Oh my dear sweet lord, I am so sorry. My whole computer crashed and died. All of 36 and most of 37 were done on it so I didn't want to rewrite the whole thing over AGAIN—yes, I said again, and so you guys were stuck waiting for me to have enough money to fix the whole thing. So sorry. This chapter is dedicated to FallenAngelKiya and her patient pestering of me that finally got my rear in gear. See profile for further apologies and some detailed info about the upcoming finale. Also sorry if this is a little less polished than most of the previous chapter but it was so long I couldn't revise it all in one go so I had to do it in pieces which is hard. I figured you guys would just rather I post the darn thing then re-re-reread and re-re-revise it.

Chapter 36: Admissions

For once Rin woke up before Sesshoumaru. She could feel his sleeping form pressing against her back. He was very territorial, even in his sleep. Through the whole night fifteen minutes wouldn't pass where he wasn't holding her, touching her, or entangled with her. She smiled lazily and squinted into the light.

A thick layer of snow had fallen the previous night and the whole world was blindingly bright. Even the bedroom's thick shades didn't keep enough out for Rin to continue sleeping past 10 in the morning. She grimaced; it was Sunday, after all. Isn't Sunday supposed to be the day of rest?

Predictably Sesshoumaru began to stir. He was a demon. Even the slight unevenness of her breaths roused him quickly. He was the lightest sleeper in the world. This often caused her to feel bad. Every twitch, scratch, and bathroom break she had in the night woke him instantly. A few nights ago he had eased her consciousness by explaining that for him sleep was more or less recreational. He didn't need more than an hour or two a night. He also mentioned that it made him feel better to know exactly what she was doing through the night, even if it was just dreamy twitches and scratches. This had made her blush madly.

She rolled over to face her lover. He was already looking perfectly awake and alert. She was sure her eyes were still glazed and there was probably crust on them or something gross like that. It wasn't fair that he was constantly effortlessly inhumanly beautiful. But at least he was hers. For some reason he wanted her despite her bed head and eye crust. She smiled beatifically at him. She was so infinitely lucky.

"What?" Sesshoumaru asked, unsure of the source of her grin.

"Nothing. Just a good morning." She answered shyly.

"How so?" He continued his interrogation, naturally curious, his face still inches away from hers.

"I love you." She whispered, by now miles away in the amber depth of his eyes.

She could see the flurry of synapses and electrical currents in his brain, firing away to process this. He was silent for a while. Rin remained unalarmed. For Sesshoumaru, quiet was as good as of a sign as any. And unless she was imagining things, his face was creeping forward millimeters at a time. There was an emotion in his eyes, though she wouldn't try to imagine just what kind.

It was a constant mystery, trying to figure out what he was thinking. So she stopped trying. More than often enough, she could tell how he felt, angry, happy, hungry, irritable… But she would never be able to decode everything that went on behind those amber screens. And she wouldn't want to. To do so would be to change part of what made Sesshoumaru… Sesshoumaru.Eventually he blinked slowly, breathing in her scent deeply.

"And I love you." He sighed so softly she might have imagined it. But she knew she hadn't.

Rin glowed with effervescent joy. She quickly pecked him on the cheek before hopping out of bed. Her utter happiness had filled her with new energy. She was in heaven, paradise, Eden… whatever you wanted to call it. Today she would be with Sesshoumaru and so today she would be happy.

Rin skipped to his bathroom and slid the shower door open. After disrobing she turned the knob deftly and the hot water spouted at her from all sides. The doors were already opaque with steam and mist by the time she hopped in. She glanced at the bottles in the shower caddy. Sesshoumaru's shampoos and soap were yet another point of interest. How did he maintain that gorgeous silver hair? She could see nothing really unusual with them other than their quality. Rin sniffed them for the umpteenth time. They smelled fantastic, but they were still no explanation for Sesshoumaru's enrapturing male odor. Probably yet another advantage to being a demon.

Rather than washing away her fears, the shower's massaging waters brought them back. Rin did a lot of her best thinking in the shower. And a lot of her most fervent worrying. There was something about the staccato hum of the water spraying, hitting her, and then draining down. The absent minded labor of washing her hair and soaping down allowed her mind to wander freely down into the creeks and crevices of her deepest fears.

She was going to tell Sesshoumaru about her past. Their past. She needed to. It was the right thing to do. She loved him and he deserved to know it all. He'd be angry if she didn't tell him. He was one of those guys who wouldn't tolerate lies even of ones of omission. And eventually, supposing they did defeat Naraku—and she didn't want to consider that they might not—he'd find out what had transpired between them. And he'd probably be pissed that she hadn't told him as much as possible.

But foremostly she wanted to tell him because she loved him. He might have fallen in love with her again in this timeline, but she had fallen in love with him in the previous one. Sure, they might be perfectly happy without considering their original meeting, but she didn't want to lose her past. Her past had been horrible and terrifying, but it had made her what she was today. Had she not been a homeless girl would she have ever met Sesshoumaru? Probably not. True, she might have met lots of other boys if she'd stayed in school and been middle class, but none of them could make up for half of Sesshoumaru.

So that's what she was going to do. Fight for their past. In a sense. Well, in what sense having a serious talk can be considered fighting for anything. It would be difficult. It would be scary. But it would be fine and for the best. Right? They loved each other. Love conquers all. Right? Ugh, she couldn't maintain her nerve in the shower of all places! The shower was her seething and worrying place.

Rin turned the knob hastily, threw the glass door open, and promptly blushed crimson red. Sesshoumaru was at the mirror shaving and the mirror was angled perfectly to see her wet, naked body. She made a grab for the towel but it was on the other side. Sesshoumaru, who was by this time much amused, handed it to her.

"No need to rush I assure you." He chuckled darkly. "Besides, I've seen it before."

"Doesn't mean you'll see it again!" She said as she stuck her tongue out and wrapped the towel firmly around herself.

"I daresay I shall. I could see it again right now if I wanted to." He said with a smile as he turned to her. His face was half covered in shaving cream.

"Nu-uh." She retorted childishly.

