My notes: Hey, All! Hope you like the previous chapter. I'm not going to tell you what is all about here. I'm not in the cheer mood and I'm not in the mood at all! Wonder why? If you're HALO fan you'll understand me. We still hope though! Hope... Anyway, just want to warn you that this is a little angst chapter. Title spoke for itself. It's mostly Peter POV. Read and review people!...

Chapter 35 Suicide

Petrelli Beach House, NY

Angela sat on the chair in the library and her head was lying back. She pick up the phone.

'Ma?' Nathan was at the other side of the line.

'He is alive and it's better… ' were her only words.

Short pause.

'Thanks, ma. I really didn't want to…'

Angela hung up the phone. She wasn't on the mood to listen his apologizes. Peter was too important for her. Her gold, her boy. She had to protect him and she had failed. She had sent him just where it was the great danger.

Sudden cry made his way from the inside her and Angela cupped her head with her hands. She cried so bitterly. She wasn't crying for long ago. Even when Peter was presumable dead. Then she kept telling herself that he had sacrificed for the greater good. It hurtled. That pain in her heart didn't get away since then.

'My boy! My little boy…' she sobbed in her hands.

Her phone ringed and Angela tried to pull herself together.

'Hallo?' she said, thinking how may be she sounded.

'Are you crying?' that was Lora.

'No!' Angela snapped.

'Is he… okay?'

'Yes and he is awake…'

'I helped him, just like you asked me to!'

'Thank you... Lora!'

Short pause.

'You are really crying! You can't lie to me!' now she sounded concern. 'What's wrong?'

'It's just…' Angela made short pause. 'He is my boy, you know!'

'I know, but you sound like he is your only son...'

Angela heard someone enter in the room and said quickly.

'I have to go! Buy!' she hung up the phone and turned back to see Claire, standing on the door frame. She did not look good. Her face looked pale and she barely walked.

'He is… good…now…'

'Claire!' Angela screamed panicking as she watched the young woman falling on the ground. She rushed to her and put her head on her lap. 'Claire, dear wake up! Someone, please help me!' she screamed franticly. 'No! This cannot be happening! This is can't be happening! Claire!'

However, Claire body lay motionless in her hands. Her blond, curly hair covered her face. Claire didn't move, her face got paler in every second.

'What happened?' Matt was the first come there. His blood froze at the picture. 'Oh my God! Claire! What happened to her?'

'She is loosing her baby…' Angela answered still panicking.

'How did you know that?'

'Because I dreamt that!' she said and looked at Matt. 'Please take her upstairs!'

Matt took the motionless Claire and followed by Angela went upstairs.

'Why didn't you tell us?' Matt asked as he put Claire in her own bed.

'Maybe, maybe it's not too late… find that man… whatever his name is… from the hospital and bring him here…'

'What about Peter?' Matt said as he looking Angela sitting beside Claire.

'Peter can't do anything right now!'

'So it was a lie?' they heard Peter's quiet voice at the door frame. He was on his feet, staring at Claire on the bed.

'Mat, go!' Angela screamed and made Parkman move. He passed Peter and threw him just one look.

'What?' Angela looked at Peter who walked in the room. His face was blank. Very unemotional. He stood over her and didn't make any move close to Claire. 'No matter if I'm dying or living, we're gonna lost this baby!'

'Peter, don't dear…' she tried to touch his hand, but he pulled her over.

'Don't touch me!' Peter hissed. 'You are manipulator!'

'Sweetheart!'

'I… I fell in love with her! Even that I knew that she is my niece!' his hands are clenched in fists. 'I made her suffer all this! I made her fugitive, took her everything! Took her normal life! She could've been in the good college! I could've been stronger and said no, but… Why didn't you tell me?'

'Peter! Stop hurting yourself! It was not anybody's fault…' but Angela saw that she can't reach him.

Claire moaned and curled up in two. Peter moved his look on her. His eyes! Angela froze! She never saw him like this before!

'That was never meant to be, does it?' Peter smiled bitterly. 'Me and her… Never was a destiny!'

'Peter!' now she screamed. The look in his eyes wasn't good sign! It scared her!

Claire moaned again and Peter flinched.

'I wish she had killed me when she had a chance…' now his tears already rolled in his face. 'I know what I have to do now! I'll make her pain go away!' he said and turned around running out of the room.

'Peter!' Angela screamed after him.

Mohinder rushed in the room, with concerned face.

'What happen? I just saw Matt and Peter… ' then he saw Claire lying on the bed curled up in two. 'Oh, God! Again?' he rushed into her and leaned to check her pulse, but then frowned. 'She's burning up!'

'What?' Angela looked at him with confusion. Her thoughts were with her son, running away with pain in his eyes. Knowing him well, Angela knew that he was capable of suicide. That wasn't going to be his first time…

'Shanty virus…' Mohinder said with low voice. 'I don't know if it's her or the baby, but…'

'OW!' Claire screamed and took their attention. 'Save him! Save my baby!' she tossed on the bed and Angela saw how her breathing became harder. 'It… hurts… 'She screamed again and Mohinder rushed out of the room, hoping that Alex guy would still be there.

Petrelli Mantion, NY

'Yes?' Nathan answered in the two hard knocks on his door.

When the door opened, Nathan experienced the bigger shock in his life. Two lifeguards held Peter. His face was completely blank, but his eyes were full with desperation.

