festive season and beyond! Okay I'm feeling a bit lazy to answer reviews individually but I will take the general comments and questions into account. Firstly everyone seemed somewhat moved by Christa's death and I was fairly surprised the plot led to this anyway as she was originally going to last much longer, but then other characters fit the roles I had planned for Christa much better. So although it's sad I wanted to show the true despair of the situation the survivors are in through a suicide.

Secondly, it seems a lot of you are confused about Nate's POV on things and that's exactly what I wanted! It's great writing about someone who is out of it completely so you can't tell who's real and who isn't. Sure I've written dreams and hallucinations before but Nate is a experiment of a character and I have blast writing about him. I can confirm for now that Marisol is alive, however in the future you as readers will decide whether what happens in Nate's POV is true or false.

and as for "It's me" reference I did get that from Five Nights At Freddy's, I couldn't help myself.

Okay on with this chapter!

Rebecca watched sadly as the grains of dirt trickled from in-between the cracks in Kenny's fingers. The bearded man also looked mournful as the grains of dirt he released from his hand landed on Christa's forehead. The only part of the tall woman that was still visible, with a final few grains of dirt being piled onto her corpse, the African american woman who had survived so much and come so far was finally buried beneath the earth. She was finally at peace, with her family which was more than what could be said about the trio surrounding her grave.

"Well... shit" Kenny finally muttered breaking the silence as he used his bare hands to flatten the dirt patch around Christa's grave, they had dug up a small patch outside of the house they were currently residing in. Although it was now midday the white sun did little to warm the backs of Kenny, Rebecca and Sarita. Besides the usual murky grey clouds were rolling into sight, soon or later another storm would approach, Sarita wiped away a few tears before she croaked "She... she just gave up. She couldn't take it anymore, it's just..." she dissolved into more tears as Kenny embraced her muttering soothing things into her ears. As Rebecca folded her arms over her chest feeling a bit like an outsider.

What was there to be done? Kenny finally came down to the basement to find Rebecca holding onto Christa's corpse. The shocked man had demanded instantly to know what Rebecca had done. "It ain't no lie you two didn't get on! But fucking hell Rebecca, sinking to this...!?" Rebecca looked up and pleaded her innocence with a snappy "I found her and Bonnie like this. Sticking this shit into their arms" she held up a needle for evidence as Kenny calmed down slightly as Rebecca showed him the sights, the picture of the family, the poem, the needles sprawled on the floor. Sarita managed to drag herself down to the basement by this point, she picked up on events very fast and when she learned about what had gone down... she couldn't help but sob uncontrollably.

"She committed suicide, that's what this was" Rebecca muttered sadly at the patch of earth below her, as Kenny coughed to break the heavy silence between the three caused by the death of another ally.

After Christa's death, Kenny and Rebecca stormed around the house looking for Bonnie but the redhead was nowhere to be found, Kenny even dared to search the woods around the house for a short while, shouting Bonnie's name hoping that the high as a kite woman would register his voice. However Sarita began doubling over in pain shortly after Kenny had left, leaving Rebecca to run out to find Kenny, in the hours since Kenny did not bring any plans to try and find Bonnie once again. Sarita needed him by her side and whether Rebecca liked it or not she knew that Sarita's baby was coming and that Kenny valued his son or daughter's life, over that of a friend.

"Anyone want to say anything?" Kenny asked of the two woman to his left, he sounded mentally exhausted as he tried to rub the deep wrinkles developing on his forehead. Sarita muttered a simple "I'm sorry this happened to you Christa, I hope you found peace now wherever you are" before Kenny gave his short speech "Ah, Christa look we didn't always get on but... fuck, did you have to leave us like this? It was like Kajtaa wasn't it, hey Christa? I forgive you but it still don't make it right..."

"Kenny" Sarita sobbed, as she noticed Kenny's one remaining eye had become strangely reflective. Kenny sniffed and gazed back into his pregnant girlfriend's eyes "I just... I'm sorry Sarita, it just brings back memories" he told her as she held onto him tightly. Kenny turned to Rebecca.

"Anything you want to say?"

Rebecca shook her head as she silently gazed at the patch of dirt below her, at her silence Kenny sighed and supported Sarita as they limped slowly back towards the house. Rebecca tailed after them a short time later, she said all she needed to say to Christa as she died.

