Hey everyone, here is the next chapter for you all. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Thank you so much for all the reviews, you are brilliant and awesome. Thank you!

Enjoy and please review

All mistakes are my own

Reid sat against the park bench and felt physically and mentally exhausted. Why had he gone to her? Why could he not just have ignored the letter? He closed his eyes and then opened them to look at the playground in front of him, the same playground that had helped him decide on being a father. This wasn't how he had imagined his life. He imagined working with the team as long as he could, getting married and having a family. He had a family but not in the way he had always imagined. He loved his daughter with all his heart and wanted to give her a good childhood. He loved Emily and hoped that she would be the one he married. No matter what he did though, he knew that Callie would always be in the shadows. With everything that he had, he wanted to prevent Beatrix knowing about Callie. He wanted to raise her in a home where she was safe but he knew he would forever be looking in the shadows, waiting for someone to hurt him or to try to hurt his daughter.

His eyes burned as they started to water, he didn't understand why he was getting upset. This is not what strong men do. Everything was beginning to get to him and it hit him that he should have never gone to the prison. The fear, the emotion that he had managed to control finally, was breaking free again. It was clawing its way through his entire body.

"Reid?" he heard a voice call. He looked up to see Garcia pushing a pram with Morgan at her side. He turned away quickly and wiped his eyes, he didn't want them to see him like this. Garcia pushed the pram over to the bench, he saw the look on her face and knew she was worried about him. He got to his feet and smiled when he saw Beatrix in the pram, she was asleep. He let out a small chuckle as he noticed the blanket that covered her. In wonderful stitching was Beatrix's name, a small bear with glasses had got stitched into the blanket as well.

"Reid, what's wrong? Did you get all your errands done?" Garcia asked as she and Morgan sat down on the bench, she pulled Reid back down to bench gently. A small noise came from the pram but Garcia began to move it backwards and forwards, the motion sending Beatrix back to sleep.

"I'm fine," Reid lied, his voice shook though and sounded uneasy.

"No, you are not okay," Morgan said. "What's wrong?"

"I lied to you when I asked you to look after Beatrix," Reid said quickly. "I didn't have errands to run. I went to the prison this morning and I spoke with Callie."

"What?!" Morgan shouted angrily. Reid flinched away from the anger that came from Morgan and stiffened. "Reid! What the hell were you thinking? Why would you go and see that woman? After everything she did to you. I told you to just ignore her."

"Morgan!" Garcia admonished in a hushed whisper before pointing to the pram. "Keep your voice down. Beatrix is sleeping."

Morgan looked at the pram and managed to calm down slightly. He looked to Reid and noticed the fear in his eyes and body. "Reid, why would you see that woman after what she did to you?"

"I know it was a mistake to go," Reid spoke. "I don't know why I went there. I went there to tell her to back off, I warned her to stay away if she ever got out of prison. She knows that I won't hesitate to end her if she came near us. Some of the things she said to me, they still make my skin crawl. She threw the phone at the glass when I told her that Beatrix already had a mother and that she would never a mother to Beatrix and Beatrix would never be her daughter. I don't know why I went to see her. I knew that if I told you the truth, you would have stopped me going. She said that I enjoyed what she did to me. I didn't though, I felt disgusting when she was abusing me. She put the knife to my throat and taunted me. I didn't want it."

Garcia brought her arm around him and hugged him close, she didn't like the empty look in his eyes. "Reid, sweetheart. Don't let her get into your mind. We know you didn't want it. What she did to you was disgusting. I'm sorry she did that to you. You know that we will protect Beatrix from every threat out there. We won't let anything happen to her. I agree with Morgan though, you shouldn't have seen her. She wanted you to see her and you did. It was what she wanted. You can't move on if you visit the past."

Reid came away from her shoulder and ran his hands through his hair.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore."

"Not this time, Reid. We aren't letting you get out this," Morgan said sternly. "Listen to me. It is obvious to me that you think you have dealt with the past but you haven't. Deep down, you are still fractured."

"You think I don't know that," Reid said in frustration before rising up from the bench. "Deep down, even when I'm at my happiest, I feel fractured. There are cracks inside me that won't let me move on fully. I had to rush getting better. Deep down, I'm still scarred by what happened. I lost two years of my life to her family. She raped me while I was in a coma. The thing is, I have no idea how I feel most of the time. She abused me and used me to conceive Beatrix. Ninety nine percent of myself hates, loathes and disgusted by her but there is one percent of me that can't get angry at her because she gave me Beatrix. I don't know how to feel. I love being a father and having a daughter but I don't think I can give her everything if I'm like this. I'm reminded everyday of how easily I can be hurt by this metal plate in my head. I can't keep depending on the team to take care of Beatrix when I'm ill or can't deal with what happened with me."

"Reid, we love taking care of Beatrix, you know that," Garcia said.

"I know you love taking care of her but I feel that every time I leave her with you, I'm not being a father. Fathers are to be strong. I don't feel strong. Going to that prison has messed up my head. I just want to go home. I'll talk about everything tomorrow but I just can't deal with everything right now. I just can't."

"We will take you home," Garcia nodded gently. "You are talking tomorrow though."

Later that night

Reid sat in the rocking chair with Beatrix in his arms, he rocked back and forth and smiled as she stared back at him with her big brown eyes, his eyes. He stroked her short brown hair causing her to smile. Looking at her, he could only see himself. She had his hair and his eyes. He continued to rock in the chair with her in his arms. Looking at her, he knew he had to be strong for her. He had to resolve the issues of the past to give her the best future he could.

"I love you but I don't love your mother. I'm a little shaken now but I promise you, I will fix myself so I can give you a good future. Don't hate me though for what I am going to do to give you a good life. I don't want you to know your mother. Please, don't hate me because I want to do everything in the world to protect you. I want you to know that I will always love you and try to be the best father I can be. When you are older, I just hope you understand that everything I do is to protect you."

Please review