Of Fights and Fires
I was planning to use dashes to separate the two scenes in this chapter, but the site doesn't like showing them. Also, they don't like me writing the name of the site. Weird.
I don't own Pokémon or Pokémon Ranger, savvy? On with the story!
There's a little boy sitting on the bed in front of me. He's wearing a white hospital robe and a vacant expression, his eyes cast downwards towards the floor. He only looks about twelve, but the look in his eyes is too old for his body. He must be cold in that gown, but he seems completely unresponsive.
He stirs in his stupor to pick up a knife from beside him on the bed. I can see the imprint of the knife in the bed sheets. The boy twirls the knife in his fingers a few times before tilting his head to one side and pressing the sharp end of the knife again his jugular. I can see the vein throbbing beneath the skin like he's excited, or maybe scared.
I take the steps across the brown carpeted floor to cover the distance between the two of us and kneel down in front of him. He doesn't move to acknowledge my existence, staring unblinkingly and unfocused into the distance. I put one hand on his exposed knee and whisper to him.
"Let me take whatever is hurting you, so you may go back to the way you should be."
He still doesn't react, but I'm worried about that knife. I stand up again and gently pry it from his fingers. He doesn't resist. I put it back on the bed in the same place as it was lying before it was moved and rest my head on his forehead. He finally looks up at me in confusion. I look back.
"It'll be fine now," I say. "Nothing will ever hurt you again."
He smiles and nods, and somehow I know everything will be fine.
I slowly open my eyes. The vision of the boy on the bed has left, to be replaced by a cloud of white fog. I feel warmth radiating all around me, like I'm on fire. It's not wholly unpleasant, to be honest. My head is throbbing painfully, and my joints seem to want to join in as well.
I blink a few times to clear my vision. Something starts licking my cheek, and I can see that it's Pachirisu. I cautiously lift one arm and pat her on her head. She rubs herself into the crook of my neck, sending tiny little sparks running up and down my arm like pins and needles.
Anyone awake in there?
Just a sec. I think my head's stuck.
I turn my head to see where that warmth is coming from. The Ninetails I apprehended has its tails wrapped around me to protect me from the cold. Thank God – it's practically glacial in here.
OK, I'm free. What happened.
We fell off the ice above us. Hang on a minute... I cast my eyes up to the afore-mentioned ice. I can't see it, but I can hear that ominous creaking. I force myself up and crawl out of the canopy. Just in time too; as soon as I'm out of range a few sizeable chunks of ice fall to the place where certain precious organs of mine had been.
Ouch.
Amen. Now that I'm finally up and moving around again I can see the damage I just caused. The table is completely destroyed, along with everything that was on it. No wonder I'm in so much pain. I can't imagine falling on that candelabrum would be fun.
So much for almost dying when I'm in control!
This doesn't count.
Actually, now that I think about it, it was you who was in control when that Spiritomb tried to kill us! Not me! Shove over!
Well, sorry.
You can make it up to me by letting me come out. I've got cramp.
You'd have that whether you were out or not.
Shush. Logic has no power over me! I'm overcome by a wave of pain, but I fight it down. We've still got a Mission to complete.
It would be more sensible for us to go back for medical treatment. Carrying on is just stupid.
Sometimes, Light, you just gotta dare to be stupid.
Oh, Lord have mercy.
Don't be turning religious on me now! We've got violent situations to get into yet! With a great deal of effort I get myself to my feet, much to the rage of my hamstrings. Now that I'm moving around the cold starts to stab at my skin again. I'm gonna miss this Ninetails.
I wish we had a Fire-type as a Partner Pokémon.
But Electric-types only have one weakness: Ground-types! Fire-types are weak to Water-, Ground- and Rock-types.
Touché.
Gesundheit. Now, let's get cracking. I get the Ninetails to melt the epic ice block covering the way forward. It takes a few minutes, so it must have been pretty compact.
Wow, you're actually sounding smart.
Maybe that blow knocked something back into place. I mean, hey! That's not nice!
Got you.
Rawr. The Ninetails leaves, taking all its glorious heat with it. I've got goosebumps all over my legs now. I look like a plucked chicken. Mmm... chicken.
Stay on track.
Huh? Oh, right, the door. I carry on through and up the stairs. I wish this place was symmetrical. It bothers me something fierce that it isn't. I come out on the canopy of ice again, but from a different angle. Half of the floor is gone. Oops. The lack of floor must have made what's left unstable, because it starts to break under my feet. I leg it to the other side without injury.
I'm surprised.