Christa had simply lost too much and given up in the end.

Back inside the house the mood was more sombre than ever, Kenny helped Sarita to seat herself on the floor as the two kept their heads bowed and bathed in the dust and silence around them. Christa was dead, Bonnie was missing two people were gone in the space of a night and the house felt much emptier now. Kenny could only pull Sarita closer as she rested her head on his shoulder, taking off his cap and ruffling his musty greying hairs.

Christa, Lilly, Clementine... all people he had known from the past who had come back to him. Two of them were dead and the third was also missing and possibly dead as well. Kenny couldn't bear it if he lost anyone else and he knew he needed Sarita by his side, ever since Kajtaa and Duck died he had never been the same. Until Sarita came along.

Hiding in a boarded up restaurant, the wooden barricades blocked the majority of the sunlight as the man with the long beard lay slumped in the darkest corner of the place. His eyes were vacant as he gazed blankly at nothingness, wondering why on earth he was still fighting. Why didn't he just let himself die in that alley? He wanted to die, yet for some strange reason his fists acted of their own accord as they connected with each walker's head, sending them sprawling to the ground. He kept on going, running on adrenaline taking over his system and then suddenly he wasn't in the alley anymore. He was out on the street, the walkers were approaching him but he had space.

Space to run, and run Kenny did. He tried his hardest to find the group again, to find Clementine, Lee, Christa or Omid. But Savannah was infested with walkers and Kenny found himself fleeing from the city, his boat plan in tatters, Ben and God knows who else were dead because of it. He was alone and barely had much of a will to go on. Yet despite all the odds being stacked against him, he carried on surviving, a strange ambition of his being able to find the boat Vernon stole from his group, yet he never saw Vernon again or those cancer survivors.

Months later in this restaurant he was low and food and drink, maybe this was how he'd give up. Kenny was against suicide but really what was the point? Who was he surviving for now? Everyone was dead. Who was he protecting? No one. What was his purpose? Survive, but wander aimlessly like a walker. He never dreamt Sarita would come crashing into the restaurant, the Indian woman looking for a place to shelter, she froze in her tracks when she spotted Kenny's skinny form, stacked up on the wall. She lifted her gun instantly and screamed "PUT THE GUN DOWN! NO FUNNY BUSINESS OR I'LL SHOOT!"

Kenny didn't reply, he didn't have a gun on him. He had lost his gun a long time ago and he hadn't encountered anyone since Savannah. The sudden appearance of this woman made him look up in curiosity.

"I... haven't got a gun" he mumbled, his voice seemingly rusty as he had not spoken to another human being in months.

The woman lowered her gun slightly and seeing the state Kenny was in, with his saddened expression, clothes that hung loosely of him, a stale stench of waste and urine and his straggly beard. Sarita knew instantly that this man hadn't been looking after himself at all, which was surprising out of all the people she expected to encounter after months of isolation, she expected a bandit, not this. Her curiosity aroused somewhat she muttered "Um... are you okay?" in which Kenny shook his head.

"I haven't been in a long time, look if you're hear to shoot me or loot my supplies or whatever, go ahead I ain't got much anyway" he muttered as Sarita slowly approached him.

"I only have a few supplies myself, rather than killing why don't we trade?" she suggested as Kenny's eyes lifted slightly more, out of all the horrid people he had encountered in this world, he was surprised himself this woman had some sympathy for him.

"That sounds good, are you by yourself?" Kenny asked, as Sarita sat by him, crinkling her nose slightly at the stench that emitted from the bearded man. She nodded her head and replied with "Yes, I've been alone since this thing started, your the first person I've encountered in months" in which Kenny carried on the conversation by adding "Me too, been with a group before. Wife, Kid, friends and all sorts, but they're all dead now" he said bitterly as Sarita's brown eyes widened.

"You lost your family? Oh you poor man..." she said softly as Kenny merely remained silent, wondering when a gang would show up and mug or kill him. He didn't care anymore he had no fight left in him, let this woman do what she wanted to him, he didn't care. Yet Sarita continued with "I'm Sarita and you are?"

"Kenny" was the somewhat cold response.

