Here you go, you've waited, and I've procrastinated, and you waited some more, then I got onto my ass and wrote this for you! Hope you love it.

I looked up into Edwards beautiful topaz eyes, and was momentarily mesmerized. Until I heard a familiar voice bring me out of my stupor.

"Bella! Bella, baby, are you alright?" Damon yelled over me, brushing my hair from my face.

"Damon." I whispered. I felt Edwards hand slip from mine, and involuntarily I reached for it and pulled him back.

"E-Edward…th-thank you." I gasped, tears in my eyes. His face was an unreadable mask as he looked at me. I felt my heart drop, then I looked closer at him and I saw that the corner of his mouth had pulled up a bit, in that crooked half smile that I loved to much. I was eternally grateful to this man, and I'd never once told him that. He saved me in so many more ways than just keeping the mortal me alive.

All that I had thought seemed to pass from my mind to his in an instant.

I love you Bella Swan, always have, always will. I heard him think, and he know that I could hear him. Tears threatened to spill again, and I nodded to him.

I know. I sent back to him unsure if he'd even hear it or not but from the look in his eyes he had gotten the message. I love you too Edward, but I have Damon now, and I love him too, he's been with me since I changed, through everything. He's a big part of me. Who I am. I sent to his mind again.

And I am…? He asked me.

You're a big part of who I was, and always, my first love. His eyes seemed to grow darker and they smoldered me.

"Bella, are you okay?" Damon asked shaking my should pulling me out of my daze.

"Yeah Damon I'm just fine, just need to lay down I think." I said slowly.

"Okay, I'll take you in." He said grabbing my hand from Edward, and Edward growled.

"No, I think I'll just stay here, Damon." I said, everything hurt, I couldn't move.

"No come on, you can make it to the house." He said trying to pull me up.

"Ah!" I cried out in pain as everything in me felt like it was on fire, and I saw Jasper drop to the ground like a sack of potatoes, he must be feeling my pain.

"No, Damon! L-let me go! It hurts everywhere." I screamed, but he didn't stop as I felt my head start to pound again, and tears spilled over as he flung me over his should and began to walk away.

"Put her down you jerk!" I heard Alice cry.

"Leave her alone!" Emmett yelled.

Everyone in "The Freaks" Coven stood by and watched everything. But Edward was not someone to do that, and within seconds I found myself pressed against Edwards chest, and cradled in his arms.

"Hey! Give her back to me!" Damon screamed as the Cullens formed a protective barrier around Edward and me.

I grabbed onto his shirt, clutched it in my hands as the pain increased, and rested my head on his chest.

"…hurts…so bad." I sobbed, and chocked on tears. I felt his flex, he was unsure if he should hold me tighter or loosen his grasp. I almost laughed, he was way considerate, and I knew he was a nice guy, but…but I can't just go back to him now. Not after what I did. It's unforgivable. He could never want me in the same way again, not after I put his family and him through what I did.

"You're okay, Bella. I promise." He whispered into my ear. And I shuddered and I saw him smile. It was just like old times, except we weren't the Edward and Bella Show anymore, and he may love me, but he doesn't really love me.

"Here we are." He said and I was set down on his bed, and he turned quickly and locked his bedroom door, and I laughed at such a human thing, if I vampire wanted in, his lock wouldn't be stopping it.

He seemed to catch what I did, and he as well laughed.

"Force of habit?" I asked.

"Living with Alice just running in and out of your room all your life, it would be a habit of yours too." He said, and I immediately felt that pang of anguish, and hurt in my stomach, it should have been a habit of mine, because I should have been with Edward.

"Thank you for today, and for everything Edward." I said feeling awkward. He looked at me a moment before turning his back to me and pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Why do you talk to me like that?" He asked in a whisper.

"Like what Edward?" I asked confused.

"Like that, like we're strangers!" He said getting mad, I could tell I didn't even need to see his face.

"We are strangers Edward. I'm not that same person and neither are you." I said seriously as I pulled a blanket over me, and rolled onto my side. I closed my eyes, hoping that would be the end of the conversation…but it wasn't. Not if Edward could help it.

"I love you Bella, I'd love you no matter what, and I'll want you and only you for as long as I exist." He said, from the position that his voice was in the room…it was like he was…"

I rolled over onto my other side, and came face to face with him. He was laying with my just like the old days, both of us in his bed. His hand reached out and he brushed my bangs out of my face.

"I love you Bella. I truly do." He said.

"I…I love you too Edward, but-"

"No 'buts' just let me be with you right now, like we used to." He said pulling me to him, and I snuggled into his chest, just like I used to.

"I've missed you Isabella Marie Swan." He whispered into my hair. And I felt the tears fall from my eyes as I took in his familiar scent, and held onto this familiarly cold body. He was my Edward, and I still want him. Oh I want him so badly.

OMC!! Yeah, she done it now!!

R&R

Love,

Fabulous me!