I'm not. I'm practically a superhero! Besides, I can't die! I'm the main character!
Excuse me?
Oh, you too.
That's not what I meant.
There are more stairs leading up. We must be heading towards the roof. I spend a brief moment outside, but it's enough to know that the snowstorm hasn't even cleared up yet.
Fancy getting stuck in an abandoned castle during a snowstorm. Typical.
We can't even make snow angels!
We weren't going to make snow angels anyway.
But Light!
No.
Spoilsport. I can hear talking coming from up ahead. I sidle up against the wall like the superhero that I am and listen.
"Hey, what do you think of our boss?" one rasps. "Do you think we did all right with Ice?"
It must be an inside thing, 'cause I have no idea what he means by 'Ice' with a capital 'I'.
"Personally, I'm cool with Ice. You know how Lavana blows up in a rage for no reason. And Heath is a pain to cheer up if and when he gets depressed."
Uhh... I think my brain just started dripping out my ears. The time of intelligence has passed.
Well, that's good. I didn't want you stealing my spotlight.
Let's go and say hi! I skip up to them and wave. They all pale very quickly, and I don't think it's from the cold.
"... Aww, no!" one whines. "It's that Ranger we were warned about! This is just humiliating! We'll just make you forget you heard anything!"
He sends some Seedot at me. I won't go into the fight – I only use about ten loops anyway. They all leg it before I can give them a real beating, not that I would anyway, and let me have a look at an ominous-looking door. I like that door. That is a nice door. It suspiciously resembles that one in that volcano on Boyleland that we used a Ghost-type to get through. I don't remember all the details, but I do know it was epic. And had a Muk behind it.
Well, hop to it then!
OK, Mommy. There are two doors – one leading forward and one down. I'm sick of walking up and down stairs so I just keep going. I cross a walkway and come to a door with two lanterns. Luckily, they're both already lit so the door isn't locked. That's a relief – I'd have hated having to back track for miles just to find a couple of Vulpix to open the door for me!
... Plot holes.
It was magic, OK? Inside is a very convenient yet unfriendly Mismagius. I teach it some respect and drag it back to open the door for me. I've just thought... isn't this like animal cruelty?
Fanfic authors love to write about that. We're going to be original and not mention it.
Oh... Does that mean no shipping either?
Oh, God, knowing the morons in this story I dearly hope not.
OK, Mommy.
Stop that.
I'm just winding you up. I go through the newly opened door. There are more ice floors of doom. I know better than to head straight, because there's probably stuff to the sides that allows me to progress. It's always that way to make you take detours. Especially in Zelda games.
You better not be promoting games other than Pokémon here.
I was dissing it, technically. To both sides are two Riolu, and I doubt there's two of them just for the hell of it. It Capture them, if only they'd stop bouncing around like space hoppers. One I've finally got them I continue forward, without falling off the edge. Yes, really.
There's someone here. A guy with blue hair and blue clothes to match is pacing around in front of a magical wall of trespass refusal. He looks annoyed. I don't blame him. The back of his head looks very familiar, somehow…
"I heard someone come in..." he says levelly.
I wince.
So much for being covert.
He turns around to reveal himself to be... Hang on, I know that face!
"My guess is a little kid playing Ranger while slipping and sliding around the icy floor... Bingo, eh?"
I fume slightly. I'm clearly sixteen-years-old. Who does he think I am – Light?
Watch it.
"Heheh, sorry, sorry. Don't get angry. Chill, all right?" he chuckles while spinning around and pulling gay poses. "My name's Ice!"
So that's what those guys were talking about when they said 'Ice' with a capital 'I'.
"I was just joking," he says icily, like his name. "I know you're a Top Ranger. You're name is, uh... Light-noob."
LOL, he called you a noob.
I think you'll find he called you a noob. & st0p tlkin li3k dt LOL ZOMGBBQ.
I think the quality of this is seriously lacking.
"You're after something blue, aren't you?" Ice states, the little know-it-all. I pull a bratty pose as a display of my wish to tell him nothing. "I know all about that. One of my guys happened to overhear that Voicemail you got in Shiver Camp. He tells me the Voicemail was ridiculously loud."
True.
This means there's a traitor in Shiver Camp. We have got to let Rhythmi know about this.
He asks if I want to team up with him, but he's only half serious. I shrug in agreement, also only half serious. He says something about him taking the Blue Gem and me getting an ice cream, which sounds OK to me but Rhythmi would foot slap me.
That's called 'kicking'.
