Chapter 36

(Madge POV)

I cry silently and lay on my cot for the rest of the morning until they bring inmy lunch tray. The woman who brings it never even so much as looks at me. Ever. She just carries it in, sets it down on the floor like I'm some kind of animal, and then leaves without a single uttered word.

I push myself up from the cot and saunter over to the tray. I've given up hope that they'll feed me anything edible but I still hold out hope for being able to salvage a slice of cheese or a piece of fruit from the meal. Today I find my lunch is a bowl of broth with a sparse amount of vegetables in it. Cold of course because why would they heat it up for me? And then there's the room temperature milk with the odd smell to it along with the crust of bread that's so stale it crumbles a little when I drop it to the plate. Why can't they give me something edible? Is this some sort of torture? They couldn't possibly be serving this same slop to everyone else in this place. Surely Gale would've mentioned it if that were the case.

I angrily knock over the bowl, spilling the broth all over the tray and floor. It feels surprisingly good to watch it spill so I take it a step further and throw the glass of milk at the wall. I've never done anything like that before. I've never been so angry that it felt necessary to throw things or to knock them over. And I've never had any idea how good it feels to do these sorts of things when you're angry. It's honestly the first thing I've done all day that felt remotely good.

After that little bout of satisfaction, I flop myself down on my cot again. Nothing else to do. I lie face down, my face buried in my pillow and let my thoughts run freely in my mind. I think about my father and my mother and how there are so many things I wish I'd told them. I wish I'd been able to see my mother one last time and know that it was the last time. Even my father, whom I was beyond angry at over his manipulation of Gale, I wished I could see just once more. Wished I could hug him just once more. It's the most unusual feeling to want to hug someone you feel betrayed you but that's what I'd do if I could see him just once more.

I think about Katniss and how I'm angry with her too. She was the reason that 12 had to be destroyed. She was so close to winning the games and coming home. So incredibly close to being done with that arena. And she chose to take her own life. But I also wonder how fair of me it is to be angry about it. She did the best she could in her moment, in her situation and I'm not sure I would have been able to do anything better myself had it been me. I mean, what was she supposed to do? How would anyone ever be able to live with themselves if they killed the person who professed to love them? No, she did what she felt she had to do and it isn't fair for me to fault her for it.

My mind wonders to Haymitch. I have more questions with him than I do answers. More confusion than clarity. I'd give just about anything for a good private conversation with him right now. I also wonder what happened to him when 12 was destroyed. He wasn't there. He would've been at the command center for the games, guiding his tributes through to victory. But what did that mean? Did they hold him responsible for Katniss and Peeta's defiance? Did they kill him? Torture him? Imprison him? Had he seen it coming and escaped the Capitol? Had he had his wits about him to get the heck out of there as soon as Katniss pulled out those berries? And how did he get that map that lead us to 13? Did he know what was here? Did he know that I'd be locked away in this cell or did he think that I'd find a safe haven here instead? I'm so lost as to what it is he knew about all of this. So lost as to what happened to him.

And then there's Gale. Sweet, loving, wonderful Gale. My Gale. My heart aches just at the thought of him. It's incredible how in such a very short time he became so vital to me. I can't even imagine my life without him now. Falling in love with him hands down the absolute best thing to ever happen to me. It saved my life even. Because, when I think about it, had it not been for him I most certainly would've died in the bombings. I doubt I would've made a run for the woods. And even if I had, I doubt I'd have lasted two days out there all alone. Yes, he most certainly saved me. Now all I need is to get out of this room so I can be with him.

My dinner tray doesn't prove much better than my previous meals. I leave it alone though, not throwing anything this time. I'm so hungry it hurts. Even when we were out in the woods for all those days on our way here to 13, I never felt as hungry as I do now. I haven't eaten all day and what measly scraps I ate yesterday weren't enough. How long can I go hungry like this before it makes me sick, I wonder?

I'm sitting on the floor, leaning back against the cot, daydreaming about having bacon wrapped chicken with a huge mound of mashed potatoes when Gale comes in.

"Hey beautiful, whatcha doing down there on the floor?"

"Daydreaming about real food." I say with a sigh.

"I've been daydreaming a little myself." He says as he takes a seat next to me.

"Oh yeah? What about?" I ask, dying for conversation.

"You." He says as he kisses my lips once gently. "Me." Another kiss. "You and me and this." He says kissing me longer, more intently.

"I like this kind of daydream." I say with a smile as I kiss him back eagerly.

