34

The past two weeks went by incredibly fast for both.

Katsuki:

He had went to Dr. Toshinori everyday, and slowly was allowing himself to converse more with him about what his mom's 'significant other' had done to him when he was little. But, he didn't cry over it, realizing by telling two people already that he was coming to accept what had happened, that it was out of his hands, that there was nothing he could of done that could of changed it. He'd never said anything about the twins his mother was pregnant with or about his dad killing the man, but did tell Toshi his parents had died while going on 'vacation' (which it wasn't, his dad was taking his mom to hide her somewhere from the gang that was after them after he killed the boyfriend, to keep her safe and probably away from drugs).

He'd went on describe to Toshinori how he had no idea when he was little that the man had planted that sense of 'craving' inside his body, and whenever he'd do something that would spark it, that his grandma would just take it away that object (if she caught it that was), but not explain why.

He'd even went so far as to give into saying that he openly bought drugs from a man that posted himself down the street (not really understanding that 'drugs' was actually what they were), which was between both the elementary and middle school he went to; that he was the guy to see if he wanted those things and how he'd more less overheard it in conversation. How his sense to feel good was so strong that it pulled him instantly to go inquire about how much it cost.

How he spent so much money on X-ON, when he had money.

How he hid it from everyone because of the how ludicrous his grandma had acted towards him feeling good, yanking things out of his hands, and how he supposed from that, that nobody else would like to know, thought that maybe him feeling good like that was breaking a rule or something, but he'd never been told it was 'against the rules'.

Dr. Toshinori went on to explain that his grandmother was lax in parenting by never saying crap about why it was not right, if it supposedly wasn't right.

Bakugo agreed, but said she was the only family he had, but since he'd never been told otherwise, he just bought the stuff from the guy and continued on his way, getting good enough grades to not be caught onto, striving to get into UA to become a hero, even while everyone thought he was an asshole with how he treated Deku; more suited to be a villain.

He'd explained to Toshinori what it felt like on it. How euphoric it was. He would loose time, and in that state, he was okay with that, because time would go by easier. He felt like he was rocking, as if by waves, being lulled gently by the drug, and he'd just lay on his bed and listen to music, stare at the ceiling. But there were other things: how it made him more sexual much earlier than most, somehow it sparked a libido that was confusing to him at that early-ish age (eventually he came to gather that X-ON pushed on his senses), how it made his skin tingle, how he would have thoughts dance through his head about certain 'activities' people did with other people, how it made him want to touch himself, and how the drug had started him down that path, but somehow, now that he was off of it, that need was much less, more normal he figured.

He'd explained how the drug's withdrawals were: Horrible. In it he'd come to understand that it was fucking up his body because of how severe it was when he was off of it. First it was simple things like sweating, increased anger, and an increased sense of paranoia, then headaches, really bad ones that left his skull feeling like it was splitting into two pieces. Then, as the upswing of it started to happen, came the inability to eat, anything that went down, it was flu symptoms. He'd immediately throw it right back up, puking so hard that it was nothing but stomach acid, and he remained that way for at least four days, so out of it that he wasn't even sure where he was, shaking, hot and cold flashes, inability to move and pull himself out of bed. He'd find himself drooling and have to wipe his mouth off, like his glands were malfunctioning. But swiftly, it got better.

After that huge mountain of illness, suddenly it was gone, his grandma attending to him because she thought he had a severe flu, and kept him out of school for almost a week (as to not let the other kid's 'catch it').

He'd even went on and told Toshinori about Midoriya.

How he hated him for his perseverance in wanting to continue on being his friend, all the while, all he wanted was for him just to stay out of his shit life, to remain clueless so he could retain his innocence, maintain and live out the rest of his childhood like a normal person.

"As you describe him, that seems to be Midoriya's 'thing'."

"What?"

"The persistence. When he wants something he doesn't jus'follow, he chases."

Bakugo smirked. "Yeh. What an asshole."