Nonsense! It's what I say it is. He summons a Froslass with a Miniremo, which just makes the room get colder. I whip out my Styler to battle it.
You'd better not show us up.
Don't worry about me! The Froslass makes the first move. She creates several little balls of icy blue fire and sends them flying at me. I dodge out of the way in time to feel the aura of ice pass by me, sending goosebumps up my arms. Pachirisu jumps off my shoulder and dashes towards the Froslass. Without being prompted she shocks her hard.
Cat fight. Next it'll be hair pulling.
While she's dazed I get a few rings around her. She doesn't seem pleased and makes large icicles fall from the ceiling. I wish one would hit Ice but I doubt that Froslass is going to willingly hurt her own master. None hit me or Pachirisu, thankfully. I'd get more than a concussion from one of those things.
Overall, it isn't that hard. The Froslass scarpers off to who-knows-where once I've Captured it. Ice doesn't seem fazed.
"Oh, yeah, OK... You're better than I expected. I'll try not to be so careless the next time we meet."
He scarpers off too. So much scarpering today...
Sun?
Yeah?
How about progressing.
Oh, yeah! As I approach the barrier the two Riolu start reacting. As if they already know what to do, they both stand by each of the two Riolu statues that stand resolutely in front of the barrier, and use two Force Palms. Instead of shattering the barrier like I thought it would, the barrier wobbles like jelly and evaporates.
It's gonna be hard to beat that.
Well, if two Riolu got us through the barrier, you get three guesses as to what's on the other side.
... Oh I know! A Hariyama!
... What?
They both learn Force Palm by levelling up.
Not even close.
Happiny? They're both baby Pokémon and members of the No Eggs group.
Still no.
It has to be a Primeape then. Both have the Fighting-type as their primary and only type.
Just get through the door already!
Fine, sheesh! I get through the door already. There's a huge cave at the back which must have been carved out of the mountain behind the castle. I was totally not expecting this. It's dark and smells like pee.
Let's make this quick then.
OK Mommy.
Oh, for Pete's sake.
As I'm about to get to the end of the tunnel where the Tear of Princes presumably is I get a Voicemail from Rhythmi.
"Voicemail! Voicemail!" she says over the Styler. "You're in Almia Castle now, aren't you?"
Right, let's turn Amber's Thingy on... Yup! You're a sight for sore eyes, let me tell ya.
She blushes. I wonder why?
"Thanks, but now isn't the time for this," she says, more composed now. "We're getting indications that a tough Pokémon is ahead of you. Are you ready for it?"
Don't worry: I figure it's either a Hariyama, Happiny or Primeape so that's not too bad. Got to go now. See ya!
I disconnect the Voicemail and switch Amber's Thingy off.
You're making me sound like an idiot. Everyone at the HQ thought it was me saying those things! They probably suspect you're high or something.
No comment. Now, let's dash bravely and stupidly into the unknown! I do just that before I come across a strange sight. There's a glowing blue gem over there. Ooh... shiny. I go to give it a poke, when the lanterns behind me suddenly light up.
Look what you did. You broke it!
It was like that when I got here, I swear. A scuffling sound comes from the ceiling. It better not be a spider! I hate spiders! Wait, it's only a Lucario. Whew, that was a close one.
Hang on a minute.
While I'm standing around in a mild daze the Lucario makes a run at me. It moves too fast for me to do anything except throw my arms over my face. I hear an explosion and a loud squeak, and I lower my arms in time to see Pachirisu go flying across the room and into a wall.
Great work.
I want to go and see if she's OK but the Lucario makes another go for me. I jump sideways and narrowly avoid an Aura Sphere that had a date with my skull. I don't wanna do this without Pachirisu to help me!
You haven't got a choice. Just get moving.
Uhh... Right! The Lucario darts around the room to try and confuse me, which it does quite well. Without hesitating it charges at me and smacks me in the chest with the Force Palm that hurt Pachirisu. Luckily I'm several times the size of her and it didn't hurt me as much as it did her.
I get back up, my bones yelling again. After previously falling a storey onto a table, I was already in enough pain, thank you! I try running with it to stop it from confusing me, which works pretty well now that I can keep my eyes on it. I even get a few loops in there for good measure.
Then it figures out that I can't see it if it stands further away. It does a back flip and disappears into the fog that clouds my vision. I gulp, trying to hear it over the roaring in my ears. My heart is pounding too hard for anything else to be heard.
Much to my relief the Lucario comes at me from the front, giving me an opening. I call its bluff and jump towards it. It shies away at the last minute to avoid colliding with a flying Ranger and, after I land with a roll, it's looped like something being looped a lot.