"Me too." He says as his hands pull my hips forward, shifting us and then he eases us back onto the floor, him hovering over me. I feel him grab my pillow and place it under my head and then his lips find mine again.

I forget about wanting to have conversation and just drink in the feel of his hands and his lips. I'm nearly drunk with want for him when I hear him whisper in my ear.

"You have to eat the food."

At first I don't think I heard him because it was such a muffled whisper and I was so distracted by everything else but then I catch it. I don't get what he cares for, but I catch it.

When I have a chance I whisper back, hiding my words beneath my kisses. "Why?"

When he can safely answer, he whispers back. "It's a test."

I don't know what he means but he grabs me and pulls me closer again. "Eat. Shower. Be thankful."

He must have found out something. He must have learned something about this whole process. And I must be doing something wrong by not eating and by complaining. I wish I could ask questions. Wish he could do more than whisper vague warnings to me masked with a heavy make-out session. Wish I knew what he knew.

"Ok." I whisper back.

(Gale POV)

"Ok." She whispers back as her lips linger at my earlobe.

I can't explain everything I really need to tell her. I can't warn her properly. Not with them listening. Not when I'm terrified they might catch on at any second to our little kiss and whisper game. But I can't not warn her. I have to get her to start eating. Have to get her to seem less Capitol. If I don't, I will lose her.

I kiss her a little longer and then pull her to her feet as I stand. Our limited time is about to expire any minute now and I'll have to leave. "Probably ought to get you ready for bed. I have to go soon." I say.

"I'm glad you came to see me tonight." She smiles at me. Our eyes are locked with one another and I know she's trying to tell me thank you for the warning I just gave her.

"Mmmm, me too." I murmur as I lean down and kiss her once more.

"See you in the morning?" She asks as the door to her cell opens and I have to leave.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world." I say and then I let my forehead rest against hers and frame her face with my palms. "I love you." I tell her. Her blue eyes close for a second as I say it and I feel her hands clutch at my shirt.

"I love you too." She says back softly.

I leave and the door closes behind me. I know that she will eat now and I know that she'll shower without complaint. What I don't know is if it's going to be too little too late.

I'm on my way back to our apartment when a uniformed officer stops me in the hallway.

"Are you Gale Hawthorne?"

"I am." I reply cautiously. I'm not sure I want to know what he wants with me.

"Please follow me." He says plainly without an offer of explanation.

"Where to?"

"Violations Board."

"Violations? What kind of violations have I committed?" I ask, now on full alarm.

"All I do is collect and deliver." He tells me as if he could care less.

We walk a long ways and when we get to our destination, he has me swipe my badge on a device attached to the wall and then he swipes his right after. Another uniformed man points us down a narrow hallway and we wait outside a door. My nerves are killing me. I cannot imagine what it is they think I've done. Please, please don't let it be that I whispered a warning to Madge about the holding cell being a test. That won't be a good thing for either of us.

Finally, after what feels like a frigging lifetime, we get called into the room. He swipes his badge again for a woman at a long table and then he leaves. I stand there not sure what to do and she finally asks me to swipe my badge. I do.

A door on the other side of the room opens and three men come in and take a seat at the table.

"Gale Hawthorne?" One of them asks though I can't for the life of me figure out why they're asking. They've swiped my badge like a hundred times already so clearly they know I am the person they are looking for.

"Yeah."

"Please have a seat. We've brought you before the board this evening in regards to your recent violations." One of them begins.

"What violations?" I ask, trying my best to keep a steady, calm voice.

"Truancy."

"Truancy?" I echo. That's what this is about?

"Yes. Are you aware that all those under the age of 18 are expected to attend school in exchange for room and board?"

I nod. "I know I 'm supposed to be in classes but you see, my girlfriend, she's in holding and well, I can't go to class right now because she needs me. I have to go see her and I have to try to help get her cleared."

"Were your abscences authorized?" One man asks as he scrolls through his computer screen, brow furrowed.

"No. I wasn't aware they needed to be. Never crossed my mind really."

"Any absences exceeding one day are required to be authorized."

"By who?"

"Your instructors. I see here you haven't even attended a single class since your arrival here in 13."

"No, I haven't. Like I was explaining, my girlfriend needed me. Still needs me actually."

"Please excuse us while we discuss your violation." One man says and they all stand to leave.

I wait and then they finally return. I sit up straight. I'm anxious about whatever it is they're going to say but mostly I'm just relieved this has nothing to do with me warning Madge about the holding cell test. This, hopefully I can handle.