He pushed up on his glasses. Normally he wouldn't condone that, but it was Bakugo after all, but the tone was more of a make-fun than a scream, a friendly smack-you-on-the-arm make-fun. "I bet it wasn't easy pushin' him away."

"Nah. It wasn't. It's still not." He sipped on a coffee. "But after while, closer t'the end of middle school, he started t'get it."

"Have you tried to speak t'him since?"

"No." Quick.

"Why?"

"It's not fixable. I screamed at him f'too long. Shitty nerd." The 'shitty nerd' came out in-cruel, but he did scoff.

Toshnori smirked. "What about All Might then?"

"He's the perfect hero in Deku's mind. Perfect example of justice. It pisses me off."

Toshinori just wanted to understand.

"Because he's everything t'Deku that I knew I could never be... because of my shit life. Because of my addiction."

Yagi got it. He got it! He couldn't help but smile as the teen looked away.

Bakugo did all the bullying because he GAVE A SHIT. With how much he yelled, screamed, kicked, it came off as extreme hate, and there was a hate there, he could feel it, but deep inside the blonde's heart existed purity. He wanted to save Midoriya from seeing, hearing, understanding his horrors so that he could go on freely, finishing out his young years in a good manner.

But unfortunately, for Midoriya, that bit him all in the ass, as rather than taking the hint very early on that Bakugo wanted to be left alone, it took him a number of years of Bakugo tormenting him to actually begin to 'get it'.

Midoriya had been dragging himself through the mud on purpose, attempting to save their friendship.

On both ends, Izuku and Katsuki were screwing it up, both thinking it was the right thing to do for the other's sake.

Izuku knowing that something was wrong and trying to desperately hold on, only to get chewed up in the process taking the pain and agony of Bakugo screaming and bullying him, and Bakugo bullying and screaming for him to stay away to save him from his horrors, it even spilled over into yelling at everyone else, not letting a single soul get close to him.

It was a vicious circle.

"A cycle that needs t'end."

"Hn?" He turned from looking out the window at the snow.

"That's what it is between you and him."

"Y'know before I met Kasaya, I'd scream at someone who'd try to put our names in the same sentence." Hot steam came out of his mug.

"Yea?"

"Yeh." He sipped. "I..." Bakugo smiled earnestly.

It shook Dr. Toshinori up. That smile. It was... good. Not evil, not mean, no crazy eyes, fire blazing. It was pleasant, like you were having dinner with an old friend and you'd said something funny that stirred up a good memory.

"I wanted t'be the best, t'beat out All Might to prove I was better than him... but Aiwaza was right."

"What'd my guy say?" He chuckled. 'Wanted'. Past tense. He said 'wanted'?

"That I can't jus'best him and suddenly Midoriya would think of me as great."

"That's true." The blonde doctor put some hair behind his right ear.

"Kasaya's brought me t'this point..." He swallowed. "And I think it's jus'time for me t'end this rivalry I have with him, even though he sort of started it."

"Hm?" That made Toshinori sit straight up in his chair. The admittance of that! Was he being serious?

"I have t'get a handle on'hatin' All Might so much. I've gotta learn t'stop."

"So, you're layin' it down?"

"Anything dealin' with Deku, yeh. I'm gunna try not t'yell. It doesn't matter anymore... not now. Does it?" He looked up to his therapist. Earnest. He wanted him to tell him.

Toshinori smiled big, his insides warm, stomach flipping from the sudden turn. "It's okay to move on, when you're ready."

"I am. Kasaya's more important t'me than anything now. That's my future not any of'this other shit."

Kasaya:

He'd made it through the coursework, passed with help from his boyfriend constantly sitting by him. Bakugo's way of cheering him on was to always be present, always be there as a pillar of strength, to explain things to him when he didn't understand something. They would read together, they'd highlight together, they'd talk about the articles inside the material together, every night Suki would spread his legs open on the couch and sit behind him, a leg on each side, sometimes wrapping his arms around his waist just listening to his voice as he read, his chin on one of his shoulders after they'd eat dinner and just 'be there'.

