The Iron Sole Alchemist Goes to Hogwarts (Chapter 48) Secret Conspiracies
by Howlin
(Disclaimer: I don't own any rights to any of the universes, places, or characters, and only claim the protagonist, Sloth, and Loki as my own creation. This is fan fiction, and I don't profit from it. Please don't sue me.)
Once we adapted to the increased workload of our OWL year, the rest of the first week passed relatively uneventfully. I'd been able to verify that Harry's detentions had been the same as mine. I mended the back of his hand with a red stone. There was no sense in letting her leave a permanent scar. Ron had tried out for, and got, a position on the Gryffindor Quidditch team. The keeper position vacated by the former captain, Olliver Wood who'd graduated year before last.
Ron seemed genuinely surprised when I talked to him about scheduling his alchemy lessons around his new Quidditch duties. He seemed to have gotten the idea we were done now that he'd performed a human transmutation, seen the Gate, and could now clap transmute. I explained that there was still another year of material to cover.
Daily fencing lessons were out this year. With all the extra work assigned, we'd have to drop down to weekends only. I wasn't happy about giving even that much, and if I still had my time turner, I would've insisted we use it. As I didn't, I was forced to concede there were only so many hours in a day.
My dream journal for Trelawney was filled with being watched by Moody's magic eye and Umbridge giving actually useful lessons on horcruxes. In Divination, I was surprised to see Umbridge observing Trelawney's lesson. Harry quickly hissed a parseltongue explanation. Umbridge had been appointed "Hogwarts High Inquisitor" by Fudge. It was a new position that let her observe other teachers and sack any who weren't performing to standard.
Umbridge's presence was an unwelcome irritant, bringing everyone out of the semi-trance state Trelawney cultivated in order to help everyone perform at their best in her class. Even she was shaken by Umbridge following behind her as she went through her lessons. When Umbridge demanded Trelawney predict something, she waffled before declaring the defense professor was in great danger. Given what had happened to her predecessors, it was a good bet even without second sight.
That evening, Ron and I went down to the alchemy lab. Once there, I triple checked our security. While I did, Ron complained about a letter he'd received the previous night. Apparently, Percy was trying to convince Ron to disassociate himself from me and Harry. That really stung with how much I'd liked Percy and valued his advice while we were in school together.
"Okay, Ron," I said when I was sure nothing could observe us, "we still have some applications for red stones to go over and there are additional details about homunculi and the Gate I want to cover this year, but first, I think it's time you learn about the Philosopher's Stone."
"You explained about it in first year," said Ron. "It lets you do alchemy without a circle and lets you make homunculi without seeing the Gate and losing a limb."
"Those are just a couple of uses the Stone can be put to. It can also be used to fully raise someone from the dead as a normal human being, even if you don't have their soul. It has been theorized to be capable of turning soulless homunculi human. But what I want to talk about today is how it's made.
"Human transmutation is the ultimate taboo in alchemy, but the Philosopher's Stone is a step beyond that for those who know the secret. Most alchemists who learn either quit their research or go insane. Entire civilizations have turned their backs on alchemy on mass after learning how this works. You may decide you want to take Percy's advice about me once you know what I've done."
"Do you have to be so dramatic about every single thing?" asked Ron, rolling his eyes. "I've stuck with you this long, and I didn't back out after getting my arm ripped off. Just get on with it already."
"Alright," I said, drawing an array on the blackboard. "Red stones are a weaker refinement of the concept of an alchemy amplifier. They're a million times weaker than a true Stone. They were developed because the price for creating a stone is measured in human lives. Not tens, not hundreds, not thousands, but tens of thousands of people need ot die, their life energy captured and wrung out of their bodies by this array, which is drawn around a city."
Ron's jaw dropped. "You-?"
"I made one," I confirmed. "The city I transmuted was going to be destroyed a few seconds later by an atomic bomb, a muggle weapon, and I decided it would be wasteful for those people to die and not get anything in return. That was the Philosopher's Stone I carried with me into this world, that is the Stone Tom tried to steal in our first year, that is the Stone that was drained of its power in the graveyard last year when Petigrew made me throw it up."
"You could've killed everyone at the World Cup," said Ron, awed and more than a little frightened.
"Yes I could," I said. "Tom would if he knew how."
"He would," agreed Ron. "I'm sorry."
"About what?" I asked.
"Well, if anything deserves getting dramatic about, it's this."
The next day, Umbridge spent most of her inspection of Professor Grubly-Plank asking pointed questions about Hagrid. Once classes were done for the day, I met up with the others. Hermione handed me her graded Arithmancy homework, and I set to work checking my answers. As I worked, a conversation sprung up in parseltongue.
