Disclaimer: No, I don't own Teen Titans.
Chapter 35
"So..."
"So, indeed."
Robin scuffed his boot along the floor, at a loss for what else to do.
Starfire had heard his explanation. They had discussed it. She had told him he needed to do better. He agreed. What more was there to say?
Robin coughed.
They really had beaten the subject to death. Robin had come up with a plan of action. Starfire had approved it. So why did the situation still feel so...unresolved?
He forced his avoiding eyes back to Starfire.
"So," he started again, bravely marching on despite the pit in his stomach, "are we...good?"
This question seemed to break the stalemate, and Starfire sighed, letting herself fall into a lean against the back of the couch.
"Oh, Robin," she shook her head, "I know not what to say. My mind is at conflict with the desires of my heart."
"Well," Robin took a step towards her, holding out his hand, "maybe we can find a solution."
Starfire looked up at him, then at his proffered hand. She took a deep breath, then grasped it, allowing the boy wonder to lead her away from sitting area and to the kitchen. Robin sat her down, then walked around to the other side of the counter, and started rummaging around in the fridge.
"Robin?" Starfire question, confused, "why is it that you are inspecting the contents of the fridge? Are we not going to-"
"Ha!" Robin grinned triumphantly, slamming the door to the fridge and placing a dish on the counter, "I knew we had a little glorg left."
Starfire couldn't stop herself from smiling.
"We've been talking for a while," Robin explained, "so I think we need a snack to keep our energy up."
He pulled a power bar out from one of the cabinets, and folded his arms on the table across from Starfire, ready to continue.
"Tell me what your mind's telling you," Robin suggested, "why don't we start with that?"
Starfire pushed the plate away from her. It was a kind gesture, but she could barely consume the pudding of sadness when she was distressed, let alone glorg. Which, judging by the lack of movement on the dish, had definitely expired. Robin noticed, but didn't comment.
"My mind tells me that I have been stepped on," she admitted, "much of the time I do not speak when I am upset. I do the accepting, instead of the fighting. But I fear that this has not been a wise decision."
Robin frowned sadly, and didn't interrupt.
"Over the time that we have done the dating, and the time that we have done the knowing of each other, there have been many of the moments I speak of. When I first did the joining of the titans, you became the leader. On Tamaran," she looked towards the glass wall, "a ruler is meant to have the respect of their people," she turned back to look Robin in the eye, "so I gave the same respect to you. On Tamaran, my people would not go against their leader. It would be..." she searched for the phrase, "looked below on?"
Robin nodded.
"You were our leader, Robin."
He winced at her use of the past tense.
"So I gave my trust to you. I had thought that you were the just and the righteous, and all of the qualities a true leader should possess. But I was wrong," she looked down at her hands, "I allowed the blindness. I had many of the questions, and did not ask. I allowed the doubts to be pushed aside," she took a breath before looking back up, "but I can do so no longer. I may have caused the discomfort of myself, but I will NOT allow Ryan to do the suffering just because I choose to be weak."
"I...understand," Robin's shoulders slumped, and he dropped his own uneaten snack back down on the counter, "I didn't mean for this to happen. I..I really tried. I want to be a good leader. I want to be someone you can look up to. Someone you can trust," he stood up, "but I've failed you. I've failed everyone. Especially Ryan," he amended, "and I AM going to be better. I promise. But I understand if you want to break up, Star. I..." he tried his best to stop a tear from leaking out of his mask. His mentor would cringe if he saw him. Admitting defeat. Giving up. Not fighting. But there was something that his mentor hadn't taught him. The one thing any superhero with, at the bare minimum, their own sidekick, should know. How to be a team. How to be a good leader. How to care about those around you. Robin was not an expert. But at least he was trying to learn. He swallowed before saying, "I don't deserve you."
He turned around, not in an effort to seem cool or dismissive, but just to save himself from having to witness the unbearable moment when Starfire affirmed something he would almost rather die than have happen to him. When she said she wanted to leave.
"Robin?" Her quizzical tone startled him, and he turned back despite himself, "do you not want to do the hearing of what my heart has told me?"
"Uh," he approached the counter again, "yeah."
"My heart," she informed him, "has done the consistent reminding that you did the joining of Slade to save us from the deadly nanobots,"
Robin raised an eyebrow.
