Yolo! Well, today there is no school since it's MLK day, so here I am typing up a new chapter for 'Love the Way You Lie'! Yay, more writing before I go back to classes tomorrow, thank God for this! Hmm, question on my mind right now: will the Jhay, unlike the Jagan, get some positive feedback in later chapters? Or will it receive mixed response like the Jagan? Hmm, interesting question but thank you to those who reviewed! I really appreciate it; I was having a hard time coming up with this story's next couple of chapters and sometimes I feel like it's not doing so well, but the fact everyone is still reading and giving their opinion and support makes me realize I'm not failing at this story! And that's good, because then I keep going! With my inner will, and everyone's support so thank you again and enjoy this hurt/comfort/romance chapter, all Kames! Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush! All I own is the story's plot, nothing else sadly! :( Oh, also the same song by My Darkest Days that inspired the first chapter Shay made an appearance was used for this chapter as well! I highly recommend the song, 'Save Yourself'; it's really good, and it portrays really well the feelings James has for Kendall, and the feelings Shay has for James! Again enjoy, hope this chapter was good enough! :)

James was curled up on his bed, sheets and blankets under him as he had his left cheek pressed to the tops of his knees. His arms were wrapped tightly around his legs, he in a pair of black sweats and a matching long-sleeve. He had on black socks and his soft hazel-green eyes were closed; it looked like he was sleeping with a prostrate back, but he was everything but asleep.

"Jamie?" Said brunette opened his eyes and lifted his head. Kendall was in his bedroom doorway, facial expression very worried. His bright green eyes were back to normal, they weren't as dark. They were normally a very lively shade of bottle green. But when James had blacked out and saw those eyes, they seemed closer to an olive tone, which only happened when the dirty blonde was deeply upset about something.

'No, it wasn't Kendy I saw before I blacked out. The shade of his eyes were all wrong, but if it wasn't him...t-then who...?' James felt dizzy now, head spinning.

He remembered seeing someone, with wild dirty blonde hair, thick eyebrows and deep green eyes like Kendall with him, outside in the rain. When he had ran out of the hospital after the painful realization of his mother having no memory of anything, he had collapsed in an alley (mentally flinching that it eerily resembled the one he had hid out in the night Kendall found him all beaten and bloody) and barely breathing, afraid he was literally dying from a broken heart. He had been barely breathing and conscious when someone came from the dark and saved him, kept him out of the rain and took him back to his boyfriend and family.

The warmth from that person had felt familiar, but when he had caught a glimpse of the person's face, well more his eyes, before he blacked out...James could have sworn it had been Kendall. It wouldn't be the first time the shorter boy had come to his rescue; he's been saving James' ass for quite a while, but his savior had not been Kendall. It had been a total stranger, a stranger with eyes that were nearly identical to his loving boyfriend's, and James was surprised he hadn't felt terror. He was surprised he hadn't felt terror feeling safe in an stranger's embrace; he was surprised he was feeling grateful to this mysterious boy, and that he wanted to find out who he was.

But now, he was feeling guilty. Kendall has put his neck out on the line for him, and all he ever did was screw everything up.

"I'm sorry." James said, finally responding to Kendall.

Said blonde looked confused as he sat down next to his beautiful lover on the bed, James leaning into his right shoulder. "Why are you apologizing? You ran out because you were hurt; y-your mom, Doctor Griffin said the amnesia might just be temporarily but right now it's hard to tell without doing some tests."

"I'm apologizing for being a failure."

"A failure?" Kendall echoed, a still confused look on his face but it was now mixed with annoyance; he hated when James was too hard on himself, well hard on himself in general.

None of this was his fault. He had a perfectly good reason to want to be alone; his mom he had spent four years waiting for wasn't the same, wasn't his mom. She was a stranger, a stranger with a face he's known since the day he was born. A face he loved, but that held no love for him back.

"Yeah, a failure. I keep r-running away from things, I duck and run when I know it won't do anything good for me. My dad and Connie are coming back tomorrow; Auntie said they'll be here as soon as we come back from school. Michael the Beast is back in the states tomorrow, and I have to face him as much as I don't want to. If I keep running away, how will I be strong enough for the trial in less than two months? How will I be strong for you, for our families, for my mom and myself if I keep running away?" James asked, eyes locked still with Kendall's as he soon folded his legs meditation-style.