She took note of his name and blurted out "You know, you don't seem like a bad man Kenny, maybe it would better if we stayed together for a while. I know this is sudden and we have just met, but it would be easier for us both if we have each other's backs" she smiled nervously at the daring offer she had just made. Kenny didn't respond for a short while before he felt the weight of Sarita's eyes on his shoulders, he gave in and muttered "Okay then, Sarita is it?" she nodded as Kenny continued "If you want to stay together fine. I promise you I won't be a threat, more like a liability" he spat at himself.

Sarita gulped, but she took the plunge and placed her arm around Kenny's, he recoiled instantly at her touch and pulled his arm away.

"What are you doing?" he lashed out, as Sarita sighed, hurt somewhat but her maternal instinct awakening within her.

"You need something to eat Kenny, you're no good like this and you need a good wash as well. and too trim that beard, any walker could grab that, it's unhygienic as well. and you need..."

"What are you my mother?" Kenny replied, for the first time in months a small smile playing on his face, as Sarita put her hands on her hips.

"You're just no good to me dead" she responded, as this time Kenny allowed her too touch him and help him too his feet, he faced Sarita again and blinked as if he suddenly just realised there was a real human being in front of him, as he asked "Why are you doing this Sarita?"

She smiled at him, the full horrors of the apocalypse had not yet affected her as they had done to him, because her answer was still so innocent for someone surviving in this hell.

"Sometimes doing good things, can be good for you too"

The maternal body contact Sarita had with Kenny soon became more affectionate, climaxing with a kiss no where special, just in the middle of nowhere during a particularly cold night, two lonely people craving a purpose, craving someone to care for, to protect and they found that within each other. For those reasons that's why Kenny held onto Sarita tightly now. She felt her grip suddenly increase, as he looked down at her, she looked panicked as Kenny's eyes travelled down towards her trousers and the growing dark patch developing there...

"Oh shit" he muttered as Sarita managed to gasp "Kenny, the baby's coming... I..." she sounded scared as Kenny bellowed "REBECCA! REB...!"

"I know Kenny" Rebecca said almost instantly appearing at the doorway to the room they were in, she looked at Sarita and then back at Kenny "You could have told us Sarita was this far along, but there's no use now crying over that now. Get her upstairs and stay with her, I'll see what supplies I can find" she informed them. Kenny breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you" he said to her as she merely smiled.

Yet as Kenny dragged Sarita up the stairs, as she moaned in agony Kenny knew the harsh truth. He had done all he could in his power to get meds for him and Sarita. Both of them had done horrible things to ensure the meds would be there so Sarita could survive the childbirth and the child could be healthy. Now, despite everything they had done, they had nothing. No medical supplies at all, they were all lost back at the lake as Kenny cursed his luck.

Despite what happened he would not lose someone else.

"Sarita's going to be fine" he reassured himself.

The orange sun began to fall in the sky, Molly sighed to herself and crossed off another day in this wilderness, day after day after day it was all the same. Wake up, walk, eat, sleep. Repeat. Surviving was mundane especially when you were by yourself, but now in the company of a couple in denial and a cheery 16 year old, Molly could certainly keep herself entertained. Because for one winding up Nick was hilarious for her and two Sarah and her seemed to bond instantly and Molly liked that Sarah wasn't the usual "bad-ass" you'd be expected to come across, no it was as if she stumbled upon a real family before all this shit had started.

"The way were going now, we aren't finding shelter for the night" Stephanie piped up glumly, gazing around the endless pine trees around her.

"Ah don't worry, Nick will make sure you keep warm Stef, just remember you can have sex without taking your clothes off..."

"Really? How!?" Sarah asked innocently as Nick physically had to drag her away from the bad influence of Molly, as Molly herself laughed at Nick's furious face as he snapped "She's 16, she doesn't need to know about all this shit..."

"Um, from what I gathered Nick, it seems she's already experienced this shit and at 16 it's a perfectly normal age to know about that stuff" Molly lectured as Sarah piped up to Nick "Yeah it's okay Nick, I know about sex and everything. I'm old enough now..." Nick shook his head cutting her off as he darkly muttered "That's enough Sarah, after what happened to you I don't... I don't feel comfortable with you talking about it". This revelation made Molly chuckle in a somewhat harsh manner as she told Nick "You're not her dad"

"and you're not her mother, so don't tell me shit about how to raise her" Nick snapped back, as Molly inhaled and managed to mutter (albeit more calmly) "I get it you want to protect her and all, trust me I've been there, but... you need to understand you can't be there for her all the time..."