"Yes huh." He wiped the remaining shaving cream off his face, turned to face her, and planted a smooth, shaving cream-flavored kiss on her mouth.

Rin submitted instantly to his firm mouth upon hers. Her brain's wiring went into overload any time he touched her. She was lucky to retain enough sense to return his affection. But she did return it and happily so. She felt his hands sliding down her towel-wrapped sides and suddenly his skin was upon her bare flesh. He suddenly stepped back from her, a glorious smirk upon his face. She looked down. He had removed her towel and was gazing upon her nude form with relish. It was always a tremendous surprise to her when he became playful. Oh, sure, they were rare moments, but all the more precious for it.

"You can be sort of a jerk, you know that?" She said with a smile as she rewrapped herself in the towel.

"So I've been told." He replied with dark humor in his eyes as he returned to the mirror.

"What's on today's agenda, then, my Lord the Jerk?" She asked.

"Well, my unnecessarily shy Lady, I don't know. It is Sunday, our last day of repose, so perhaps we ought to make a day out of it." He said with a wolfish grin. He had more of Inuyasha and his father in him than he'd like to admit, she thought."I think that's a fabulous idea." She responded before padding out of the room. It was a good idea. That way she'd be able to pounce and tell him the truth.

Kagome

The little apartment she had leased before she had taken her job at West Oni had become too cramped for her. When she was just a student it had served her purposes just fine, but now that she was on one of the more generous payrolls in all of Tokyo, it seemed ludicrous

To break out of her lease she'd lose her deposit, which was 500 bucks. Back then that had seemed to be a fortune, far too much to lose. But now it seemed like pocket change. It sort of depressed her. Her grandpa had warned her that corporate life would degrade her appreciation for money, her morals, her goals… and it seemed like he was right for the most part.

Kagome hadn't always dreamed of analyzing stats for a Megabucks financing incorporation. Quite the opposite. Back in the beginning and all the way up till a scant few months previously she had dreamed of using her skills to change the world. True, accountants couldn't do much, but she had dreamed of lending her hand to charities on the cheap on helping them turn in some real dough that would conceivably lead directly to a lot of charity. Weird, maybe, but good statistical evaluators/accountant/investors such as herself were a rare breed. Especially if you didn't have a lot of money. As a shrine-keeper's granddaughter Kagome had always been budgeting in charitable donations . She'd always prized her humanitarianism. But as graduation crept closer and the student loan payments were looming overhead her tune had changed a little. And then Inutaisho called her and told her all about this job that paid serious cash and was only going to last for a few months tops...

She flopped onto her twin mattress that had come with her from her old room at the shrine. She had taken the job. Unfortunately, life in this concrete jungle was as muddled, hopeless, and tangled as everyone had warned her. The work she did seemed to do few directly charitable acts. The sad thing about financing was that only the preexistingly rich could get any. It soothed her a little that Inutaisho donated a generous portion of the profits to all sorts of charitable organizations. Actually, West Oni was one of the most philanthropic businesses in the world. But even so, this wasn't what Kagome had been picturing in her high school daydreams.

And yet she didn't regret her decision to accept Inutaisho's offer. She did regret the loss of her naiveté, innocence, and selflessness. But the overlying truth was that one thing made up for all of that over and over again. Inuyasha.

She loved him, probably. She hadn't experienced love before, so she wasn't anxious to declare it as such, but she was almost sure at this point. It was a heady feeling that tore at her insides. Overnight she had become entirely disinterested in anything that didn't involve him. Every aspect of her life showed it.

She only talked to her family when she felt like she needed to talk to her mom about her feelings—normally about Inuyasha. She only thought of work because that's where she spent her time with Inuyasha. The only friends she spent time with outside of work had been pared down to Miroku, Sango, and Shippo because they also knew Inuyasha. She was obsessed. Dangerously? Maybe, was it possible to know exactly when one went across the line?

It was a lucky stroke that she had met him through work, though. Because if she hadn't, who knows if she could have applied herself long enough to get anything done? This way she was at least obsessed with work as much as she was with him because her work was for him. So luckily she spent massive amounts of time focused on her job. It was thanks to this tireless effort that she had become so suspicious. Hours and hours of poring over receipts, logs, and time sheets had led her to the conclusion that Project Shikon had become the host to some sort of terrible financial parasite. What it was exactly was being clouded from her vision. Undeclared capital was coming out and mysterious expenses were being withdrawn. Her only conclusion was that whatever this parasite was, it was illegal. And very likely not to the benefit of West Oni at all.

She had very little evidence. And most of it was transitory and fairly vapid anyway. A lot of it could be explained away due to bad secretaries and typos. But Kagome had this unexplainable bad feeling about it all, like they were all walking into a trap. She had no leads, no explanations, and no hard proof. She only had one suspect: Kikyo.

The woman was clearly running them in circles anyway. She turned in her paperwork late and only half filled in. She showed up for only about half the meetings. And she kept making bizarre demands. Like that all the lab work take place on her property instead of in their accredited labs. And she had some weird preoccupation with Inuyasha.

Sango had filled Kagome in on Inuyasha and Kikyo's whole lurid past. And admittedly Kagome did sometimes wonder if she was just harboring a grudge… but it was beyond that at this point. West Oni was too large and too prestigious a company to be messed with even the slightest.

Kagome sighed. Her cell phone began to ring. With a gaze at the caller ID, her stomach leapt, it was Inuyasha.

"Hello?" She gasped shamefully. He called her frequently; she should seriously start to calm down a little.

"Hey Kagome." He responded as carefree and light as ever. She envied his casualness.

"Hello Inuyasha." She replied. "Is there something you need?" Short and sweet, crisp and to the point...

"Not really. Just wondered what you were up to." He said lightly. Leave it to him to call and then force her to drive the conversation.

"Nothing really. Just looking over some paperwork." Ball is back in his court...

"Oh really? Did you find anything new?" He asked with unfeigned interest.

"Some new leaks, but they're pretty much the same as the others…" She sighed.

"Oh… Well, have you had breakfast yet?" He digressed effortlessly.