Kendall sighed and wrapped one arm around his taller boyfriend, gently stroking the skin of his right arm. "You know therapy will help with that, right? Your resolve doesn't have to become a steel wall overnight, beautiful. Everything takes its time to work out."

"I know, I know. But still, he will be here tomorrow no doubt demanding explanation and throwing out accusations. Kendall, my father isn't the friendliest guy around. In fact, he's as friendly as Michael Myers; they call him Casper the Friendly Ass-hole Ghost, and that speaks for itself. He's a jerk, self-absorbed, a man obsessed with his image and status to others. I'm the biggest failure of the family to him: I'm not straight, I'm not a total sports fanatic, and I don't have anything in common with him. He and I are complete opposites, strangers with the same blood. I know therapy will help me built my resolve, but tomorrow is tomorrow. I have no choice but face him and Connie tomorrow, and take his heat on my own." James said, wrapping his arms around Kendall's neck.

The blonde stiffened, back rigid. "Wait, what do you mean on your own? James, you're seriously not thinking of handling him by yourself right? H-he could eat you alive, no I'm not letting you face him on your own!" He protested, heart pounding hard against his ribs at the thought. James tilted his head so their eyes met again, expression...fierce.

Fierce and not angry at Kendall, but more of a fierceness associated with self-frustration.

"No Kendall, I'm not having you or Auntie there with me when I see them again. Listen to me, please: this is a battle I have to do alone. I'm not doing this because of pride or anything stupid like that, but because I've let my dad push me around for far too long. He needs to see that I'm not going to let anyone mess with me, him especially. I appreciate you always being there for me, but there are some fights I'm going to have to win, or lose, alone." James said, stroking Kendall's left cheek.

Kendall knew, deep down, James was right. If he was to break free of his father's oppressing shadow then he'd have to call the shots himself, not back down and take anymore heat. Still, the blonde didn't want James to face anything alone...

"Still, I just can't let the person I lo-I mean, the person I care so much about face the Friendly Ass-hole Ghost alone, James..." Kendall whispered, sighing and closing his eyes. His cheeks were streaked with red, he hoping James didn't notice the heat biting at his face in the dim light.

'Damn it, I almost said the L-word! James isn't ready for that yet, pull yourself together and wait for him to be comfortable with that again!' Kendall scolded himself hotly, though he gasped when James pressed his lips to his in a gentle, yet passionate kiss.

'H-he almost said he l-loved me!' James thought, mind reeling now.

Of course they have been together for a little less than a month, but...he would be lying if he said he hadn't been contemplating that word when thinking about Kendall.

He's never needed someone so much before, and it was terrible because the right thing for him to do would be to give Kendall up. The dirty blonde was the guardian angel God sent him to be saved; he'd be fucking dead right about now if he hadn't found him that night roughly a year ago! James was sick, twisted bastard inside; he an illness no one would be able to understand, not even Kendall. He knew that even if he has made Kendall's the happiest he's ever been, he's always caused him pain. Always running away, breaking down and backing out. That's not what a good boyfriend does.

So James was determined to fix that; he was going to make things right. Kendall wouldn't run away from him, the demon that he has fallen in love with, and James was too selfish to give the other boy up even if it was right thing for him so now he was going to take charge.

He was going to be the one to protect Kendall, instead of the other way around.

"I-I...you know, the L-word is getting easier to hear now. And it's getting easier to play around with, when t-thinking of you." James whispered when he pulled away, eyes gentle and very warm; the bits of golden-red mixed with his natural hazel-green eyes, making them look like pools of blended jewels. Kendall could have sworn his heart skipped a beat at looking into those eyes.

"R-really?"

"Yeah, really. We both can't...s-say right now, because it's still too soon but I think I'm feeling it for you." James said, blushing a fiery red.

"Me too...I think I'm feeling the same way." Kendall replied with a soft smile, able to fight his blush down.

They soon hugged each other tightly, breathing in each other's scent to beat away the haunting thoughts of what was to come tomorrow after school.

'The fight's just starting, but we'll be okay.' Kendall thought, determination burning in his torso now.

'I'll have to face my dad alone. N-no, don't be scared, you can do this; it's about time you let Michael Diamond know a thing or two about you, James. It's time to show him who you really are, and that you're not the weak, scared little kid he's always played you as.' James thought, gripping Kendall's shoulders and burying his face into his swan neck.

He'd have to worry about the mysterious boy later. Right now, he had to prep himself mentally and emotionally for what was to come.