Chapter 36- The Wreckage
EPOV
I felt my heart pounding in my ears as I ran out into the woods, away from there, away from those papers. I needed to be numb; I need to forget what the hell I just saw. Bella wouldn't do this to me; she wouldn't do this to me. But right there…right in front of me those papers. She was so wrapped into him that she didn't even know. But she is working it out in therapy. Is that what she has been talking to her therapist about? Is that why she hasn't been telling me what has been going on in her sessions?
I ran to the spot where I had once found Bella playing the guitar with her arm bleeding. This had become a frequent spot over the last few years. And I kept certain things here too. I moved the rock out of the way that was right next to the bridge. It was where I kept my secret stash; my dad would kill me if he ever found that in his house.
I took a hit. I need to feel calm I need to not think. I just needed to be numb. If this was true, that Bella was still in love with James, I wasn't going to be all right.
I took another hit. I had to do everything in my power to keep Bella away from that monster. Even if it meant helping my sister and Rose out. I couldn't lose her. I won't let her fall into his mind games again. Another hit. He hurt her in the most disturbing ways, hell they had a child together, and he left her after she lost that child.
Taking another hit I started to feel light and good again.
"Edward? Edward?" I heard Jasper then. He finally saw me and I saw the sadness fill him. He was going to try and stop me from reverting back to what I used to do. But I needed this more than he thought. I need to be free of the pain. Even when I had Bella, I still hurt because of her. Because of her mixed up feelings. But it's okay. Because now I am finally numb.
JPOV
I took Edward to Emmett's. I knew he would be safe there. And I knew that Bella wasn't at the house right now. She was in Seattle. Perks of having a sister and girlfriend that stalk her every move.
I needed to tell Emmett. I had to. I didn't want to betray Rose and Ali's trust, but they left me no choice in the matter. They were hurting everyone in their path they were hurting our family. I wasn't about to stand for it.
Emmett came rushing out; I am assuming he heard us from the backyard. Edward was laughing loud. The neighborhood could probably hear.
Emmett shook his head waving us in. "Get him inside. I'll get the food going. Bring him into the living room and turn on the video."
Sadly we had a system for when Edward would get like this. We played old videos from when we were kids. It helped Edward to focus for some reason. He left connected and would stay quiet. Emmett would cook him a snack that Bella would always make, nachos with beans and meat.
"How many hits did he take?" Emmett whispered. He was looking at Edward concerned. We both had seen him this way, way too many times in the last past few years. All thanks to that wretch Tanya. She knew how to take advantage of a situation.
I sighed, "I'm not sure. He was probably alone for five minutes so he had to have taken at least a few hits. I'm not sure." I felt my heart pounding. I had to tell him. He needed to know.
"Em-" I began.
"I can't believe he is getting like this again," Emmett said shaking his head sadly. "I thought with Bella in his life again he would finally be on the right track. He was doing so well ever since Bella's accident. What the hell triggered him, man?" He was looking at me now.
I sighed, "Rose, Tanya, and Alice." I was looking down. I didn't want to see his face as I told him this. "They somehow got a hold of one of Bella's songs that she wrote, and told Edward that it was written about James." I knew I had to tell him everything I had to keep going, "They also got a hold of Bella's phone bill. There was a random number on there, they don't know whose number it was but they told Edward that it was James too.'" I felt free. Finally, people were telling the truth.
"What?" Emmett scream whispered. I'm assuming not to startle Edward out of his trance. I finally looked up at him. "You're telling me that Rose is in on this?" I saw the pain fill his eyes. I know Rose had told him that she wouldn't do this anymore. That she was going to stop because she didn't want to hurt him anymore. The jig is up.
"Yes. They wanted to keep Edward in their mess, to keep tabs on Bella and find out what it is that you guys are hiding." I sighed relieved.
Emmett's eyes got big. "Edward has been in on it the whole time?"
I felt my eyes get big, "You-you mean you guys never knew that Edward was involved?" Wow. They had done a really good job so that Edward was never suspected.
Emmett gripped onto his hair, shaking his head. "Oh my god, oh my god. No, no, no, no, no. Bella no." His eyes were frantic. "We can't tell Bella that Edward is involved."