'Release him!' Nathan snapped. 'Don't you see that this is my brother?'

Guards were confused. They didn't recognize the Vice President's brother. They just saw one stranger, lurking around the Mansion, who told them that he wants to give up.

'We… sorry…'

'Leave!' Nathan snapped.

When the room began quiet, Nathan turned his look back at Peter's face. Something in him, reminded to Nathan for his old brother. The old Peter, who was too sensitive, too fragile for the world. That stroke him and Nathan suddenly realized that he still cared about his brother.

'What are you doing Peter? Why did you come here?' he asked and came close to him.

'I want you… to kill me!' Peter said with flat voice. But his eyes were full of pain.

'What?' that was the last thing, Nathan had expected to hear. 'You can't die…'

'I can now.' Peter moved his eyes straight at his brother. 'I'm not fully recovered. I can be killed and I'm begging you to do that!'

'Why?'

Peter smiled bitterly.

'Because I caused pain for too many people… People who I … love! I don't want to hurt them anymore…'

'Peter!' Nathan walked close to his brother. The only human being in matter for Peter now was Claire. He could be hurt like that only because of her. He looked devastated. 'What happened to you? Is it Claire?'

'Here!' Peter slipped his hand on his pocket and pulled one small gun. He shoved it in Nathan's hands. 'Just do this! I can't stand anymore! I want to die!'

Standing in front of his younger brother, who was begging for his death was too much for Nathan to handle it. He looked at the gun in his hand, then looked at Peter.

'What happened, Pete? Tell me!' he put the weapon on his desk.

'You don't want to kill me? Fine! I'll find someone else or I'll do it by myself!' Peter turned around to leave, but Nathan grabbed his elbow and stopped him. Peter told him the true. His abilities were gone for now. He wasn't strong enough.

'Don't do stupid things, Pete! Please, tell me what's going on!'

'I saw her future Nathan…' Peter didn't say who is 'she'. They both knew. 'I saw her future without me and our baby! She was sad and devastated… She cuts herself to see if she bleeds…' he fought with emotions. 'It hurts just to see her like that… It hurts so much! And I'm the reason of this! I put her in that way… It's my fault!'

Nathan grabbed his other elbow and made him look at him.

'What are you saying?'

'In the future… She killed me! She hated me enough to kill my future me!' Peter was broken. It was easy to hear that on his tone. 'She told me that I had taken everything from her! She had to kill me then… She had to… Only if I knew…'

'Peter… Please talk to me!'

Then Peter look at his older brother.

'She is loosing our child and I know where that will put her through…'

'Oh God!' Nathan had shocked.

'I won't make her feel more pain, because of me! I have to end this!'

Peter pulled back of his brother and entered from the room and the mansion. Nathan was in shock. He couldn't react. He never meant to hurt his brother. He loved him. He just wanted to give him a lesson. Then, Nathan froze. Peter was truly convinced that he had to die. If he found Denko… Nathan picked up the phone.

'Vice President?' he heard Denko's voice in the receiver.

'You are not touching my brother, you understand?' he said with firm voice. 'If something happens to him, I'll put you responsible!'

Denko made short pause.

'I understand!'

'Good!' Nathan hung up the phone; just to herd it ringed again.

'Hallo?'

'Nathan, is it Peter there?' it was his mother.

'Ma? He was here, but he ran away few minutes ago…'

'He is going to kill himself!' Angela sound concerned.

'I know. He asked me to kill him…'

'Oh God!'

'I didn't and he ran away!'

'You know that he'll try until he succeeds…' her voice trembled. Nathan knew. He remembered.

Peter was 23 years old when it first happened. It was his first attempt. He had cut his veins and Nathan had found him staring at his blood on the floor. They barely succeeded to help him. The reason then was that he had failed with his attempt to save one little girl in the hospital. Peter blamed himself, as usual. The second time was when he had lost one of his girlfriends. She was young and full of life. They had car crash and Peter had survived, but she hadn't. He blamed himself again and this time, he had tried to jump from one building. When Nathan had stopped him, Peter cut his veins again.

When Peter finally had found his purpose on his life and had thrown himself from that building, Nathan had thought that his depression is came back. But it wasn't. Peter truly was special. He was important. He was… happy then! And when he had found Claire… Nathan closed his eyes. He never had seen Peter so dedicated to someone. He had opened his heart again.

'Nathan!'

'I'm here! I don't know how I could find him…'

Angela sighed.

'I'll take care and I'll call you when I have the news!'

Petrelli Beach House, NY

Angela threw desperate look at Claire. She had fallen in unconsciousness, but her body was in pain. She breathed heavily and she tossed on the bed. Her temperature was extremely high and Angela had concerned for her life too. How the Hell, that happened? Why? It wasn't fair! It wasn't…

'We need Peter!' Mohinder said rushing in the room.

'Why?' Angela threw him a look. "I thought that he can't heal…'

'It isn't Claire!' Mohinder shock his head. 'It's the baby!'

'How? I mean she is just in the second month…'

'Do you want me to explain?' Mohinder sounded irritated. 'Alex's blood couldn't help. We need the blood of the baby's father also! Only then, Claire and the baby could have some chance for survival…'

Angela closed her eyes and sighed.

'Peter is missing…' she whispered.

'Then we have to find him quickly!' Mohinder rushed out from the room.