"No." She replied simply, afraid of investing emotion in her voice lest it be one of the many she was hoping to hide.

"Me neither. Want to grab something together?" He asked.

"Yes. Sounds great." She feared her voice was high and strained with her efforts of restraint.

"Wonderful. I'm outside your building now." He said before the line clicked off.

Kagome blushed crimson. This whole time he had been on the street below? She flew off her bed and into the bathroom. Some powder and mascara did wonders. Really she needed some serious time, maybe some concealer and eyeliner, but she didn't want to keep him waiting. She shrugged on her pink trench coat and started shuffling down the narrow stairs.

As promised he was parked right outside her building. He was parked in the fire lane. She frowned at him. It was something only he could get away with. She didn't understand it. But there was no changing it. Her only way of expediting her embarrassment was to sprint over to the passenger side and duck in so no one could see that it was her getting into his car.

"Happy to see me?" He asked as she slammed the door behind her.

"No! I just don't want my neighbors to see that I'm the one blocking traffic. You may get away with these stunts but I'm not so lucky." She barked as she tried to catch her breath.

"You're simply jealous. Besides, I don't get away without the consequences. I just don't care about the consequences. There is a difference." He replied.

"Well I do." Kagome hissed. He lowered his eyes.

She immediately regretted her tone. She was being overly harsh. She wasn't even mad about this, she was mad about other things that weren't even his fault. She was mad that Kikyo had been with him. She was mad that she was so flustered over him. She was mad that she was failing to accurately protect and check Project Shikon. She was the exact opposite of mad at him. He turned to her, his eyes apologetic.

"I'm sorry Ka-" She cut him off with a kiss. Not a slobbery, probing one. Just a light, silencing peck. She pulled back almost instantly, afraid that she had crossed the line.

To her immense relief and delight there was a wide grin plastered on his face. It was a wild, feral grin. She loved it because it was a grin only he could have without appearing to be a serial killer. He put the Lexus into gear and sped down the road in his hazardous style. She grinned; she wouldn't want it any other way.

Rin

They pulled up to the curb next to Kohaku's restaurant. Rin had chosen it for their breakfast because it 1. It was a familiar, comforting setting, 2. Perhaps the quaintness of the location would help her story seem less… crazy, and 3. Because they had superb waffles. Kohaku had been glad to see her and had greeted her animatedly. Sesshoumaru looked piqued at the boy's close attentions but hadn't been outright rude. They sat at a booth in the back near the pinball machines. She was filled with nostalgia. She had once cried at this booth because a boy told her she looked like a drowned rat. Kohaku has soothed her and told her she was the prettiest girl in the world. She smiled. It seemed so silly and wistful now.

It was hard coming back to what she had formerly felt was as close as she was going to get to luxury. Back in her homeless days this place had seemed like paradise simply because it was warm and dry. Now when she looked around she saw the many cracks in the drywall and the yellowed linoleum. She tried to tell herself that her roots were still with her, but guilt still bit at her. While she would never be able to live her happy, wildly rich, and insanely pampered life with the Sesshoumaru with anything but the most grateful surprise, she knew she'd also never be able to appreciate her moldy bench or scrounged meals again.

It was going to be hard to admit that her homelessness had occurred. She barely believed it; it all seemed unreal now. It was going to be extremely hard to admit it to Sesshoumaru. But it had to be done. If she kept living in blissful denial it would truly fade and become unreal to her. She didn't want to forget those years of hardship. She had worked too hard, suffered too much, and been too sad to forget now. What she was now was a sum of all her previous actions.

Kikyo

The miasma burned the inside of her nose and throat. Naraku had grown far too strong. When had he had the time to amass that sort of energy? She had monitored him so closely… How had she let him overpower her? Now she was rendered utterly powerless, suspended in a great green orb… one that was so similar to all the countless others she'd put other helpless souls into. Now she suffered the same fate: to be simple fodder to the Jewel's ravenous appetite for souls. Only compared to the rest of the pitifully weak souls, her soul would send the Jewel into hyper drive.

"Ah, my dear, dear Kikyo. How does it feel to be killed by your own pet project?" Naraku's voice said through the distortion of the membrane. "This is what you get for failing me. You let them become Mates. Now Shikon can never work as we'd planned, even with a fully functioning jewel we couldn't overcome that connection. But don't you worry your pretty little head over it. My people and I have been working on some… new ideas. You just sit there making a nice little Kikyo Stew. I will make sure your little boyfriend suffers." He cackled cruelly.

She could barely make out Naraku's face looking in to her... It was greatly distorted by the thick, glutinous liquid and the warped green membrane, but she was sure she could make out a smile stretched across his sallow face. Kikyo had no idea what he planned to do. She certainly couldn't think of anything strong enough to break it… death, maybe… She scowled as deeply as she could but she was sapped of any and all of her powers inside the terrible stinging goo. The best hope she dared form was that either he'd surrender her soul to the Jewel quickly, or, in perhaps more vain a hope, that maybe Inuyasha would come after her.

But it was unlikely that Naraku would save her the suffering and let Shikon cleanly rip her soul from her. No, he would probably let it slowly absorb her powerful soul through the green goo. Hers, a soul full of holy powers granted from her being a priestess, wouldn't submit within a few hours like the rest of the fools they'd sapped. Hers would hold for weeks, slowly draining from her. The pain of separation was already eating at her. But her other hope, that Inuyasha would rescue her, was exponentially less likely. Wracking sobs formed in her chest but she was unable to give in to them, the green slime kept her immobile.

There had been a time when she loved him. And just now, with her world collapsing, she realized she'd never stopped loving him. She'd die hoping only to be with him. Bitterness flooded her heart; there had been a time when he, too, had loved her. But now he followed that Kagome like a lovesick puppy. And she, his first love, would die alone.

Sesshoumaru

Sesshoumaru looked at Rin sideways. He could tell something was up. She was jittery and he could smell it. Actually, he could almost feel it thanks to their new bond. It couldn't be so bad, whatever it was. Surely it was just some sort of thing that happened in her past. Perhaps her family. After all, he knew very little of her family. Come to think of it, he knew nothing of her family, which was unfair considering that she had lived with his family. Kohaku returned with the drinks and took their orders.