I looked at him shocked, "What? Emmett, we have to tell her-"
"No." Emmett glared at me. "If she knows that Edward betrayed her…god, I don't know what she would do. He is the one person that she thinks can do no wrong. She trusts him more than any other human being in the world. If we tell her this… I don't think she will survive." He looked at me with pleading eyes.
I felt my heart sink hearing him say that. Edward and Bella were both linked to each other in the worst kind of way. They depended on one another in the worst way. They had one another on a pedestal, hoping that the other will save them. I knew right then and there that they were doomed. The only question is, who would be the one that falls.
AngelaPOV
To say it was heard keeping my eyes off of Ben while Bella was talking about new music was difficult. She had invited me to come along to the studio; she wanted me to get a feel of what it would be like recording in the studio.
The second that Bella mentioned Edward though my eyes shot to her. She was talking about this song call Mine. I felt my heart racing. Bella knew my feelings about Edward. Not long ago before the dance, I talked to her about him.
Two Months Ago…
Bella was saying goodbye to Edward by the gym. Ever since she came here we have gotten a lot closer then we were as kids. We were friends than for sure, but now it was different. Bella has become like a sister to me. And watching her get involved with Edward…I had to do something about it. I couldn't let her get hurt.
She kissed him goodbye then she walked over to me smiling like a fool. She was in love. I could see it. I tried to smile as she started talking about the show. She had asked me to be the lead guitarist. She had had one too many guitarists, but no one ever stuck. All the other band members did but that person. She said she felt it was fate, that she had been waiting for me to come be her guitarist. I remember laughing because she had never heard me play before. She just stayed quiet smiling. Like she knew something I didn't.
"So…Bella." I looked ahead as we got to her car. "What's going on with you Edward?" I glanced at her and saw her forehead crinkle at my question.
"Well… it's new." Bella said hesitantly, "We decided to start dating." She shook her head laughing, "I must be crazy to do this, I mean I am no good for him, but there is just something that always keeps on pulling me back in."
I wanted to laugh when she said that she was no good for him! Ha! If only she knew what was going on while she wasn't here. I hesitated before I proceeded.
"Bella… I'm happy for you that you're happy going into this…" I trailed off.
"But?" She looked at me slightly nervous. I didn't want to tell her everything because Edward needed to tell her in his own time, but I had to warn her.
I sighed, "There are just some things that you don't know about Edward. He isn't the same as he used to be when you were here." I looked at her sadly, "He was into the party life while you were gone and he has done some things…" I trailed off thinking of the night at one of the parties here where he and Tanya started getting it on in the living room of the party. I shuddered. "I am sure he's not proud of what he's done, but Bella I have to say I don't think Edward will be good for you." I said sadly, "He is nothing but trouble ever since you left. And I don't know if it is something that will go away now that you are here, but I want you to be careful." I felt the anger rise up in me thinking of Edward getting her into the trouble that he used to get into. I thank god Chief Swan wasn't alive to be arresting him the night he got drunk on school property…
She looked at me completely confused but nodded and agreed that she would be careful. By the look on her face, she wanted to understand what it was that Edward had done, more along the lines of what he hasn't done really.
Ever since then Bella has been hesitant in talking to me about Edward. I told her not to be, I didn't want her to think she couldn't talk to me about what's going on in her life. She didn't want to upset me anymore with Edward talk.
I wanted to ring Rosalie and Alice's necks when I found out what they were doing to poor Bella. I remember she cried when she told me; she just couldn't handle it. And I don't blame her at all. I wouldn't know how to respond if I found out my best friends were spying on me and trying to find out my secrets.
She ended up telling me what they were searching for. The truth of it all. She got so upset because she wants to tell them the truth of what happened but she just doesn't trust them anymore. I held her as she cried when she told me it all. I cried too. I can't imagine going through all her and Emmett have gone through. When she told me she decided to see a therapist I was overjoyed. She really needed this.