"I reckon you two should complain to McGonagall and Flitwick about Umbridge and her detentions," said Ron. "They'd flip out if they knew about what was happening."
"Yeah, they probably would," said Harry. "And how long do you reckon it'd take Umbridge to pass another decree saying anyone who complains about the High Inquisitor gets sacked immediately?"
"She's an awful woman," said Hermione. "We've got to do something about her."
"Killing her would just draw down more scrutiny and trouble from the Ministry," I said. "We can't do that until we're ready to declare war on them."
"War on the Ministry?" asked Ginny. "Isn't that exactly what they're afraid of? Why they stuck us with her in the first place?"
"I'm not talking about killing her," said Hermione, exasperated, "but we do need to do something about what a dreadful teacher she is, and about how we're not going to learn any defense from her at all."
"She was a political appointment," said Sloth. "Getting her removed without killing her just isn't going to happen."
"Well," said Hermione, "you know, I was thinking today. I was thinking that maybe the time's come when we should just... just do it ourselves."
"Do what ourselves?" asked Harry.
"Well, learn Defense Against the Dark Arts ourselves," replied Hermione.
"This isn't like Arithmancy where we have a good textbook we can just follow along with for an independent study," I said, glancing up.
"And we're already doing so much extra work we're backed up on homework again," said Ron. "And it's only the second week!"
"But this is so much more important than homework!" said Hermione, to surprised stares all around.
"If Fudge makes it so we don't know how to protect ourselves out of paranoia now that Tom's back," said Neville, "this is going to be a short war. You can bet the Death Eaters' kids are getting private lessons."
"Or it isn't paranoia at all and Fudge is on Tom's side," suggested Luna.
We paused to consider that for a long moment before Hermione pressed on. "Anyway, I agree we've gone past the stage where we can just learn things out of books. We need a teacher, a proper one who can show us how to use the spells and correct us if we're going wrong."
"If you're talking about Lupin-" began Harry.
"No, no, I'm not talking about Lupin," said Hermione. "He's too busy with the Order and anyway, the most we could see him is during Hogsmeade weekends and that's not nearly often enough."
"Who then?" asked Harry.
"Isn't it obvious? I'm talking about you, Harry."
"About me what?"
"I'm talking about you teaching us Defense Against the Dark Arts."
It took some convincing before Harry was on board with the idea. It was clear all the Order members were otherwise occupied except Sirius, who couldn't risk leaving the Order's headquarters. When Harry suggested Hermione, she revealed he'd actually scored better than her in the class whenever they'd had a competent teacher. When he suggested me, I reminded him I couldn't actually do magic and that he'd had to rescue me from the graveyard last year. Ultimately, Harry was convinced, and we moved on to working out the details.
This wasn't going to be just our group. Hermione had suggested and I immediately agreed that anyone who wanted to learn should have the opportunity. The plan was for each of us to sound out as many people as we could, and arrange to meet in the Hog's Head Inn in Hogsmeade on the first Hogsmeade weekend. We'd explain the plan to them there and arrange the details of meeting once everyone was officially agreed.
I spent the next few weeks streamlining my schedule. I'd managed to balance my coursework, fitting homework into the hours between when I had to be in Ravenclaw tower and when I had to go to bed. Ron's Quidditch practices were irregular, but we managed to squeeze in an hour a week for his alchemy lessons. I'd stopped eating and bathing so I could dedicate the time to my Arithmancy and Muggle Studies work, and simply resumed cleaning myself with alchemy. As I predicted, after an initial flurry of docked house points and detentions, my bugs had managed to root out much of the bullying problem.
I'd managed to cultivate a reputation for being evenhanded through my prefect work, which gave me the opportunity to approach the Slytherin students Snape had identified as being on the outs with Draco and his gang of Death Eater wannabes. When they arrived at the Hog's Head, the seediest bar in Hogsmeade, their presence elicited the expected response.
"What are they doing here?" demanded Ron.
"I invited them," I said firmly. "We agreed this was for anyone who wanted to learn."
"Yeah, but they're Slytherins," said Ron. "Why would we want to make them better at cursing us?"
"It's okay, Ron," said Harry. "It's not like he invited Draco."
"You can't possibly believe a full quarter of the wizard population is irredeemably evil, Ron," said Sloth.
"Look, if we're not wanted-" began one of the Slytherins.
"You can stay," said Harry firmly.
There were additional questions and exclamations as other students drifted in. Harry had to repeatedly bring them in line. Impressively, he silenced Fred and George Weasley's objections with a look before a sound came out of their mouths.