"What does that have to-"
"and that you asked none of the questions when we did the joining of the team, because you did the believing that it was the current person that is important, not the past," she continued, "and that you did the chasing of a green canine around for many of the hours to help us find friend Beast Boy when he had been taken by the alien that did the resembling of an infant, and that you flew to many planets until you could do the finding of me in my hour of distress, when I had done the running away, and that you were kind in supporting Cyborg, should he decide to leave us for the titans east, and that you did the risking of your life to go into the caves of fire and demons to do the finding of Raven when we thought Trigon had done the destroying of her..." she took a breath, having not stopped to inhale during her speech, "and that, though you do not speak of it as freely as I like," she added the criticism, "you love me. Possibly more than the city we are entrusted with guarding." Robin's mouth dropped, "and, though my mind does the cautioning," she flew for the first time in hours, hovering above the counter, "I love you too."
Robin was unprepared when she swooped down and let herself fall, but his reflexes kicked in, and he was able to catch her just in time, though the momentum sent him somersaulting out of the kitchen with her in his arms, until they fell, with Starfire underneath him.
"Star, I'm really going to try. But, those things you said - they're all true. You shouldn't-"
His eyes widened as Starfire reached up and pulled his head down towards her, capturing his protesting mouth in a deep kiss.
"Starfi-"
"As I have done the saying," Starfire spoke, Robin's hair still firmly in her grasp, "I am done with the keeping of quiet, and allowing others to do the instructing of me," she smiled mischeviously, "and I believe it is time that I am the one that does the instructing of YOU. So you WILL do the being of nice and the making of time for Ryan, and you will STOP doing the telling of me to leave when you are locked in with the evidence, and..."
"And what?" Robin asked.
"And you will STOP interrupting," she pulled the boy wonder back down on top of her, and this time, he was more than happy to oblige.
"MY EYES!" A loud voice called from the entryway, where the doors had just opened wide.
But neither of the liplocked titans cared.
/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\
"Seriously?!" Beast Boy cried, holding his grumbling stomach, "how are they STILL going?!"
Raven rolled her eyes.
"Well," Cyborg started, in a sing-song-y voice, "when a daddy titan and a mommy titan love each other very much-"
"How can you joke about this?!" Beast Boy demanded, "you've both walked in on them before!"
"That didn't stop you from being obnoxious about it," Raven deadpanned.
"Yeah," Cyborg folded his arms smugly, "now it's finally YOU'RE turn."
"UGH," Beast Boy threw his hands up in exasperation, then returned them to his middle, "when do you think they'll be done?!"
"Depends on who gets tired first," Raven turned to Cyborg, "who was it last time?"
Cyborg tapped his chin in mock thought, "I think it was Robin."
"Figures. Men." Raven shook her head.
"GUYS!" Beast Boy dropped to his knees, "I don't know how long I can last!" His stomach growled in agreement, "I'm so...hungry..." he curled up in a ball.
"You ate breakfast," Raven stated, "you'll live."
"I'm a growing beast!" Beast Boy whined, "and you guys had pizza!"
"You do remember that we went grocery shopping after that, right?" Raven asked, "Cyborg took the bags..."
Beast Boy's eyes lit up.
"DUDE! Last one to Cyborg's room's a rotton e-"
He smacked his face into a metal arm, blocking his path.
"No way I'm letting you into my room," Cyborg told him, "I'll go."
Beast Boy grumbled as he rubbed his sore face.
"I think he broke my nose..."
Raven shook her head at his dramaticness. She could tell that he was fine, even from a few feet away. She was pretty sure he'd actually be crying if his nose had been broken.
"MOMMY!" Marie's voice called from down the hall, "can we come out now?"
"No," Raven called back, "it hasn't been thirty minutes yet."
"But-"
"I thought you said you knew how to count to sixty thirty times," Raven interrupted, aniticpating that, much like her genetic parents, Marie wouldn't like someone telling her what she was or, in this case, was not capable of.
"I DO!"
"I won't believe you unless you show me," Raven replied calmly.
There was silence from the direction of Beast Boy's room.
"Are you counting?" Raven asked, not particularly concerned, but still wanting to know whether or not she and Beast Boy were about to have a tantrum on their hands.
"SHHHH!" Ryan called, "she's COUNTING!"
Raven smiled smugly.
"How did you DO that?" Beast Boy asked, "I can't get her to sit still, like...ever!"
"I told them they could have waffles for dinner if they didn't bother me for a half hour."
"...and that worked?"
Raven shrugged.
"Well, waffles aren't happening," Cyborg said, returning with the bags, "unless y'all wanna go and break up the love-fest in there?"
Raven shuddered. Beast Boy gagged.
"Don't act all grossed out," Cyborg chided them, "seems like that's where y'all're gonna end up. If Ryan and Marie're tellin' the truth."
Beast Boy gagged.
"Not. Happening. EVER." Raven growled.
"Relax," Cyborg waved them off, "so, what'll it be? Cold tofu? Tea bags?" He rummaged through the bags, "peanut butter and jelly?"