He ran his finger across the rim of his mug as he watched her suck her orange juice through a straw. She would break soon, he could feel it. All that he needed to do was stare at her a moment and…

"Sesshoumaru?" She asked.

"Yes?" He replied patiently.

"I have something to tell you." She said lowly.

"You can tell me." She was infuriatingly nervous.

He was unconcerned. Yes, she was quite nervous, but he couldn't think of anything she could say that he couldn't take in stride. He was mated to her, after all. What could it possibly be? Sure, her family could be all sorts of lunatics. But that didn't matter. Bad family didn't mean bad person. Inuyasha was related to him and that didn't make him a lazy idiot. He couldn't think of anything else worthy of this anxiety.

He could practically play out her pleasant little life in his mind. She had probably grown up somewhere in the countryside which explained her ignorance of city life. She probably went to some high profile business to escape her hometown and had ended up in Tokyo pursuing greater things. And she had obviously had few enough men in her life because he had been the first to touch her in any intimate way.

Actually the whole thing was playing out quite pleasantly in his mind's eye, like some sort of Lassie movie. But he wouldn't injure her pride by suggesting that her woes didn't merit nervousness. Instead he would listen carefully and offer his mate support. Besides, he was anxious to know her story anyway, even just for the knowing itself.

It had taken her all this while to prepare to truly launch into the telling. This was clearly painful for her. He reached across the table and took her hand. This caused her to relax a bit and finally get going.

"Okay." She sighed gratefully. "Well… it is just that I may have… omitted a few facts about my… ah, origins. You see, Sesshoumaru… and I am not sure if you are going to believe this or not, but I was… um, homeless… that is to say that I… lived on the streets." She said in fast and stuttering intervals.

He said silent, trying to figure out just what she had said. Homeless? How is that even possible? This all must be some great prank of hers… He inhaled deeply. He smelled her intense relief but no trace of any lies or jests. He couldn't see anything but honesty in her features either. Still, he must simply have misunderstood.

"What did you say, Rin?" He asked without quite as much stability in his voice as he might have hoped.

"I… ah…" Tears framed her words. "When… when I was a sophomore in high school my family's shop burned down… my mother died in the fire and my father died a few months later of alcohol poisoning, he drank himself to death. I didn't have any other family so I was left to the streets. We'd always been poor; there was nothing left for me. I have lived there on the streets for the past four years… till I met you." She whispered. Unfortunately his demon ears missed nothing.

"Stop this prank." He growled.

"It's no prank… I lived in the Public Park with the rest of the homeless." She whispered.

"So you're saying that you lived on the streets for years and then just suddenly decided to show up at my office?" He barked angrily, still partially convinced she was just elaborately yanking his chain.

"I know it doesn't make sense… but I loved you." She admitted weakly as tears ran down her face.

"You lied to me. I believed you to be an accredited secretary."

"I know… I'm so, so, so sorry. It's no excuse, but I didn't really lie. I just didn't mention the truth." She offered pathetically. "If you had asked… I don't think I could have lied."

"You expect me to believe this?" He asked. It was all… absolutely ridiculous. "I do not appreciate practical jokes, Rin." He seethed.

"It's no joke, Sesshoumaru. How can I prove it to you?"

She didn't need to prove it to him. It was difficult to lie to a Dog Demon. And beyond that he somehow knew she wasn't lying. He couldn't explain it, but he felt that she wasn't lying. He knew it as well as he would if he had swept her off the streets himself. It was as if she were uncovering half-known facts in his brain. She had been homeless. He had foolishly given her a job she was nowhere near qualified for. He had been duped.

He stood up quickly. Rage was filling him. He knew his eyes were already clouding with red. But more than being angry he was… hurt. Admitting it to himself just stoked the fires of his anger. He felt her betrayal sorely. She had gone from nervous to terrified.

When his father had left his mother all alone to waste away for a woman he impregnated he had sworn never to let anyone hurt him again. He had barred his heart. He used his impassiveness to guard against further disappointment. And here he had opened himself for the first time ever and had immediately been betrayed again.

And this time he had been many times over again the fool he had been earlier. This time he bound himself only to her, his ruination. She had crippled him. No matter how much he hated her, his soul would ache for her. He felt his lip curl in a scowl. She sat silent with that damned endearing pleading look in her eyes. She thought that he was in the palm of her hand now that they were mates. Well she had another thing coming. He had lived emptily before and he could do it again.

"You foul temptress. You have sought to ruin me and have succeeded. Unfortunately for you just because I am ruined does not mean I shall let you reap the rewards." Sesshoumaru growled with his teeth bared.

Before his words even soaked through to her he got up from the booth and set off to the door. He walked quickly out to the Porsche and left her there. He heard her screaming his name as he left but he did not allow it to register in his brain. He hit the accelerator and squealed out of the parking lot.

Inuyasha

Breakfast was a pleasant affair. They chose a little 50's style diner to eat at. He had eggs, sausage, bacon, hash browns, and a side of ham. Kagome had a more reserved plate of French toast. They had talked little. For some reason Kagome was more silent than normal.

He would be concerned, but for some reason this seemed like the good kind of silence. It seemed like the sort of quiet that obsessing over that not being able to stop thinking about the person you're trying not to talk to caused. He grinned widely.

"So, are you planning to visit your family's shrine over Christmas?" He asked hopefully.

"Nah. I'm just going to stay in the city. Besides, there's still a lot of work to be done with Project Shikon." Kagome sighed.

"Kagome, you know that Miroku, Sango, and I can keep it together for a while." Inuyasha admonished.

"It's really okay. I mean, if I went back home my grandfather would probably just make me wear Feudal Era garb and peddle cheap charms that he swears work. The holidays are the busiest time of the year at the shrine. If I went back home I'd end up working just as much as I would if I stayed here. At least here the work I will be doing might be productive." Kagome said cheerfully.

"Oh. Are you sure? I mean, the city is great but nothing beats family." Inuyasha suggested.