Hermione opened the meeting and explained the plan, that we'd meet to learn proper defense from Harry once a week. The Quidditch players insisted on scheduling the meetings around their practices, but other than some token questions about what Harry really had to teach, which were quickly answered, there were no objections to the core plan. Enthusiasm for the plan picked up further when we explained that Umbridge was here to deliberately sabotage our defense training because Fudge was afraid Dumbledore wanted to use us as an army against the Ministry.
"Well, the other thing to decide is where we're going to meet," said Hermione.
"Salazar Slytherin's Chamber of Secrets," I supplied. "We've been using it for secret training since we found it, and it's got all the space and security we could ask for. Besides, I'll bet that's what Slytherin would've wanted it used for anyway."
"You mean you really do know where hte Chamber of Secrets is?" asked one of the Slytherins. "Between that and the parseltongue thing, how are you not in our house, Harry?"
"I told the hat I didn't want to," said Harry. "I wasn't sharing a dorm with Draco Malfoy."
"That git cost us Potter," muttered one of the Slytherins angrily. "Dumbledore's favorite, best seeker in the school, and the Boy Who lived, and he's not in Slytherin because we're stuck with Malfoy."
"We'll send a message round to everybody when we've got a time for the first meeting. I-I think everybody should write their name down, just so we know who was here," said Hermione, taking a quill and blank parchment from her bag. "But I also think that we all ought to agree not to shout about what we're doing. So, if you do sign, you're agreeing not to tell Umbridge, or anybody else, about what we're up to."
Again, there was some hesitation, notably none from the Slytherins, and ultimately everyone signed. Back at the castle, Harry coordinated with the other Quidditch players under the guise of working out practice times, and worked out a time for our meeting. Meanwhile, I prepared a set of keys that would speak the parseltongue open command for the Chamber of Secrets only when i the hands of the person I handed the key to. If they were stolen, they wouldn't do the thief any good.
On Monday, a notice board was up in the Ravenclaw common room. The Ministry had passed a new decree. All student groups were suspended pending Umbridge's approval. Being part of an unapproved group was punishable by expulsion. Umbridge obviously knew what we were up to.
I promised the Ravenclaws who'd attended that I'd talk to Harry and get back to them as soon as possible. It was agreed that we were going forward with this anyway. We spread the time, the keys, and the need to visit Moaning Myrtle's bathroom.
Everyone made it safely to the Chamber of Secrets for the first meeting. Once everyone was there, Hermione again started things off, getting everyone present to elect a leader. Harry was agreed to unanimously. Hopefully, the legitimacy would help keep backtalk during training to a minimum. After that, she insisted we come up with a name. Mercifully, this didn't turn into a repeat of the interminable house elf rights group naming debates, and we quickly settled on Dumbledore's Army as a snub at the Ministry. DA for short when we might risk being overheard.
Finally, the meat of the meeting began with Harry pairing us all off to practice disarming spells on one another. Once in the swing of things, Harry again proved to be an excellent teacher. There was visible improvement from just one session. At the end of the session, Harry used the Marauder's Map to guide us all safely back to our common rooms.
After a few sessions, Ron and Hermione had made some improvements to my keys, replacing them with inconspicuous looking gold galleon coins. Ron had reapplied the parseltongue array and encased it inside the coin where it wouldn't be visible. Meanwhile, Hermione had magically linked the coins so when the serial numbers on one coin changed, all the others would change to match and the coins would get warm to tell us when they changed. The plan was for Harry to set the serial number on his coin to the date of the next meeting.
Things were finally going smoothly again. I was keeping up with my classwork. Alchemy lessons with Ron were progressing such that he'd know everything I had to teach him by the OWLs. Our illegal defense society was improving in combat ability by leaps and bounds under Harry. And I still had plenty of free time to spend with Sloth. The only negative was that Sir Nicholas had stopped our fencing lessons in compliance with the new educational decree, and none of us were going to ask Umbridge to reinstate it.
Sirius had contacted Harry using the Gryffindor fire to pass along a warning about our secret defense group. We'd been overheard during our initial meeting in the Hog's Head by the wizard who was tailing Harry. Ron, and the rest of his siblings were forbidden from participating by Mrs. Weasley. They ignored it, of course. Harry's parents were more supportive, though they insisted he make sure he wasn't caught. Sirius also delivered a reminder that owls were being intercepted and that we shouldn't risk putting anything in writing.
Things continued smoothly until Gryffindor's first Quidditch match of the season against Slytherin. Draco had worked out Ron didn't fly particularly well when under pressure. To capitalize on this, he'd organized the Slytherins into singing a song mocking Ron and his goalkeeping abilities. It worked. Ron choked badly, missing a number of easy saves. Gryffindor managed to pull off a win only thanks to Harry catching the Snitch before they were too far behind.