He'd realized his mistake in his rage that day he beat on Aiwaza, when suddenly it became all about what he was going through, and was fully intent on making that up, not just with a quick 'here are some flowers and a few I'm sorries', but by being involved actively, which he knew showed that he actually did care.

Saya couldn't be more happy.

He was falling so hard.

Falling. Falling. Falling.

And... he was beginning to like spicy food? Bakugo had brought back Siracha chicken pizza that night that he'd been dancing. He didn't even know that was possible!

But also, Suki was making him a better student.

Kasaya was beginning to grasp that even on surface level stuff, that they were revolving each other, evolving each other to be better, encouraging each other to do better, to step up, to be not little whisps in the wind, but charging soldiers on a field.

He'd told Bakugo about wanting to be a hero, about how he'd teared and cried into Aiwaza's jeans it wretched him up so bad, because he'd wanted to be absolutely nothing, a nobody with no goals who just wanted to be left alone, who thought of himself as too dangerous to be close to anyone, about how he'd spoken Ashley's last name, all the while Katsuki putting a finger over his mouth to stop him from saying her name, knowing the exact 'who' he was talking about.

How he hated it when her name would come out of his mouth.

Katsuki was supportive, but worried, because he knew what that meant.

It meant coming to terms, and moving past it, just like he was with his past. It also meant that Kasaya had let Aiwaza in on an integral piece, just a last name, but still, it was something huge that they were going to do. That he and Kasaya were going to do together, that might possibly mean killing someone, but also releasing a bunch of people from pain and suffering, possible death.

Bakugo was there with him the whole way.

But achieving this meant also... Kasaya going forward with the more technical side of Merge School: Having nodes put all over his body, pulses of electricity running through them, a very low electricity, and being confined in a space where all he's hear for days straight were sets of sound waves.

It meant no alcohol as his brain's consciousness was to be merged with his consciousness.

"You drink don't you?" Aiwaza stood aside him in a room with a bed, a bed used in mental asylums with shackles on it, a machine in the corner for electricity, and another with huge speakers.

Kasaya turned wide-eyed and looked at him.

"I can'smell it on your breath sometimes."

Satoko turned away crossing his arms, he didn't want to face his role model. "It makes'me forgot."

"Sure it does." Aiwaza chuckled, a hand went out for expression. "It's alcohol."

"Hn." He suddenly was clammed up.

"Look." A hand went down on his shoulder, the teen turned and looked up. They had this light father-son relationship now, and Eraserhead was still feeling fairly fresh in it, but good about it all same. It had fostered enough that when he wanted to show the kid he was being serious or wanted an answer, he could touch him to turn him. "How often y'do it?"

Fearfully Kasaya shook his head, eyes to the floor. "Ery'day."

"You an alcoholic?"

Saya nodded, eyes going fuzzy as they were set on the tiles.

Aiwaza just wondered what the hell it was that he'd felt he'd done that was so bad that he had to hide it inside the drink. "Y'can't be under th'influence when you're in there."

"I can't... I can't do that!" His head shot up.

"You hav'to." Aiwaza's grip got stronger. "Alcohol messes with the mind, y'can't drink alcohol and do this."

"NO!" He shouted pushing off him.

Aiwaza felt broken up a bit. One of his 'sons' just pushed him. But he would not be harsh with him, just firm. "If you don't pass Merge School, you're not gunna be able t'do what you said. You wanna be a hero right?"

"It's! It's not that! I... I can't go a full day! I've never been able to!" Fight or flight was kicking in. He was antsy.

"You're gunna have t'decide what y'want more. I'm..." Aiwaza tingled. He didn't say this that much: "I'm sorry."

Saya instantly started crying and collapsed into the floor. "Suki makes it less... but I still hav't'drink. I hav'to! I HAVE TO!"

Eraserhead sat on the floor by him, hunkering down to scoot against the wall. "Why do you'have to? Is it that bad?"