Listening to her play the song about her and Edward I wanted to scream. There was something about Edward was keeping from Bella and I could feel it. He was just going to hurt her somehow and I just wasn't sure how but I felt it. I had noticed him at school lately. He was talking to Alice, Rose, and Tanya. Talking a lot to Tanya in fact. I don't want him to hurt her anymore.
I had talked to Ben about it a while ago. He had felt the same vibe. He thought Edward was a good guy and all but he felt something was wrong with him, especially since recently. He felt that he was trying to use Bella in a way. Then I told him everything with Rose and Alice and he got pissed. He knew instantly that Edward was helping them out.
I don't know what to do. To protect Bella, I wanted to talk to Emmett, but I didn't know how to go about it. It was such a hard subject to bring up. But then I think of how this is really none of my business. I mean I care for Bella, she has become like a sister to me, but this is not my place to step in. All I can do is share my opinion with her on the situation and hope that things work out for the best. And if I find something out I tell her right away. I can't work around her and keep secrets from her because that's how it all started between Rose, Alice and her. I don't want that happening between the two of us. She is someone I plan on having in my life forever.
Edward walked in then and I felt my eyes bulged when I stared at his face. He was high.
I felt my heart raising and I looked to Bella. She hadn't noticed. She just smiled and gave him a kiss hello. I felt my heart drop. There was something wrong, there was something seriously wrong. And think I knew who to blame.
Tanya.
TPOV
Finally. Finally! I was getting my Edward back. The wild crazy carefree Edward. Bella was no good for him. She was trapping him and keeping him from joining the party. I will him soon. He already came to me to buy pot. I know that he will be crawling back soon enough.
I think about the past few years that we have spent together and I think of how happy I was with him by my side. We were the 'it' couple. Everyone wanted to be us and wanted what we had. The popularity, the money, and I know he is loaded as am I. Bella may have the fame right now, but soon she will be out of the limelight if it's the last thing I do. She won't be the 'it' girl of the world, I will. That's my plan after high school. Go to LA and become a famous actress. And with Edward by my side, I will have the world eating out of the palm of my hand.
I can't do it without him. The moment that Bella left this town was the best thing that ever happened to me. Sure I know that Edward has always had feelings for her. I'm not stupid, but I had him because she was gone. And he will stay with me again once she is gone because he can't be alone. Because then he is reminded of the absence of her. So if I can just get enough information about Bella to drive Edward insane he will run her right out of town himself.
And I won't even get my hands dirty. Because Rose and Alice will do that for me. They will take the shots at her and rip her apart. I won't even have to lift a finger.
It's all going according to plan.
EPOV
I was trying to look for something in Bella's eyes. A sign or something to tell me if she loves me or not.
She looked at me through as she always does, with that same love and happiness. But I saw something. Sadness? Fear? Was she finally planning on telling me the truth? So that I could finally be free of this torment?
When I walked into the studio I felt alright until I saw her. I felt good until I saw Bella. And the reason why is because I know now that she loves two people. And that love for all I know will never just go to me. It will always be split. Because she has a connection to him and she always will. They almost had a child together. They almost got married. She was planning a life with him.
How could I compete with that?
I wanted the full life with Bella. I wanted us to have kids, to get married, to grow old together. But I don't know if I could do that knowing that she loved someone else. I can't deal with a relationship where there are three people in it. Now I understood why she wanted to wait for us to be together. She knew she wasn't over James, so she wanted to give us our best shot at figuring out what is going on in her mind. Why do I never listen to her? Why couldn't I just be her friend and be supportive through this while she figured it all out? I am always so impulsive, I want what I want right now. I have no patience.
I can't get out of this now, though, I couldn't let her go now once I have tasted what being with her is like. We haven't taken that step in our relationship yet, but just having her around and having her be there for me in a loving way and taking her out on dates and getting to know her more than I ever could have imagined to, I can't let that go. I need her like I need air. She is my life. She has always been, but now I can't get enough.
I need just a little help to survive this though so. What could it hurt by asking Tanya for a few things to numb the pain?
A/N: So sorry it has been so long since I have posted. But I think you all have enjoyed this chapter quite a bit. And it gets crazier from here on out. So brace yourselves. Share your thoughts!
Love
BellaLaila87