Unfortunately, once the game was over, Draco managed to provoke Harry and the Weasley twins into attacking him. The result was Draco covered in easily healed scrapes and bruises and Harry and the twins banned from Quidditch by Umbridge using her new authority granted by Fudge to dish out, remove, and alter school punishments. The Quidditch ban was disappointing for them, but the real problem was the effect this had on the DA.
The Gryffindors were practically at the Slytherin's throats over what happened. I had to snap and raise a wall of flames between them at our next meeting to stop the shouting and threats of violence from both sides. I let the flames die down and the conversation died down to a more reasonable volume.
"I thought we were supposed to be on the same side," accused one of the Gryffindors.
"In studying defense, not Quidditch," retorted the Slytherin. "Do Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff have to throw their games to our leader's house too?"
"Of course not, but you didn't have to join Malfoy chanting against another DA member!"
"This is a secret society! When we're not down here, we can't let on we're allies!"
"Oh, so it was to keep your cover?"
"It was a Quidditch game! And besides, Weasley really was lousy."
"Shut up!" yelled Harry.
"You tell him, Harry!" said the Gryffindor.
"Both of you, shut up!" clarified Harry. Everyone fell silent to hear him out. "I want to be mad at Umbridge, and Fudge, and Malfoy! I want us all to be on the same side, not trying to kill each other. Out there, you do what you have to do, but in here, we're all on the same side.
"You lot went along with Malfoy's plan, and you helped him mess with Ron. I don't like that, but we've all got bigger problems. And as long as we remember we're on the same side when it really matters, against Tom, I can live with it."
"Look, mate, I know I played rubbish," said Ron. "They're not wrong saying the obvious."
"And we lost our tempers with Malfoy all on our own," said George.
"Mind you," said Fred, they're also right about needing to keep our cover that we don't like each other. And everyone'll be expecting us to be looking for payback."
"As long as we're still on the same side when it counts?" ventured the Slytherin who'd been speaking up before.
I never learned what Fred and George did in retaliation, but it didn't put the Slytherins off attending DA meetings. The tensions dropped bit by bit, and Harry managed to get his lesson plan back on track.
In the meantime, Hagrid had returned from treating with the giants. News about the war effort helped focus everyone. The giants had sided with Voldemort. Hagrid had been successfully treating with the chieftain, offering a brand of ever burning fire conjured by Dumbledore, an indestructible goblin made helmet, and a roll of dragon skin as gifts to prove our side's good intentions, but a change in leadership saw a pro Death Eater chieftain put in charge, and Hagrid had been forced to flee. He was hopeful that another regime change might come, but I suspected that hope was bravado for our sakes.
Umbridge inspected the first Care of Magical Creatures class we had with Hagrid. He was giving a lesson on thestrals. Throughout the class, she spoke to Hagrid as though he were too stupid to understand common English and asked leading questions that Draco and his cronies were all too happy to supply the answers to. She was gunning for Hagrid.
It wasn't surprising. Hagrid was one of Dumbledore's staunchest supporters, as evidenced by him returning from the giants covered in bruises and scrapes worse than I'd ever seen on the man. He also had a record the Ministry could use against him. Given that last time, they'd sent him to Azkaban, I was fast approaching the limits of my tolerance for Umbridge and for Fudge's regime.
My mind ticked through options as I helped the other prefects set up the Christmas decorations. I had to force myself to dump all variations of "kill her" into a single category to be evaluated as a whole. The problem was, eliminating her would just cause Fudge to replace her. I could kill him, but that would mean fighting my way through his Aurors and potentially crippling any ability of magical Britain to resist Voldemort once he made his move in the process.
We were in this situation in the first place because Dumbledore was using every trained combat wizard he knew in the Order, leaving him with no one to teach defense. If he'd just held one back, we wouldn't have Umbridge at all. We probably could've learned a lot from a year with the real Moody, for example. Then, something clicked into place. There was a trustworthy wizard not being occupied with the Order who Dumbledore hadn't thought of, and a way to get him here.
"Loki, I'm going to need your help," I told my dog as I worked through the details. Everything I needed was either already in Hogwarts or in the Order's headquarters. Harry had every excuse to go there and visit Sirius over the holiday. I'd need to talk to him before the holiday officially started and get his help with the plan.
I'd planned to talk to him between classes, but the next morning, neither he, nor any of the Weasleys were at breakfast. Neville and Hermione met Sloth, Luna, and I in the hall after breakfast and explained what had happened. Harry'd had a vision about a snake attacking Arthur Weasley. He and the Weasleys had been rushed out of the school shortly after.