"Mr. Hawthorne, we have decided to be lenient since you are a newcomer. Your penalty will be one week sanitations duty, for one hour before breakfast and one hour following dinner, each day starting tomorrow. And you will be expected to report to classes in the morning with no further unauthorized absences."

Crap. They're cutting into all my visitation time with Madge. "Would it be possible to do the sanitation duties at a different time? I try to have a visitation with my girlfriend after breakfast and dinner each day. See, she's having a hard time and she needs me to help her hold it together while she waits to be cleared."

"Unfortunately, those are the hours the sanitation duties are always completed. I'm sure you'll have plenty of time for visitation in the evenings, after your obligations are fulfilled."

I swallow and nod. This is bad. She's going to be waiting for me in the morning after breakfast and I won't be there because I'll have school. I can't go before breakfast because I'll be working sanitation. It'll be evening before I can go. Just before dinner will be my first chance. She'll have to wait all day for me, wondering and not knowing where I am.

"Do you understand what we've explained?"

"Y-yes." I stutter. I can barely focus on them because all I can think about is Madge waiting and worrying all day tomorrow. I've already used all my time today and can't go back to tell her I'll be really late tomorrow. Rory. Maybe I can send Rory before breakfast.

I leave the room having now been dismissed and go home and my brother kicked back on his bunk, magazine in hand.

"Hey, I need a favor." I tell him.

"Yeah, what?" He asks without putting down the magazine. It annoys me that I feel like I don't have his attention. I snatch it away and he looks up at me sharply. "Hey!" He snaps.

"Sorry, look, I seriously need your help. It's about Madge."

Now I have his attention. "What?"

"Tomorrow, after breakfast, I need you to go see her and tell her I can't come until after dinner."

"That's it?" He asks looking unimpressed.

"No, I'm serious man, you have to do it. She's expecting me in the morning and if I don't show she'll have to sit there all day worrying. And she's not doing that great lately. It's important."

He shrugs. "Okay, I can tell her. But why can't you go see her yourself?"

"Got stuck doing sanitation work for two hours because I missed school too many times. Tell her I'll be there before she goes to sleep. And tell her I say I love her."

He shoots me a look. "Love her, huh?"

"Yeah, love her." I reply, not the least bit embarrassed to admit it even though he's waiting to tease the hell out of me about it.

"Alrighty then loverboy. I'll pass the word along." He says pulling the magazine back out of my hand. He must decide not to tease me too much since I seem so unashamed of it.

I feel mildly relieved to have him passing along my message. I still hate that I can't see her until tomorrow night but at least I can rest assured that she won't sit there worrying all the day long.

The next morning, I report for sanitation duty to find that basically, it's garbage collection. Not fun work but mindless enough that anyone could do it. I push through as fast as I can, emptying trash in all the rooms assigned to me. It's mostly a bunch of empty rooms with not much more than a table and chairs. Conference rooms most likely. And most of the trash cans are empty. It's easy enough work.

After breakfast, I head to class for the first time since I got here. My instructors are none too pleased that I've missed and am now behind everyone and one of them insists I stay after class today and get caught up. I try to argue that I can just take the work with me and do it myself but he won't give. So I'm forced to miss my pre-dinner visit with Madge. I will have no choice but to wait until after dinner and after my hour of sanitation work.

Because the classes are sorted by age, I haven't seen Rory all day so I have no idea how Madge is doing but hopefully, she's okay and I'm thankful she hasn't had to worry.

At dinner, I grab my tray and join my family who are already seated and eating.

"Hey Ror, everything cool with Madge this morning?"

"Actually, I went to see her but they said she was gone to shower or something and I couldn't wait cause I'd be late for class so I couldn't tell her your message." He tells me through a mouthful of broccoli.

"You what? You didn't tell her?" I nearly yell as I freak out, my heart already racing.

"Sorry, I tried. I can't be late and she wasn't in her room. What was I supposed to do?" He shrugs as if he doesn't get it.

I stare at him because I don't even have words. Oh my God this is so bad. She's been in there all day, locked up, waiting and waiting for me to show. This bad. Really freaking bad. And I still can't get there for another hour. She's going to have to sit and worry for at least another hour. She's probably falling apart by now, imagination running wild with ideas of where in the hell I am. It's horrible just thinking about it and I don't know how I'm going to make it up to her.

A/N: My apologies for making you guys wait an entire week for this update! Hopefully you enjoyed the new chapter and I promise to get the next chapter up as soon as possible!