"Absolutely. The Shrine is boring. And it makes me feel guilty selling all those worthless chunks of plastic my grandfather claims are charms." Kagome rebuked him gently.

"Oh." Inuyasha sighed.

Truthfully, he had been seriously hoping that she'd go back to her shrine for the next week or two, safe in the countryside. He would have rested easier knowing she was out of the way of whatever evil Naraku was up to. As much as he'd like her help, he'd rather have her safely in her family's shrine.

But this did open up an entirely differently, if no less interesting, conversation tree. If he couldn't have her safe then he might as well have her with him. That way he'd have a slightly better chance of keeping her safe. And beyond that, he simply wanted her with him.

"Why 'oh'?" Kagome asked quizzically.

"So you'll have no plans on the 23rd, then?" Inuyasha asked.

"No, I'm free."

"Ah. Well, have you heard of West Oni's Christmas Banquet?" He probed.

"Of course. The Takashi's throw a celebration every winter at the traditional hall your family owns." Kagome answered professionally.

"Good. I was hoping you'd like to go to it with me. As my date." Inuyasha stuttered.

"Oh… Oh!" Kagome exclaimed. "Yeah! I mean, of course."

"Wonderful." He replied wryly.

Sango

Miroku was, of course, taking up vast majority of Sango's twin mattress. It was a true mark of love if you felt compelled to sacrifice your own sleeping comfort just so you wouldn't bother your lover as he cuddled in all of your comforter and pillows. She smiled wanly as she gazed upon the sleeping man. He did look alarmingly innocent in his sleep. You'd never guess he was a pervert.

Sango's smile suddenly turned into a grimace as she felt Miroku squirm slightly moving the last inch of blankets off her toes. That was just intolerable. She could tough out cold arms and torso, but toes? Toes went subarctic in seconds without a blanket! She thought about throttling the sleeping man awake. His angelic expression halted her once again. She wondered if it was some sort of evolutionary survival mechanism. He was only so cute so you wouldn't throttle him…

"SISTER!" Kohaku's voice bellowed up the stairway. His footfalls pounded up the hallway.

Sango blanched. Partially because Kohaku was clearly in distress. But mostly because she didn't want him to know Miroku had spent the night. Not that he would care, but still. Sango used all her might to kick Miroku off the bed and onto the floor between her bed and the wall opposite the door.

"What the?!" He exclaimed.

"Shut up! Hide!" She hissed as she pushed his head down. Luckily he obeyed just in time so that when Kohaku swung her door open Miroku was obscured from view.

"Kohaku! What is it?" She gasped.

"Sango! You have to come downstairs to the restaurant! It's Rin! I don't know what happened but I think she's sick!" Kohaku panted in panicked bursts.

"Alright alright!" She replied before giving Miroku a solid warning kick not to show himself and launched out of bed.

She pounded down the narrow stairs at an alarming rate. She was expecting some horrifying scene involving blood, guts, and maybe machine guns. But instead all she saw was Rin sobbing softly with her head down on the table. It was still fairly alarming, but it was still a bit of a letdown for her adrenaline rush.

"Rin! What's the matter?" She panted as she stepped forward to touch the girl.

"Leave me alone!" Rin wailed.

Sango was utterly mystified. Rin was really more of a happy-go-lucky type, not the sobbing sniveling sort. So whatever it was that was bothering her could not be good. Sango plopped into the chair across from Rin. Sango was insanely uncomfortable. This sort of thing wasn't her forte. She was the "quiet suffering and hiding your feelings" sort. Wracking sobs was a Kagome thing. Not that Kagome sobbed a whole lot, but she certainly did it more than Sango who sobbed pretty much never.

"Rin, please tell me what's the matter." Sango said calmly.

"Leave me alone." Rin moaned.

"Well, ah, okay then." Sango replied anxiously.

Nope, she obviously hadn't missed her calling as a psychiatrist or something. Sango stood back up and walked back to the kitchen where Kohaku had retreated. He looked almost as bad off as Rin. He was absently wringing a towel out.

"Kohaku, do you have any idea what happened?" She asked.

"No… not really. She came in just about 15 minutes ago with Mr. Takashi." Kohaku responded blankly.

"Mr. Takashi? You mean Inuyasha? Or Inutaisho? It was Sesshoumaru, I'm sure." Sango mused.

"Yeah, it was Sesshoumaru."

"Of course it would be. But for some reason I would have preferred if it wasn't… This can't be good if it was Sesshoumaru. What were they doing? Did she seem upset then?" Sango probed.

"Um, well, I guess they were eating breakfast, duh. She seemed fine. Actually they both seemed fairly radiantly happy." He explained.

"Huh. But then what happened? Tell me what you know. Be thorough." Sango prodded. Her brother was being thicker than usual.

"I was back in the kitchens placing the orders when I hear Mr. Takashi talking louder and louder. He seemed really mad. But I didn't hear anything suspicious. Then he took off and Rin screamed after him. After that she just sort of… shut down." He explained.

"Oh crap. I guess I better call Kagome." Sango groaned.

Sesshoumaru

Played for a fool. Just like every other stupid person in the world. He was pissed. But more than that, he was hurt. Hurt in a way he'd never been before. Yeah, he'd experienced some pain when his father left his mother and when she'd died, but that was nothing to this. He had loved Rin. Truly and fully. And she hadn't loved him back. She'd lied to him. The whole thing from day one had been a lie.

Beyond that he was doubly pained because he was away from his mate and not planning to go back. It was a weird, primordial feeling of mental and emotional death. He'd never rid himself of this feeling. They were mated. He'd never be able to be happy without her. Even so, he refused to forgive her. He was strong. He'd live with this handicap because he knew the only other option was to saddle him with an even bigger handicap: Rin. He'd not allow her to gain from his loss. She'd have to return to the streets and find her next target. His lips curled in a feral snarl. He felt wounded physically, emotionally, and mentally. She'd managed to take a large part of him without him even realizing it.