With Umbridge now in charge of all punishments, we didn't dare cut class, but come lunchtime, the five of us descended on DUmbledore's office on mass. Dumbledore looked as though he was expecting us. Five high backed chairs were positioned across from his desk.
"To forestall your questions," said Dumbledore, "yes, Arthur was genuinely attacked. Thanks to Harry's prompt action in reporting his vision, Arthur was found in time. He is currently in stable condition at St. Mungo's. I have sent both his children and Harry to the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix at number 12 Grimauld Place, which is both secure and near to St. Mungo's so they can visit him on his ward."
"I thought convincing you to let Neville and Luna in on this would take more persuasion," I admitted.
"It seemed safer to just open the door than to have you all directing your talents toward finding a way to break the fidellius charm," replied Dumbledore. "Besides which, you have all proven yourselves many times over."
"Can we go to see Harry?" asked Hermione.
"I must insist that you stay at Hogwarts until the term is officially over," said Dumbledore. "Once that's done, I shall make arrangements for the Knight Bus to come pick you up."
"There's a fireplace in Grimauld Place," I said.
"True," said Dumbledore, "but the floo network is being monitored. And regardless, I do not want to draw any more attention to Harry's connection to Lord Voldemort than necessary."
"What is that connection?" I asked. "I thought it was Tom projecting emotions deliberately to make Harry unstable and angry to feed into Fudge's smear campaign. He's been blocking it with occlumency since Tom's resurrection. He wouldn't send Harry a warning about Mr. Weasley, though."
"It is my belief that Lord Voldemort has been unaware of the risks of the connection he inadvertently strengthened by using Harry's blood in his resurrection ritual," said Dumbledore. "As a result, Harry has been able to access some of Voldemort's thoughts and emotions when Voldemort is experiencing strong emotions."
"Harry's unconsciously performing legilimency?" asked Sloth.
"It is more fair to say that Voldemort's thoughts are boiling over the surface and spilling into Harry's mind than that Harry is doing anything in particular to draw them out," said Dumbledore.
"He needs legilimency training," I said. "This is something he needs to develop and get control of. If he can dig around in Tom's mind, he can find out where the other Horcruxes are."
"No," said Dumbledore firmly. "Lord Voldemort is a powerful legilimense, and a talented occlumens. No good will come of attempting to probe his thoughts."
"You must not like Mr. Weasley very much," said Luna.
"She's right. Good already has come of it," said Neville. "And this isn't the first time. If he'd known legilimency, he could've gotten more details last year and stopped Tom coming back at all."
"Whle those were both fortunate slips on Lord Voldemort's part, we cannot rely on him remaining so sloppy once he realizes the nature of the connection," said Dumbledore. "I know you are all eager to help, but this is not the way."
"So, we're all going?" asked Hermione briskly.
"I can meet you all at St. Mungo's," said Neville. "My gran was planning a trip anyway."
"I'll tell my parents I need to stay at Hogwarts to study for exams," said Hermione.
"My dad'll be thrilled I'm helping subvert the Ministry of Magic," said Luna.
"Well, that sounds like a plan, then," I said.
Hermione, Sloth, Luna, and I arrived at the headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix in the early evening. Riding the Knight Bus was even more terrifying than traveling by Ministry car. In addition to driving like a lunatic and relying on magic to get obstacles like pedestrians, cars, mailboxes, and buildings safely out of the way, the bus had some sort of teleport system that sounded like an explosion whenever the bus shifted from town to town. But most worryingly, none of the chairs were even bolted down, causing us to slide around the bus with every stop, start, and turn. As little as Loki had liked flying strapped under a broomstick, he seemed to like this even less, and I didn't blame him one bit.
Mrs. Weasley answered the door and welcomed us in. Harry and Ron were having a chess match on the floor in the living room, where Sirius was talking to James and Lily about Arthur's condition.
"Hard to believe the boy just closed up Arthur's wounds like it was nothing when the healers couldn't manage after days of work," said Sirius.
"Too bad it didn't do anything about the venom," said James. "Sounds like he'll be in the hospital until they find a cure if he doesn't want to bleed to death from his first paper cut once he's back in the office."
"You closed the wound?" I asked Ron.
"Sure did," he said proudly as his bishop beat one of Harry's knights senseless. "It's a good thing I kept on with my alchemy training this year."
"We really can't thank you enough," declared Mrs. Wealey, sweeping Sloth and I up in a hug.
"Hi, Hermione, Luna," said Harry. "You doing alright?"
After the initial greetings, Harry, Luna, Ron, Ginny, Hermione, Sloth, and I made our way upstairs to talk privately. As an extra precaution, we switched to parseltongue. Not fully satisfied with the precautions, Harry had a muffling charm thrown over an empty painting.