"Well neither can you! and yeah I know I'm not going to be around her all the time but I've taught her the basics and...!"

"The basics! Nick you've got to understand she's practically an adult now! She's not a kid anymore...!"

"You don't understand! It's not like that..." he then looked back at Sarah timidly before he whispered at Molly "She's autistic alright? So back off"

"I'm what?" Sarah asked failing to overhear the A word in Nick's hushed tone, Nick looked back at her and calmly told her "It's nothing Sarah alright? Just..."

"You haven't told her about that? If she can handle some of shit I've overheard her going through, than that's nothing in comparison it doesn't even matter..."

"Yes it does!" Nick growled beginning to seriously lose his temper.

"Yeah and you didn't help matters by beating her boyfriend to death right in front of her!" Molly snapped, as Nick shot Sarah an accusing glare and seethed "You told her about that?" as Sarah nodded shyly and faced the floor muttering to the brown leaves below her "Please stop fighting" which had absolutely no effect, as Nick ranted over to Sarah "Sarah we don't know her! We can't go telling random strangers about our life stories..."

"Hey, I'm a random stranger giving you some advice" Molly snapped as she and Nick glared openly at one another.

"You're only giving him advice because you see Sarah as a replacement for your sister. Nick's fucked up for sure but at least he tried to protect Sarah" Stephanie spoke up as she lifted a tatty old picture into the air, showing the face of Molly's long lost sister as Molly's eyes widened in shock as she ruffled her clothes and pockets, realising that by this point the silent black haired woman had somehow stolen her treasured picture of her sister.

"How did you...?"

"It doesn't matter, how did she die, huh Molly? How did you fail her?"

"Get your head out of your boyfriend's ass and give me that damn picture back..."

"Well stop trying to tell Nick how to look after Sarah then! and if you get a kick out of exposing our flaws, why don't you tell us about your own..."

"GIVE IT BACK!" Molly screeched diving at Stephanie.

Landing on the woman Molly managed to aim a punch at Stephanie's face that the brunette woman managed to avoid by a mere inch, Stephanie managed to elbow Molly in the chest, as the blond woman grunted in pain. Before she could aim another punch at Stephanie, Nick managed to pry the enraged older woman off Stephanie's form as Molly yelled at her "GIVE ME BACK THAT DAMN PHOTO!" A shaken Stephanie, extended her arm as Molly angrily tugged the photo of her lost sister from the other woman's grip and treasured it back into her pocket.

"How the hell did you know she was my sister?" she snapped at Stephanie as the younger woman replied causally "Well I figured she can't have been your daughter and seeing how you acted around Sarah... I presumed and I presumed correctly she even looks a bit like you" Stephanie replied as Molly sighed to herself and muttered sadly "Her name was Hilda" she said no more as Sarah finally broke the silence.

"I... bet your sister was really nice" she uttered as Molly gave her a small smile.

"She was"

Nick gulped and tried to calm his hot head as he asked of Molly "What happened to her?"

Molly's smile died instantly and was replaced with a harsh scowl as she snarled at Nick "It's none of your business asshole, besides we've been arguing here long enough we'll draw walkers. Let's get moving..."

"Just wanted to know something personal about you, seeing as you now probably now everything about us...!" Nick yelled after her as she stormed off in a huff. Not responding to Nick's accusation as Nick sighed and muttered "God fucking dammit, she's a handful" as he helped Stephanie to her feet he rounded on a still silent Sarah as he muttered calmly to her "Look I don't blame you Sarah just... be more careful next time to how much you tell others about us, okay?" Sarah nodded obediently, however that didn't mean she didn't have anything to say.

"You should both apologise to Molly, I don't want any more fights" she requested of them as Stephanie looked down rather disgraced with herself as she murmured "I know I went too far Sarah and I had no right to invade her privacy like that it was just...if she really did know Clem beforehand and she wants to travel with us I wanted her to tell us a bit more about herself" Stephanie reasoned before she shook her head and looked after where Molly had stormed off as Sarah decided to speak up again.

"Maybe were all as bad as each other, after all you won't two won't tell me if your boyfriend and girlfriend. and Nick... you won't let me talk about sex, even though..."