The city streets had gone by in a blur. He had made several loops around downtown before he decided that he needed to make up his mind about his destination. He didn't want to go to the penthouse. Firstly he didn't want to run into Rin. Secondly he knew that being there just remind him exquisitely of the pain she'd caused him. And his parents' house was not a viable option either. They'd just know something was wrong.

The only real option was the office. Wasn't it closer to his home than any other place? Of course it was. Ever since he was 15 and become a page at West Oni he'd been forever working there. His place was behind a desk distributing orders. His career was his everything. Especially now.

He slid into the parking lot, breaks squealing in protest. He shut off the engine, fully aware that he had taken up half of the adjacent space as well as his own. As he angry-walked to the front of the building he was suddenly distracted. A flash caught his eye across the street. He whipped around to look across the street. To his dismay there was nothing there. He stood for a minute staring blankly at that spot across the street. After a few minutes he shook his head and proceeded into the building. Now he was losing it.

Sesshoumaru was glad it was Sunday. Ninety percent of the employees were off. Only a few security officers and a small contingent of people who needed extra time working for something or another. He wasn't hassled once during his trip to the elevator.

Instead of waiting for the elevator Sesshoumaru decided to take the stairs. A little physical exertion sounded like a good idea. But the 75 flights of stairs did little to tire him. He was at the lobby even faster than he would have been if he would have taken the elevator. Yura was sitting at the desk which surprised him a little since she wasn't really the hardest working person in the world. Thankfully Jakken was not. Not because Jakken didn't want to be there, but someone had mercifully sent him on an errand probably.

He flopped into his leather desk chair and clicked his computer monitor's power on. He was still just as mad as he was before. Possibly more. He was glad that the time he took off to be with Rin—he bristled at the thought of her—had left a massive stack of paperwork, files, and reports. They wouldn't fully distract him, but they would dull the pain of it.

Inuyasha

After spending a solid two hours at the diner Inuyasha finally paid the tab and they made their way back to his car. Kagome had blossomed beautifully at the thought of attending the Banquet. And now that his insecurities and his anxiety at her response he, too, was able to let himself relax a little.

The car ride back to Kagome's apartment was filled with pleasant chatter. Inuyasha enjoyed the way she smiled at him even when he wasn't saying anything. He was enamored with her. Possibly in love. She was beautiful, smart, and talented. But more than that, she liked him as he was. Kikyo had been constantly attempting to adjust and "fix" him. Kagome appreciated him as he was.

He pulled into the fire lane in front of her apartment. Kagome flushed in embarrassment. He smirked at her. She was about to scold him when her phone went off. She started rifling through her purse. Finally she withdrew her cell phone.

"Sorry." She apologized.

"No prob." He replied.

She answered the phone and Inuyasha immediately noticed her eyes widen. He listened closely and heard Sango's voice. He couldn't make out the words but he heard panic in her voice.

"What? Why?" Kagome asked with shock in her voice. "Yes, yes, don't worry, I'll be over immediately." She hung up.

"What was that all about?" He asked her. Please don't let it be Shikon, it's Sunday, he thought.

"It's Rin. Apparently there's been some trouble between… her and your brother. She's apparently very upset. They are all over at Sango's brother's restaurant. Will you take me there Inuyasha or should I hail a cab?" Kagome asked seriously.

"Of course I'll take you there. Like I'd miss something like that." He chided.

Had Rin tried to tell Sesshoumaru about the whole Naraku debacle? He hoped not. Or had whatever was going on between them be a symptom of the debacle? Well, the fastest way to find out was to get onto the scene..

Rin

Only in her most horrifying dreams did she even imagine that he'd leave her upon finding out about her past. She had anticipated that he might be a little angry or upset, but she did not think that it would end their relationship. She had actually harbored a fantasy that he'd love her all the more for it. She had fantasized that he'd find her brave for her efforts to get close to him. But her most disappointing theory had been that after telling him this he'd awaken just like Inuyasha, Miroku, and Sango had.

She loved him. He loved her. Why wasn't that enough? She had her head down between her folded arms. She was still too shocked to move and too hurt to face Sango and Kohaku. It was as if a part of her had died, only worse. This part had left of its own accord. What reason was there to go on living? Suicide was out of the question but she knew that without Sesshoumaru life would be a grim experience devoid of any hope.

She didn't know if she regretted telling him or not. If she had to guess, both of her options would have caused this reaction. Or at the very best not telling him would have eaten her away on the insides slowly and painfully. Naraku had managed to trap her in a way so devious, so evil that her only option had been to lie to him. Useless remorse bogged her down. Had there been another option? Could she have broken this spell without getting the job at West Oni? She certainly couldn't think of a way that didn't involve somehow getting into West Oni. Sure, now she had allies in the awakened Inuyasha, Miroku, and Sango but would they even have woken up without her? Maybe, but would that have been enough? Regardless, it was too late now. She'd walked this path already.

She could hear Kohaku quietly washing dishes. She figured he was probably shaking because he was dropping a plate about ever three minutes. Sango too was nearby. She stood on Rin's side leaning up against the menu board. Rin felt a little bad that she didn't have it in her to relieve their worry. It was rude of her to refuse to acknowledge them and their attempts at consoling her. Unfortunately Rin thought she'd sooner vaporize than face any thing or any one at this moment.

The doorbell jingled. Someone had come in. Rin didn't look up because she assumed it would be just another patron. Great, now she'd be publicly humiliated.

"Sango, what's the matter?" Kagome's anxious voice asked.

"Yeah, did you find out what freaked her out yet?" Inuyasha prodded.

Rin sighed lightly. She now had a small fleet at her services. It was a kindness that she hadn't known before and it was something she ought to be incredibly grateful for. But she couldn't summon the grace.

"No. She hasn't spoken a word. But Kohaku says she was here with Sesshoumaru and then suddenly he was shouting and he left her like…this. All shut down." Sango explained anxiously.

A long silence stretched out. They were patiently waiting for her to open up. She formed a ghost of a wish to do so but it wasn't enough. Eventually she heard Inuyasha's sneakers approach her. He laid a clawed hand gently on her shoulder.

"Rin, did you tell him?" Inuyasha asked quietly.