"Is the jelly vegan?"
"I'll pass."
Cyborg threw the jar of jelly at Beast Boy, so he could check for himself, and handed Raven a bag of chamomile.
"Just use the hot water in the sink," he sighed. Was he the only one who had a developed palate? Cyborg shook his head as he reached in and grabbed a bag of microwaveable curly fries, ripped it open, and stuffed a handful of the lukewarm potatoes in his mouth. He grinned to himself. Now this was more like it.
"FITY-SEVEN!..."
"Uph-oh..." Cyborg said through his fries.
"FITY EIGHT!..."
Raven phased out into one of her portals, abandoning the boys.
"FITY-NINE!"
"Huh?" Beast Boy looked up from the list of ingredients he was struggling to read.
"A hundid!" Ryan cried in excitement.
"No," Marie scolded him, "it's SISTY."
"Oh..."
There was a brief pause.
"SISTYYYYYYY!" Ryan bellowed, as he and Marie burst through the door to Beast Boy's room, and ran straight for the boys.
"I'm hungry!" Marie announced, "Mommy said we could have waffles!"
Bloodhound-pup Ryan put his nose to the ground, sniffing for the trail to their beloved breakfast food. His nose led him to a bag by Cyborg's feet.
"WOOF!" He barked in excitement, tearing through the paper with his claws, trying to uncover the prize beneath.
"Ryan! You gotta stop it!" Cyborg tried to pull the growling dog away, but Ryan morphed into a chipmunk, sliding our from Cyborg's arms and back towards the bag, where he resumed rummaging as a bear cub, throwing non-waffle contents aside as he saw them.
"Ryan," a calm, but menacing voice threatened, "if you don't stop that, you're going to bed without dinner."
Ryan raised a bear-brow at Raven, who had somehow managed to acquire a mug to steep her tea in, and swatted the bag again.
"No dinner," she took a long sip, "means NO WAFFLES."
Ryan immediately transformed back.
"Good boy."
"Aww, man..." Cyborg groaned.
Despite Raven's intervention, there had been many casualties. The milk carton was bleeding out from a slice sustained by Ryan's nails, multiple bags of chips had been ripped open, the jar of marinara littered the floor in red glass, egg yolks leaked down the walls... But by some miracle, the waffle mix remained untouched.
Cyborg shook his head, starting down the hall, "I'll go get the mop."
Beast Boy dug through the remaining bags that Ryan hadn't touched, and lifted up a pack of imitation sausages.
"Hey," he grinned, "at least my tofu dogs are ok!"
"Too bad you can't cook them," Raven reminded him.
"Why can't he cook?" Marie tugged on Raven's cloak, much to the empath's irritation.
"Is Uncle Beast Boy in trouble?"
"Usually."
"I'm not in trouble!" Beast Boy defended himself, "Robin and Starfire are just being all lovey-dovey and blocking the kitchen!"
"What is 'love-ee-dov-ee'?" Marie asked.
"They're busy," Raven interpreted, glaring at Beast Boy, "and they don't want to be interrupted."
"It's ok," Marie smiled, "we'll be quiet!"
"Wha-"
But before either of the titans could react, Marie had opened the common room doors, and she and Ryan walked right into-
"NO!" Beast Boy cried, shoving his hands over Ryan's eyes, "don't look!"
"STOP!" Raven captured Marie in a ball of black.
"Uh...guys?" Robin raised a brow, comfortably seated two feet away from Starfire on the couch.
"Greetings my bumgorfs!" Starfire smiled, gliding over the couch like her old self and enveloping the children in a hug, "why do friends Beast Boy and Raven request that you not enter?"
"We thought..."
"I...uh...I saw..."
Starfire blushed.
"I can offer my assurance that the event you witnessed was not intended to discourage you from joining us."
"Uh..." Beast Boy gulped, "that's ok - I'm good!"
Raven rolled her eyes.
"So what have you been doing in here?"
"Well," Robin started, "after, uh...we were actually talking about Ryan." He smiled in the boy's direction, and Ryan, clearly unaccustomed to such things but grateful nonetheless, smiled brightly back, fangs beared in a Beast Boyish grin.
Robin stepped towards him and kneeled down to his level.
"I was thinking," he put a hand on Ryan's shoulder, "you and me haven't had a lot of time to hang out together."
Ryan nodded eagerly, thrilled to have such undivided attention.
"So, what do you say we do something just me and you?" Robin asked warmly, "the amusement park, the aquarium - anything you want."
"Can..." Ryan started shyly.
"It's okay," Robin encouraged, "anything you want."