"Look Sarah I'm worried about you, okay" Nick admitted as he looked back at the spot Molly had stormed off before he continued "You don't have to speak about that sort of stuff so openly with her, I know what happened to you was traumatic and I was sorry I wasn't there to stop it, If you keep talking about it, it might bring up memories and..." Nick reasoned as Sarah's brows furrowed in frustration.

"You sound like my dad Nick, I can talk about what I want now, I'm not a baby anymore!" she yelled as she stormed off in the same direction as Molly, Nick tried to yell after her but she didn't stop to face him. A sighing Nick turned to face Stephanie and muttered "Don't storm off on me as well" in which she gave a small laugh, before he carried on "I don't like her Stef, she's gonna be a bad influence on Sarah, encouraging her to talk about that sort of stuff..."

"Well you and me joked about what happened to me concerning the whole rape thing, Maybe that's how Molly and Sarah are bonding, like we did. Different people cope in different ways Nick" her words of wisdom crashed over Nick as he mentally slapped himself, he had criticized Vitali a lifetime ago before realising he was just like him. He was criticising Molly bonding with Sarah, when he bonded with Stephanie in a similar manner. He had criticised Carlos for mollycoddling Sarah and now he was starting to become overprotective of Sarah.

"Well, then again what happened to Sarah happened weeks ago, for you it was months. I'm not saying it's any different and all... but... you had more time too... recover" Nick finished nervously upon looking upon Stephanie's pokerface, she responded to this in a somewhat cold manner "I never recovered from it Nick, I don't think I ever will" as Nick gulped and mentally slapped himself once again, was it any wonder why Stephanie always shook at night?

"God, I'm stupid, I'm sorry Stef I... fuck..." he muttered, as his blue eyes found the floor and he spat at himself "I'm worthless" as Stephanie looked at him in slight alarm realising now how easily Nick could fall back into the cycle of self loathing and self harm through a simple argument. She coughed and clicked her fingers "Hey Nick, look at me" she instructed as Nick's eyes met her's and she took him by the shoulders.

"You're not worthless okay, people screw up sometimes I do, you do, we all do. Look Sarah likes Molly and it's great they get on, but she adores you. Because everything you do, you do it too protect her" she spoke to motivate Nick, whose eyes shone for a spilt second.

"You think so?" he asked uncertainly.

"I know so" she reassured him, as he stood up tall once again and looked ahead before looking down at Stephanie once again "Thanks Stef" he mused as her smile widened. It took Nick a second to clock on that they were alone and with that he smiled and leaned in...

"HEY! ARE YOU TWO COMING ALONG OR WHAT!?" Molly snapped from some-point ahead as Nick and Stephanie groaned and broke apart. Following the irritated blonde woman and the sulky Sarah, Nick wondered if he would ever get any time alone with Stephanie in the upcoming days, as soon as they found this damn truck Molly was on about and the sooner they got to Wellington, the better. No more walkers to worry about, no need to constantly keep walking and trying to find any sort of shelter and food.

And hopefully no more causalities.

Bonnie smiled, the out of focus tree's blurring and suddenly enlarging in her vision as she skipped along, the sky was blue, then green, then pink as the multicoloured sun began to fall slowly in the sky. Wiping away a wet substance that dribbled down her lip, Bonnie continued to skip on after her intended target and that target was none other than Luke himself.

"Come on Bonnie!" he yelled.

"I'm comin' Luke!" She mused, laughing as she tripped over, getting to her feet she noticed a few growling demons trailing her. Not that she cared of course, Luke would protect her, she had no Mike anymore, No Leland. No friends either, no Wyatt, Vince, Russell, Shel or Becca, they were all dead and gone, she was all that remained out of all of them. She was all that was left, the helpless good for nothing junkie, her only help of salvation lay within the figure of Luke who she approached with a wide smile.

Luke. Maybe Mike was right, maybe a small part of her had always loved him and admired him and now that Mike was gone it was her dream to hold him again, to kiss him. To live a bizarre happily ever after with him, after everything she had lost she deserved this. So when she crashed into Luke's form she didn't let go of him, as her lips met his and they kissed, Bonnie savouring the taste of his lips on her own.