"That's a portrait of one of the former headmasters. He works for Dumbledore and reports in to him," explained Harry.
"Good thinking," I said. "Dumbledore'll be better off if he doesn't find out about this."
"You're going to teach Harry legilimency anyway," said Hermione, not quite managing disapproval in her voice.
"I would if I knew legilimency," I said. "As it is, I figure we'll need to talk to Snape about it once we're back in Hogwarts. No, I wanted to talk about getting rid of Umbridge."
"What are you thinking?" asked Harry cautiously.
"Well," I said, "Dumbledore only had to hire her because everyone else he could have asked is busy with the Order, your folks included. But I realized he overlooked Sirius."
"Sirius is a wanted criminal," declared Hermione. "He can't just walk into Hogwarts."
"He's done it before," noted Ron.
"No, that's the beauty of it," I said. "We can kill two birds with one stone. Remember last year? Barty Crouch Jr.? We pull the same trick. Sneak Sirius into the castle, incapacitate Umbridge, and have Sirius impersonate her with polyjuice."
"And as she's right under Fudge, Sirius can get evidence of everything he's been up to," said Luna.
"You realize we're talking about going up against the Ministry?" said Hermione. "If we get caught, we'll all go to Azkaban."
"If we don't act, Hagrid'll go back to Azkaban," I said.
"What?" asked Harry, alarmed.
"You've seen how she's been digging up dirt on him," I said. "Whether she finds anything or has to trump something up, you know the Ministry won't be happy with just sacking him."
"All her classes are just reading from the book," said Ginny, thoughtfully. "We could coach him on everything he needs to know."
"Fudge's wasted half a year fighting us instead of Tom," said Harry. "Maybe it is time we started hitting back."
"How are we going to sneak Sirius out of here without him being missed if we're planning to keep Dumbledore out of this?" asked Hermione. It was a practical question. Everyone was done objecting once Harry made up his mind.
I stroked Loki's head and said, "Sirius has been sulking over not being useful lately. I'm thinking once Harry leaves again, he'll get so moody he'll start sulking as a dog."
"Switch him for Loki? That's brilliant!" said Ron.
"It won't take much transfiguration to swap their builds and coloration," said Hermione.
"Loki's probably safer here as Sirius' double than he'd be at Hogwarts anyway," I said. "Only a matter of time before Umbridge tried to hurt him to get to me."
"This doesn't mean we have to stop the DA, does it?" asked Luna.
Harry shook his head. "Sirius'll have to pretend to be her in classes still, and that means being a rubbish teacher."
Grimauld Place was surprisingly cheery over the holidays. Harry's parents and the Weasleys were around the whole holiday. Lots of questions about our school year were asked. We denied ever having formed the DA, and complained freely about Umbridge. Attempts were made to get the Order members to talk about what they were guarding, but no one really expected success at that.
Harry'd approached Sirius in private, and he proved every bit as enthusiastic about he plan as I'd hoped. Sirius recruited James and Lupin to help cover for him while he was out. He explained about Loki serving as his double, and they didn't ask where he was going.
Bill spoke freely about what he'd managed to learn about the security around the Lestrange vault. It was extreme, but not impregnable. No security was absolute. In addition to being past the thief's downfall, a product of goblin magic that washes away all active spell effects, including things like polyjuice and the Imperius curse, there was a dragon chained up outside. The wall would only open at the touch of a Gringotts employed goblin, then you get into the security inside the vault itself. The gold was charmed to heat to flesh searing temperatures and multiply itself when disturbed. The duplication was temporary like leprechaun gold, but it lasted long enough to crush and burn any intruder.
Sloth and I could hop down to the vault today based on what Bill told us. The real problem was that doing so would piss off the goblins. As it was, Voldemort had made a robbery attempt a few years back using Quirrell, and that, more than anything else, made the goblins disinclined to sign on to his side in the coming war. They had plenty of grievances against the Ministry of Magic, chief among them the wand ban for nonhumans, but the last thing we wanted to do was give them a reason to overlook or consider balanced out Voldemort's robbery attempt.
Gaining access to the vault through legitimate means was problematic. As Sirius aptly demonstrated, being a known fugitive on the run from the dementors mattered not in the slightest to the goblins. They were extremely independent from the Ministry, and had no mechanism for forfeiting the contents of a criminal's vault. Once the Lestranges died in Azkaban, the vault's contents would be passed on to their closest relatives and next of kin, the Malfoys, which was hardly better.
This year, I'd gotten everyone remembralls, so we could check regularly if our memories had been modified. It was unlikely with our occlumency training, but seemed better safe than sorry. Plus, they'd serve as useful study aids in our OWL year, even if they weren't allowed during the test itself.