"Can we do a...a sleepover?" Ryan immediately lowered his eyes to the ground not wanting to witness as his father rejected him yet again.
"Um..." Robin took a moment to consider the logistics of this request. Despite the makeout session Beast Boy had witnessed, he wasn't going to further tarnish his reputation as a responsible professional, so there was no way the three of them were sleeping in Star's room. And Robin's room? He himself had almost sliced a finger off while feeling around one of his drawers for a pen, and finding a misplaced bird-a-rang. He'd stepped on throwing stars on numerous occasions, and would doubtlessly have had his feet covered in bandages if he hadn't been wearing boots. If Ryan, a shapeshifter whose forms didn't all have padding, were to cut himself... Starfire would kill him. No. He wouldn't endanger Ryan's life. He was trying to bond with him, not kill him.
"I'm sorry," he frowned, "but a sleepover is..." he noticed Starfire's eyes glowing green, "...a GREAT idea!" He laughed fakely. "But...uh..." He wracked his brain for a plausible solution to the problem. They could do a camping-style sleepover in the common room. But again, there were too many ways Ryan could destroy things or hurt himself. He could switch rooms with Starfire, but then she'd have the same health risks as Ryan. Which left Terra and Raven's rooms, which were both off-limits, and... Robin sighed. He knew it had been cleaned, but the idea of stepping into what was once the most repulsive room in the tower still sickened Robin's organized nature to the core.
"We have to sleep in Beast Boy's room," he glanced at the teen in question.
"Sure," Beast Boy shrugged, "I don't know how many more nights I could stand sleeping with Raven in the bunk bed anywa..." He noticed the glare Raven was giving him, and the way Robin was smirking. "Uh, that's fine!" He squeaked in closing.
"Ryan and Marie can just share again," Raven affirmed, though she continued scowling at Beast Boy.
"Where are YOU sleeping?" Marie demanded, looking from Beast Boy to Raven and back.
"I will be in my room," Raven responded icily, "just like you will be in your room, and Beast Boy will be in his room, because you don't need us to sleep with you."
"But-"
"Robin and Ryan will be there," Raven interrupted, "I'm sure they'll scare away the tentacle guy."
"NO," Ryan cried, in conflict with his friend, "JUST me and Daddy are having a sleepover. NOT YOU." He pointed angrily.
"FINE," Marie shouted back, "I don't want to do a sleepover with you ANYWAY!"
She stuck out a pink tongue, and Ryan stuck his out in kind.
"Ryan," Robin adopted a stern tone, "that's not nice!"
It took Robin a lot of willpower not to chastise Marie as well.
"Well, she's not sleeping in my room," Raven stated, "I need a night ALONE."
"And I don't need a night alone?!" Beast Boy cried.
"Not as much as I do. Unless you want me to lose control of my emotions and blow up the TV."
"Fine," Beast Boy grumbled, folding his arms, "there's a couch in the room I'm in," he avoided the possessive reference to the girl who, he was slowly accepting, was not coming back.
Marie started to protest.
"But I wanna-"
"Oh, this is a most joyous occasion!" Starfire crushed Robin and Ryan to her chest in a bear-hug that Ryan happily returned, and Robin struggled to breathe through, "we must celebrate this night of the father-bumgorf bonding!"
"Ok," Cyborg came back in, holding the remainder of the groceries, "I think we have JUST enough eggs left for those waffles."
"Glorious!" Starfire clapped, "I shall procure the celebratory extra-spicy mustard!"
Raven and Beast Boy internally sighed in relief at the distraction, which tore Marie away from the subject of sleeping mates. That was something they could deal with after bath time.
/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\_/\
"Yes, titans," Ms. Wilson watched the group through Cyborg's eye, "enjoy yourselves."
She swiveled in her chair to face the many insectoid Robots. She had thought that their conflicts would distract them from her little minions. But happiness could be an equal if not more effective cause for disarmament. Soon her little robots would be all over the tower, putting the necessary pieces in place. When their mission was completed, she had only to decide when to strike. She chuckled. The titans wouldn't even know there was a correlation. No disks with cryptic letters adorned these bots, and she had been careful to ensure that they were made from all new materials, none of which would be traced back to her father. It was going to be so much fun to see the titans race around, trying to find some new villain to blame, when it was her all along. And in the meantime? She laughed. Her original plan remained. Introduce herself on her own time, and make them her little, tauntable playmates. All while enjoying her little inside joke.
Ms. Wilson looked back at the monitors. The meal was ending. The time to strike would be soon. In just a few short hours, they would all be tucked into bed. Caught up in their own dreams and desires, completely, wonderfully oblivious to what was being set in motion.
"Soon," she told the waiting bots, "soon."