Wow, your metaphors are top notch.
It's only true! The Lucario doesn't like being Captured one bit and surrounds itself with its own aura. I wish I could do that. It charges at me and takes a fancy to Close Combat, smacking me over the head several times and then catching me on the back of the leg so I fall over. I roll to the left just in time to avoid taking a Focus Punch to the stomach.
Now's your chance: while it's stuck in the ground.
How clichéd. Regardless of the lack of originality of this event, I take the lull in the action to Capture the Lucario forever and ever. Well, maybe not.
Did I do good?
If Pachirisu's OK, then yes.
I whiz over to the fallen Pokémon's side. She's unconscious but still breathing, and doesn't seem to be in too much pain. She winces when I put too much pressure on her right arm, but that's all.
OK, you did good. Dinner's on me.
Technically that means it's on me too!
That's what I said. Dinner's on you.
A bright light catches my eye. I stand up, Pachirisu encased in my arms, to see the Lucario holding the Blue Gem. It silently holds it out to me as an offering. I wriggle Pachirisu around so I'm only holding her in one arm and take the gem with the other hand. It stops shining so brightly when I take it, which is good because it was hurting my eyes.
The Lucario bows to me, and I bow back slightly. My back hurts too much to do much more. It bends its legs and jumps up and out of sight. Mission clear. The warmth coming off the gem stops the cold from taking my fingers off, but my whole body still hurts. Here's hoping I don't pass out on the way back.
You better not. Imagine being stuck out here with an injured Pokémon. We'd be a sitting duck for any Dim Sun stragglers.
That would suck. OK, let's head for the exit. I tuck the stone into my back pocket – it just fits. I take Pachirisu back into both arms so I'm less likely to drop her and start walking. My head is throbbing in time with my heart. It makes me feel all lightheaded.
Steady now.
You don't have to tell me. Back at the Riolu statues is a glowing light circle in the floor. This is turning into the Legend of Zelda again. I'm too tired to start complaining, though, and step inside. I shut my eyes from the light, and I'm back at the entrance when I open them. Why couldn't they have been there in other places!
Maybe it responds to the blue gem we just collected.
More like nicked. I go to open the door when I get a Voicemail from Rhythmi.
"Have you got the blue gem?" she asks. I nod. "That's great! Prof. Hastings is waiting at the Union, so you need to hurry back! I'll see you here, OK?"
Hmm... Might be a problem there.
"Why?"
I open the door. The snow storm that's been raging for the past few hours is still venting it anger on the castle. I can see even less than normal but I can hear the howling winds and it isn't something I want to be walking around in.
"Oh..." she says quietly. "That complicates things... Hold on a sec."
She leaves the screen to go and talk to someone, I presume. Meanwhile I struggle with the door. Trying to get a heavy wooden door closed with one hand in a snow storm is nothing to laugh at. Rhythmi comes back after discussing the situation with insert name here
"OK, Light, here's what we're gonna do," she states authoritatively. "You're going to have to spend the night at the castle. Once the storm's cleared up we'll send Sven or Wendy to come and get you, OK?"
A sleepover in a haunted castle. Piece of cake.
"Glad you agree. Hang in there. Oh, and Angel says 'hi'."
She signs off. Was it just me or did she sound slightly venomous?
It's Angel. She's jealous.
Why? They both have the same job.
I'll tell you when you have hormones.
Right... We need a fire. I take a few pieces of wood from the trashed table and rub them together. The sparks start a small blaze, which I feed with kindling; also from the table. Looks like it was more than decorative: it was also useful!
Well...
I sit cross-legged next to the fire, examining Pachirisu. I can't see any damage, so it must just be bruising. I'll say the same for myself.
I'll let a doctor decide that.
Doctor Who! I hope he comes and takes me back in time. I'm gonna kill that person who put Dad's red boxers in with my white shirts back in '02.
That was you, you moron.
Oh yeah... As I'm sitting by the fire an unusual menagerie of Pokémon start to gather around. Once they decide I'm not going to eat them alive (though it's tempting) they curl up around the fire. The warmth from not only the blaze but the tens of Pokémon and the blue gem chases off the lingering effects of the cold.
About time.
I smile to myself at the heart-warming scene and lie down carefully so I don't crush anyone's tails. The floor is freezing but the heat around me makes it feel a bit better.
I hope we get a lie in tomorrow.
I bet 1000 Pokémon Dollars we don't.
Oh, you're on!