Mrs. Weasley had knitted us all sweaters. Harry had gotten me a knife, which was supposed to be able to open any lock, even those charmed to protect against normal unlocking spells. Sirius had gotten him one last year. Sloth had given me a book filled with drawings of all the major events that had happened since coming to Hogwarts. She'd gotten very good indeed, approaching the photo realism of Alex Loius Armstrong's artwork.
Fred and George apparated into the room while we were going through our gifts. They warned us not to go downstairs just yet, as Mrs. Weasley was crying. Percy had returned his gifts unopened. Apparently, he hadn't even asked after his father's health while he was in the hospital.
After Mrs. Weasley had settled down and we all had lunch, our group headed to St. Mungo's for a visit with Arthur. The wizard hospital was concealed behind a barrier similar to the one at King's Cross Station. We stepped through a display window in front of a closed shop and found ourselves in the lobby. He was pleased to see us, and chatted happily about the continuing search for an antivenom. They apparently had him on a regular blood replenishing potion.
I offered to make him a homunculus, but he brushed the offer off. James and Lily still weren't legally recognized as themselves, and there would be problems if he was found out. Besides, he wanted to help the hospital find the antivenom in case they needed it to treat the victims of another attack by Voldemort's snake.
We met Neville there as planned. He was visiting his parents there, who had been driven permanently insane by prolonged use of the Cruciatus curse by Belatrix Lestrange. It was what got her imprisoned in Azkaban. Neville came down with us, along with his grandmother, to visit Arthur and wish him a speedy recovery.
The healers did eventually find an antivenom, and Arthur returned to Grimauld Place before the end of the holiday. There was a sense of anticipation in the air as the time to return to Hogwarts approached. We made the switch of Sirius for Loki at the last possible minute, during the distracting jumble of last minute packing, hugs goodbye, and well wishes. One trip on the Knight Bus later, and we were back at Hogwarts, ready to implement stage two of the plan.
Sirius followed me as I attended my classes the first day like Loki usually did. He was far more poorly trained than Loki, which I feared might prove a giveaway. Fortunately, he wouldn't have to keep up the chirade for long. At the end of my first day of classes, I headed down to Umbridge's office.
"Professor Umbridge," I said as I entered. "I have something important to tell you. It's about Professor Trelawney."
"She's one of your favorite teachers, isn't she?" said Umbridge, adopting her falsely sweet voice. "I understand you dropped Arithmancy so you could continue taking lessons with her."
The reminder of my confiscated time turner was deliberate. A measured reminder that she had the power to take things away form me. It was a pity the plan called for her to be captured alive. I took out a notebook and showed it to her.
"I've kept track of all Professor Trelawney's predictions since my first class with her. Whenever one turns out to be true or false, I make a note of it in another column. She's got a really good track record. Look."
"As you are not the Hogwarts High Inquisitor, Mr. Oren, it is not your opinion of... Professor... Trelawney's abilities that matters."
"But don't you remember? She predicted you were in danger! She was right." That last sentence was spoken in a cold, calm voice without a hint of the previous pleading. I raised my wand and a jet of blue light flew from the tip, knocking her unconscious. The DA meetings had significantly improved my ability to emulate a stunning spell.
At my side, Sirius shook off his Loki disguise and resumed human form. He cut off a hair from her unconscious form as I fished a vial of polyjuice out of my bag.
"You know she won't remember any of that once we modify her memory and let her go at the end of the year, right?" said Sirius, dropping the hair into the potion.
"I got to see the look on her face," I replied. "That's all that matters."
Making sure his clothing wouldn't get in the way, Sirius downed the contents of my vial and transformed into a duplicate of Professor Umbridge. He gagged and wrinkled his nose, saying, "Taking that every hour for the rest of the hear is the one downside of this plan."
Snatching up her wand, Sirius bound her with conjured ropes and stuffed her into a trunk. He cast a spell to muffle sounds from the trunk and started going through her papers.
"I'll leave you to your preparations," I said, placing a tray with twenty four crstal vials on Umbridge's desk. See you in class."
Leaving the office, I went to find Harry and the others. I found them working on the day's homework in teh library. Everyone looked very distracted.
"It's done," I hissed in parseltongue. "Now it's time to go see Snape."
"I still don't like this part of the plan," hissed Harry as he packed his books. "This'll mean pretending to take remedial potions again. My mom'll kill me if I can't pass my potions OWL with all these extra lessons I'm not actually having."
"You know you're not really bad at it," hissed Ron. "Snape just grades you unfairly to suck up the Slytherins."