"I've been waitin' for you Bonnie" he mused, as she looked into his dark eyes and heavy eyebrows, he was so handsome and kind, everything she had ever wanted in a man. After all her failed romances this was it, this was her happily ever after. No worries, no bickering others, just her and Luke in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of these woods. Where Bonnie had longed to be free, she was here now, no more observing, no more caring and no more fighting.

She was free.

She sat by Luke, clutching onto his strong arm as he grabbed a small piece of sharp bark and engraved a marking into a nearby tree that read...

B X L

A love heart surrounded this engraving of her and Luke's initials, as Bonnie smiled happily and leaned on his shoulder as she muttered "I just want to stay here, I don't wanna leave Luke" as he smiled and pulled her closer as she felt herself get warmer.

"We'll stay then" he muttered as Bonnie laughed happily, as she felt her stomach swirl with butterflies.

She closed her eyes and relaxed, failing to notice the approaching demons...

Luke gasped when he Eddie and Clementine came across the site a few hours later.

The sun had set in the sky, the last rays of light illuminated the gory scene clearly, as the three wolves feasted on their meal stuffing bits of skin and guts into their parched mouths. Their sharp teeth ripping through layers of fabric, Luke was transfixed at the sight as he bellowed mournfully "Fuck! It's Bonnie!" in which Clementine felt her stomach drop.

One of the wolves was munching on half of Bonnie's head, her skull cracked as the wolf munched greedily on it. Bits of grey brain and splintered bone leaking out of her crushed head as bits of her ginger hairs lay tangled in the wolves' teeth as they continued to feast on their long awaited meal. Filling their empty stomachs full of the thick crimson blood that once ran through Bonnie's veins.

Luke vomited a mere second later, as Eddie went into some sort of shock and turned around and gasped "Don't look AJ, Jesus Christ Bonnie..." Clementine only gazed ahead in horror, looking at the limbs that had been torn from Bonnie's body, two of the wolves closest to her stripped one of her legs down to the bone, ripping off the strips of muscle as if they were slices of bacon, at the sounds of Luke's vomit splashing against the tree the trio of wolves looked up, their greedy small eyes locking themselves on Clementine.

By some means she managed to lift her pistol as they began to growl at her, she fired a single shot into the air as the trio of wolves scurried off instantly leaving a trail with their bloody footprints. Luke watched them in disbelief as he looked down at the gory shredded mess that was once Bonnie, a woman he once loved.

"I wonder if she was with anyone" Eddie managed to croak as Luke shook his head "She musta been on her own, she can't have had on gun on her... Oh God..." Luke trailed to a halt as Eddie offered him a look of sympathy, he had been cold with Luke all day as they walked on through the woods. Hearing the howls of the wolves nearby, they had proceeded upwards to see if anyone was in trouble. However they had come far too late, the wolves had claimed their first victim.

Clementine sniffed slightly, trying hard not to let her emotions overcome her and the sight of old friend ripped to shreds, Bonnie had been ripped apart by bullets the first time. And wolves the second time. Her second chance was failing, she couldn't save everyone, not forever.

As Clementine let this damming news sink onto her shoulders, Luke clenched his eyes open and crept carefully onto the bloodies scene, trying hard not to look at the single eyeball on the floor, with a bloody socket still attached behind it. Trying hard not to look at the shredded clothes, or exposed bits of pale skin, he checked if she had any supplies on her. She had nothing. She either dropped them, lost them at the lake or the wolves scattered them nearby. There was no blood trail leading up to this spot, so they must have caught her here.

"What a painful way to go" Eddie commented as Luke tried hard to hold back the growing tears, feeling his grip on reality slowly blur as the nasty shock of finding Bonnie like this, zapped away much of the confidence he once had. Gulping his eyes (for some strange reason) locked onto Bonnie's pale left arm which still lay intact (hauntingly enough) it was as pale as ever, but littered with red holes, which Luke didn't pay too much attention too. The limb lay in the dirt, it's fingers still bent at an angle as Luke's eyes travelled upwards.

It was there he saw the engraving on the tree. Past the dollops of blood plastered onto the bark, the simple message in the tree, that Bonnie had engraved into it during her last moments.

B X L

Clementine was asking him if he was alright, as he wiped away the tears that had flooded his eyes upon seeing the small engraving he knew what the message on the bark meant. He knew that she must have always loved him and where had he been?

He had never been there for her.