Rin's throat ceased to seize for a moment. To her surprise, she was able to lift her head a few inches off the table. The blind flurry of hope that Inuyasha could help had given her the strength to tenuously re-enter the world of the living.

"Only about… my hometown. Not about my previous… career." Rin submitted painfully, hoping the metaphors would keep Kagome from becoming overly suspicious.

"And he just up and left?" Inuyasha asked curiously.

"Yes. He believes I am a liar. He wants nothing to do with me." She groaned. Inuyasha shifted his weight at this frustrating revelation.

"What an idiot. He's the one that's going to suffer. For being the 'smart one' he sure is an idiot." Inuyasha growled.

"What do you mean, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked from behind him.

"I mean that since they are mated and he's the Dog Demon, he's going to be the one who can't move on." Inuyasha explained.

"No, I got that, I mean the other part. Why he left Rin." Kagome added.

"Oh, that's nothing. Just a matter of Rin's previous… jobs." Inuyasha recovered.

"Why would he be upset about that?" Kagome continued.

"It was a… rival company." Inuyasha lied.

"Oh…" Kagome sighed. She was clearly not fooled. But she let go for the sake of the moment.

"Great, great. Now we just need to figure out how to get them back together. I have absolutely no ideas." Sango interrupted. "Rin's reasonable enough but the Ice King isn't really one to be negotiated with."

"I'll take care of it." Rin heard Inuyasha say in a steady, powerful tone she had heard frequently from Sesshoumaru and even from Inutaisho from time to time. It was the Great Dog Demon General Voice, as Izayoi had dubbed it.

Inuyasha

Inuyasha anxiously practiced what he was going to say the whole car trip. This wasn't going to be enjoyable or easy. Since when did he become the emotions police? There should be others to try to talk since his frozen brother. He shouldn't be forced to do favors for that lout. Unfortunately, this time the only one he knew he could trust with this important mission was himself. Out of the few people who remembered the past he was the only one who knew his brother. Rin might know Sesshoumaru fairly well, but there were many things it took years and years to understand about Sesshoumaru. Only Inuyasha had the "blessing" of that sort of time observing Lord Freezer Burn.

He knew the past, he knew his brother, and he knew Rin. It was annoying that that Sesshoumaru had condescended, isolated, and teased him for their entire childhood and a goodly portion of their adulthood. But when it came down to it, Inuyasha couldn't sit back and watch his half-brother ruin both his own and Rin's life. For one, Rin was a good person and didn't deserve that. But more frustratingly, he had his blood ties with his brother. He consoled himself with the notion that it was for his own benefit. Sesshoumaru was epically easier to deal with when Rin was around melt him. Still, if someone had told him that he was going to gladly do his brother a giant favor, say, as few as nine weeks ago he'd have told them to get back on their meds.

He had hated his brother frequently but Sesshoumaru was still his brother. And as cruel and horrid as Sesshoumaru occasionally was, looking back Inuyasha could remember a number of times when his brother saved his ass. Sesshoumaru was a dick. But Sesshoumaru was Inuyasha's brother. Inuyasha didn't want to watch as Sesshoumaru shut himself down and collapsed slowly. And he didn't want that for Rin either.

This time Inuyasha would save the day. Even if it was his dick of an older half-brother that he was saving.

He knew where his brother would be. It wasn't a hard mystery to solve. Sesshoumaru wouldn't go back to his penthouse; it would just remind him of Rin. And pride would prevent him from returning to their father's house. He would be at the office, distracting himself with paperwork that the secretaries could easily do for him. Inuyasha skidded into the parking lot leaving two black streaks of rubber behind him. He'd been right; Sesshoumaru's Porsche was parked crookedly in his spot and another.

A swift jog got him into the building in a matter of minutes. The place was still mildly busy for all that it was a Sunday. He guessed that they were all finishing up last minute Christmas projects. Inuyasha jogged over to the elevator and punched the button a million times. Where was the fun in only hitting it once? Eventually the elevator worked its way down and Inuyasha was on his way up to the 75th floor. It, too, was deserted.

Inuyasha flew through the lobby and burst through Sesshoumaru's office door and through his secretary's office only to find the inner door to be locked. Sesshoumaru had barricaded himself into his own office. Inuyasha growled and let out a sharp knock on the door.

"Let me in." Inuyasha demanded.

Still no response. Inuyasha growled again and, in one swift motion, turned the knob so hard that the lock snapped. He then kicked the door open to find that Sesshoumaru was, indeed, in his office. Sesshoumaru did look terrible, there was no denying that. His eyes were a cloudy red and Inuyasha could sense waves of Demonic energy snapping across the room. He dusted himself off as if he could wipe the circulating power from him.

"It was locked for a reason." Sesshoumaru growled in a deep voice. Inuyasha frowned. Sesshoumaru was practically half way to transformation in his rage.

"Do I appear to care?" Inuyasha asked sarcastically, knowing that he had to approach this in the only way he knew how to interact with his brother, irritate, aggravate, humiliate... He sat down casually in the chair opposite Sesshoumaru and leaned back.

"Get out." Sesshoumaru commanded.

"Absolutely not. I'm here to talk to you about Rin. Deal with it." Inuyasha said proudly.

"I suppose that I my only other option would be to kill you." Sesshoumaru seethed.

"Correct." Inuyasha replied in condescending cheer. "You know you shouldn't have done that to Rin, abandoning her like that. What if she got hurt or raped or something? That isn't a very nice place in town."

Sesshoumaru did not reply and went back to the report in his hand. But Inuyasha knew he had his brother's attention because the bands of demonic energy began to crackle even more furiously.

"I don't see why you think it's such a big deal. I don't think she's done anything wrong." Inuyasha stated as he dropped into one of the chairs opposite Sesshoumaru.

"How could it not be a big deal? She lied about her credentials and used this company." Sesshoumaru rebuked.

