I feel so weird wearing clothes like this, Tino thought to himself as he pulled on a silk evening jacket and readjusted the top hat on his head. I don't think fancy stuff really suits me.

But Tino was aware that he really had no right to be complaining, especially considering what Berwald was changing into in the next room over.

"How am I supposed t' put this shirt on?" Berwald mumbled from the other side of the door. "Has no hole for the head, just these ruffled sleeves."

"No hole for the head?"

"Yah. Can only put m' arms through."

"Ya-wait...Sheriff, is it possible that those are bloomers?"

The sound of rustling fabric behind the door stopped.

"...Bloomers?" Berwald repeated.

"Yah, they're...ah, kind of like under drawers for women folk. They go on your legs, not really a good shirt or anything."

*Uncomfortable silence*

"That makes more sense."

The rustling of fabric resumed. Tino swallowed and walked anxiously around in circles as he waited. The moment Mayor Jones had said that the person who went would need a lady friend, Tino knew that one of them was going to have to disguise as a woman in order to get into the regional aristocracy ball.

What Tino did not expect was for Berwald to be the one putting a dress on.

"Er...are ya sure?" Tino had asked with eyes as wide as the Great Lakes. "I mean, um, not that I'm going to fight ya for the opportunity, but don't ya think you're a bit tall? Taller than most women, I mean."

"Yer th' better conversationalist. Whichever one of us disguises as a lady will have t' keep silent."

"Silent? Why?"

"Because th' both of us have masculine voices, so whoever plays th' woman can't let his voice be heard. You'll have t' tell people that yer wife has laryngitis 'nd temporarily lost her voice."

Whoa, Berwald is going to be my wife? And he thinks my voice is masculine? Oh, nobody has ever said to me that my voice was masculine...or that they were going to be my wife, now that I think about it.

And that's when Tino decided that he agreed with the plan, even if he was still completely confused about all this.

Berwald had other reasons for making this decision that he did not explain to Tino.

The first one was he was convinced that Tino in a dress would be so irresistible that all the men in the party would try to do less than chaste things to the disguised deputy. And then Berwald would have to kill each and every one of them, which is not the way a protector of the people wants to spend an evening.

The second reason was that if Berwald was disguised as a woman then it would be socially acceptable for him to slap anybody who tried to woo Tino, regardless of their gender. Hopefully it wouldn't come to that though. Hopefully they'd all be deterred by Berwald's death stare and the only people who would need to be clobbered that evening were the four henchmen of Sin Nombre Hombre.

"Th' strings on th' waist thing confuse m'."

"Waist thing? Oh, do ya mean the corset?"

"Guess so. How do they expect m' t' reach all th' strings in th' back?"

"I think you're actually supposed to have someone else lace it up for ya-" Tino paused.

Should I-?

No! The demon hissed. No, bad plan. Bad BAD plan.

Demon's idea of a bad BAD plan = Nice people's idea of a good GOOD plan. Question answered.

"D-do ya want me to help ya put it on?" Tino stammered as the demon made retching sounds in protest.

"Nh-" even Berwald with his flat tone could not keep the nervous reluctance out of his voice "Suppose there's no other choice..."

There's absolutely another choice! the evil spirit growled as Tino nervously stumbled into the room and nearly fell back into the door when he caught sight of Berwald in bloomers. You can choose to not do stupid things like this and instead shoot everybody in the entire town. Hey! Hey, are you even listening?

Tino was not listening. He was too entranced by the marvelous muscles on Berwald's back. His hands shook like crazy as he fumbled over the corset strings. The sound of his own ridiculously fast heartbeat echoed so loudly in his skull that it made his ears hurt. Tino was trying not to remember the fantasies he'd had about softly kissing that beautifully sculpted back and feeling Berwald shiver at his touch. Tino was failing miserably (joyously?) in this regard.

Quick! Start talking or something, maybe then this will be less awkward! Tino told himself. Just say something, anything!

"Do ya want to maybe go get drinks together after this or something?" Tino blurted out without thinking it through first. His cheeks became as rosy as the reddest of wines as he realized the unfortunate insinuations that statement could possibly carry. "Er, I mean-"

"Yah. I would like t' drink a lot after this mission is done actually," Berwald replied "Wouldn't regret drinkin' so much that I didn't remember th' night I had t' dress in women's clothes."

"Tee hee!" Tino laughed as he finished lacing up the corset "Yah, I could understand that! Geez, the things we do on these missions just get weirder and weirder, don't they?"

"Yah, they do," Berwald acknowledged as he started pull a frilly dress over his head. "It's 'lright though. Don't mind doing it t' help m' good friend."

G-good f-friend? Tino clutched a hand to his heart as Berwald finished putting on his disguise. I'm a good friend to him and not just some annoying guy who made his job harder? Oh this is wonderful. It's…I can't believe it!

When Berwald's disguise was complete, anyone else would've seen the sheriff as an extremely tall woman. Tino, however, saw the sheriff as a noble knight in gleaming armor, his loyal protector who would do anything, even embarrassing things, to help Tino out.

What a man, Tino thought to himself as he suppressed a winsome sigh of admiration, I've never known anybody who was more of a man in my entire life!