"Yeh." He was not okay with saying those details. He was not okay with telling the professor of the stabbing, the murders, the rape, the torture he'd do, the torture done to him.

"Look'I did a bit of thinkin'." Aiwaza started on. "Connelys you said?"

Satoko turned, his face wet, but instantly he was too bewildered at that name and hushed. Frozen.

"They own clubs in the area, lots of 'em. They're in the database as thugs."

"Y... You can... you d?" he babbled.

"I looked the name up." Eraserhead smirked. "You can't just give a pro hero a name, and expect them to let it go. There isn't a lot in the file, but it's enough that Mr. Connely..." Eraserhead felt odd for saying 'Mister', but that was the proper English terminology for an adult man. "has a warrant out for his arrest."

"Wha... what else?"

"That's it." The dark-haired man scratched his scuffy face, looked at him. "We do a lot of detective work as heroes. That's a part of it."

"Bu..."

"There's more than that isn't there?" He looked Satoko in his gray eyes.

He nodded silently, not crying now as he was enthralled, but his eyes represented another feeling: peeled out of his head, he was so afraid. "I'll... I'll go'to prison."

"What?" The pro hero scrunched the side of his mouth in. The 'what' coming out in a non-serious manner. "I don't think so."

"How do you know that?!" Satoko was irate. HE DIDN'T KNOW! And how could he be so lax about that? This was serious!

"If it's that bad, I'd plead your case."

"You'd... what?"

"Plead your case? Not too much up on legal terminology?" Eraser smirked, laced his fingers over his knees, adjusted his posture. His ass was starting to hurt from sitting on the tile floor. "It means goin' in and standin' up in court, if it come to that." He put up a finger. "That's another thing heroes do a lot."

"Court?"

"Court." He nodded. "A lot of the time we're the only witnesses to crimes that happen. I did 8 cases just last year."

Kasaya scooted right up next to him then.

And surprised Eraserhead put an arm around him, squeezing his upper bicep. "People think lives of pro heroes are all flashy and pizazz, and it's not. It's knees deep in the justice system. So... I'm guessin' your okay with being a dectective and being in the courthouse all the time too, hm? I figured, it's better to fill you in on that now than any other time, since that was the direction the conversation was goin' anyway."

"Nah. That's not it." He sniffed, but smiled. "I'd never thought I'd have the ability to..." Should he say it? "look into them."

"Sure. You get access to those things when you get accepted at a hero agency."

"Can I... uh." He got nervous. What was he asking exactly? "Look at their files?"

"On the Connelys? No." Blunt. "Police and pros only."

"But it involves me." He reeled back.

The kid did say prison. "What do you know?"

"A lot."

"Is it worse than a warrant?"

Satoko nodded. "Much." He sat back. "I'll do it." The back of his head went against the wall.

"Wha?" Eraserhead was shocked! These 'whoever they were' people, they weren't just 'whoevers' to Satoko. He wanted to know why. He obviously knew much more shit than he let on, and well, he was letting 'on' that he knew stuff. But he just wouldn't say what!

"I'll merge myself with it." He poked his temple with a finger. "I'll not..." He swallowed. "drink for it."

He was set on becoming a hero even more so now than he was before. The professional hero establishments had sharing abilities with the police force? That he did not know. He thought they were told basic stuff that they needed to know, and acted under the law, but with freedom to use their quirks to fight crime, not actually having the open capability to file share.

This would open up a whole new realm of help for him, for Hisashi. For Bakugo.

If Katsuki didn't have a moment to find data, he could, it'd have to be after they graduate, they'd have to spur this forward into time a little bit, but he could do this.

Hisashi's court case was so bare-bones.

They needed information, and with the fact that Eraserhead admitted he'd stand up for him there?

How great!

Kasaya brimmed with satisfaction.

He'd use his position as a hero to find them out. Build the case. Grow it.

Then they'd win.

As brothers.

Just as Hisashi had always said.

If getting there meant giving up alcohol for three days to have access to those files, then he would. Nothing would get in his way of taking them down.