"Feh. Seriously? Those aren't even good reasons. Firstly, she might have not had credentials, but can you honestly say that she disappointed you as an assistant? For all that she lacks a diploma, she is a fast learner. And she's very dedicated. Secondly, and most importantly, you love her. You forgive loved ones their sins. I've never seen you more than mildly interested in a woman other than carnally. That doesn't come along every day. Not to mention that you are mates." Inuyasha argued.

Sesshoumaru looked up at him with boiling hate bubbling in his eyes. Fear edged its way into the back of Inuyasha's mind. Sesshoumaru was closer to changing and subsequently ripping his throat out than he'd ever witnessed before. Great courage kept him in his seat staring defiantly back. Suddenly he felt Sesshoumaru's aura lock down in some effort of hide and control.

"You know she loves you. Though I will never know why. Think of the risks she took just to get to you. It shouldn't matter what she was or where she came from. All that matter is if you love her enough to forgive her. And you know that you do." Inuyasha said in a hushed voice barely above a whisper.

"I will not forgive her." Sesshoumaru muttered. Inuyasha sighed as he felt the bands of power thinning promisingly.

"Okay, you won't forgive. But as long as it's not 'can't' then we still have some hope." Inuyasha mused as he stood up slowly and stretched. "Think about it. It doesn't even make sense for you guys to be apart at this point. You're mates. If you leave her you'll suffer far worse than she will. Even though you want to hate her, you can't. Why engender pointless suffering?" Inuyasha asked.

"It's not that simple." Sesshoumaru replied in a barely audible tone.

"Yeah, actually. It is." Inuyasha said simply before turning and leaving the Ice Prince to his thoughts. Brilliantly done, he thought. If that didn't work, nothing he could do would.

Rin

After hours of sobbing Kagome and Sango had finally managed to peel her of the table and had now relocated her to Kohaku's bed. It was night and the moonlight shone across the room. They made her tea and tried to get her to take an anti-anxiety pill. She refused, she deserved her suffering. She cuddled into Kohaku's comforter and cried. She cried for her lost life. She cried for Sesshoumaru. She cried for her lost past.

She had been silently crying for around two hours when there was a knock on the door. Kagome poked her head in. The bright-eyed woman gave Rin a smile. Rin felt a tiny involuntary twitch in the corners of her mouth. Kagome's happiness could be intoxicating.

"How are you feeling, Rin?" Kagome asked.

"As well as can be expected, I suppose." Rin replied through a hoarse voice.

"Good because there is a visitor here for you." Kagome replied.

"A visitor?" Rin asked hazily.

"Yeah, one I think you'd like to see very much." Kagome said before leaving the room.

A new shadow fell across the door way almost immediately. Rin squinted into the brighter light. Her heard exploded when she saw it was Sesshoumaru. She was both incredibly excited and terribly afraid. He was either here to fix her heart, or destroy it. Again.

He was even more impassive than usual. He might have been carved of stone. Her heart fluttered with anxiety and her stomach turned violently in fear. She couldn't tell if he was mad or not. The darkness, his impassiveness, and her teary eyes had teamed up to make it utterly impossible for her to have even the vaguest idea what was going through his head.

He walked slowly to the edge of the bed. The moonlight illuminated his face enough for her to see. To her surprise he did not look furious. His eyes were dark and his mouth was a thin line. Tears came fast to her eyes. She swallowed hard and tried to find the words she needed.

Before she could begin to sputter out apologies or pleading Sesshoumaru stepped forward and placed his fingers to her lips, silencing her. She gulped. He didn't remove his fingers but sat down on the edge of the bed. Her heart was racing.

Then he turned to look her straight in the eyes. In that one look he communicated more to her than he had ever said before. In that one look she felt all of his love, his hurt, his anger, but mostly she felt his infinite forgiveness and his own apology. She smiled weakly as a flood of so many emotions overtook her. He wiped a stray tear from her cheek. Rubbing it in between his fingers he sighed.

"Sesshoumaru I am so-" She launched.

"Hush." He cut her off quickly.

Her mouth snapped shut. He gave her a miniscule smirk and ran his hand through her hair. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her mouth. It was a kiss of absolution. Even more tears ran down her face than had before. These tears were of relief. He forgave her. He knew what she was and loved her anyway.

"Are you ready to go home?" He whispered into her ear. Home...

"Please." She replied.

Inuyasha

After finally seeing Rin and Sesshoumaru off hand in hand, there was a great mutual sigh between Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango, Kagome, and Kohaku. Actully, hee would have believed that the shabby building itself had participated in the group sigh. The whole assembled group stood there for a while, paralyzed with relief. Eventually, though, Kohaku left to reclaim his room and Sango and Miroku had disappeared to parts unknown to bask in the relief-engendered romantic atmosphere a little more privately. Inuyasha remained leaning against the kitchen's door post overlooking Kagome who was still hypnotized with the spot Sesshoumaru and Rin had just left. He was filled with a sort of pride and fraternal feeling he had not experienced before. Love? Nah. He smirked slowly as he realized it would be some time before Sesshoumaru could venture to tease him again. It had been worth it. If even for the ability to call upon this memory in the future for buying favors or just avoiding condescension.

Just then Kagome pivoted in her spot and looked at him with a grin so wide and eyes so bright with happy tears that he was struck immobile. With a bounce in her step, Kagome walked over to him and looked up at him with those merry brown eyes he liked so much.

"Inuyasha, what you did today... I just want you to know that it was really, really... great of you." Kagome said softly.

Various responses, sarcastic or otherwise, darted through his head but ultimately could not be vocalized by the shocked half-demon. Kagome just smiled even wider and then, standing on her tip toes, wrapped her arms around him and kissed him deeply. Oh yeah, it had definitely been worth it.

Next Chapter: Traditions- The Banquet is around the corner as Rin, Sango, and Kagome go dress shopping and Inuyasha tries everything to get Kagome to remember the past. And Rin does some Xmas shopping for Sesshoumaru who has his own Xmas planning to do. Fluff, fluff, and more fluff in the last chapter that I can really dedicate to fluff before everything ignites.

Oh, and you're welcome for not making this a cliffhanger. Because you KNOW I totally could have if I wanted to. You're lucky I'm as impatient as anyone else.