Chapter 36:

Oh god, I'm horrible at this (writing in general). Love you all :)

Tris woke with a start. A too familiar feeling was rising in her stomach and climbing up her throat. She ran for the bathroom but wasn't able to get anything out. She sat, dry heaving, until her throat was raw. The room had begun to spin and shift in and out of focus. She shook her head and cleared her mind. The clarity didn't last long. The slow, unfocused spinning began again, and Tris could feel herself losing balance. She stumbled from the bathroom and into her room. Managing to grab the handle of the door and swing herself into the hallway, she found it impossible to move silently. She had lost awareness of her surroundings and her own actions, letting her feet drag her wherever they would go. Soon, she was standing in front of two doors, most likely locked.

After much struggling and confusion, she had pried the doors open. She wasn't even sure how she did it, she just...did. She wasn't sure of anything anymore, but she still let her feet lead the way. She heard distant footsteps. She had to hurry. She grabbed what she had come for, shoving it under her shirt. She stumbled back out the door, managing to relock them just in time. She raced down the hall, aware of her footsteps echoing softly. But she was confused. And lost. She didn't know where she was. Or what the date was. Or who she was. All she knew was that if she stopped running, something bad would happen. Stopping=bad. Simple. But not for someone who didn't know her own fucking name. She flung open a random door that her feet halted in front of, half-surprised to see a breathing, alive figure across the room. Thankfully, it was not stirred by the racket, moving only to avoid the dim light seeping through the doorway.

Tris sighed and stuffed the item hastily under some sweatshirts on the top shelf of the closet. She couldn't stay longer. She really felt sick. She raced out the door, hoping to end up in a bathroom, but ended up finding herself back in the hallway. The footsteps were growing louder but were relatively slow. The room was spinning faster, forcing Tris onto the ground. Tris looked down and managed to catch a glimpse of her shirt in the moonlight. There was a dark stain on the pale grey of the stomach. Blood. It was pretty, it'd been awhile since Tris had last seen her own blood. She let out a low chuckle. But it was a chuckle that rang throughout an entire body, created tsunamis on the other side of the world, pierced the heart of anyone who dared listen.

That was the last thing Tris did before the world turned black, and the darkness enclosed her.

Four was pretty sure something was wrong. He had woken up suddenly, stale tears dried in a path streaming down his cheeks. He wiped his face and turned to his one source of comfort. That wasn't there. He knew something was definitely wrong when he searched the bathroom, finding it vacant. The sun had not yet risen, but a shallow light drifted in from the falling moon. The room was empty. Four's nightmare had come true again. He was alone. But what really worried him was the mysterious case of the missing roommate. He knew the strict rules of curfew and when he was permitted out of his room. Four thought he wasn't willing to risk it, but she was gone and Four was alone, so...something wasn't right.

Four silently slid open the door, half scared of being caught, and half scared of what he might find. He was ready to go after a series of breathing exercises that Dr. Pedrad had taught him. One thing Dr. Pedrad was good for. He dashed out, almost slipping on the too-clean tile floors. He had not traveled more than a few hallways before he spotted what he had been dreading.

Before him lay a crumpled body, alive but barely breathing. The shirt was stained with blood, the head hanging at an awkward angle. The face was illuminated by the moonlight, setting a creepy, pale glow. Four was standing at the other end of the hallway, but he couldn't move his feet. He heard footsteps and turned, only to be blinded by a flashlight. He had been caught. But that didn't matter. The security guard was yelling at him, but he didn't hear it. He didn't see the light anymore, all he saw was his companion, or what was left of her. He did the only thing he could think to do. He ran.

The security guard was faster than he had calculated. Within a few seconds, Four was tackled. But the security guard didn't know he wasn't running away but only running to another person. The security guard tried to get him to his feet, yelling at him. But Four only struggled to get closer to his destination. The guard twisted his arms painfully behind his back, but Four fought. He squirmed and kicked and tried so hard. All he wanted was to save his friend. The security guard was stronger than him. He had an iron grip that never relented. But Four didn't give up, his determination pulsing through him. He was able to kick free of the grip, but he hadn't made it far before his face slammed into the tile once again. This time, the security guard kept most of his weight on top of Four's body. Four struggled beneath the crushing force, switching between kicking and squirming. He managed to get to his feet, breathing heavily. He ran as hard as he could, carefully placing one foot in front of the other, sure that he would make it. But hands wrapped around his stomach, sending him flying backwards and back to where he had started. On the ground. Being crushed. He didn't stop struggling until he heard what the security guard was saying for the first time.

"Give it up, kid. You'll never get out of here."

Those words crushed Four. He stopped struggling altogether, afraid to even think. He didn't want to think, he didn't want to process anything, he didn't want to save anyone anymore. He was done. Just as done as he had been on his birthday the year before.

"What's your name, kid?"

Four didn't answer. He couldn't. He was an idiot who forgot his stupid notebook in his room.

He was stranded on an island in the middle of the silent hallway. The security guard had backed off of him after realizing that he wasn't going to run. He stood up and stretched out a hand to pull Four up. Four still didn't move from his spot, so the guard started walking toward the side of the hallway that they had entered from.

"Come on, kid. Let's go; it's past midnight."

Four was staring straight ahead at the body. It was now invisible in the shadows, the moonlight shifting and fading into slow sunshine.

"Come on, kid. Last warning before I'm picking up and dragging you." By now, he was standing about fifteen feet away. Four's mind finally set off a trigger. In one motion, he stepped off the ground and sprinted the last thirty feet to his destination. The guard lagged a few seconds, but he eventually caught up. Not before Four was able to get to her. The guard was heading straight for Four, but he lost his balance when the boy halted suddenly in the corner. The guard tumbled down, flicking on his flashlight to see the boy. But he didn't see one pretty fucked up teenager, he saw two pretty fucked up teenagers and eyes that were almost spilling over with tears.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

"Shut that fucking alarm clock off, Caleb. Do it, or I will end you." The last thing Tris wanted right then was to open her eyes. Sleep was such a nice option, very reliable and helpful, at that. But the last thing the universe wanted right then was for Tris to be happy. So it put her in a pickle. Caleb wasn't turning off the alarm clock, and Tris couldn't sleep if she 1) opened her eyes and 2) turned off the alarm herself and 3) there was a fucking alarm clock-

Beep. Beep. Beep.

"Just fucking turn it off, already! I don't need your shit this morning, okay? I had a bad dream and I need more..."

Tris didn't finish her sentence. She was determined to keep her eyes closed. No way was she getting up now.

"Caleb?"

Her one word of hope got no response. Tris sighed and drifted back to sleep. She needed another hour of sleep before she could even begin thinking about thinking.