"That does make it harder to assess where he actually is in the class, though," noted Hermione.
"Oh well," said Harry. "I might get lucky and Dumbledore'll have forbidden Snape from teaching me legilimency."
"The headmaster has expressly forbidden me from teaching you legilimency, Potter," said Snape. "He is under the impression that if you are trained in legilimency, you will do something foolish like try to look into the Dark Lord's mind throuh the connection you share. I, on the other hand, know differently."
"You do?" asked Harry, looking between Snape and us.
A smug smile crept over Snape's features. "I do, Potter. The truth is, you will recklessly attempt to access the Dark Lord's mind in any case, under the misguided idea that doing so would qualify as helping in the effort to defeat him. The only difference is that without proper legilimency training, your efforts to do so will be clumsy, obvious, and will likely open your mind up to the Dark Lord's influence long before you acquired any useful information."
"So you'll teach me?" asked Harry.
"Certain conditions must apply to my answer," said Snape with a frown. "First, the headmaster must never hear about this. Take nay information you acquire to me, and I will bring it to the Order's attention in such a way as to not reveal you as the source. Secondly, you must swear to attempt no legilimency against the Dark Lord until I say. As a skillful occlumens, he will detect your initial, clumsy intrusions, and be put on his guard."
"Why do you get the credit for anything Harry learns?" demanded Ron.
"Intelligence work is not about credit, Mr. Weasley," said Snape, not quite rolling his eyes. "It is about giving your side accurate information. Any information retrieved from the Dark Lord's mind must be considered suspect until it is independently verified. My position within the Dark Lord's inner circle affords me more chances to verify, and a plausible place for me to have learned things without informing the headmaster of your determination to ignore his instructions."
"When can we start?" asked Hermione.
"We," Snape emphasized, "will not be starting at all. I have agreed to teach Potter, not your entire little clique. With the Dark Lord risen, I do have other strains on my time these days. Besides which, absolutely no one would believe you need to take remedial potions, Miss Granger."
"But I do," said Neville, screwing up his courage to face the man who was his boggart. "You don't have to teach me, but I'm not leaving Harry alone with you."
"Do you no longer consider your basilisk a sufficient threat, Longbottom?" asked Snape disdainfully.
"She might not recognize what you might do as an attack," said Neville.
"No one'll believe it really is just remedial potions if Neville isn't there," said Luna. "He's the worst student in the class."
"Way to show your support," said Ron with mock enthusiasm.
"So, we're agreed?" I said.
"Very well," said Snape.
With two new conspiracies set in motion, I settled down to bed in the Ravenclaw dorms feeling accomplished and invigorated. We were finally making progress against our revealed enemies. The next morning brought news of a setback. In the Daily Prophet, news of ten of Voldemort's Death Eaters escaping Azkaban was front page news.
Fudge was blaming Sirius rather than admit he was wrong about Voldemort being back. The Lestrangers were among those out of Azkaban. I wasn't sure, but it felt like that should provide an opening to get access to their vault and the horcrux within. Unfortunately, nothing was coming immediately to mind.
In my first defense class with Sirius, it was clear he was planning to take full advantage of the news. Life sized wanted posters of each of the escaped Death Eaters were up on the board. Beneath each was a list of their crimes.
"Good afternoon, class," said Sirius just as we'd coached him over the holiday.
"Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge," chimed the class dully.
"Wands away," said Sirius unnecessarily. "As we finished chapter sixteen last lesson, I would like you all to put your copies of Defensive Magical Theory away and retrieve your quills."
People stopped turning pages in their books after taking a moment to process that the lesson would not be silent reading.
"As many of you have no doubt heard, a number of former members of the Death Eaters have escaped from Azkaban. The crimes for which they were imprisoned and the means the Aurors used to apprehend them should serve as a good set of real workd examples of what you've been studying."
He was still eschewing practical training and sticking with theory, but Sirius walked us through detailed case studies of the criminal careers of the ten escaped Death Eaters. He discussed their dueling styles and favorite spells. He detailed the investigative process used in the last war and after to track down Voldemort's supporters. It was as informative and interesting as a pure theory class could be. I was feeling really good about my decision to have the woman replaced.
"Do you suppose Sirius overdid it?" asked Ron that evening when we met for his alchemy lesson. "I mean, someone's bound to notice he's teaching useful stuff."
"I guess he's counting on everyone assuming the Death Eater breakouts got the Ministry to soften its policy," I said, finishing my check of the security. "Okay, so we finished amplifiers last term, so today, we're going to start in on how you use the Gate to travel between worlds."
Author's comments:
Our heroes are taking the war seriously, reaching for every advantage they can get their hands on.